Chapter 63 "Lu Yu...My heart aches..."
"Clear..."
Lu Yu's voice was hoarse. He didn't dare to use any force, so he just gently stroked the back of Lin Che's cold hand with his fingertips. "Turn around, let me see you, okay?"
Lin Che's body stiffened slightly, but he didn't move, still standing with his back to the camera.
He buried his face in the scarf, and the loose hair hanging in front of his forehead completely covered his eyes.
"Baby……"
Lu Yu called out again, his tone more humble and distressed than ever before. He tried to grasp Lin Che's wrist, trying to gently turn him around.
This time, Lin Che finally reacted.
He turned around very slowly, his face still buried deep in the soft smoky gray scarf, most of his face was covered, revealing only a little bit of pale skin and a pair of eyes completely covered by the shadows of his hair.
Lu Yu could only see his tightly pursed, bloodless lips.
It was a silent, complete rejection and closure.
Lu Yu took a deep breath, forced down the soreness in his throat, and whispered coaxingly, "Let's go home, okay? It's cold outside. When we get home, I... I'll warm your hands."
He made the promise awkwardly, feeling powerless.
Lin Che remained silent, as if he hadn't heard his words, and still kept his head down. Just when Lu Yu thought he wouldn't respond again, he moved very slightly.
He didn't look at Lu Yu, but stretched out his still cold fingers and gently pulled the cuff of Lu Yu's expensive shirt.
"Where's your coat?" Lin Che's voice was muffled by her scarf, with a low, hoarse, and heavily nasal tone.
This brief inquiry was like an amnesty, which instantly relaxed Lu Yu's tense nerves.
He immediately replied: "In the office! Wait for me here, I'll be right there!"
He was afraid that Lin Che would regret it, "Just one minute! Cheche, don't go away, wait for me!"
After receiving an almost invisible nod from Lin Che, Lu Yu strode back to the office.
When Lu Yu reappeared in the corner of the rest area, panting, he saw Lin Che still standing there, with his head buried in his scarf and facing the window. Lu Yu's heart, which had been hanging high in his chest, finally settled back down.
At least, Lin Che didn't leave.
"Put it on." Lu Yu unfolded his coat and carefully draped it over Lin Che's shoulders. He carefully gathered the lapels, and his fingertips accidentally touched Lin Che's cold neck, causing him to feel distressed again.
Lin Che turned sideways and took off the coat that Lu Yu had put on. She hunched her neck slightly, burying herself deeper into the scarf and her own breath. Her nasal tone was even stronger than before, and she said muffledly, "It's quite cold outside. You should put it on."
Lu Yu's hand fell into nothingness and he stood there in a daze, his heart, which had been hanging in the air, was lifted up again.
All the way in silence.
The heater in the car was on full blast. Lin Che kept looking out the window with his head tilted to the side, his face still wrapped in a scarf. Only the occasional flutter of his eyelashes proved that he was still awake.
Lu Yu tried to speak several times, but his throat seemed to be blocked by something. All his explanations and apologies seemed pale and powerless in the face of the other party's dead silence.
He could only stretch out his hand and tentatively cover the back of Lin Che's still cold hand.
Lin Che's fingers curled slightly under his palm, not pulling away, but also not responding.
The suffocating silence continued to spread until the car drove into the villa garage and the engine was turned off.
Lin Che was the first to push the door and get out of the car. His movements were a little stiff. He didn't wait for Lu Yu and walked straight to the door.
Lu Yu closed the door right after him. As soon as he took off his coat, he saw Lin Che standing in front of the coat rack.
Lin Che's movements were slow, but exceptionally clear.
He first raised his hand and untied the tightly wrapped smoky gray cashmere scarf.
The soft fabric slipped off, finally revealing his pale, expressionless face. His hair was still hanging messily, covering some of his eyebrows and eyes.
Then, he silently took off the jacket of his heavy down jacket, his movements methodical and almost obediently ritualistic.
Like a programmed robot that had completed its instructions, he turned around quietly and looked at Lu Yu.
His eyes were empty, and fatigue was like a thick layer of dust, covering his once clear eyes.
"Baby, let me take a call." Lu Yu's cell phone vibrated at this moment. It was an urgent matter at the company.
He glanced at the screen and said to Lin Che helplessly and anxiously, his voice very soft and soothing, "It will be quick, just two minutes."
Lin Che didn't say anything, just looked at him quietly and nodded.
Lu Yu immediately picked up the phone, walked to the floor-to-ceiling window in the living room with his back to Lin Che, lowered his voice, and handled the matters on the other end of the phone at a very fast speed, just wanting to end it as soon as possible.
"...Okay, I got it. I'll deal with it tomorrow morning. That's it." The phone was finally hung up.
Lu Yu turned around almost immediately and wanted to walk towards Lin Che.
However, the moment he hung up the phone and turned around, Lin Che had already rushed over. Lu Yu subconsciously reached out to catch Lin Che who had jumped into his arms.
He didn't even see how Lin Che moved. He just felt his vision darken, and lips with a familiar breath pressed up with irresistible force.
Lin Che was half a head shorter than Lu Yu. He almost stood on tiptoe, with his face tilted up. He grabbed the collar of Lu Yu's shirt with his hands in a panic and kissed him hard.
He licked Lu Yu's lips randomly, and bit Lu Yu's lower lip clumsily and stubbornly with his teeth, trying to pry open his teeth.
Lu Yu was completely frozen, his mind going blank.
He could clearly feel the subtle trembling of Lin Che's body, and could sense that the kiss contained no passion, only confusion and pain.
He subconsciously opened his mouth to say something, but Lin Che blocked it back even more forcefully.
This position was obviously very strenuous for Lin Che. He tried to stand on tiptoe, his body leaning forward slightly due to the effort, but it was still difficult for him to reach the target.
He suddenly released his hand that was grabbing Lu Yu's collar, then used all his strength to push the defenseless Lu Yu back.
Lu Yu was caught off guard and was pushed, staggering a few steps, his back sinking heavily into the soft sofa.
Before he could even sit still, Lin Che, like a cornered beast, pounced on him with a biting coldness and sat directly on his legs!
"Che..." Lu Yu cried out in surprise, and subconsciously raised his hands to support him.
Lin Che didn't give him a chance to speak. He leaned over and roughly grabbed the intact buttons on the top of Lu Yu's shirt with both hands.
It wasn't about untying it, but rather pulling it hard with almost tearing force.
Two priceless mother-of-pearl buttons flew off in an instant, landing somewhere unknown. Lu Yu's muscular chest and collarbone were exposed under the open collar.
Lu Yu was completely stunned. He could only hold Lin Che's waist and hips stiffly and firmly to support him and prevent him from slipping off his legs. He became his only fulcrum at the moment.
Lin Che's kiss fell again.
This time, the target was no longer the lips, but was heavily imprinted on Lu Yu's exposed neck and collarbone.
It was more like using teeth rather than kissing, with an almost self-abuse cruelty, leaving a series of purple and red marks on Lu Yu's fair skin. There were even traces of blood that seeped out when Lin Che bit the skin without restraining his strength.
A sharp stinging sensation came, and Lu Yu groaned, but did not resist at all.
He hugged Lin Che tightly, feeling her violent trembling, and the hot, wet, and salty taste of tears biting her neck. He let the pain spread across his skin, but the overwhelming panic and heartache in his heart never stopped.
Lin Che's teeth sank deeply into Lu Yu's fair collarbone skin, leaving a clear bloody mark.
He raised his head, and big, hot tears slid down his pale cheeks and fell heavily on Lu Yu's exposed chest.
The temperature of the teardrop was incredibly hot, leaving a mark on the surface of Lu Yu's violently beating heart.
Lu Yu even had the illusion that he heard a subtle "sizzling" sound, as if a hole was burned through his heart, leaving an invisible scar that could never be filled, which was a hundred times more painful than any bite mark on the skin.
Lu Yu's gaze was fixed on Lin Che's face, and those eyes soaked with tears almost drowned him.
Lin Che suddenly straightened her back on him, leaned forward slightly, and pressed her lips gently and almost reverently against Lu Yu's.
The lips separate as soon as they touch.
Lin Che's voice was low and broken, each word trembling slightly as he struggled to squeeze it out from his tight throat. His gaze fell on the bleeding tooth mark on Lu Yu's collarbone. "Does it hurt?"
Lu Yu's heart was gripped tightly by these words, and was squeezed out of shape.
He shook his head almost immediately, his voice hoarse, nasal and urgent: "It doesn't hurt, baby."
He raised his hand and gently brushed the corners of Lin Che's wet eyes with his fingertips. "It doesn't hurt at all."
More tears rolled down Lin Che's cheeks. He looked at Lu Yu, and every word he said carried a bloody weight, like a rusty, blunt knife, cutting into Lu Yu's heart.
"Lu Yu...my heart...hurts..."
A statement that was so calm that it was almost dead, frightened Lu Yu more than any hysteria.
"Baby……"
Lin Che didn't respond in Lu Yu's arms, her body still trembling slightly, like a broken doll with all the life sucked out of it. Her tears soaked Lu Yu's shirt and burned his skin.
Lu Yu took a deep breath and stood up, holding Lin Che in his arms. Lin Che's body was so limp that she had no strength left. She let him hold her, her head leaning weakly on his shoulder, warm tears streaming down Lu Yu's neck.
Lu Yu placed Lin Che on the big bed, pulled the cashmere blanket over the bed and carefully wrapped Lin Che up, leaving only a furry head and a pair of wet eyes exposed.
"Will you listen to me and tell me slowly, okay?" Lu Yu gently wiped the tears from the corners of Lin Che's eyes with a tissue. At this moment, his emotions had calmed down a lot, and Lu Yu breathed a sigh of relief.
Lin Che buried his face in the wool blanket and murmured "hmm" in a muffled voice.
Lu Yu knelt on one knee on the soft carpet in front of the bed, his eyes level with Lin Che, who was buried in the wool blanket with only a pair of eyes exposed.
Lu Yu took a deep breath and organized his words, carefully considering each word, striving to make it clear and truthful, without any ambiguity that might irritate Lin Che again.
"The man in the office just now," he began, his tone as steady as possible, but when he mentioned that man, a hint of cold disgust flashed across his eyes uncontrollably, "His surname is Zhou, and his name is Zhou Mingxuan."
Lu Yu paused, observing Lin Che's reaction. Lin Che just looked at him quietly, her red and swollen eyes expressionless.
"His father, Zhou Guodong, has been a long-standing and stable supplier of our group. We've primarily been collaborating on building materials for nearly a decade. So, this Zhou Mingxuan is nominally... a nephew who I've known for a long time and with whom I've had business dealings."
He specifically emphasized the words "business" and "nephew", and his intention to draw a clear line between them was very obvious.
"This afternoon, he called my office and said he had something important to discuss, something about financing for a new project at his company. He couldn't explain it over the phone, so he hoped to talk in person."
Lu Yu frowned slightly and continued, "His father did mention this project to me in advance, saying that he would let his son follow up. I didn't think much of it, thinking it was just a normal business report. After all... we've been working together for so many years, so I still have to give his father face."
Lu Yu's voice lowered, carrying an indescribable fatigue. "So, I asked him to come up. When he came in, he behaved normally and reported on the project status in an orderly manner."
He paused, his Adam's apple rolling. "...halfway through the report, he suddenly leaned forward and said he wanted to show me the details of a supplementary document. I was completely caught off guard! I thought he was just going to hand me a document! But..."
"Baby," Lu Yu's voice was extremely hoarse and nasal. He reached out and gently grasped Lin Che's still cold hand, which was placed beside him, through the thick wool blanket. "Every word I said is true. I swear. Apart from the business relationship with his father, he and I have no private connection at all! I don't even have his phone number saved! Before today, I almost forgot he existed!"
Lu Yu's voice choked and his eyes turned red again.
He lowered his head and gently rested his forehead on the wool blanket wrapped around Lin Che, "I'm sorry, Cheche... I'm really sorry..."
He repeated it over and over again, his voice muffled by the blanket, choked with suppressed sobs, "I've wronged you, and made you... feel hurt... It's all my fault."
The room fell into silence, with only the sound of Lu Yu's heavy and suppressed breathing.
After an unknown amount of time, Lin Che, who was wrapped in a wool blanket, moved very slightly.
Lu Yu raised his head suddenly, only to see Lin Che's red and swollen eyes still looking at him. His long eyelashes drooped weakly, covering most of his eyes. His lips moved slightly, as if he wanted to say something.
Lin Che's slender fingers landed on Lu Yu's red eyes, touched them lightly, and then retracted them.
He looked directly into Lu Yu's eyes and said word by word, "I thought...you didn't want me anymore."
At this moment, Lu Yu understood everything completely.
For Yu Linche, the glaring scene in the office was more than just a misunderstanding, a moment of jealousy, or an embarrassing thing to witness.
It was an old scar that had been buried deep in his heart and had never healed that was torn open bloodily—the huge fear rooted in childhood of being "abandoned," "not being chosen," and "always being replaced."
What Lin Che saw was not simple workplace harassment, nor was it Lu Yu's possible failure.
What he saw was that the love he had finally opened his heart to, the love he had carefully held in his hands, was being coveted by others, and might even be... taken away.
This instantaneous shock activated the most primitive fear deep in Lin Che's soul: he was going to be left behind again.
This is the source of his “heartache”.
It was a fear of being abandoned that was engraved in his bones. It was completely ignited at that moment, overwhelming him and almost swallowing him up.
That pain, far exceeding any jealousy or anger, is about the collapse of the foundation of existence.
Therefore, Lin Che's sense of security was never truly established.
Lu Yu's heart felt like it was being gripped by an ice-cold hand, causing him so much pain that he couldn't breathe. He looked at the pair of eyes under the blanket that were still red and swollen, and filled with deep fatigue and fragile dependence.
He knelt on one knee and leaned forward. He did not wipe Lin Che's tears again. Instead, he stretched out his arms and, through the thick wool blanket, once again, used all his strength to hug Lin Che tightly and firmly in his arms.
What he needed to do was not to make another promise, but to use actions, day after day, to rebuild the sense of security that he had inadvertently shaken and on which Lin Che depended for survival.
"Silly..." Lu Yu's voice was low and hoarse, with a strong nasal tone, but it was extremely clear, and every word seemed to be engraved in his bones and blood. "How could I not want you?"
His chin rested lightly against the top of Lin Che's head, feeling the subtle trembling of the person in his arms.
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