Chapter 23 He was just too oblivious to realize the past. ...
Mu Tingyu cried her heart out.
Her tears flowed like a dam being opened, as if she wanted to vent all the grievances and resentments she had suffered over the years, and her head started to ache from crying.
She hadn't intended to cry, but her feigned composure crumbled under Xing Ze's gentle movements and inquiring voice, leaving her no choice but to watch it crumble.
That's so embarrassing.
She thought to herself as she sobbed.
But no one ever told her, "You don't have to laugh" or "You can cry loudly."
She had no right to express her emotions in Lin Yulan's house; only by remaining obedient and silent could she avoid being reprimanded.
She can only truly be herself when she goes to the cemetery and stands before her parents' graves during the Qingming Festival each year.
At this point, her crying was understandable and had a reason; no one cared what she was crying about.
A smile is a universally applicable word; as long as you have a smile on your face, even the most difficult person will feel embarrassed to make things difficult for you.
Once she realized this, she got used to living with a smile, stepping into society and into any new field with a smile, attracting a large number of people who admired her smile.
But now, someone is telling me, "You don't have to smile."
She secretly filled out a college application from a place thousands of miles away, bidding farewell to the days of relying on others, and from then on, she would take charge of her own life.
She forced herself to jump off the cliff, using the fear of being shattered to force herself to fly, but now she is allowed to be vulnerable, allowed not to be stubborn all the time.
When her tears finally broke free, she knew what emotion was in Xing Ze's eyes: heartache.
It turns out that all she had been longing for was this one sentence—a sentence that would allow her to let down her guard and have a good cry.
-
She wiped her tears on Xing Ze's shirt, choking back sobs as she said, "My nose... my nose is running..."
Xing Ze's helpless voice rang in my head: "You're holding me, I can't reach the tissue."
Mu Tingyu withdrew her paws from his shoulder, and he leaned over to take the whole pack of tissues and handed it to her.
She drew a few bills and then, quite unceremoniously, blew her nose.
However, she probably doesn't have much of an image in Xing Ze's mind anymore, so it doesn't matter.
She pulled out a few more bills and handed them to him, sobbing pitifully, "Your...your clothes are wet..."
Xing Ze looked down at her.
The girl's eyes were red-rimmed, her eyelashes were wet, and there were still tear stains at the corners of her eyes.
He sighed, took the tissue from her, and wiped away her tears: "Did you cry it out?"
Mu Tingyu obediently tilted her head back, squinted her eyes and let him wipe her eyes, and hummed softly.
Xing Zezai carefully wiped away the tear stains on her face and then pinched her nose.
He put the tissue aside, stared at her misty eyes, and waited until her sobs subsided and she slowly came to her senses before speaking in a deep voice.
"The clothes weren't given to you for nothing by crying."
"So, what happened?"
Mu Tingyu opened her blurry eyes, opened her mouth, but didn't know how to speak.
She thought for a moment and asked, "Sometimes, do you ever find me a little annoying?"
Xing Ze reached up and pressed his brow, looking rather helpless: "...What kind of question is that?"
"If I found you annoying, I would have told you to go back to sleep a long time ago. What are you doing making a fuss here?"
Mu Tingyu had just cried and was now extremely vulnerable; upon hearing this, her eyes drooped.
"Tsk," Xing Ze reached out and pinched her red nose, "No, what's bothering you?"
"Well, I've caused you a lot of trouble..." Mu Tingyu looked at him expectantly, "I'm actually quite good at taking advantage of you, aren't I? I eat at your house every day without cooking or washing dishes, and you still have to worry about everything for me. I feel like I owe you a lot..."
Xing Ze frowned more and more as he listened, and couldn't help but poke her forehead: "What nonsense are you thinking about now?"
Mu Tingyu was startled by his poking and quickly grabbed the corner of his clothes.
Xing Zeyou wasn't satisfied and reached out to pinch her cheek: "You teach the children in the village, so you shouldn't have to worry about anything. I don't want you to cook or wash dishes, and I'm happy to worry about you. As for owing me..."
He narrowed his eyes, his tone dangerous: "Mu Tingyu, who gave you permission to have such thoughts?"
Mu Tingyu sighed and stammered, "Is it...not allowed?"
"No," Xing Ze warned her in a deep voice, "Don't even think about it."
"As for taking advantage of me," he looked down at the hem of his clothes, which was twisted into a pretzel again, "I don't mind, go ahead and take advantage."
Tears welled up in Mu Tingyu's eyes again, and she sobbed, "You're so good..."
Xing Ze: "......"
Why would I suddenly get friend-zoned at this time?
He pulled out a tissue to wipe her tears, a slight headache on his face, still worried about her: "So what exactly happened?"
Mu Tingyu sobbed, clutching her head, "My head is so dizzy, did I drink too much? I'm so dizzy..."
"Don't change the subject." Xing Ze grabbed the back of her neck. "I told you, my clothes weren't given to you for crying."
"I...I'll wash you..."
“No.” He coldly refused.
Mu Tingyu felt his hand rub against the back of her neck, the rough texture of his calluses sending shivers down her spine.
She was forced to straighten up to avoid the hand, and suggested in a low voice, "How about we watch a movie... Didn't we say we were going to watch a movie? Where are we on the show?"
Xing Ze remained unmoved: "What's so interesting about something so boring?"
"No, wasn't this the movie you chose?"
Xing Ze looked down at her: "—You really thought I called you over just to watch a movie?"
As soon as she finished speaking, Mu Tingyu suddenly realized that the two of them were actually very close.
Xing Ze's breath fell on her face as he spoke, carrying a familiar, warm, and moist osmanthus fragrance that lingered around her nose.
—It smelled exactly the same as the aroma she had smelled after the kitchen lights were turned off that night.
Xing Ze's gaze was deep and intense, like a spring filled with scorching water.
Her eyelashes fluttered, and she subconsciously lowered her gaze.
She reached out and gently pushed him, but he wouldn't budge.
"......"
Was he this close that night too?
What was he thinking at that time?
But the next second, the romantic thoughts in her mind were shattered by Xing Ze's cold words: "Speak quickly."
"......"
Mu Tingyu's cheeks were burning, but fortunately, she was flushed from drinking, and the lighting was dim, so it shouldn't be noticeable.
She touched her ear: "It's just some family stuff."
Xing Ze asked, puzzled, "Is it related to your parents?"
"No, um... my aunt called and asked me for money."
How much do you want?
"Four hundred thousand."
Xing Ze frowned: "You gave it to me?"
"No," Mu Tingyu said, feigning nonchalance, "I gave them two hundred thousand."
"..." Xing Ze looked at her, and didn't say anything for a moment.
Seeing his expression, Mu Tingyu reached out and tugged at his sleeve: "It's okay... anyway..."
Do you have any left in your own hands?
"Huh?" Mu Tingyu was taken aback, then nodded blankly. "There's still a little bit left."
Xing Ze helplessly raised his hand to pat her head: "I thought you were so stupid that you didn't even save money for yourself when you ate. Are you on good terms with your aunt? She gives you money just because she asks for it?"
Mu Tingyu frowned: "This is not good."
She slapped Xing Ze's hand away from her head and muttered, "Don't touch my head."
Xing Ze withdrew his hand, looking at her somewhat sullen expression, and found it amusing.
After crying, she seemed to have become bolder and dared to vent her anger on him.
A hint of a smile played in his eyes as he asked, "Then why give her the money?"
"To pay off debts."
Xing Ze didn't understand: "What debt are you asking me to repay?"
The girl's eyes were still red: "I'll pay her back the money she spent raising me, so I won't owe her anything."
What does this mean?
Xing Ze frowned, realizing that things weren't as simple as he had imagined—a relative borrowing money.
"She supports you?" he asked. "What about your parents?"
Mu Tingyu hugged her knees and watched him quietly.
"They are dead."
Xing Ze was jolted, and all the words he wanted to say were stuck in his throat.
After a long pause, he finally managed to speak: "...When did this happen?"
"When I was seven years old," Mu Tingyu said calmly, as if she were recounting something that had nothing to do with her.
He died suddenly in a car accident.
“We don’t have a house, and our elders have all passed away. At first, no relatives were willing to take me in—maybe they thought I was a burden. After all, at this age, I’m about the age where I can remember things, so they can’t raise me as their own child. I was really happy when she took me in.”
"Later, I wasn't particularly happy."
The girl sat with her knees drawn up to her chest, the light projected onto the wall reflecting off her face, leaving dappled and ever-changing shadows.
Her eyes were clear and bright, like crystal prisms, able to see any vibrant color.
When Xing Ze first saw her, he thought her eyes were very beautiful.
Like a little animal that has never experienced the world, she possesses an innate purity and cheerfulness. After getting to know her, I discovered that this is indeed her personality.
Happy and joyful, like an optimist who never has any worries.
But he didn't know how Mu Tingyu survived in the world when she was seven years old and had no relatives or friends.
He spoke in a hoarse voice, "Why are you unhappy? They're not nice to you, are they?"
Mu Tingyu nodded: "Mm."
She didn't say anything more, but that one word in her answer was enough to make Xing Ze unbearable.
He didn't understand why anyone would treat her badly.
He cherishes such a beautiful and lovely girl, and he feels he can't hold her in his hands enough. Why would anyone treat her badly?
At the age of seven, when he was still building sandcastles in the sandpit, little Mu Tingyu was already living a life of dependence on others.
What will she face? Cold shoulders, or exclusion? Will she have enough to eat and wear? Xing Ze's throat tightened, and he asked, "What about what you said the other day about going home for the Mid-Autumn Festival...?"
"Let's go to my parents' graves," Mu Tingyu said casually. "That's not my home."
Xing Ze finally understood why she looked so forlorn when she talked about "returning home under the full moon".
Because she simply didn't have a home to return to.
She never mentioned these things to him, but there were signs all along, but he was too oblivious to notice.
Xing Ze felt a pang of bitterness in his heart. He clenched his fists tightly, barely managing to suppress the urge to pull her into his arms.
She has lived in this world for so long without any relatives or friends. The people who raised her did not treat her well. She may not even have the opportunity to vent or confide in anyone, yet she still lives so well.
They lived such a vibrant and cheerful life.
She has become the kind of person he can't take his eyes off once he sees her.
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Author's note: Brother Xing: Don't wipe your snot on my clothes.
Tingbao: Eek.
Brother Xing: ...Damn it.
(-ω-｀) Just spoil her.
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