Yan Cen sat on the bed with rapid breathing, holding the financial book tightly in his hands. The bulging veins on his back were enough to show his emotions at the moment -
it was a shock that he could not adapt to, expanding at a lightning speed, and at any time he might completely explode his precarious sanity.
Zizi.
The charging mobile phone vibrated.
Yan Cen's condensed thoughts loosened, and his eyes shifted unconsciously.
Li Yu'an's mobile phone screen lit up, which was a daily news reminder sent by web text message. In addition, there were several unread messages from the work group piled up on it.
At this moment, Yan Cen suddenly had an impulsive intuition, clamoring for him to pick up the phone in front of him to find out.
"..."
Yan Cen was silent, and his slightly frowned brows revealed a trace of struggle and hesitation.
In the past, he would never cross the line and check his lover's phone without his lover's permission.
But now, Yan Cen's reason and sense of propriety were gradually eaten away by his increasingly strong intuition.
Li Yu'an must be hiding something from him!
If he doesn't take a risk and break his sense of propriety to find out now, with his personality, he will definitely be able to hide him for the rest of his life!
"Yu'an!"
Yan Cen suddenly raised his voice, using a poor excuse, "My phone is out of battery. Can I use your phone to call you back?" "
Whatever!"
Li Yu'an in the bathroom responded hastily, his voice trembling with panic.
Unfortunately, Yan Cen didn't have the energy to figure out the situation at the moment. He got his lover's permission by "error" and swiped his phone hesitantly.
The password keyboard appeared.
Yan Cen entered his date of birth without thinking, and sure enough, it was unlocked with a "click".
Yan Cen took a deep breath and managed to find some ideas -
he just wanted to know what Li Yu'an's note was for him? Was it Yan Cen with his full name, or was it his senior with his own unique thoughts?
Yan Cen's fingertips hesitated on the WeChat icon for two seconds, and then he clicked it heavily.
He thought he was ready to "check", but the moment the pinned content jumped into his eyes, he was still stunned. It's
very simple to pin Li Yu'an's WeChat.
The top avatar is Yan Cen's current WeChat ID, and the WeChat avatar below is also familiar to Yan Cen.
It is a photo of Huang Dou when he was a child, taken when he just picked it up.
"..."
How come Yu An has his old WeChat ID? And when did he add him?
Yan Cen clicked on it puzzled, and the moment he saw the content of the WeChat clearly -
his heart suddenly "exploded", and intense emotions quickly traveled through his body, forcing his eyes to turn red.
"Happy New Year."
That was a punctual blessing for four consecutive years, but he never got a response.
What kind of feelings would make Li Yu An collect his books? Keep the candy wrappers he gave? Send blessings on time every New Year's Day, but dare not say another word?
Yan Cen remembered Li Yu An when they first met, and also remembered Li Yu An after they met again -
every time!
Almost every time they meet!
The other party will reveal that kind of panic and restraint, but also hidden excitement, and at the same time will try to escape and avoid him as much as possible after an "awkward" situation occurs.
He clearly called "senior" more than once when he was drunk, but never mentioned it after waking up, and even deliberately distanced the two from the relationship of senior and junior in the early days of getting along?
Yan Cen didn't understand Li Yu'an's thoughts in the past, but now he understands it completely-
he mistakenly thought that Li Yu'an had someone he liked when he was in college? He mistakenly thought that he was the first to fall in love and pursued Li Yu'an?
But in the end, he found out that Li Yu'an had different thoughts about him as early as college? The "feelings" he gave were far less than one thousandth of the other party!
No one can remain indifferent in the face of absolute and pure secret love, and Yan Cen is no exception.
Yan Cen took a breath with difficulty. In addition to being filled with shock and emotion, he also felt an indescribable bitterness -
how could she be so stupid as to hide it all these years? How could she not leak a single word in front of him? And why couldn't he find out earlier? Show up earlier? Respond earlier?
Yan Cen blamed himself for showing up too late, and felt so distressed for Li Yu'an that he couldn't control himself.
...
The bathroom door that had been closed for a long time finally moved.
Yan Cen immediately broke free from his strong emotions, stood up and rushed over as fast as he could.
"Yan Cen, I'm going to take a shower..."
Li Yu'an looked at Yan Cen who suddenly rushed to him and froze in his place.
His face was very red, and there was still a hint of drunkenness in the corners of his eyes, and there was also some indescribable shyness.
"Yu'an."
Yan Cen had difficulty speaking, and his originally gentle voice unexpectedly became hoarse and suppressed.
Li Yu'an noticed his abnormality, and the curve of his mouth slightly narrowed, "Yan Cen, what's wrong with you? Are you not feeling well?"
Yan Cen didn't know where to start, "Sorry, I just wanted to look for the data cable in the cupboard."
"..."
Li Yu'an didn't understand, and his eyes instinctively turned to the bedroom.
When he saw the financial book on the bedside table clearly, his face changed suddenly.
"I know I shouldn't make up false excuses to look at your phone, but I just couldn't help it. You can blame me and be angry if you want—"
Yan Cen did not evade his own lack of sense of propriety, but he couldn't help asking, "Why didn't you tell me that you liked me a long time ago?"
"..."
After the second half of the sentence came out, Li Yuan'an trembled all over.
Yan Cen stared at him without blinking, and there was a storm in his eyes that Li Yuan couldn't understand, "Did you know I would come to the banquet at the Bo family? And why did you choose to submit your studio's project to GM? You..."
"No!"
Li Yu'an suddenly stopped him loudly, shaking his head anxiously, "No!"
"Yan Cen, listen to me, I didn't mean to get close to you on purpose. I really didn't know you would come to that party. I am very happy to see you... " "
It's the same with the project. When Pei Yi suggested that I submit the information to GM, I hesitated, fearing that it would not be appropriate. In the end, I thought of giving it a try for the sake of the project itself."
"..."
Yan Cen was surprised to hear Li Yu'an's explanation.
He didn't expect that his eager expression would be misunderstood by his lover like this?
In just a few seconds, Li Yu'an's face turned from red to white, and he fell back unconsciously, "I never meant to get close to you on purpose, really, I..."
Yan Cen quickly wrapped him in his arms and pressed him against the bathroom door in an instant.
—— Bang!
The bathroom door hit the wall with a loud noise.
Yan Cen took the initiative to protect the back of Li Yu'an's head from being hit. His heartache was uncontrollable. "Yu'an, don't explain, there is no need to explain. I don't blame you. I..."
Yan Cen looked at Li Yu'an who was so close to him. His heart and eyes were occupied by only one thought -
whether now or in the future, he would never let the other party go!
"How can I bear to blame you."
Before the sound fell, Yan Cen lowered his head and kissed him hard. He pried open his teeth without saying anything and drove straight in.
The cheek that was occasionally rubbed was wet, and it was unclear whose tears it was for a while.
Love rushed in, plundering each other's reason, breathing and heartbeat.
Perhaps it was because he had been in the bathroom for too long, Li Yu'an, who had drunk too much, was already dizzy. Now stimulated by the deep kiss, he quickly collapsed in Yan Cen's arms, allowing himself to be taken.
Although the long deep kiss carried a hint of coercion that did not allow for resistance, it was also full of soothing meanings.
Li Yu'an's heart seemed to be injected with magma, and the heat dispelled all the coldness and haze. His spirit, which was tense because of the misunderstanding, relaxed, and when he reacted again -
Yan Cen had already carried him back to the bedroom.
Li Yu'an knelt on Yan Cen's knees, and the two of them were face to face, and their breaths were filled with each other's familiar breath.
Yan Cen kissed him from his forehead to the corner of his mouth, apologizing and coaxing, "I'm sorry, I was too anxious just now, so I used the wrong tone and asked the wrong questions."
"Don't be sad, and don't be angry with me, okay?"
"Yeah."
Under the comfort of his lover, Li Yu'an's original panic disappeared completely.
He glanced at the books and mobile phone on the bedside table with his peripheral vision, and covered it up vaguely, "...Did you see them all?"
"Do you want me to see them? Why don't you tell me?"
Yan Cen asked knowingly, wanting to hear the most direct admission from Li Yu'an's mouth.
Li Yu'an buried his head in the crook of his neck and did not answer directly, "I don't want you to know."
"I didn't approach you on purpose, and I don't want to kidnap you with these one-sided 'feelings'."
Yan Cen's fingertips passed through his hair and gently stroked it, "I know your personality, so you don't have to explain so much to me, but I want to know, when did it start?" When did you
start to like him?
Li Yu'an heard Yan Cen's heartbeat, one after another, showing him that his heart was definitely not calm at the moment.
He finally let out a sigh of relief, "In your freshman year, you led the team to win an award in the province."
The school specially set up a special on-campus award ceremony at the end of the semester. As the team leader, Yan Cen represented the team to give a speech and receive the award.
At that moment, Li Yu'an heard the exclamations from the surroundings, and also heard his own heartbeats more violently than ever before.
"Since you have a crush on me, why didn't you think of coming to me?"
Yan Cen thought that his memory was pretty good, but apart from the accidental rear-end collision near graduation, he searched his memory and couldn't find any scenes related to Li Yu'an.
"Like other people, I will try every means to meet you and get in touch with you? If so, I will just be an ordinary junior student here."
During his freshman year, Li Yu'an was still a young master who had not suffered a family change. He wanted to save face and had backbone. He didn't want to be like other suitors -
acting impulsively just because he liked someone, and in the end he could only get the same gentle rejection from Yan Cen.
Yan Cen could imagine Li Yu'an's unique arrogance, but his tone was tinged with a little regret, "If you don't try, how do you know I will reject you?"
Li Yu'an didn't answer.
After all, so much time has passed, and it is meaningless to make assumptions.
Yan Cen sighed, "So, you have been holding it in and not saying anything?"
Li Yu'an's tone was lower, "I have tried hard, I am just a little bit short."
Just a little bit, he can stand beside Yan Cen and receive the award openly, just a little bit, he can use his strength as a knock on the door, and then get to know Yan Cen, the senior he has admired for a long time.
Yan Cen reacted quickly, and slightly distanced himself from Li Yu'an to look at each other, "So you participated in that competition because of me?"
Li Yu'an recalled the past, and his mood was not very good, "Yeah."
That huge online anonymous competition was actually more of a competition for "social entry tickets" for graduates.
Li Yu'an accidentally learned from his tutor that Yan Cen would participate, so he successfully registered an anonymous vest on the last day and participated in this turbulent competition.
Yan Cen has always been pragmatic. He did not make a strange vest or avatar, but the simplest initials of his name.
After the first round of promotion rankings came out, Li Yu'an confirmed his identity.
He worked hard to move up little by little towards the first place in the leaderboard, but was hit hard at the last moment.
When Pei Huan spent money to steal his identity and work with Yan Cen, he had to drop out of school under heavy pressure.
"I have had several dreams about receiving awards. Every time I wanted to go on stage to receive an award, Pei Huan would run up in front of me."
"I also dreamed that you and Pei Huan walked off the stage, talking and laughing, and passed by me."
"Later, I accepted my fate. Dreams are just dreams. If I miss them, it's just..."
Yan Cen stopped him seriously, "Yu'an, we didn't miss each other."
He kissed the corner of Li Yu'an's eyes and repeated again, "We won't miss each other in the future."
Li Yu'an caught the deep affection in Yan Cen's eyes, and his nose was sour, "Yeah."
Yan Cen thought of the old WeChat account again, "Except for those New Year's greetings, you haven't sent any other words?"
Li Yu'an expressed his concerns, "You don't know me, I don't know what to say, and I'm afraid of disturbing you."
"Are you stupid?" Yan Cen frowned, "If I never return to China, if the two of us never meet again, what are you going to do?"
"I'll send it one year at a time." Li Yu'an whispered his true thoughts, "Even if I don't get a response, it's good to have hope."
Yan Cen's chest was filled with sour heartache, and he couldn't do anything about the person in front of him, "You..."
"Yan Cen."
"Hmm?"
Li Yu'an knew that he was ridiculously stupid in this regard, but for so many years, he never regretted it for even a second.
He met Yan Cen's eyes again, and for the first time he had the courage to admit, "I like you, and I have for a long time."
The heartbeat that started at the age of 19, after being buried for several times, stumbled and turned, was finally firmly expressed by the 26-year-old Li Yu'an.
Love exploded.
Yan Cen kissed quickly and forcefully, and deep and fierce affection gushed out from his eyes. Li Yu'an wrapped his arms around his arms, rarely actively catering to the other's breath.
As the kiss became more and more intense, the numbness like electric current surged to the brain.
Li Yu'an used the last bit of his rationality and slightly withdrew, "...Yan Cen."
Yan Cen chased after him unsatisfied, and asked in a restrained and hoarse voice, "Is it not possible?"
"Yes."
Amidst the violent heartbeat, Li Yu'an heard himself quietly inviting, "I have just dealt with it. I bought yours in the bottom compartment of the bedside cabinet..."
Yan Cen realized belatedly that the lovers had indeed stayed in the bathroom for too long tonight.
Li Yu'an was willing to drown in Yan Cen's eyes, "Do you want me?"
He longed to be owned, occupied, controlled, and loved.
Yan Cen's so-called restraint was torn to pieces by this sentence, and the hugging posture of the two changed.
The kiss was full of desire, an attack that wanted to tear each other apart and then occupy each other.
The tide pulled up and down, round after round, with no end.
…
After an unknown amount of time, Li Yu'an finally thought of "escaping", but was dragged back into a familiar embrace.
"Yan, Yan Cen."
Li Yu'an could not recognize his own voice, and was crying visibly.
Yan Cen kissed the corner of his eyes and coaxed him gently, "Sorry, don't call me like that."
Li Yu'an pretended not to understand and choked for a while, "Yan Cen."
Yan Cen insisted, "No, I won't bother you if you call me that."
As the danger approached, Li Yu'an trembled and murmured, "Senior."
"Be good, call me again."
"Senior... um!"
The tail tone was completely swallowed up, and Li Yu'an lost his mind for a moment.
…
…
When he woke up again, the night outside the slit of the window curtain had not changed.
Li Yu'an lay motionless in the quilt, his brain was dull, and his body and mind had not yet escaped from the vortex, unable to tell whether it was real or a dream.
Footsteps were approaching.
Li Yu'an's eyelids were too heavy to lift, and he could only let out a soft sob.
Suddenly, a familiar palm covered his forehead, "Yu'an, are you awake?"
Li Yu'an raised his eyes with difficulty, and his vision went from blurry to clear, "Yan Cen."
His voice was hoarse and almost silent, and the discomfort was rushing through his body. Li Yu'an wanted to cry for no reason.
Yan Cen leaned over and kissed the tip of his nose, "Be good, your fever has just subsided, wait for me."
-
Half an hour later, Li Yu'an finally regained a little spirit under Yan Cen's meticulous care.
He looked at himself in the front camera of his phone. His hair was messy, his eyes and lips were swollen, and he was seriously deficient in blood after a day of fever.
Li Yu'an looked at the culprit who was stirring the millet porridge, and his eyes were full of complaints.
Yan Cen fed the millet porridge to him, "Fill your stomach first, and I'll make you something delicious tomorrow."
Li Yu'an was unhappy, "You've been eating in the room for three consecutive days."
Yan Cen laughed, "I promise I won't bother you after this meal, so you can have a good rest."
Li Yu'an didn't have the strength to take the bowl and spoon, so he had to accept the feeding, and continued to refute vaguely, "...I don't believe you."
His arrogance was obvious.
Yan Cen fed him another mouthful of millet porridge and teased him, "We've run out of food, so we can't make any more trouble. If you want, I'll go to the supermarket later."
It took Li Yu'an a few seconds to understand what "food" meant. He was immediately embarrassed and shocked, "What? I... cough cough cough!" He
was so choked that he couldn't even speak.
Yan Cen stroked him, helplessly, "Are you feeling better?"
"I...you..."
Li Yu'an took a deep breath, remembering the box of kits he had bought beforehand, and stammered, unable to make sense.
Yan Cen continued his feeding work and explained, "I've already used your phone to ask for leave from the studio."
Now that "The End of the Fog" has been put on track, all departments only need to follow the procedures in the short term, and nothing serious will happen.
Li Yu'an said "Oh", with a little anger at the end of the tone.
After continuous close interaction, Yan Cen had completely broken through the invisible barrier in Li Yu'an's heart, allowing him to easily reveal his true temper.
"I was wrong. I promise not to be so cruel in the future, okay?"
"..."
Li Yu'an said nothing and ate the millet porridge in no time. "I'm going to sleep."
He said he was going to sleep, but he still maintained a sitting position and didn't dare to move easily.
Yan Cen understood his hypocrisy and found a soft pillow for him. "You just finished eating, don't rush to sleep, let's chat for a while."
Li Yu'an met his gentle eyes and was reluctant to refuse, "Oh."
Yan Cen also leaned on the back of the bed, leaving a comfortable armrest for Li Yu'an to lean on.
Li Yu'an did not refuse, but enjoyed this tenderness. "What shall we talk about?"
Yan Cen asked the question that he had not been able to figure out before. "How did you get my old WeChat account?"
Li Yu'an took a breath and said frankly, "I had already changed my major at that time. My former roommate said that Professor Liu Yi gave you his WeChat account in class, and I couldn't help but add him."
Yan Cen guessed that this was the case, "Sure enough."
That year, Professor Liu Yi was ill, and Yan Cen, as his favorite student, received a request from him, inviting him, a senior, to help his juniors in the same major.
Yan Cen couldn't refuse the professor's request, so he agreed.
From that day on, his WeChat account was passed on from one person to ten, and from ten to a hundred, and countless juniors and juniors joined him.
Yan Cen would not show "dislike" in front of outsiders, especially since he had promised the professor in advance. Even though he knew that some people added WeChat for no academic advice, he still cooperated and accepted one friend request after another.
As for those who took the opportunity to confess, he naturally rejected them all.
Li Yu'an learned the truth from Yan Cen and couldn't help asking, "Then why... didn't you reply to me?"
Even though this matter could not be blamed on Yan Cen, Li Yu'an would still feel sour whenever he thought of those blessings that fell on deaf ears.
Yan Cen held his cold hand and kissed the back of it, "I didn't mean to not reply to you, but I really didn't see it."
Because there were too many miscellaneous messages, Yan Cen's daily work was delayed. Coincidentally, due to career needs, he bought a new phone card and registered a new account, adding only his family and friends such as Bo Yueming -
that is, the one Li Yu'an saw now.
As for the old card and old number, although they were not directly cancelled, they were indeed not used again.
Yan Cen thought about it and felt regretful. "I have asked my overseas friends to find the phone in the apartment where I lived before, but after so many years, I don't know if I can get back these messages."
Li Yu'an didn't expect that his lover would do this during his sleep. He was surprised and touched at the same time.
For him, these New Year's greetings he sent in the past have already been responded to in Yan Cen's love.
"It's okay. It's okay if you can't find it."
Yan Cen kissed his hair. "I will send you the New Year's greetings in the future. I will not miss them every year in the future."
Li Yu'an's heart was filled with warmth and he raised his lips. "Yeah."
Yan Cen picked up the sugar cube on the bedside table again. "Why are you still keeping this candy?"
Li Yu'an took it from his fingertips and hummed, "...Save it for later."
Yan Cen thought of the other three candy wrappers. "Are you so reluctant to part with it?"
Li Yu'an nodded. "Reluctant, it's all about thinking about it."
That year, Li Yu'an received the first candy from Yan Cen, and he relied on that little sweetness to endure for a long time.
Until one time he couldn't hold on any longer, he peeled off the candy that he had treasured for a long time.
It's a pity that the candy was a little too old and tasted a little sticky.
Even so, Li Yu'an still cheered up little by little with the sweetness.
Li Yu'an glanced at Yan Cen and muttered, "If it weren't for the two times when I had a fever, you would have peeled off the candy wrapper for me and I would have kept it." Yan Cen
's heart was filled with just a few simple words. He thought about it and decided to coax him, "Yu'an, can I eat this candy?"
"..."
Li Yu'an didn't agree.
Yan Cen simply peeled off the candy wrapper for him and bit into it in front of him.
Li Yu'an couldn't stop him in time and said aggrievedly, "Yan Cen, mine!"
"Stingy."
Yan Cen laughed and lowered his head to kiss him.
The sweetness spread in an unexpected way, causing Li Yu'an's heart to beat.
It ended with a kiss.
The breath of the two people blending together was still sweet.
Yan Cen took out a candy that he had prepared long ago from his pocket and handed it to his palm to compensate him, "I will give you a candy every day in the future, and try not to repeat it. If you like the candy wrapper, you can keep it, but don't be reluctant to eat it."
Li Yu'an was a little moved.
He never liked the taste of glutinous candy, but the candy given by Yan Cen.
Yan Cen rubbed his nose, "Is it okay, Mr. Li?"
Li Yu'an squeezed the new candy in his palm, and the end of the tone was full of joy, "Yeah."
The two exchanged another light kiss.
Yan Cen looked at the man in his arms, and his love could not be concealed, "Yu'an, you have spent almost seven years on me like this, don't you feel a loss?"
Li Yu'an shook his head.
Secret love is a one-sided gamble, and he never thought about winning from the beginning.
"But I feel a loss."
Yan Cen gave a completely different answer, with a wave in his eyes, "When you were asleep, I thought a lot about how to make it up to you, but no matter how hard I thought, I couldn't go back to the past."
"So, I'll try another way, okay?"
Li Yu'an's heart suddenly moved, "What?"
Yan Cen held his fingers tightly, seriously and affectionately, "I'll use my whole life to make it up, as long as you don't let go, I will never let go, believe me this time?"
If it were someone else, Li Yu'an might have suspected that this was an empty promise that could not be believed, but now the person who said this was Yan Cen.
Li Yu'an looked at the chips pushed in front of him, which belonged to Yan Cen's entire fortune.
"Okay."
When the east wind changed, he became the banker.
He traded seven years for a lifetime, and he made steady profits.