Chapter 464 Yin'er and...He, Still Waiting for You
The two of them were speechless again.
After a while, Xi Yan took out the silver hairpin from her bosom and gently placed it in Helian Feng's palm:
"A hairpin should be given to your wife. I hope you can give it to the one you love most in your life, not me."
A trace of pain flashed across Helian Feng's face, and he smiled sadly, his fingertips stroking the delicate evening glory pattern on the hairpin:
"I crafted this hairpin for you myself. At that time, I was confident I could snatch you away from Xiao Nanyan, but who would have thought I would be defeated in the end? Indeed, my life has been a tragedy. I lost my kingdom and my beloved. Everything is my own fault."
He looked up at Xi Yan's beautiful and unparalleled features, as if he wanted to engrave her into his bones and blood:
"In fact, you are my sister-in-law. It would be uncomfortable for you to carry it with you."
He gently grasped the hairpin, his eyes gradually moistening:
"Xiyan, I have always wanted to hear a true word."
"What?"
Helian Feng took a deep breath, as if mustering up his courage:
"Two years ago, by the Taiye Lake, did you ever feel the slightest attraction towards me?"
Xiyan hesitated for a moment, and finally nodded slightly.
A hint of joy flashed across Helian Feng's eyes, as if he had grabbed a life-saving straw.
But Xiyan continued:
"It's just that we met in the wrong order. If I hadn't met Xiao Nanyan nine years ago, perhaps we would still have a chance. But there are no ifs in this world. Xiao Nanyan has melted into my blood and has long become a part of my life. It's difficult to withdraw. Moreover, we have Yin'er. We will be entangled together for the rest of our lives."
She paused, her voice becoming softer, but every word was piercing:
"I was attracted to you at that time because you hurt me so deeply, and you happened to appear and gave me a touch of tenderness, allowing me to find a harbor to dock temporarily."
The joy in Helian Feng's eyes gradually faded, replaced by disappointment, until it finally turned into calmness.
After a while, he nodded gently:
"I understand."
Silence spread between the two again.
After a long while, Helian Feng slowly spoke: "I'm awake now, you can go back. Yin'er and...he are still waiting for you."
Xiyan looked into his calm eyes, nodded slightly, and stood up:
"Then you should rest well. I... will leave first."
Helian Feng didn't say anything else, just waved his hand and watched her figure disappear outside the palace gate.
Until the slender figure disappeared around the corner of the palace gate, his tense back suddenly collapsed, as if all his strength had been drained away.
He looked down at the silver hairpin in his palm. The evening primrose flowers on the hairpin glowed warmly in the candlelight, and the warmth of her fingertips seemed to still remain between the lines.
But at this moment, Helian Feng knew very clearly that his relationship with Xiyan was completely over.
The evening primrose he had carved with his own hands once held all his hopes for her.
It was by the Taiye Lake, he looked at her silhouette reflecting the flowers in the water, and quietly promised to be together forever in his heart; it was in the middle of the night, he tossed and turned as he silently depicted her eyebrows and eyes through the heavy curtains; it was when the enemy was at the gates, he knew it was impossible, but still wanted to protect her behind him with all his might.
But now, she doesn't want the hairpin anymore, and his heart is dead.
The woman who once made his heart beat, made him persistent, and made him willing to give up his kingdom, eventually went to a different intersection with him and became strangers.
He slowly tightened his grip on the silver hairpin. The sharp edge hurt his palm, but it was far less painful than the empty and cold feeling in his heart.
It turns out that with some obsessions, when you let go, you don’t feel relieved, but rather an overwhelming desolation.
At this moment, he felt as if his chest was stuffed with a ball of cotton wool soaked in ice water. It was heavy and stuffy, and even breathing was painful.
The once noble Crown Prince, the fourteenth emperor of Tianqi, at this moment, a tear slipped from the corner of his eye without warning, meandered down his pale cheek, and finally dripped onto the corner of his lips.
The taste was bitter, just like his half-life struggle and obsession, which ended up in vain.
At this moment, he felt more depressed than ever before.
His father is gone, his mother is gone, his sister is gone, and even the woman he loves most has turned to someone else - what else does he have left in this world?
After living for more than twenty years, it turns out to be just a joke.
Emperor? He curled his lips in self-mockery. He had only been emperor for ten days. Was he worthy of being called an emperor? He was afraid that his brothers who had been rescued had already become the new crown prince candidates with Xiao Nanyan's support.
And he, a traitor who led his troops to force the emperor to abdicate, imprisoned the emperor and usurped the throne, was either sentenced to death or life imprisonment.
If it is imprisonment, what is the difference between it and death?
However, right now, he still had one last thing to do: he would personally bury his mother and Shu'er. Even if they had made mistakes, they were still his blood relatives. After their funeral arrangements were completed, he would die to apologize to the world and comfort the souls of those who died because of him.
As for the throne of emperor, he no longer has any attachment or obsession with it.
Even if you really sit firmly in that position and look down at the vast landscape, there is no one around you. You have lost all the people you want to cherish. All your happiness and sorrow have no one to share. What is the fun in that?
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