I know you're reading my book; this is for you.
I know people will say I'm playing the victim again, but I still want to announce to everyone that I really don't love you anymore.
If I trust you again, I'm a bastard, a dog.
My dear Mr. J, thank you for being a part of my youth.
I love you, because you are my whole youth!
I thought about it all night, and it wasn't until just now that I suddenly realized that it's not that you don't love me, it's just that you're a jerk at heart!
We realized that we had been in a relationship for only six months, just a few months.
I only found out you were married after we started dating; you had been married for three months by then!
It's ridiculous, isn't it? You must have been laughing at my stupidity back then, right?
You must be thinking, how can there be such a stupid person in this world?
I was really stupid, so stupid that I forgave you and tolerated you time and time again.
I remember when I found out you were married, I firmly proposed breaking up. I didn't want to steal someone else's husband.
You're trying to comfort me. You say you don't like that woman, and you only got married because you wanted a shield.
It's ridiculous. I laugh at myself for being so foolish as to believe that.
After ignoring you for a month, you suddenly came to see me, and the first thing you said to me was, "I've already agreed to a divorce!"
To be honest, I felt a million times guilty at the time.
But upon further reflection, I realized that you don't love that woman, and even without me, she wouldn't be happy.
Rather than letting her be disappointed again and again while she's filled with expectation, it's better to disappoint her once and for all.
Thinking about it this way, I felt relieved!
Later I found out that the way you treated that woman back then, you would treat me the same way in the future!
But I was so naive back then; I thought we could be together for a long time.
I love the rural churches in Italy, I love Egypt. We're ostracized in China, so let's go abroad.
But fantasy is truly wonderful.
Later, I still couldn't resist your sweet words.
We were really happy back then, and there were surprises from time to time.
Of course, the surprise is that you suddenly flew to see me.
We went through three years, from the honeymoon phase to the more mundane phase.
We've broken up, argued, and made up, but my love for you remains unchanged.
I have been forgiving, being tolerant, compromising, and hoping for a result in a relationship that has no future.
But in the end, reality slapped me hard in the face.
I believe I've invested a lot in this relationship. I could simply send an email claiming I was sick and resign without going to work. You know why.
I remember something you said when we broke up.
You said at the time, "I really love you, but we have different values."
Yes, we have different values.
How despicable are your values, how do you flirt with others, and how do you talk about love?
My values are warped, but they all lean towards you. Only you, and only you!
Honestly, it's good that it's over. I'm quite tired too!
After being tolerated for so long, I've almost forgotten what kind of person I originally was.
Mr. J, I hope you'll be more careful in the future. After all, not everyone is as foolish as I am.
This time I'm truly heartbroken. Goodbye, my youth.
Whether you read this first or in another book, I just want to tell you, you're a complete scumbag!
I've blacklisted all channels. Although I know you won't contact me again, I still need to comfort myself, right?
I comforted myself, saying you must be very sad, very sad that an idiot like me suddenly stopped being an idiot.
Yes, this is indeed a very sad thing, so sad that I want to cry.
Hahahaha, damn it, you're the kind of person who never cries!
You scumbag! You wasted several years of my life. I really want to slap you a few times to vent my anger.
But I'm a coward, you know that, I don't dare to do it.
So you took advantage of my weakness, which is why you disappointed me time and time again.
So you took advantage of my soft heart, that's why you kept begging me for forgiveness!
Damn it, was I mentally challenged before?
Love-free is a relief, I'm so happy now, finally rid of you, you scumbag!
I'm so happy I'm practically going crazy.
Alright, enough nonsense, get lost, you bastard!
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