Chapter 55: Begging her to abandon this family.
Mu Tingyu had been tormented for two nights in a row, and she was already angry, so this was a good opportunity to vent her anger.
Moreover, she genuinely disliked Xing Ze constantly controlling her. She was used to a free and unrestrained life and to making her own decisions, disliking interference from others.
She has her own thoughts and her own set of behavioral logic. Whether right or wrong, it's all the way of life she's figured out that's best for her. If life is constantly filled with "don'ts" and "can'ts," what's the point?
But she also knew that most of the time Xing Ze was disciplining her for her own good, so except when she really couldn't stand it and threw a little tantrum, she would usually tacitly allow him to interfere with her.
Today's remarks were quite suggestive of using the topic as a pretext for further discussion.
Xing Ze is an extremely perceptive person; he can sense her emotions. If he sees her pretending to throw a tantrum, he'll continue to lecture her. If he sees her genuinely angry or anxious, he'll gently coax her in a low voice. In short, no matter what, he has her completely under his thumb.
But this time, Xing Ze didn't say anything, he just looked at her quietly.
Mu Tingyu's hand was still raised in mid-air, her fingers almost poking his chin, her arrogant attitude had not subsided.
She was puzzled by his reaction, blinked, and tried to pull her hand back first.
But as soon as she made a move, he grabbed her.
Mu Tingyu tried to pull, but couldn't budge it; his strength was considerable.
She immediately cried out in pain, "Be gentle, you're hurting me..."
Xing Ze looked at her confident and fearless demeanor, his expression remaining indifferent.
Mu Tingyu finally realized something was wrong and tilted her head to ask him, "...What's wrong?"
Xing Ze lowered his eyes and slowly asked, "Home?"
"What?"
She didn't understand: "What...home?"
Xing Ze slowly repeated, "This family...you're in charge."
Mu Tingyu blinked: "What? Can't I make the decisions?"
He looked at her and asked calmly, "Is this your home?"
"......."
Mu Tingyu was stunned.
Raindrops pattered down from the eaves, splashing onto the open ground in front of the door. The ground was soaked, and small puddles formed in uneven areas, constantly being pounded into tiny pits by the raindrops.
The air was heavy and quiet. Her hand was held awkwardly in Xing Ze's palm, unable to move.
"......."
Mu Tingyu observed his expression and realized he wasn't joking, so she slowly bit her lip and said weakly, "...Okay, okay, I've been saying it before. It's your house, okay?"
Xing Ze didn't answer, he just looked at her.
Her eyelashes fluttered, and she couldn't help but look away, muttering to herself in a seemingly casual tone, "So petty. All I did was disobey you, and now you won't even let me talk about home. I won't say anything more, okay..."
After saying that, she angrily tried to pull her hand away, but it wouldn't budge.
Xing Ze held her tightly, his eyes deep, and asked, "Do you consider this place your home?"
Mu Tingyu paused in his breathing.
"......"
She was silent for a while, then her eyes crinkled, and her smile faded slightly: "I told you, it's just that I'm used to saying it."
Xing Ze persisted, "Have you gotten used to saying that? Besides this place, where else do you consider home?"
"......."
—He did it on purpose.
The shepherd listened and was convinced.
This man is clearly looking for trouble.
He knew perfectly well about her background and the terrible life she had led before, yet he still asked her such questions.
She suddenly felt a tightness in her chest and forcefully pulled her hand away, saying, "Let go of me."
Xing Ze stepped forward and hugged her waist tightly, ignoring her struggles: "Do you remember when you first called this place home?"
Mu Tingyu tried to pry his hands off, but his forearm was firmly wrapped around her waist, and she couldn't move an inch.
She gritted her teeth slightly: "I don't remember."
“When you come back from Xiaoping’s house, tell me you’re coming home for dinner.” Xing Ze pulled her into his arms, his voice clear in her ear.
"You said it many times afterward."
Mu Tingyu took a breath; the air was thick with humid heat, and her chest felt tight.
She asked in a hoarse voice, "So?"
Why bring this up out of the blue?
Xing Ze leaned down and hugged her, his cheek close to her ear: "...Do you really consider this place home?"
Three similar questions in a row, each one horribly jarring.
Mu Tingyu didn't understand what was wrong with this man, why he was arguing with her over words like this.
Yes, she knew this was his home.
She has no home, she is all alone. There is someone she loves here, someone she loves very much. This person makes her feel warmth like never before, and she also likes this place. So she selfishly considers this place as her home. Is that not allowed?
What did he mean by asking that? Did he feel he wasn't qualified?
Mu Tingyu felt extremely embarrassed, as if someone had reopened a wound. She took a deep breath and said, "I told you, I just said it offhand."
Xing Ze fell silent.
"What exactly are you trying to say?"
Mu Tingyu clutched his shirt tightly, her voice low.
"Am I not allowed to say it?"
Are you going to start holding me accountable from the very first time I said that?
"......."
The person in his arms instantly turned into a little hedgehog, fiercely raising the quills on their backs, but their body trembled slightly, as if they were trying their best to control their emotions.
Xing Ze gently touched her neck and whispered, "I'm sorry, that's not what I meant."
"...So what do you mean?"
"......"
He frowned, but his hands kept moving, gently stroking her again and again.
Mu Tingyu dodged, saying, "Don't touch me." Xing Ze's hand froze in mid-air, so he put his arm around her shoulder and coaxed her by whispering in her ear, "This is your home, so I'll do whatever you say."
But she wouldn't listen and pushed him away, saying, "No! Get away from me!"
Xing Ze's eyelashes trembled, and he tightened his grip.
He's the one who's frustrated and anxious, why is he taking it out on her?
He frowned in annoyance and apologized to her in a low voice, "I'm sorry."
Mu Tingyu was hurt by his words and remained silent with red eyes.
Although she usually has a smile on her face and seems to care about nothing, this is an exception.
Did he think he would just casually make a place his home?
Xing Ze realized he had said the wrong thing and apologized to her again and again.
He watched the girl stubbornly turn her head away, sulking, and felt a pang of bitterness in his heart.
What kind of answer does she want to hear?
Yes, of course it's your decision. I like you so much, of course I'll listen to you in everything.
If you want, this whole house is yours.
His throat felt like it was blocked by a hard, choking lump, and all he could swallow was bitter water.
But she didn't want it; she didn't want his home.
She said it was just something she said offhand.
She was a little liar; she said a few sweet words to him, making him yearn for her, and he was so attached to her that he couldn't bear to stay in her house even a little longer.
Even though there were still more than two weeks left, she was already impatiently preparing to leave.
Did she come here just to amuse him?
Xing Ze closed his eyes bitterly, turned his head away, and bit her lip as if to punish her.
Mu Tingyu was still angry, and pushed him away with her hand while keeping her mouth tightly shut.
Her lips were being licked heavily, the man's lips and tongue burning hot, his touch intensely possessive. But for some reason, the breath on her face trembled almost imperceptibly.
He seemed to sense her resistance and became agitated, pinching her chin rather roughly to force her to open her mouth.
"Hmm..."
Mu Tingyu looked up and endured it, her nose tingling and tears welling up in her eyes.
"Go away...go away...don't kiss me..."
Between breaths, she reached out and punched him hard, her voice trembling with tears.
Xing Ze endured several blows, his eyes lowered, and held her tightly in his arms.
He pressed down very heavily, and Mu Tingyu lost her balance, so she reached out to brace herself against the wall.
Immediately afterwards, she felt Xing Ze's broad and warm palm cover her hand, and then slowly and irresistibly squeeze between her fingers, intertwining their fingers.
She couldn't help but blink, and tears uncontrollably slid down her cheeks and rolled into his collar.
"......."
"I'm sorry, don't cry..."
His hoarse voice rang in my ears.
-
Xing Ze knew he was an extremely boring person.
He lived for twenty-eight years, saw so many things and met so many people, yet he still preferred to stay by himself.
He was born with little emotion, had no aspirations in the world, and did not know the meaning of life. Since arriving here, he has been all alone, keeping only this barren and dull land as his companion.
If nothing unexpected happens, he will probably spend his whole life here.
But an unexpected event still occurred.
A little bird just flew into his little white building without any warning.
She's impulsive, boisterous, and incredibly adorable.
She looked so innocent and beautiful, enveloped in the sunshine and laughter outside, her feathers fluffy and soft, yet full of an air of freedom, completely out of place here.
Unaware of his dullness and monotony, she followed him around, chattering and skipping, intruding into his life, constantly getting closer to him, and occasionally touching his palm with her soft beak, gazing at him with her wet eyes, bringing him damp dreams all night long.
He had known all along; when she audaciously barged into the third floor and into his territory, he understood that this was a calamity.
Because she was so free, she would only glance back at him during her journey, find it interesting and fun, so she would stay with him briefly, and then continue flying forward without any regrets. No one could stop her.
Even after understanding this so clearly, he still reached out his hand without hesitation and let her fall into his palm.
Look how despicable that is.
Even though he knew she wouldn't stay, he still couldn't bear to miss even her brief moment of affection.
How he longed to open his mouth and beg for her mercy, to tell her that he had been lost for a long time and longed for her compassion.
But she just smiled, gave him a kiss, and then turned to leave.
He had nothing, and he couldn't keep her.
He searched his entire body and found only a heart that followed her as she scavenged for scraps.
He followed closely behind her, bending down to pick up a piece of her smile, a handful of the starlight in her eyes, holding them in his hands like precious jewels.
He longed to obtain something else, but then told himself that it didn't matter if he didn't get it.
What else could he possibly be hoping for?
He knew the ending from the beginning, didn't he?
-
But how could a person be without greed?
He wanted to hold the little bird in his hand and have her stay with him forever.
-
Xing Ze bent down and kissed away her tears, then tenderly kissed her lips.
Mu Tingyu's heart skipped a beat. She looked up at him, but all she saw were his drooping eyelashes and furrowed brows.
"......."
She blinked, stunned.
Xing Ze always likes to keep his eyes open when he kisses her. Every time she can't take the kiss and tries to struggle, she can make eye contact with him.
His eyelashes were long, and when he was focused on kissing, they would droop down and cover his eyes, which were dark and blurry, yet like an alluring deep pool, beckoning people to jump in.
Mu Tingyu loved looking into his eyes, because at those moments, his eyes were always filled with only her, utterly overflowing. She could clearly feel his emotions, as deep as a volcano, enveloping her like a thick fog, airtight yet providing a profound sense of security.
But this time, he did not open his eyes.
-----------------------
Author's Note: Here's one chapter for now; there will be an extra chapter today! [Pleading]
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