I held my phone, and somehow my thoughts were pulled back to a long, long time ago.
Some strange yet familiar fragments.
It surges into my memory.
"Zhou Fang! You said you'd come to my house for breakfast tomorrow, and you're late again!!"
"Zhou Fang, it hurts! Carry me!"
"Zhou Fang, they all said we were engaged. What is an engagement?"
"Zhou Fang, pick that big orange!"
"Zhou Fang..."
…
"Are you being unreasonable? Is being on time considered late?"
"Who told you to run so fast? Come up."
"That I will marry you."
"I know, I know, little ancestor."
"Shen Qingli! Do you have the manners to call me brother?"
…
I burst into tears, "Zhou Fang, I don't have a grandpa anymore. Grandma said everyone will leave, and no one can stay with Lili forever."
He coaxed patiently, "I will, Lili. I will always be with you."
I blinked back my tears, "Zhou Fang, you always look like a fool."
He raised his chin proudly and corrected like a little adult, "It's Brother Tu."
…
My childhood, recent memories, and finally the news of Zhou Fang’s death kept weaving in my mind.
I reached out and pressed my chest hard, but my face was dry.
"Nanzhi..."
Lu Shiyan was stunned and quickly comforted her: "The dead are gone. What you are doing now will only affect your own body."
I was silent for a long time before I murmured, "I remember..."
But now that I remember it, the news of his death is even more difficult for me to accept.
Lu Shiyan, "What?"
"Senior, I remember a lot of things..."
Hearing this, Lu Shiyan quickly called the doctor in. After asking some questions, he made a preliminary judgment that the accident had stimulated my nervous system, which led to the recovery of my memory.
After seeing that the doctor was not Caucasian, I realized, "Senior, aren't we in the country now?"
"Yes, in Country F."
Lu Shiyan explained, "Qi Chuan's information network in China is very well-informed. I sent you to the hospital, and after your condition stabilized, I brought you to Country F first. I thought everything would wait until you woke up and let you decide for yourself."
"Thanks……"
I appreciate his thoughtfulness.
The place I least want to stay now is by Fu Qichuan's side.
Those failed and unbearable past will attack me again and again.
A few days later, the Zhou family held a grand funeral for Zhou Fang.
Lu Shiyan asked me if I wanted to return to China to participate.
I refused.
Zhou Fang will not die.
He never broke his promise to me.
That day, my physical condition had almost recovered and the doctor said I could be discharged from the hospital at any time.
When Lu Shiyan returned from the hospital after completing the discharge procedures, I hesitated and said, "Senior, I may not plan to return to China for the time being."
I don't want anyone to control my freedom anymore.
Let them think I'm dead.
"real?"
Unexpectedly, Lu Shiyan didn't object at all and sat beside the bed. "I got some news, and I was hesitant about whether to tell you."
"you say."
"There may be other reasons behind Zhou Fang's death."
He poured me a glass of warm water and said, "On the night of the explosion at the experimental base, a hidden force applied for a flight from Jingcheng to Country F."
"You mean,"
I looked at him and asked, "Maybe Zhou Fang came to Country F?"
"If he is still alive, this possibility cannot be ruled out."
"Then I was just..."
I pursed my lips and said, "By the way, I can ask for news about him in Country F."
"Yes, sure."
Lu Shiyan handed me the warm water and said, "Nanzhi, I respect all your choices."
"Besides, I actually support you staying in Country F," he said.
I pursed my lips slightly, "Why?"
"I have a friend from Country F who's a top psychologist. Nanzhi, she can definitely cure your depression."
"Senior, I told you, that Sertraline belongs to Jiang Lai..."
I don't want to admit it.
Lu Shiyan reached out and touched the scar on my wrist that had just healed. "First you cut your wrist, then you jumped into the lake. It's obvious you don't take your life seriously and have no desire to live anymore. And you still want to hide this from me?"
"I……"
I tilted my head to look out the window, "I don't know what's going on..."
I can't control my thoughts.
I can't even control my own body.
In fact, there were such signs a long time ago.
However, the month after returning to Jiangcheng from Jingcheng became increasingly obvious.
It was Jiang Lai who noticed the problem and forcibly dragged me to the hospital, where I was diagnosed with severe depression.
On the day I cut my wrists, if I hadn't had to go to Jingcheng to check on Zhou Fang's condition, I might not have even bothered to bandage the wound.
"It doesn't matter."
Lu Shiyan leaned over and looked me in the eyes. "You're just sick, Nanzhi. How can anyone not get sick in this world? It's just that some people have physical illnesses, while others have mental illnesses. After you're discharged from the hospital, I'll take you to see my friend. I've already talked to her about your situation, and she's very confident."
"Thang..."
"Also, do you remember when we were in college, your teacher wanted you to go abroad with me, right?"
"Yes, I remember."
At that time, my teacher was very impressed by my talent, but I didn't have any extra money.
Studying abroad, even if the tuition was free, the daily expenses were still a huge sum of money for me at that time.
I laughed and said, "Don't you think that at my age, I still have to hang out with those college students..."
"no."
He laughed. "There's a talented designer who wants to take you in as his apprentice. He saw your work and said that if you weren't constrained by the market, you would probably design even more amazing works."
Lu Shiyan arranged everything for me.
Medical treatment and career.
Nothing is delayed.
I looked at him gratefully and chuckled, "Senior, you are so thoughtful. I can't repay you..."
"That's enough."
He pointed to the red string on his hand that held the jade beads.
I didn't want to tell him that when I found out it was his birthday, it was too hasty and I snatched the jade beads from the neck of the cat at home.
I also asked my mother to help me string a red string together and gave it away as a birthday gift.
I said honestly, "This...is not worth much."
Lu Shiyan chuckled, "Do you think I'm short of money?"
"……Too."
I remembered something, "Senior, after you saved me a few days ago, did you see a rabbit jade pendant?"
The rabbit jade pendant is missing.
"Rabbit jade pendant?"
Lu Shiyan was stunned for a moment, then replied gently, "It doesn't seem to have any seals. Could it have fallen into the Fu family's old house?"
"Won't."
Ever since I knew this was something my mother left me, I have always worn it close to my body.
Never took it off.
Lu Shiyan frowned. "It might have fallen into the lake. I'll contact the police in Jiangcheng to see if they've salvaged it."
"Tuo."
I nodded.
However, I also know that there is a high probability that I can’t find it back.
All the police could salvage was the car.
Even if the jade pendant fell into the car, no one would know where it went during the salvage process.
It is as difficult as finding a needle in a haystack.
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