Chapter 12 Litchi, I wish you would sleep with me.
She really couldn't understand why Zhou Jinbai had such feelings for her. When did it start?
During the three years that she and Zhou Zexi were married, she had almost no contact with Zhou Jinbai. Even if she did not notify him to go back to Zhou's house to rest, they rarely met. She usually hid in her room and did not go out, or she was at her parents' home.
She would only stay at Zhou's house frequently when Zhou Zexi was at home, but she had not seen Zhou Jinbai many times.
Why does he like her?
Or does he still have unspeakable feelings towards her even though he knows she is his daughter-in-law?
Su Li's mood was tense and complicated. She struggled on his back for a few times, "Put me down."
Zhou Jinbai didn't let go and said in a deep voice, "Don't move. If you move again, we'll both fall down, and you'll be happy."
Su Li, "..."
Su Li is not heavy, but as an actress, she always has to maintain her figure. She pays great attention to body management. She is 1.68 meters tall and her weight has always been maintained at around 90 kilograms.
Zhou Jinbai still had the strength to carry her, but Su Li was a little worried because he was old and still had to walk on such a snowy mountain road.
But Zhou Jinbai refused to let her go, and she had no choice but to stop struggling.
She did not answer Zhou Jinbai according to his words. She remained silent. She looked calm on the surface, but she was not calm at all in her heart. Only she knew how fast her heart was beating.
After her heart resumed beating after a moment's pause, it felt so impatient that it couldn't be stopped. She didn't know why, was it because of nervousness or shame.
There was no way she would agree to Zhou Jinbai, even if Zhou Jinbai didn't care that she had been married to Zhou Zexi, but she did care.
If she got together with Zhou Jinbai, she would not be able to explain their relationship to her parents, and they would scold her to death.
Moreover, she makes a living in the entertainment industry, and her relationship with Zhou Zexi will be made public sooner or later. She has already thought about how to deal with it. If her relationship with Zhou Zexi is thoroughly exposed, she will at most be scolded by Zhou Zexi's fans, and will not be labeled with any shameful labels.
But if she divorces Zhou Zexi and chooses to be with his father, then it would not be surprising that she would be drowned in spit for the rest of her life.
How could a daughter-in-law be with her father-in-law after a divorce? Even though Zhou Jinbai wasn't Zhou Zexi's biological father, after so many years, their relationship was stronger than that of a biological father and son.
Just like Zhou Zexi said, "I will never leave my dad in my life. No matter how he beats me or scolds me, I will never get angry with him. I know how difficult it has been for him to get here, and I know he has suffered a lot for me. If there is anyone in this world that I can't let go of, it must be my dad."
At that time, Su Li felt that she was not important in Zhou Zexi's heart. The most important person in his heart was Zhou Jinbai. She was a sensible person and would not make trouble unreasonably. She also understood what Zhou Jinbai meant to Zhou Zexi.
So she also respected Zhou Jinbai very much. Even though she was afraid of him, she would greet him with a smile and call him "Dad" when she saw him.
Because of Zhou Zexi, she also regarded Zhou Jinbai as a strict father and a serious elder.
But this elder now said to her, "Lizhi, I really like you."
Su Li calmed herself down and felt the biting cold of the north wind, which hurt her cheeks a little. She turned her face slightly to the side.
It was the first time I called his name to his face.
"Zhou Jinbai."
Zhou Jinbai's voice remained flat.
"explain."
"I really can't promise you. Although I don't know when you fell in love with me, I will never set my sights on you in this life. You are still young and you can find any girl you want. There are many girls prettier than me in this world. Look at Zhou Zexi, he found someone who is both young and beautiful."
Zhou Jinbai did not answer her.
This time, Su Li really rejected him formally.
"If we didn't have that kind of relationship, I would probably consider you. I think you're actually a pretty good person, at least much better than Zhou Zexi."
He interrupted her.
"Don't say these things first, let me tell you about my past."
"Your past?"
"Yes, I haven't told anyone about my past, including Zhou Zexi. I don't think you understand me. Let me tell you about my past, and then you can make a conclusion."
Su Li didn't say anything else.
Zhou Jinbai walked very slowly, pushing her up from time to time.
"I'm an orphan, Litchi."
“…”
"I don't know when I was sent to the orphanage, but I've been there since I can remember. I told you I have a sister."
"Yes, you said it, a sister who depends on each other for survival."
"That wasn't my biological sister. She was my only support in the orphanage. Throughout my childhood, I was surrounded by beatings and verbal abuse. I had endless chores to do and was beaten every day. No one sympathized with me or helped me. Only my sister would help me."
Su Li's heart sank.
"Is the orphanage so dark?"
"Although not all orphanages are like this, it's true that children without parents and no one to rely on do have a hard time. My sister was also an orphan, but someone later wanted to adopt her because she was sensible and good-looking. An elderly couple took a fancy to her and wanted to adopt her, but she refused because she wanted to take me with her."
Su Li didn't know what to say.
Zhou Jinbai's voice is low and calm.
"I originally thought she would have a chance to escape from the cage. Staying in the orphanage means she has endless things to do. The time she normally spends studying, she spends doing the dirty work with me. I hope she can find a good family who treats her well."
"Then my sister wasn't adopted?"
"No, she turned down the adoption offer from that couple and was originally planning to wait for me. But she was beautiful and had blossomed into a beautiful young lady since she was fourteen. The dean was a pot-bellied old man in his fifties, and he fell in love with my sister."
“…”
"My sister was only fifteen at the time. He wanted my sister to sleep with him and stay in the orphanage and not go anywhere else."
"Isn't that a beast? Why didn't you call the police?"
"We couldn't call the police. Our lives were controlled by them. He threatened my sister with my life to make her submit."
Su Li's heart began to get nervous again.
"Did she agree?"
"Well, she agreed."
“…”
"But I refused. It was winter, and it was very cold at night. I saw my sister coming out from next door late at night, so I got up and followed her, pretending to go to the bathroom. As soon as I left, I saw that fat pig holding my sister. I was so angry that I didn't think about the consequences. I took the iron hoe used for weeding at the door and hit the man on the head. One hit wasn't enough, so I hit him ten times."
“…”
"The man's head exploded. I was young at the time and was terrified. My sister cried, and I cried too. I thought he had killed someone, so my sister ran away with me that night."
“…”
"She is the only warmth I have in this world. I feel like I can go anywhere with her as long as we are together."
"But why did she give birth to Zhou Zexi with someone else? Doesn't she like you?"
Zhou Jinbai shook his head.
"She only treated me as a younger brother and had no feelings for me. Besides, I was three years younger than her. My hair had barely grown back then. What could I possibly like?"
“…”
"From then on, we lived a wandering life, without a goal or a home, often living in abandoned parks and under bridges. Later, when we saved some money, she wanted me to go to school, saying that if I didn't, I would be a wanderer for the rest of my life. Why should I go to school when we couldn't even support ourselves? I didn't want to go to school."
Su Li remained silent.
Zhou Jinbai felt a little tired, and Su Li patted his shoulder.
"Take a break."
Zhou Jinbai then slowly squatted down, put her down, let out a long sigh, and sat next to her.
Her hair was messed up by the north wind. Su Li looked at him and he met Su Li's gaze.
"But she was later deceived by an older man in order to get me into school. She was only seventeen years old that year, the prime of a girl's youth. She became pregnant with Zhou Zexi. I didn't know anything about it, and neither did I. I didn't know she was pregnant until her belly started to grow."
“…”
"But the man has disappeared without a trace. People around him say he's married and has moved away with his wife and children."
“…”
"My sister got pregnant with Zhou Zexi and didn't have the money for surgery, so she decided to give birth to the child."
"So was Zhou Zexi born with a difficult labor?"
"Yes, that was the most desperate day of my life. I wanted to take her to the hospital, but we both had no money. I wanted to ask someone for help, but I didn't know who to ask. She told me not to look, and I didn't understand, but I knew it was dangerous. I went out to find someone to help her, but no one would help. They were all strangers."
Su Li could already imagine the tragic scene.
Zhou Jinbai lit a cigarette, took a puff, and spoke calmly.
"When I found an aunt who was willing to help, she was already dead when I came back. The aunt called an ambulance for me, but she died before she even got to the hospital."
“…”
"She left me and Zhou Zexi behind and passed away. I was devastated. The hospital even had to deal with her ashes. I couldn't even find her a grave. I was so poor, I had no money. I scattered her ashes in the river."
Although Su Li did not live a very wealthy life, she seemed to have never lacked anything since she was a child. Her parents were both there, so she didn't know how to comfort her.
She didn't say anything.
Zhou Jinbai's cold eyes looked towards the distant mountains.
"Later, the hospital called the police. They didn't know what to do with Zhou Zexi, a child. I refused to let them take him away, so I just kept at a stalemate until they sent Zhou Zexi and me back to the orphanage. I was beaten up after we went back, but in order to take Zhou Zexi away, I stayed in the orphanage until I became an adult, still doing all the dirty and tiring work. After I became an adult, I took Zhou Zexi away. I swore that I would never let Zhou Zexi become an orphan like me."
"So all these years of hard work and dedication were for him."
"Yes, if it weren't for him, I might have gone with my sister on the day she died."
Su Li sighed.
"Alas, Lao Zhou, even if you tell me all this, it won't change my mind."
Zhou Jinbai's voice was cold and indifferent.
"You don't have to change your mind. I just want to tell you about my past so you know what kind of person I am. I know that no man in this world is good. As a man, I also hate men."
“…”
"I originally thought that when Zhou Zexi was no longer in the entertainment industry and had started a family, I would leave all these businesses to him and let him work hard on his own. I would find a place to live out my retirement in peace and quiet, regardless of what the outside world said."
"What now?"
Zhou Jinbai turned his head to look at her.
"But there was an accident."
Su Li panicked and quickly looked away.
"You can pretend I don't exist."
Zhou Jinbai chuckled.
"I really just wanted to treat you as my daughter from the beginning. If you hadn't divorced Zhou Zexi, I would never have done such an outrageous thing in my life."
“…”
"But you and Zhou Zexi are divorced, and you won't get back together. I saw an opportunity and took the initiative. You think I'm compensating you for Zhou Zexi, but that's not the case. Those are all things I wanted to give you. I've never been nice to anyone in my life. When I became rich, my sister had already passed away many years ago."
Su Li couldn't figure it out, so she turned her head to look at his profile.
Zhou Jinbai's profile is very striking, with clear edges and corners, and a high, straight nose.
His slicked-back hair was messed up by the cold wind.
"Old Zhou, when did you fall in love with me? When Zhou Zexi and I were still married?"
Zhou Jinbai twitched the corners of his lips, lowered his head and extinguished the cigarette holder in the snow.
He admitted it generously, "Well, you and him have been married for almost half a year."
Su Li, "..."
Zhou Jinbai also knew that this was outrageous and challenged Su Li's moral bottom line.
But he explained, "But I never got close to you. When you were at home, you hid from me, but I pretended not to see you. Anyway, there was no possibility between us. I didn't look at you. I controlled myself."
Su Li's heart was beating like a drum, and her eyes were avoiding where to look.
"What do you like about me? Because of this face?"
"Who knows what I like about you? I just like you."
“…”
"When there was no chance, I didn't get close, I didn't take the initiative, I suppressed myself to death. Anyway, I've come through all these years. If I can handle the first forty years, I can handle the next forty. But when I finally got the chance, you rejected me. My life is really full of regrets."
Su Li lowered her head, drooped her eyelashes, and blinked.
"Since you like me, you can definitely like others. Ask Lao Zhang to introduce you to some girls of my age."
"What do you take me for? In your eyes, I'm anyone, right?"
Su Li exhaled softly.
"It would have been nice if you had known me earlier, before I met Zhou Zexi."
"Is it just Zhou Zexi who made you lose the courage to love? But one thing is certain, I did know you much earlier than Zhou Zexi."
Su Li was stunned, not quite understanding what he meant. When had she met Zhou Jinbai? She had no memory of it at all.
She thought for a moment and shook her head, "You are different from others."
Zhou Jinbai asked, "What's the difference? We're all men. What do they have that I don't?"
Su Li, "..."
That's not what she was talking about. Of course she knew that all men were the same.
But Zhou Jinbai’s identity is different.
Su Li felt tongue-tied, so she simply stopped talking and lowered her head to look at the snow beneath her feet.
Zhou Jinbai asked again, "Is there really no chance?"
Su Li hummed and said nothing more.
Zhou Jinbai nodded, "Okay, then I'll leave tomorrow. The adaptation rights for this work were hard-earned. If you can perform well, then your future in the entertainment industry will be smooth sailing. Perform well."
Su Li thanked him, "Thank you."
Zhou Jinbai didn't say anything else. He called Zhang Qingchi, sent him his location, and asked him to find someone to bring Su Li down the mountain.
As soon as Zhang Qingchi arrived, he noticed that both of them were in a bad mood, so he asked a few men to help Su Li down, while he talked to Zhou Jinbai from behind.
"What's going on?"
"I fell down."
"I'm asking about the situation between you and Su Li. Didn't the deal work out?"
"Um."
"What should we do then?"
"Just give up, what else can I do?"
"I don't understand why she resists you so much?"
"There are some things I can't tell you, so don't ask."
"Well, Lao Zhou, you're old enough to want to blossom, can't you change your partner? There are so many actresses in the crew, don't you like any of them?"
"I just like her, and I can't live without her."
"Okay, I'll figure it out."
“…”
"I can't let my big money sponsor be wronged. This little girl Su Li is really annoying."
"Don't do anything to hurt others."
"Don't worry, I know what to do."
Lin Youqin originally wanted to meet Su Li to see her acting skills, but Zhang Qingchi said that Su Li was a little inconvenient today because she was injured.
What’s even more dramatic is that Zhou Jinbai went out for a while and came back with a cold.
Su Li avoided Lin Youqin's test, but failed to avoid Zhou Jinbai's test.
Zhang Qingchi brought Zhou Jinbai, who was unconscious with a high fever, to her and told her, "Sleep well tonight. I just gave him some fever-reducing medicine. Please take care of him. There are too many people on the crew, and he has nowhere to go. The accommodation is full, so I had no choice but to send him here."
Su Li, "..."
Zhang Qingchi helped Zhou Jinbai onto the bed, covered him with a blanket, and brought a kettle over. He then told Su Li, "If he wakes up, give him some boiled water."
Su Li said "oh" and said nothing more.
Zhang Qingchi went out and closed the door for her. Su Li had just finished washing up and her right foot was still painful. She sat on the edge of the kang and looked at Zhou Jinbai who was sleeping peacefully. She finally felt discouraged.
"That old bastard Zhang Qingchi, did this on purpose, right?"
Regardless of whether it was intentional or not, she couldn't bear to see Zhou Jinbai get into trouble.
I got out of bed, wrung out a wet towel, and put it on his forehead. I had never seen Zhou Jinbai's face up close, but when I looked closer, I found that his eyelashes were very long, casting a shadow on his lower eyelid.
Zhou Jinbai has very handsome facial features. Even though he is forty years old, there are no wrinkles on his face and his skin is not sagging. If you close his cold eyes and look at him again, he has a kind of calm and indifferent handsomeness.
Su Li panicked and looked away, feeling a little strange. Why was she looking at Zhou Jinbai's appearance for no reason?
It's not like she hasn't seen it before. She told herself to focus on her own affairs. She didn't have that kind of thoughts about Zhou Jinbai.
After reading the original novel of "The Merchant Daughter of the Qin Family" for a while, and analyzing the character of the heroine Qin Hao in depth, Su Li turned off the lights, lay down by the wall, and kept a certain distance from Zhou Jinbai.
It was freezing cold, and I felt sleepy as soon as I got into the warm bed.
But Su Li was afraid that Zhou Jinbai would wake up, so she was drowsy and didn't dare to fall asleep, but later she couldn't resist the sleepiness.
Probably in the second half of the night, it might have been snowing outside. Su Li heard a rustling sound. She suddenly woke up and wanted to know if Zhou Jinbai's fever had subsided. As soon as she opened her eyes, she felt someone holding her.
All the pores on Su Li's body seemed to be blocked in an instant. She opened her eyes wide in the darkness and moved tentatively. The man behind her was pressed tightly against her back.
Su Li swallowed nervously and tried to break free. Zhou Jinbai's hoarse voice came from behind her, "Awake? It's still early, go back to sleep."
Su Li's body stiffened. She didn't dare to move or speak.
Zhou Jinbai's face was on the back of her neck, and she could feel his warm breath.
Probably knowing that she was awake, but without responding, Zhou Jinbai said again, "Don't be nervous, I'm leaving tomorrow."
Su Li exhaled slowly, "Your fever is gone?"
He hummed, "I'm old and useless. I catch a cold if I get a little cold. I can't compare with young people."
Su Li didn't answer, and tried to pry his hands off her waist, "Don't get so close to me."
Zhou Jinbai's voice was cold and indifferent, "It's okay if you don't let me hug you. I won't bother you anymore. Just let me kiss you twice."
Su Li, "..."
Zhou Jinbai asked in a deep voice, "You gave me so much money, but you can't even let me kiss you twice? No one will know anyway, Litchi."
Su Li felt like her heart was about to explode, "Get out."
Zhou Jinbai didn't move, and tightened his arms around her waist. "A father-in-law and daughter-in-law are both sleeping in the same bed, how can there be innocence? Even if you don't do anything with me, everyone knows that I'm here with you tonight."
Su Li, "..."
Zhou Jinbai's voice was very soft, "In order to prevent future troubles and no longer have this kind of trouble, a kiss in exchange for a peaceful life, isn't it a good deal?"
Su Li took a deep breath, suppressing the tension and suffocation in her heart, "Why are you like this?"
He asked, "How? I've never kissed a woman before, let me try."
Su Li, "..."
Zhou Jinbai, "After trying this, I will never contact you again."
Su Li's heart was about to jump out of her chest. Although it was snowing heavily outside and the weather was freezing cold, it did not affect the warmth here at all.
The tattered window paper crackled in the cold wind, and the film and television base was desolate.
Su Li remained stiff for a long time. After hearing Zhou Jinbai's words, she calmed down and mustered up the courage to say, "Then you have to keep your word."
Zhou Jinbai's lazy and calm voice came from the back of his neck, "Well, I always keep my word."
Su Li asked him to let go, "I can't turn over like this."
Zhou Jinbai let her go, and Su Li sat up from the bed and prepared herself mentally.
Although she has never filmed a kissing scene since entering the entertainment industry and has only kissed Zhou Zexi, if she wants to pursue a career in the entertainment industry in the future, kissing scenes will definitely be indispensable.
In the past, a body double was used for kissing scenes because Zhou Zexi didn’t like her doing kissing scenes, so she never kissed the male actors.
Tonight she would just treat Zhou Jinbai as an actor. Sooner or later she would have to film kissing scenes with various male actors and be watched by a group of people.
It’s just Zhou Jinbai. The cultivation of a good actress is to be able to talk down to all kinds of male actors. Otherwise, how can she survive in the entertainment industry?
She has to learn to let go.
She relaxed her tension.
"Zhou Jinbai."
"Um?"
"Don't regret it."
"What do I regret? I wish you had slept with me, otherwise I would remain a virgin until I die."
“…”
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