Chapter 27 Zhou Xubai's thoughtfulness The lights outside the car window brushed past her slightly tipsy...
Lin Yuwei had a dream, unsurprisingly, in which time went backwards, pulling her back to the most difficult days when she first arrived abroad.
The sky in this foreign land was always gray, as if it were tinged with her homesickness. The small apartment was poorly heated, and the nights were exceptionally cold and long. She often curled up in bed, wrapping herself up in the blankets, but she still couldn't escape the chill that seeped from the bottom of her heart. The nights were longer than the days. The non-native language environment, the pressure of her studies, and the cultural barriers were like invisible mountains pressing down on her young shoulders.
The most agonizing thing is the omnipresent loneliness. Walking on unfamiliar streets, watching the blond-haired, blue-eyed crowd chatting and laughing, she felt like a speechless bystander, completely out of place. Every day after school and work, she would return to her cold rented room, facing the empty walls, the silence almost swallowing her whole.
Of all these hardships, the sharpest knife is longing. It is all-pervasive; when she sees couples embracing in the street, or when she is woken up by the cold in the middle of the night, longing grows wildly like vines, choking her heart and making it hard to breathe.
She took out her phone countless times, the faint light of the screen illuminating her tear-streaked face. Her fingertips trembled as she dialed the number she knew by heart, the number she had once thought would be there for her forever. The numbers appeared one by one in her eyes, as if pressing the dial button would allow her to hear that familiar, clear voice and gain a sliver of illusory comfort.
But she never dared to actually press it. Pride wouldn't allow it, pain wouldn't allow it, and the resentment and despair of being completely abandoned and resolutely pushed away by him wouldn't allow it either.
Later, she began to force herself to go out, and she did make like-minded friends. They would spend time in the library studying art history together, go out to sketch on weekends with their art supplies, go boating on the lake on warm afternoons, and volunteer at the orphanage on cold mornings...
These solid, warm, and supportive friendships gradually pulled her out of the suffocating feeling of self-isolation, allowing her to rediscover the reality and warmth of life, and helping her to slowly learn to smile at herself.
However, she developed a habit that she couldn't quite pinpoint when it started: she would subconsciously collect all the financial magazine articles about Gu Qingyan, but she never looked at them closely. She would just silently buy those magazines with his name and blurry figure printed on them, and then lock them together with the only sketchbook Gu Qingyan had drawn for her in his early years, which she had taken with her when she left, into an old box.
Every stroke in that sketchbook was filled with his burning gaze at that time. She carefully and resolutely sealed it all away, as if by doing so, she could also properly settle those twelve years of love and hate, as if by doing so, she would not be a wanderer who had been uprooted and was adrift without roots.
The emotions mixed with love, pain, resentment, and despair remained sharp and intense even when they reappeared in her dreams years later, causing her excruciating pain. In the latter half of the night, as the effects of the melatonin wore off, she suddenly woke up from this cold and heartbreaking dream. She sat up and found a cold, damp patch on her pillow, and a layer of cold sweat broke out on her back, as if she had returned to those countless nights of self-struggle in a foreign land.
The sunlight streaming through the window illuminated the room. Lin Yuwei sat on the bed, hugging her knees. The pain in her dream felt so real, relentlessly pounding at her nerves. She never wanted to experience those days of isolation and helplessness, struggling to survive on longing and memories again. She was completely awake.
Regardless of Gu Qingyan's motives for helping this time—whether it was out of consideration for past relationships or simply because he recognized the project's value—objectively, he did help Shiguang overcome her difficulties. She appreciated his kindness, but that was all; she couldn't and dared not give him any more personal emotional responses.
She knew she had to build a strong defense. All subsequent contact had to be strictly limited to work-related matters, conducted professionally, and with a distance maintained. A dangerous encounter like last night's must never happen again. It had taken her eight long years to gradually pull herself out of the quagmire of the past, and she could not afford to lose again and fall back into it.
With the successful handover of the main body of the cultural corridor project, the subsequent work entered the detailed implementation stage, and Lin Yuwei decisively adjusted the coordination strategy.
During the project progress synchronization meeting, she calmly stated: "The general direction and framework have been determined. I believe that subsequent detailed communication and problem feedback can be efficiently resolved through regular online meetings, which can save time costs for both parties."
Gu Qingyan, sitting at the other end of the long table, was silent for a moment. His gaze lingered on her face for a while, revealing no emotion. Lin Yuwei lowered her head guiltily, avoiding eye contact with him. After a long while, she heard him agree in a soft voice: "Okay, we'll arrange it according to President Lin's wishes."
After that, whenever there were physical samples or technical adjustments that required in-person confirmation, Lin Yuwei would have designers Xiaoyu or Zhou Xubai lead the team over. When Xiaoyu returned from Qichen Technology, she would still exclaim to her, "Sister Weiwei, the engineers at Qichen are really skilled. It's just that President Gu's aura is too strong. Every time he passes by, we don't dare to breathe loudly..." Lin Yuwei just listened with a smile and no longer asked any further questions about Gu Qingyan.
She intentionally reduced all unnecessary contact, like a cautious clam quietly retracting its tentacles. As for Gu Qingyan, there were no more proactive messages. He didn't call or email, as if he had completely withdrawn from her life, leaving only the vague silhouette of a perfect partner.
This deliberate distance and the other party's lack of response made Lin Yuwei feel safe, but in a corner of her heart, an inexplicable emptiness arose. However, she quickly suppressed this feeling and repeatedly told herself: This is good, this is exactly what she needs, and it is the most correct direction for development.
In contrast, she naturally spent more time with Zhou Xubai.
That night, Lin Yuwei stayed up late in her studio revising the final design. A light drizzle began to fall outside the window, and only a warm light shone from the lamp on her desk inside.
It was nearly 10 p.m. when Zhou Xubai, who had a social engagement that evening, showed up, carrying a plate of fragrant food.
"It's still there, as expected." His voice was gentle, with a hint of knowing helplessness. He placed the paper bag he was carrying on the corner of the table, opened it, and found a bowl of still-steaming seafood porridge and a few light side dishes.
He gently scolded, "I was passing by 'Zhou Ji' and thought you must have forgotten to eat again, so I came to see if I guessed right?"
Lin Yuwei looked up from the screen, smelled the warm aroma of the food, and looked at Zhou Xubai's shoulders, which were damp from the drizzle. Her heart softened suddenly, and she did not deny it: "Thank you. You have a hard day out. Instead of going home to rest, you came all the way to see me."
"Do I need to be so polite with you? I'll take you home after we eat. You're such a workaholic, I can't rest properly at home without you checking in." Zhou Xubai smiled, and very naturally picked up the cardigan she was draped over the back of the chair, unfolded it, and gently draped it over her shoulders: "It's raining, and it's chilly at night, don't catch a cold." His movements were smooth and natural, with a kind of considerate intimacy.
Then Zhou Xubai pulled up a chair and sat down diagonally behind her, took out his tablet to handle emails, and quietly kept her company. The only sounds in the room were the sound of her typing on the keyboard, the occasional soft swiping of the screen, and the lingering sound of rain outside the window.
Zhou Xubai would occasionally offer her warm water when she paused, or gently ask "What's wrong?" when she frowned. Without saying much, there was a gentle and reassuring warmth that quietly enveloped Lin Yuwei.
Lin Yuwei sipped her warm porridge, listened to the rain outside the window, and looked at Zhou Xubai's gentle and handsome profile. Compared to Gu Qingyan's sharp and piercing brow bone, his good looks were calm and reassuring. The warm yellow light slid down his forehead, casting a small, gentle shadow on the bridge of his nose, and then gently fell on the corners of his slightly pursed lips. The corners of his lips naturally had a slight upward curve, and even without saying a word, they seemed to contain a hint of smile and patience.
Lin Yuwei felt an indescribable sense of peace and excitement, which silently seeped into her heart like a gentle rain. She suddenly felt that this calm and warm companionship made her feel warm and content.
As the cultural corridor project neared its end, Lin Yuwei was presented with a new project. The organizers invited her to a private cocktail party that evening. At the table, toasts were exchanged, and the person in charge was exceptionally enthusiastic. For the sake of the project, she responded enthusiastically. As glass after glass of red wine went down her throat, even though she had a high alcohol tolerance, she couldn't help but feel a little tipsy.
When the banquet ended, her steps were slightly unsteady. As she walked out of the host's private villa, Lin Yuwei saw Zhou Xubai's Bentley parked at the door.
Zhou Xubai waited for Lin Yuwei outside the private villa where the party was being held. He saw her unsteady from a distance, so he quickly got out of the car, walked over, carefully helped her into the passenger seat, fastened her seatbelt, and then went back to the driver's seat.
Soft music played in the car. Lin Yuwei leaned back in her seat, her consciousness somewhat blurred by the intoxication. Her usually tense defenses relaxed. She turned her head to look at the dazzling street scene outside the window and murmured, "Xu Bai, thank you. You always appear when I need you most."
Zhou Xubai turned to look at her. The lights outside the car window swept across her slightly tipsy cheeks, her eyes were hazy, and her red lips were moist, making her look even more delicate and charming than usual. His Adam's apple bobbed almost imperceptibly, and his voice was lower and gentler than usual: "You don't need to be so polite with me."
Zhou Xubai's car was parked in the garage downstairs from Lin Yuwei's apartment building. He turned to the side and saw that Lin Yuwei was already asleep, so he reached out to unbuckle her seatbelt. Because she was leaning back in the seat, her high curves were pressing against one end of the seatbelt. Zhou Xubai slowed his breathing and carefully avoided Lin Yuwei's body, looking for the seatbelt button below. But his fingertips inevitably touched the waistline under her coat, soft and warm... He gasped, and his hand paused imperceptibly.
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