Chapter 55: Cosmic Latte (7) Over the years, they have all been his...
Guangdong cuisine is famous throughout the country, and Shenzhen has a variety of cuisines from all over the world. However, He Chuan suggested eating Northeastern cuisine.
Lin Xia actually understood him somewhat. When she first arrived here, everything was new to her: Chaoshan, Hakka, and Cantonese cuisine, every meal was different. But after eating them for a while, she actually began to miss the simplest flavors of home. Locality shapes people, and the imprint of a region is etched in our genes. Your stomach determines where you are from.
The Northeast is a vast land, and the flavors of each province are different. Only authentic Northeasterners can taste the subtle differences. There are many Northeasterners and Northeastern restaurants in Shenzhen. Lin Xia had already found several restaurants that were closest to the taste of Wangchun, and there happened to be one nearby.
The two men parked their car on the side of the road, abandoned it, and walked for about ten minutes in the heavy rain holding an umbrella before arriving at the restaurant.
To attract customers, many Northeastern restaurants in southern China deliberately decorate in a stereotypical Northeastern style, with dining tables, heated kangs, large floral quilts, and decorative chili and corn stalks lining the walls. But this restaurant lacks those gimmicks. It features simple round wooden tables, plastic stools, an old electric fan, and plastic-wrapped menus. Walking in, it feels like stepping into childhood memories. This is what Northeastern street restaurants looked like ten or twenty years ago.
After sitting down, He Chuan raised his hand to ask the waiter to place an order, but was stopped by Lin Xia:
“No, just scan the code.”
He Chuan was slightly stunned when he saw Lin Xia scanning the QR code on the corner of the table with her mobile phone:
"I've been back for a few months, but I'm still not used to it. The country has developed so fast in recent years."
He laughed at himself, "Sometimes I feel like the woodcutter who watched the chess game and lost himself in thought. A day in the mountains is like a thousand years in the world."
Lin Xia couldn't help but sigh softly: "Yes, everything is changing too fast."
Born in remote, isolated and backward towns, they yearned for the outside world from a young age. As teenagers, they binged Japanese and Korean dramas, viewed Europe and the United States as beacons of civilization, and considered studying abroad a supreme honor, willing to risk their lives to go abroad. For decades, over a billion people toiled, trading shirts for airplanes, building roads, houses, and high-speed rail. In 2011, China's GDP surpassed Japan's, and in 2018, Shenzhen's GDP surpassed Hong Kong's. Suddenly, we discovered that the gap between China and other countries was narrowing, and in many areas, China was even ahead. Looking back, the world was completely transformed. Even Lin Xia, who had experienced it all firsthand, occasionally felt a sense of daze when she recalled those years. Those who had suddenly returned from abroad were certainly even more unaccustomed.
Once upon a time, Northeast China was prosperous, vibrant, and thriving. Industrialization swept across the land, and the crops grown from the black soil fed hundreds of millions of people across the country. But since their generation was born, Northeast China has quietly declined, becoming synonymous with remoteness and backwardness. When people talk about development and prosperity, they think of coastal areas and businesses.
The times are moving too fast, and naturally some people will be left behind. In this vast and turbulent world, we are as insignificant as ants. Should we study literature or science? Should we go south or north? Parents, teachers, no one can transcend the times and have the unique insight to pick out the absolutely correct path. We are all gambling with our fate.
With academic qualifications devaluing and prices soaring, is our reckless decision still a wise one? Have we outrun time?
The evening dining peak had long passed, and there were not many customers in the restaurant. The dishes we ordered were served quickly. There were three fresh dishes, a great harvest, home-cooked cold dishes, Wuchang rice, and sweet and sour pork. The rich and pungent smell of vinegar passed through our noses, making it difficult to distinguish between time and space.
Taste is the most evocative of memories. Is this Shenzhen or Wangchun?
He Chuan picked up a piece of food with chopsticks and tasted it. The salty and fragrant taste came to his mind before he even took a sip. He was speechless for a moment.
After a moment, he spoke in a hoarse voice:
"I haven't tasted this flavor in many years."
London has its share of Chinese restaurants, but they're either a mixed bag or serve Sichuan or Cantonese cuisine. Even if you cook at home, the seasonings and ingredients are always off, and you can't quite recapture the flavors of the past. He wasn't originally from Northeast China, so his hometown wasn't important. The years he spent in Wangchun, from sixteen to nineteen, were the most stable and worry-free years of his life to date. Deep down, he was half Northeast China, and Wangchun was his second home.
For Chinese people, the dinner table is the best social place. Coming from such a cramped and embarrassing enclosed space to such a familiar restaurant full of the atmosphere of fireworks, both of them couldn't help but feel a sense of closeness. Once they relaxed, some words came out of their mouths.
"Why did you suddenly come back?" Lin Xia asked softly.
After all the calculations, he should have obtained permanent residence long ago. She thought he would never come back.
"When I was studying in Hong Kong, I took a letter of recommendation from my school to intern at Bank of America in Central. There, I met Matt, who is now Dai Zhicheng, the head of Irving in Shenzhen. He had a good impression of me. Last year, Irving planned to set up an office in Shenzhen and appointed him as the chief representative. He immediately thought of me and sent me an invitation. After careful consideration, I decided to accept."
He Chuan paused and said slowly:
"In fact, in white society, Asians, especially Chinese, face invisible resistance. There is a transparent ceiling for career advancement. My promotion has reached a bottleneck, and further advancement is almost impossible."
He spoke very tactfully, trying to make everything sound not so bad, but Lin Xia still understood. Racial discrimination, differential treatment, and the years he had spent wandering in a foreign land must have been more difficult than she had imagined.
He Chuan didn't seem to want to talk about this topic anymore, so he asked Lin Xia:
"How about you? Are you adapting well in Shenzhen?"
This hasn't changed for him over the years; he's never been willing to talk about his predicament.
Lin Xia naturally didn't point it out, and just followed his words and said:
"Fortunately, Shenzhen is a city of immigrants and is not xenophobic, because there aren't many locals in Shenzhen to begin with."
In Shenzhen, when two people first meet and greet each other, they will always ask where you are from, assuming that everyone is from outside the city. Even if you say you are from Shenzhen, the other party will understand that you are a second-generation immigrant. They will then ask where your parents are from. Only after confirming that your ancestors are all indigenous people will they ask which village you are originally from. As everyone knows, this place used to be a fishing village.
"Compared to the UK, Shenzhen is still relatively close," said He Chuan.
Lin Xia shook her head: "But it's still so far away from Wangchun."
Over the years, they have all been strangers in a foreign land, rootless like duckweed, drifting north and south, loving their hometown, hating it, missing it, but none of them can go back.
When mentioning Wangchun, I think of the past. After all, some topics cannot be avoided.
"Xia Xia, I'm sorry."
He Chuan said this without any warning.
"Back then, I wasn't able to be by your side to face those things with you..."
Lin Xia felt uncomfortable after hearing this. She suddenly picked up the glass and took a big sip of tea. Then she put the glass down and said in a serious tone:
"He Chuan, I told you that you never have to apologize to me. It's not your fault."
Neither Lin Haisheng’s will nor their parents’ lawsuit had anything to do with them.
As for that unrequited love in their youth, it had nothing to do with right or wrong. It was just that they were too young and naive at that time, and they thought that love would last a lifetime. However, they didn't know that the helplessness of reality followed them like a shadow, and as time went by, they just broke up.
If there really was a right and wrong, she was the one who was wrong. She was too willful, too fragile, and took everything for granted. She thought she could handle a long-distance relationship, she thought her relationship with He Chuan wouldn't be affected by distance, she thought she wouldn't be that clingy, anxious, neurotic girlfriend. She had grossly underestimated the weakness of human nature, her own weakness. She wasn't as resolute and brave as she thought.
After her sophomore year, too many unexpected things happened suddenly. The burden of her studies alone was about to overwhelm her. Then Lin Haisheng passed away, and the conflicts between Lin Xuedong, Zhao Qianyi and He Ping intensified, forcing her to choose between her parents and He Chuan.
But that was He Chuan's busiest period, and he couldn't contact her every now and then. He was about to graduate, and he had to work, prepare for the LPC exam, do an internship, and finish his thesis. He almost wanted to stay up 24 hours a day. How could he have the time to comfort her emotions and take care of her mood?
The human heart is so strange. If you are single, you can swallow the pain and tiredness and get through the difficult days by gritting your teeth. But if you have a partner and support but can't rely on him, you will feel aggrieved and even resentful.
She knew clearly that he was working hard for their future, but she could no longer see a future for the two of them.
He Chuan is in the UK, but Lin Xuedong and Zhao Qianyi will not agree to let her go. The even more difficult reason is that their family can no longer afford the money.
Lin Xia had only a vague idea of her family's financial situation. Zhao Qianyi had previously been tutoring students to earn extra income, and Lin Xuedong's salary wasn't low, otherwise they wouldn't have been able to support Lin Xia's art studies in Beijing. Later, Zhao Qianyi resigned and moved to the provincial capital to open a training course with her good friend Li Wen, but she ended up losing everything. She claimed Li Wen had swindled her, but the written IOU was irrefutable. She lost all her family savings and even took on a significant amount of debt.
At that time, the creditor was very aggressive in demanding the debt. Not only did he come to their home, he also went to Lin Haisheng's workplace to cause trouble, causing Lin Haisheng to be talked to by his superiors, punished, and missed a rare promotion opportunity. In order to delay the repayment time, Zhao Qianyi had to mortgage her family's house and signed a promissory note with a higher interest rate, and the interest has been compounded ever since then.
Therefore, Zhao Qianyi and Lin Xuedong quarreled every day, and they fought over Lin Haisheng's inheritance until they were bloody.
The money that Lin Haisheng left to their family was barely enough to cover their foreign debts, but there was not a penny left. Even the heating bill that winter was paid for by Uncle Lin Xia.
After the lawsuit with He Ping ended, Lin Xia finally learned everything. From then on, to reduce the burden on her family, she began to live frugally, taking on commercial drawings to earn tuition and living expenses, and her plan to go abroad was put on hold for an indefinite period.
From the beginning to the end, He Chuan repeatedly suggested that he would make money, that he would cover all her expenses, and that in a few years, once he obtained his license to practice law, he would be able to support both of them. But Lin Xia still didn't dare to take the risk. It wasn't that she didn't believe He Chuan could make it, she just didn't want to be a burden to him. She didn't want their relationship to be tainted by money. After all, human nature is so fragile that even blood relatives are not immune.
A few years is a vague concept. If a lawyer wants to make a name for himself, it may take three to five years at the shortest, or ten to eight years at the longest, not to mention in a foreign country. She was afraid that they would drag each other down during the difficult years, and that one day they would become like Zhao Qianyi, Lin Xuedong and He Ping, hysterical and unrecognizable for the sake of money.
When she was most desperate and painful, Lin Xia called He Chuan and asked him crying:
"He Chuan, what should we do next?"
How despicable and selfish she is. She threw the problem to him, forced him to make a choice, and let him be the bad guy.
He Chuan was silent for a few seconds, and those few seconds seemed as long as a lifetime.
Then he said to her in a hoarse voice, word by word:
"Xia Xia, wait for me. After this period of time, I will return home."
Lin Xia was completely stunned when she heard this.
No one in this world knows better than her how hard he has worked to get to where he is today.
They are just children from ordinary families. They are not geniuses, nor are they rich. They just have some talent, some intelligence, some luck, and some more effort. Every step in their life is taken cautiously and with difficulty. Every exam and every career choice is a crossroads of life and death. There is no cost of trial and error, no chance to start over. If they are not careful, they will be back to their original state and there is no way back.
He worked tirelessly for three years in high school, persisted in his major despite the pressure from all teachers, worked and studied at the Chinese University of Hong Kong, studied late into the night in that narrow and simple village house, left his hometown in London, England, and finally got his degree through part-time work and study. It was clear that he was only one step away from his original dream.
But now, he has to give up everything and start over, just for her, for her tears.
Lin Xia, ask yourself, if it were you, would you be willing to give up art, your future, your ideals, and your parents and family for him?
At that moment, Lin Xia could no longer suppress the overwhelming sadness in her heart, so she squatted in the empty stairwell in the dormitory corridor and burst into tears.
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