86. First impression of Dr. Zhong
When Zhong Mingtong appeared at the ward door, Ling Ling couldn't help but take in his observation: tall, slender, with delicate, fair features, silver-rimmed glasses, and a scholarly air. In the bright white operating room of a Beijing tertiary hospital, reeking of disinfectant, he'd look like the heroine in an idol drama. But now, he gave the impression of someone who'd spent half a century working in the countryside. His skin, flaky from sunburn, his untrimmed beard scraggly and untidy. His jeans looked like they hadn't been washed in a while, and his khaki backpack must have once been an elegant white. Of course, she wasn't much better off: she'd rushed out of the office and hadn't brought any clothes. She'd only returned to her old house once to find some clothes from high school to change into. She hadn't showered in three days, and her hair was as greasy as the sideburns of Empress Dowager Cixi. "Hello, Dr. Zhong, I'm Ling Ling. Thank you for rushing over to see my brother," Ling Ling greeted politely. Zhong Mingtong nodded slightly. "You're welcome. Mr. Yu asked my colleague to tell me the general situation. I also do this kind of work in the next city, and I'll do my best to help." Ling Ling thanked him gratefully and led him to Ling Letong's bedside. After disinfecting his hands, he conducted a medical examination and interview, then went to Ling Letong's attending physician's office to review his recent test results and current treatment plan. Ling Ling had been listening from behind him. Although she didn't understand much of the medical terminology, she understood the general meaning: her brother was still beyond help. All she could do now was to alleviate his suffering and try to make his passing as dignified as possible. Ling Ling couldn't bear to listen any longer. She quietly withdrew and walked back to the ward, her mind replaying the words her cousin had said to her uncle and aunt the year she took the college entrance examination: "Lingling must go to college! If you don't support her, I'll go out and work to support her education! Lingling is talented, and we can't let her be buried in this shabby village." Her cousin's words at that time were the only ray of warmth in Ling Ling's icy days. But until now, she still didn't think she had any talent, and she always felt indebted to her cousin for betraying his trust. She walked into the ward, and Ling Letong sat up. He had heard that an outside doctor would be coming to see him today, and he was trying hard to look better. "Lingling, how much will this doctor from Beijing cost to see me this time?" Ling Letong asked cautiously. "Brother, didn't I tell you it's free? My boyfriend, Yu Chuanbei, helped me hire him. Doctor Zhong is currently doing a volunteer activity at our place..."
When Zhong Mingtong appeared at the ward door, Ling Ling couldn't help but take in his observation: tall, slender, with delicate features and silver-rimmed glasses, he exuded a scholarly air. In the bright white operating room of a Beijing tertiary hospital, reeking of disinfectant, he would have been the hero of an idol drama. But now, he gave the impression of someone who had spent half a century working in the countryside. His skin was flaky from sunburn, his untrimmed stubble was scraggly, his jeans looked like they hadn't been washed in a while, and his khaki backpack might have once been an elegant white.
Of course, she herself is not in a much better situation now: she left the company in a hurry and didn't bring any clothes with her. She only returned to her old house once and dug out some of her high school clothes to change and wash. She has not had a place to take a shower for three days, and her hair is as greasy as the sideburns of Empress Dowager Cixi.
"Hello, Dr. Zhong, I'm Lingling. Thank you for coming here to treat my brother." Lingling greeted politely.
Zhong Mingtong nodded slightly. "You're welcome. Mr. Yu asked my colleague to tell me the general situation. I also do this kind of work in the next city. I will do my best to help."
Ling Ling thanked him gratefully and took him to Ling Letong's bedside. After disinfecting his hands, he conducted a medical interview and physical examination, and then went to Ling Letong's attending physician's office to see the latest test indicators and current treatment plan.
Ling Ling had been listening behind him. Although she didn't understand many of the medical terms, she understood the general meaning: her brother was still beyond saving, and all she could do now was to reduce his pain and try to let him leave in a dignified manner.
Lingling couldn't bear it any longer. She quietly withdrew and walked back to the ward. Her mind kept turning to what her cousin had said to her uncle and aunt the year she took the college entrance examination: "Lingling must go to college! If you don't support her, I will go out and work to support her education! Lingling is talented, and we can't let her be buried in this shabby village."
Her cousin's words at that time were the only ray of warmth in Ling Ling's cold days. But until now, she didn't think she had any talent, and she always felt guilty for betraying her cousin's trust.
She walked into the ward and Ling Letong sat up. He heard that a doctor from outside would come to see him today, so he forced himself to be alert and look better.
"Lingling, how much will it cost for this doctor in Beijing to treat me this time?" Ling Letong asked carefully.
"Brother, didn't I tell you? It doesn't cost any money. My boyfriend Yu Chuanbei helped to hire him. Dr. Zhong has a volunteer activity near our house recently." Ling Ling wondered why he asked again.
Ling Letong smiled slyly and said, "I haven't forgotten. I was testing you on purpose. If someone lies, after being questioned several times, they'll eventually tell a different story and be exposed. Now it seems like everything you said was true."
Ling Ling glared at Le Tong in reproach. He was still the funny brother who loved to think about things.
"It seems that Yu Chuanbei is not bad. I feel relieved that there is someone in this world who can take care of you."
Gazing at her brother's loving eyes that seemed to be telling him his last words, Ling Ling couldn't help but feel a pang of sadness. She picked up the thermos and poured warm water into it while deliberately changing the subject: "Where's my sister-in-law? She hasn't come to see me in the past two days since I've been here."
Ling Letong said awkwardly, "She went on a blind date."
Ling Ling angrily slammed the water cup back on the table. Seeing her like this, Le Tong had to comfort her, saying, "I have been in poor health for the past two years, and she has suffered a lot. She married me hoping to live with me forever. No one wants to get divorced after getting married, let alone become a widower. It was her mother who instigated her, and we just got divorced. I don't blame them. She made plans early, and I'm relieved. I've always wanted to discuss this with you - this house in our hometown was left to your father and mine by our grandparents. Now they are all gone, and I will be too, and you don't come back often, so why not leave it to your sister-in-law? I will tell her in advance, and if you want to visit our hometown in the future, she will definitely let you in."
"It's okay to do as you say. Of course I won't argue with you." Ling Ling turned her back to him and tidied up the bed that had already been made.
"There is still some money in my bank card. I transferred it to your account when you went out with Doctor Zhong just now. It was originally your money. I have been a burden to you all these years. It is not easy for a girl like you to struggle alone in Beijing, and you have to keep sending money home for my medical treatment... Don't be sad after I'm gone. It will be a relief for both you and me." Ling Letong talked a lot today and was a little exhausted. He lay back on the hospital bed, looking out the gray window with a haggard face.
"I'll go out and get some hot water." Ling Ling picked up the kettle on the bedside table and walked out of the ward quickly.
She walked a little further away, and in the corner of the bathroom, she was finally able to cry out loud.
Hearing footsteps behind her, she quickly wiped her tears and turned around. It turned out to be Zhong Mingtong.
"I'm sorry... Doctor Zhong, I..." Ling Ling's voice was still choked with sobs, and she didn't know what to do for a moment.
Zhong Mingtong said in a soft and steady voice, "It's okay. Being a patient's family member puts a lot of pressure on you. You can vent your feelings anytime. Let's talk about your brother's current situation tomorrow."
"No, let's do it now. It's okay with me." Ling Ling took a deep breath, quickly adjusted her state, and waited to hear his conclusion.
Zhong Mingtong hesitated for a moment, then said, "Ling Letong's condition is indeed not optimistic. The malignant tumor in his liver has spread to other organs. Given his current physical condition, surgery is no longer possible. The doctor can only increase the dosage of painkillers to alleviate his symptoms. In his final days, please spend more time with him and help him fulfill some of his wishes."
Hearing these words, Ling Ling's tears fell again. "Then chemotherapy won't work? Are there no other conservative treatment options? Are there any new drugs still in the experimental stage? I agree to give them to my brother. Or how about an autologous liver transplant? I can go for a matching. What if it's successful? Otherwise, could you please help me arrange for a hospital transfer? I want to take my brother to Beijing for treatment. The equipment in this small county hospital is not good enough, and the measured indicators might not be accurate..."
"Ling Ling—" They were still unfamiliar with each other, and this was the first time Zhong Mingtong called her name like that. He simply wanted to put an end to her frantic arrangements as quickly as possible. "Given your brother's physical condition, he can no longer endure the fatigue of being transferred to another hospital."
"But...but he is my only relative in this world now! If my brother dies again, I..." Ling Ling couldn't say any more. She cried helplessly. She knew that she shouldn't lose control like this in front of the doctor. She had to cover her face with her hands and said "I'm sorry" to Zhong Mingtong one by one.
Zhong Mingtong listened to her sobbing apology and saw her fair and delicate hands trembling slightly in front of him.
When it got dark, Zhong Mingtong left the county hospital and checked into a nearby hotel. He told Ling Ling that if she needed him, she could call him anytime to come over.
In the middle of the night, Ling Letong was in severe pain. Zhong Mingtong rushed over after hearing Ling Ling's message, "Don't worry, we will find a way to make your brother feel less uncomfortable."
Ling Ling said with tears in her eyes, "The doctor just gave my brother morphine, but he keeps vomiting."
Zhong Mingtong took a look at Ling Letong's condition and said, "His body isn't adapted to morphine. I'll ask the hospital to give him pethidine, but only if his family agrees."
Ling Ling nodded helplessly, tears falling, "Brother, can you survive tonight?"
Ling Ling looked at him pleadingly with tearful eyes. He knew what answer she wanted, but he couldn't go against his professional ethics and coax her: "No professional doctor will give a patient a time limit for life or death. All we can do is to do our best to treat him and accompany him well."
Ling Ling nodded again in understanding.
After the injection of Demerol, Ling Letong fell into a peaceful coma. Ling Ling stayed by his bedside, listening to his increasingly weak breathing and feeling his hands slowly turning cold, purple, and hard. Ling Letong ultimately did not survive the night.
To Zhong Mingtong's surprise, Ling Ling didn't burst into tears and grief. Instead, she stayed by Ling Letong's bedside, holding his hand and talking to him, recounting stories from their childhood and things that happened between her and her colleagues at work, until Ling Letong took his last breath.
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