Chapter 55 The Madman [VIP]
Chapter Summary: But Fu Xianyin, I still feel that I am not just anyone.
The voice was very soft.
It was so light that Fu Xianyin even wondered if she was hallucinating again.
After Gu Linzhao helped her pick up her pen, he returned to his seat. On the podium, the proctor had already counted the rows of papers, waiting for the bell to ring.
Fu Xianyin took a few deep breaths, trying to adjust her state.
Objectively speaking, this exam wasn't actually that difficult.
But the more Fu Xianyin played, the more depressed he became.
The words on the exam paper seemed to be under a spell; Fu Xianyin had to point at each word with a pen to read them, barely managing to understand them.
A thin layer of sweat gathered on her forehead. Fu Xianyin pinched herself hard, using the pain to force herself to concentrate.
Even so, she still had to stop writing after only a short time.
"There is still half an hour left before the exam ends."
On the podium, the proctor is reminding students of the time.
There's only half an hour left before the exam ends.
But Fu Xianyin didn't even write an essay.
...
Just as I finished writing the last word, the bell rang to signal the end of the exam.
Fu Xianyin was so exhausted that she slumped onto the table, watching the teacher take away her answer sheet and her pen fall to the ground, but she didn't even have the strength to pick it up.
She couldn't remember what she wrote on the test paper, the answers to the reading comprehension questions, or the title of her essay.
She even...
It's not even certain whether she finished the test paper.
A profound emptiness and despair enveloped Fu Xianyin.
For the past two weeks, she has been trying various ways to comfort herself.
Doing practice questions for a couple of days will help you get used to it; changing your seat to the front of the class will help; you'll feel the pressure when the exam comes.
One by one, the "that'll be fine" crumbled, gradually vanished, turned into dust, and a gentle breeze blew by, leaving nothing behind.
Now, Fu Xianyin can't even comfort herself with the simple phrase, "It'll be alright."
Because she realized with absolute clarity that, no matter what, she seemed to be beyond help.
The midterm exams followed the college entrance exam schedule, with only one Chinese exam in the morning.
After the proctor left the classroom, Fu Xianyin immediately got up, packed her bag, and headed to her dormitory.
She couldn't stay there a second longer.
Everything in the examination room seemed to pity her, yet also seemed to think that she would eventually reveal her true colors.
She wanted to escape, she wanted to escape far away, she wanted to escape all of this.
By the time Fu Xianyin realized what was happening, she was already in her dormitory.
The phone was ringing shrilly. Fu Xianyin snapped out of her daze and saw the three words "Chen Huimei" flashing on the screen. Numbly, she pressed the answer button.
On the other end of the phone, Chen Huimei's voice was so calm it was almost eerie.
She immediately bombarded me with questions: "Fu Xianyin, are you in a relationship?"
The last glimmer of hope was shattered.
Chen Huimei saw the post and the discussions.
Those rumors eventually reached the people Fu Xianyin least wanted to know.
His voice betrayed his exhaustion: "I didn't, they made that up."
"Made up?" Chen Huimei's voice suddenly rose eight octaves: "You still dare to try and fool me with this?"
Fu Xianyin said, "I'm not lying to you, I'm not in a relationship."
Chen Huimei said, "No talk? If you didn't talk, why would anyone say that? Do you think I don't know what kind of person you are, Fu Xianyin? Do you think I don't understand you?"
"You're just a worthless wretch, just like your father. You can't get rid of the deep-seated bad habits in your bones."
"Not only did you date, you also lied and deceived people. If I hadn't found out myself, how long were you going to keep it from me?"
Fu Xianyin suddenly felt a little breathless.
She put down her phone, slowly knelt on the ground, clutching the collar of her shirt, and gasped for breath.
Chen Huimei did not hear her response, and her voice became even sharper:
"Speak up! Are you mute?"
"I told you I'm not in a relationship."
The moment she spoke, Fu Xianyin was startled by her own voice.
Her voice was so hoarse it sounded like she had been shouting on stage for three days and three nights.
If Chen Huimei truly cares about her, if Chen Huimei truly cares about her.
She might ask, "Why is your voice suddenly like this?"
Mother.
Fu Xianyin thought to herself.
Please, I beg you.
If you ask, I will tell you everything.
Please, I beg you.
Please, I beg you.
With her forehead pressed against the cold ground, Fu Xianyin felt as if she were crying. The dull pain in her heart continued, and she curled up on the ground in a disheveled state.
Until Chen Huimei's shrill voice came through the receiver:
She said:
"Still being stubborn, you're just as shameless as Fu Dongyuan."
Tears streamed down her face, and Fu Xianyin felt her vision gradually blurring.
She lay on the ground, using her completely exposed skin to feel the coldness of the ground.
Until consciousness began to fade.
She could still hear Chen Huimei's curses echoing in her ears:
"How could I have given birth to such a worthless wretch like you? How could I have given birth to such an ungrateful piece of trash!"
Fu Xianyin didn't know how long she had slept.
She got up in a daze, washed her face in a daze, and walked out of the dormitory in a daze.
By the time she fully realized what was happening, she was already sitting in the examination room.
The exam bell rang, and the exam paper in my hand still smelled of ink.
Looking at the difficult formulas on the white paper, Fu Xianyin suddenly wondered why she was still sitting there.
Why are they still alive, sitting here taking the exam?
Fu Xianyin felt her soul leave her body, float and hover in the air above the examination room, and then drift out of the window, flying around the school again and again.
She saw people running on the playground, some practicing relay races, and she heard deafening cheers, like waves crashing down on her, one after another, heavily and solidly.
She saw someone reading again, seemingly saying something, but this time, she couldn't hear anything.
Her soul drifted aimlessly for a moment, then returned to her body.
With a series of bizarre and surreal images still lingering in her mind, Fu Xianyin felt her head buzzing. She couldn't help but lean on the table and gag a few times.
"How are you feeling, classmate?"
The proctor's face gradually loomed larger before her eyes. Fu Xianyin opened her mouth, but no sound came out.
She simply nodded.
By the time Fu Xianyin was fully awake, a good portion of the time had already passed.
Her answer sheet was still completely blank.
At that moment, Fu Xianyin even wished she would never wake up.
But she also knew that fate would never grant her wishes.
She could only pick up a pen and start writing from the first question, one by one.
"There's one hour left before the exam ends, so be careful to manage your time."
The proctor announced the time for everyone from the podium.
Fu Xianyin's palms were already sweating. She looked at her test paper, which was mostly blank, and her fingertips trembled slightly.
In a daze, she seemed to hear Chen Huimei's voice.
It must be another hallucination. How could Chen Huimei be here?
Fu Xianyin shook her head, preparing to continue working on her problems, when a clearer voice entered her ears:
"Where is Teacher Gao? I'm looking for Teacher Gao!"
"I need to ask her, what exactly is Fu Xianyin doing at school instead of studying properly?!"
It's not a hallucination.
But Fu Xianyin preferred that it was an illusion.
Chen Huimei continued shouting recklessly, "Is this how your school teaches students? I'm going to file a complaint, I'm going to let the Education Bureau see what you teachers are doing!"
With each cry she uttered, Fu Xianyin's heart grew colder.
She could no longer hold the pen steadily, and she couldn't continue doing the problems.
Her legs were so weak that she didn't even have the strength to rush out of the classroom.
Gao Ying's voice came from outside: "Parent, please calm down. It's midterm exam time. Your loud noise will affect other students' exams. Come, let's talk in my office."
"I don't care if they have to take exams! You don't care about my daughter's grades, but you care about this bunch of useless people. Is this how you act as a teacher?!"
Clang
Fu Xianyin suddenly stood up, and the chair made a soft thud.
She walked to the podium with her almost blank answer sheet, gritted her teeth and said, "Teacher, I want to hand in my paper."
After saying that, she rushed out of the classroom.
Almost the instant she rushed out of the classroom, Fu Xianyin's legs gave way and she collapsed to the ground.
She scrambled to her feet and stumbled toward the sound.
At the top of the stairs, Chen Huimei raised her chin and pointed at Gao Ying, questioning her.
Fu Xianyin stepped forward and pressed down on Chen Huimei's raised hand.
Her voice trembled, her chest heaved violently, and her words were broken and incoherent.
She said, "Chen Huimei, do you want me to die in front of you?"
Before Chen Huimei could say anything more, Fu Xianyin suddenly erupted. With her last shred of reason, she grabbed Chen Huimei and dragged her upstairs.
Fu Xianyin was quite strong, and Chen Huimei was thin, so she had almost no chance to resist being dragged by Fu Xianyin.
Fu Xianyin dragged Chen Huimei all the way to the deserted rooftop. Pointing to the window glass, she said to Chen Huimei earnestly, "I am a piece of trash, I am garbage. I don't deserve to live in this world. You are the same as me, you have to die too."
“Let’s jump from here.”
"Fu Xianyin!" Gao Ying glared at her angrily: "What nonsense are you talking about!"
Fu Xianyin had thought she would scream and go crazy like Chen Huimei, but she didn't.
Perhaps she didn't even have the strength to scream anymore.
She simply looked at Gao Ying calmly and said, "Teacher Gao, I'm not talking nonsense."
Gao Ying felt as if her heart was being gripped tightly.
She finally understood why Fu Xianyin always looked unhappy and why Fu Xianyin was always under a lot of pressure.
With a mother like that, Gao Ying couldn't even imagine how stretched Fu Xianyin's nerves had been all these years.
It would probably break if you just touched it lightly.
But she is clearly such an outstanding and wonderful child.
Gao Ying took two steps forward, grasped Fu Xianyin's wrist, and whispered, "Teacher is here. Don't do anything foolish. Tell Teacher everything, okay?"
She looked at Fu Xianyin, whose face was expressionless, devoid of sadness, joy, sorrow, or anger.
It was like a stagnant pool of water, where even throwing a pebble wouldn't create a ripple.
After an unknown amount of time, Fu Xianyin nodded gently and said, "Okay."
She released Chen Huimei's hand. Chen Huimei's eyes were vacant as she sat down on the ground, muttering something to herself.
Gao Ying held Fu Xianyin's wrist tightly, and with her other hand she wrapped her arm around Fu Xianyin and gently patted her back.
Large tears fell, and Fu Xianyin raised her hand to wipe them away.
She asked, "Teacher, may I make a phone call?"
This idea had been in Fu Xianyin's mind for a long time.
She had always thought making this decision would be difficult, but now it seems quite easy.
Chen Huimei was mentally unstable, and she had absolutely no way to deal with her.
So she called Fu Dongyuan's secretary.
Fu Dongyuan sent people to take Chen Huimei away.
Fu Xianyin watched helplessly as the car gradually drove away from the school, disappearing little by little from her sight.
She said to Gao Ying, "Teacher, I want to be alone for a while."
Gao Ying was worried about her, after all, she had just told Chen Huimei that she was going to jump off the roof.
But Fu Xianyin insisted, saying, "Teacher, I won't die now. Even if I do die, I won't die at school."
"What are you saying?" Gao Ying scolded her, then sighed.
The two of them stayed like that for a while.
In the end, Gao Ying gave in first, asking, "Do I really have to be alone for a while?"
Fu Xianyin nodded.
Gao Ying then said, "How about we go to the small garden? Let me check you first, okay?"
Fu Xianyin raised her hand, allowing Gao Ying to check her clothes. After confirming that there were no sharp objects on her, Gao Ying said helplessly, "Go ahead, just five minutes. The teacher will come to find you in five minutes."
Fu Xianyin sat blankly on the bench in the small garden.
She didn't really know what to do; she just wanted to stay still in one place for a while.
So she just sat there quietly.
Until a familiar figure came into view.
It was Gu Linzhao.
Fu Xianyin could no longer determine why Gu Linzhao was here.
She merely opened her mouth, uttering a single syllable: "You..."
She wanted to ask how I got here, how I knew I was here.
But she didn't ask anything.
She only saw Gu Linzhao slowly squat down in front of her, his eyes meeting hers.
Then she heard him say:
“When I was playing basketball with Ye Yang at the affiliated high school, you said that if you encountered something like this, you wouldn’t want others to see it.”
"But it's Fu Xianyin."
He paused, his voice very soft, but every word resonated deep within Fu Xianyin's heart:
"I still feel that I shouldn't be anyone else."
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