34. Probability and Love
"Lingling! Help! I'm in trouble at work again! I need your shelter!" Lingling received this message from Hao Shengnan in her attic apartment around 8 p.m. As usual, she'd ordered a late-night snack and waited for Hao Shengnan to arrive. As soon as he entered, he kicked off his shoes, dumped his oversized shoulder bag, and ran barefoot to the sofa, where he plopped down on the floor and ate the skewers piled on the coffee table. Ling Ling followed her and sat cross-legged on the floor, leaning against the sofa, opened a can of beer and handed it to her, "What's wrong with you? My knowledge limits my imagination, and I don't know what other mistakes you can make." Sheng Nan took a big sip of beer and said, "Isn't our supervisor always like a chief steward, running to the office area for inspection every time it's time to get off work? Then I wanted to complain in the private chat group set up by a few good colleagues, and I said, 'Chief steward Zhou has started his inspection again. Those who haven't left work at the appointed time, please stand up and be castrated.' The result--" "What was the result?" Ling Ling took a sip of beer, waiting for her shocking revelations. "The result--I sent it to the large group of the entire department..." After Sheng Nan finished speaking, he slumped on the edge of the sofa, like a goldfish that had died of lack of water, with bulging eyes, big and lifeless. Ling Ling was really choked to death by her words. As soon as she caught her breath, she pushed her hard and scolded: "Hao Shengnan, you are too much! Cynicism also requires a track. No matter how resentful you are, just fight it secretly. People like us who have no background and no family resources can't just say that we don't want to do this and quit. You posted such an insulting joke, which is just empty talk. How can I stay in your unit in the future!" Shengnan took another sip of beer helplessly and said dejectedly: "Oh, yes, I am also devastated! If that guy had a common surname like Zhang, Wang, Li, or Zhao, I could pretend to be stupid and say he was talking about someone else, but he had to be surnamed Zhou. He is the only one in our entire unit with the surname Zhou! WeChat's group functionality really needs improvement. Things like departmental groups are just for receiving notifications and chatting. I'm a total novice and would never speak in them. WeChat should develop a 'ban me from speaking in this group' feature, allowing users to choose. There are so many tragic incidents of accidental messages every year, ruining so many promising futures! Ling Ling rolled her eyes at Sheng Nan and said, "You, forget about your future and focus on your present. After all, you're a state-owned enterprise. No matter how unhappy Mr. Zhou is, he'll still play along and save face. You don't need to pretend..."
"Ling Ling! Help! I'm in trouble at work again! I need to go to your shelter!"
Ling Ling received the message from Hao Shengnan in her attic apartment around 8 p.m. As usual, she had ordered a late-night snack in advance and was waiting for Hao Shengnan to arrive.
As soon as Shengnan entered the room, he kicked off his shoes, threw away his huge shoulder bag, ran to the sofa barefoot, sat down on the floor, and chewed the skewers on the coffee table.
Ling Ling followed her and sat cross-legged on the floor, leaning against the sofa. She opened a can of beer and handed it to her, "What's wrong with you? My experience limits my imagination. I don't know what other mistakes you can make."
Shengnan took a swig of beer and said, "Doesn't our supervisor always act like a housekeeper, coming to the office to inspect it every time it's time to leave work? Then I wanted to complain about it in the private chat group set up by a few good colleagues. I said, 'Master Zhou has started his inspection again. Anyone who hasn't left work by the time the deadline comes, please stand up and get castrated.' And then—"
"What's the result?" Ling Ling took a sip of beer and waited for her shocking revelations.
"As a result - I sent it to the department-wide group..." After Sheng Nan said this, he slumped on the edge of the sofa with his arms and legs spread out. He looked like a goldfish that had died of dehydration, with bulging, big, and lifeless eyes.
Ling Ling was so choked by her words that she barely managed to catch her breath. She pushed her hard and cursed, "Hao Shengnan, you're being too much! Even cynicism has its limits. No matter how resentful you are, just keep it to yourself. People like me, with no background or family background, can't just say I don't want to do this and quit. You've posted such an insulting joke, and you're just being boastful. How am I going to work in your company in the future?"
Sheng, feeling hopeless, took another sip of beer and said dejectedly, "Oh, yeah, I'm devastated too! If that guy had a common surname like Zhang, Wang, Li, or Zhao, I could play dumb and say he was talking about someone else. But he had to have the surname Zhou. He's the only one in our entire unit with the surname Zhou!"
WeChat's group functionality really needs improvement. For example, departmental groups are just for receiving notifications and chatting. I'm a total lurker and would never speak in them. WeChat should develop a 'ban me from speaking in this group' feature, allowing users to choose. There are so many tragic incidents of accidental messages every year, ruining so many promising futures!
Ling Ling rolled her eyes at Sheng Nan and said, "You, stop thinking about your future and focus on your present. After all, you're a state-owned enterprise. No matter how unhappy Mr. Zhou is, he'll still try to be polite and consider his reputation. You don't need to play dumb. He'll be even dumber than you and won't mess with you openly.
As for his idiotic behavior behind his back, specifically guarding the place after work and not letting anyone leave, you're definitely not the only one who can't stand it. Anyone who does something like that must be narrow-minded and petty on a daily basis, and it's likely to have already infuriated everyone. Anyway, you've already completely hurt him beyond repair, so why not target those in your circle who oppose him and build more alliances? That way, if someone ever needs to weigh in on your personal decision to stay or leave, at least there'll be someone to defend you.
Your boss's job rotation is five years, so he probably only has less than two years left. Just keep working hard and get by."
Ling Ling helped Shengnan think of a solution logically, and Shengnan's anxiety finally eased, and he finally started enjoying his barbecue. Then she went back to fiddling with her phone, socializing in various WeChat groups.
"Has the bloody wound you just had healed so quickly? You went to the group to talk nonsense again and were browsing other apps at the same time. Be careful of account corruption and social ruin!" Ling Ling warned her.
Shengnan's eyes still didn't move away from the phone screen. "Oh, I just like playing with my phone! If I die before you, you must remember to install Wi-Fi on my grave and renew my subscription every year."
Ling Ling rolled her eyes and responded, "Okay, okay, Master Hao, I'll take note of it."
Seeing Ling Ling agreed, Sheng Nan looked at her with tenderness and affection, and said in a coquettish voice, "My dear lady, you are my lucky star. If only I were a man, I would do everything in my power to marry you."
Ling Ling glanced at her chest and said sarcastically, "Your figure is quite like a man's."
Shengnan puffed out his chest in dissatisfaction and retorted, "It's not just my body shape that's manly. I drink a lot, have promiscuous sex, enjoy photography, slack off at the company, and can even punch people. Aren't these all manly?"
Ling Lingmiao praised her answer, and the two of them burst into laughter.
After laughing enough, Shengnan returned to his serious demeanor and asked her, "But let's not always talk about the stereotypes of men. If you find a good man, he's a rare animal, so don't miss him. For example, your Yu Chuanbei, how are you two doing now?"
"The two of us?" Ling Ling wasn't mentally prepared to be mentioned together with Yu Chuanbei. She squinted her eyes, as if reminiscing about the distant past. "The two of us... haven't been in touch for several months."
"What? Broke up?" Sheng Nan slammed the big green stick on the coffee table in shock. "That's impossible. The last time I saw Yu Chuanbei, his eyes were sincere and persistent towards you. He wouldn't give up on you so easily."
Ling Ling gulped down her nearly empty beer. "Hey, we've never been together, so how can we talk about breaking up? You say, I'm unemployed and wandering around a wildlife park, I bump into someone, and then I drag him out for dinner, and that person is my Mr. Right - the probability of this happening is probably even lower than being struck by lightning on the street. And he, on the other hand, is perfect in every way. He doesn't need God to send him to a woman with a gift package. He just needs to go to that place and countless women will flock to him. He is impeccable, and the story of our meeting is like a dream. Just these two points make me feel guilty and uneasy."
Shengnan, however, totally disagreed with Lingling's idea and said bluntly: "You are so twisted that you actually use probability to analyze love. Yes, it is true that your analysis is extremely clear and logical, but, well, it's unnecessary. Low-probability events happen, and you dare not touch them; high-probability events happen every day, and you are unmoved. Then what's the point of living? Living is just to fight against the enemy and to block the water. A man named Yu Chuanbei appears in your life, and you happen to like him, and you hit it off, so just have sex, that's all." Shengnan's view on love has always been so straightforward.
"I don't want to be so casual." Ling Ling was still stubborn about her feelings. "If I want to fall in love, I have to be serious, everything must be right, and he's the only one I can be with. As for Chuan Bei, I won't start easily without complete confidence. He is indeed good in every way and he likes me very much, but I just don't want to throw myself at him just because he beckons me. His admiration is not a favor. Even if I do have feelings for him, I don't want to be grateful. He likes me, and I don't dislike him, so should we be together? I don't want to."
"Even if I miss it?"
"Yes, even if I miss him! What's more, if I miss him, it means that my original choice was correct and he is not mine at all."
"Bullshit theory! Asshole logic! Lingling, your parents gave birth to you so beautiful, but your slim waist and perky butt are wasted. At your age, you are still a virgin, God is really blind. Besides, you have to admit that you always despise Yu Chuanbei's sense of superiority in his background. Then, can you guarantee that your sense of superiority in your relationship here and now has nothing to do with his persistent pursuit?" Shengnan scolded without any concealment.
Ling Ling did not resist. She sighed in acceptance and nodded.
Seeing her pity, Sheng Nan continued, "There are 7 billion people in this world. Even if you're a spinning socialite, the number of people you'll meet is extremely limited. Even among them, the ones you'll find attractive and worth your while are even fewer. If you insist on using probability, you should consider the probability of this situation. You shouldn't just throw yourself into Yu Chuanbei's arms, fight him for 300 rounds, and then feel like you wasted too much time."
"Master Shengnan, sex is not everything in life! Most of the time in people's lives is in a sexless state." Ling Ling was still stubborn and pedantic.
"That's why the time we spend together is so precious! Between men and women, sex isn't everything, but it's absolutely impossible to live without it." Sheng Nan said, feeling frustrated. "Forget it, I'm too lazy to waste my breath on you. You're still at the stage of whether or not to start your first love, so make the decision yourself. Although I still have my eyes on you and Yu Chuanbei."
"I'm afraid I'll disappoint you. He and I haven't been in touch for several months. I guess he has a new relationship." Ling Ling said this in a muffled voice.
"You are kidding me! You didn't seize the opportunity to cultivate such a good seed player! If you don't want to enjoy it, you can hand it over to me!" Sheng Nan yelled at Ling Ling, spraying a cumin smell at her.
"You're crazy!" Ling Ling pushed her away.
The two of them kept talking about the bottom line like a rubber band all night long.
Author's Note
Liu Qiu
author
04-02
I'm feeling down today, with some sad things happening in my life. But I feel fortunate to have some wonderful readers who are saying such warm words. Thank you.
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