Chapter 141 Leaving the Capital (25) He's always been this kind of person...
Six eunuchs arrived, carrying three large, red-lacquered and gold-painted chests. They placed them in the outer room, which were filled with brand-new clothes and shoes. The eunuchs took out two large flat boxes from the chests, brought them to Jiuli, and opened them. Inside were two complete sets of headdresses, one set of gold inlaid with various gemstones, and the other set of jade.
The head eunuch said, "These were all given to Miss Jiuli by Eunuch Shen. Eunuch Shen said that the young lady probably didn't bring many clothes and jewelry with her when she came to the capital. The capital is not like the south. The young lady is young and weak and can't stand the cold here. She is also afraid that she won't be able to buy suitable winter clothes outside."
This was truly a timely help. Yu Qi had just mentioned wanting to buy Jiu Li a pair of sheepskin boots, but to his surprise, there were already two pairs of sheepskin boots in the trunk. Yu Qi took out some silver to reward a few eunuchs, thanked them, and then asked the head steward Yang Qingnian to see them off properly. Xu Bai then ordered two servants to carry the trunk to Jiu Li's room.
Taking advantage of the opportunity, Yu Qi, Jiu Li, and Zhang Da returned to the guest house. On the way, Zhang Da sighed, "The chief eunuch in the palace is really something else. Look at his generosity! He sent several boxes of things in one go! I wonder how wealthy he is! Hey, tell me, what does a eunuch with no children need so much money for?"
"You think those things were really given to you by Eunuch Shen?" Yu Qi smiled.
Upon hearing this, Jiu Li suddenly realized, "Could it be that the Emperor ordered him to deliver this to me?"
Zhang Dayi gradually realized, "Hey! It seems that Little Fish really is a princess!"
Yu Qi remained silent, pondering to himself. Judging from the Emperor's actions, this matter was indeed true. Back then, he and Shan Heng were in love but no one knew about it, mainly because Shan Heng worked in the late Emperor's study, while Zhou Hao was the Crown Prince at the time. Given their special status, being too intimate might arouse suspicion from the court officials and the late Emperor.
However, judging from the fact that Shanheng did not name Jiuli, the two of them probably had a falling out and parted ways before Jiuli was born. But Shanheng later turned against him and helped King Feng tamper with the will. What exactly caused the disagreement between her and Zhou Hao to this point is probably unknown to anyone except Zhou Hao himself.
Because the inside story was shrouded in mystery, Yu Qi instructed, "No one is allowed to spread this matter outside unless the Emperor makes it public, and Yu'er must not pretend to be a princess."
Zhang Da hurriedly walked around to his right and asked, "Sir, do you mean that the Emperor doesn't intend to reveal Xiaoyuer's true identity to the world?" As he spoke, he turned his eyes and sighed, "No wonder the Emperor used Eunuch Shen's name to send these things to Xiaoyuer."
The sigh was like a breeze that brushed into Jiu Li's heart. She suddenly felt a sense of emptiness. She had finally found her biological father, but it was as if she had never found him at all.
Yu Qi glanced at her sideways, and a look of disappointment unconsciously appeared on her face. He was worried, so when it was late at night, he deliberately opened the door and peeked into the east room. There was still a light on in the room, so she probably hadn't gone to sleep yet.
Little did she know that Jiu Li wasn't in the room at all. She had already come to the lotus pond not far from the courtyard with a lantern. The pond hadn't been cleaned in a long time, and it was full of withered lotus leaves and duckweed. Through the cracks, she could see the reflection of the full moon gently undulating with the water, like a piece of white jade dropped to the bottom. Suddenly, she remembered the time when she and Du Zhong used to play with pebbles in the water tank where lotus flowers were grown when they were children. They would both get soaked, but it was the height of summer then, and being wet was actually refreshing. Unlike this stagnant pond in front of her, which felt icy cold just to look at.
She looked up at the sky; the moon looked like a stained piece of snow. The stone beneath her was also freezing cold. The capital was chilly everywhere, and she felt no sense of prosperity. She would definitely tell Du Zhong when she got back that the capital was not as good as Suzhou at all.
Oh right, it was Xu Bai who quietly told her he had something to say to her, which is why he asked her to wait for him here. He didn't dare to go into the room to speak to her; he was afraid of Yu Qi, and most likely, he himself felt guilty about Du Zhong's death. She hadn't originally planned to come, but then she thought about it and decided she wanted to hear his explanation for Du Zhong's death.
Before long, Xu Bai arrived with a lantern. From afar, he saw her sitting hunched over by the pond, a lantern at her feet, its dim light casting a shadow on her slightly hunched back. Her face was bathed in the cold moonlight, and she was wearing a white fox fur cloak that had just been delivered, making her look like a white fox that had wandered into a bustling city, exuding a sense of timidity and bewilderment.
He had long known that the power struggles here would leave her feeling lost, yet he still brought her here for his own selfish gain. Perhaps she had already seen through his hypocrisy and selfishness. He suddenly felt a pang of fear and stopped in his tracks.
But now there's no turning back. Since ancient times, loyalty and filial piety have been difficult to reconcile, and the tender feelings for one's children can often dampen the spirit of even the bravest hero. He took a deep breath, started walking again, and slowly walked to the Taihu stone. He said softly, "The snow on the stone has just melted. Aren't you cold sitting here?"
Upon hearing that voice, Jiuli immediately recalled the first time she spoke to him. At that time, he treated her as a suspect, even though he had come to take her away. Yet, he never spoke harshly to her, but treated her with gentleness and politeness, showing himself to be very kind.
She glanced at him sideways, muttering to herself, "My uncle was never this gentle when he was in his early twenties—"
Xu Bai didn't hear clearly and thought she was cursing him. He turned around sadly towards the pond. "Do you know what I like most about you? It's this courage to love and hate." He smiled and lowered his head. "You should blame me. I am indeed responsible for Du Zhong's death."
She felt a chill run down her spine, staring intently at his retreating figure. Just like with Xiuzhi, she wanted to hate him but couldn't muster any emotion.
He felt as if two nails had been driven into his back. He knew how she was looking at him from behind, but when he turned around, he was still stung by her indifferent gaze. Her eyes seemed even colder in the cold night wind.
He smiled sadly, "I know you've been angry with me because of Du Zhong's death, and you don't talk to me much anymore. Mr. Yu is probably blaming me too, but I know that no matter how I explain to him, his attitude towards me won't improve. I just can't stand your estrangement from me, so I have to tell you."
Jiuli tilted her eyes and said, "What's there to say? Do you think you can lie to me?"
Unexpectedly, he sat down next to me, elbows on his legs, back slumped, hands holding a lantern and shoving it towards the water in front of him, looking rather dejected. “When we left Nanjing, the servant that Chen Jia sent followed our boat. You asked me then if I recognized him, and I lied. Actually, I recognized him.”
"I lied," he thought to himself, a phrase he'd uttered as a child. The word "lie" sounded so childish; adults wouldn't admit to lying, and even a lie had to be so convincing that it could fool even themselves. Though she was clever and quick-witted, she was ultimately as innocent as a child, and he could only communicate with her in a childlike way.
Jiuli lowered her eyes as he looked down, her gaze fixed on him. "Then why did you hide it from me back then?"
“At that time, I thought the Chen family had sent him to spy on me. I was preoccupied with the matter of the Prince. Actually, I invited you to the capital to lure Mr. Yu to the capital to help the Prince clear his name. I knew that Mr. Yu had never liked me, and if I asked him directly, he would definitely refuse. So I resorted to this tactic. I didn’t dare to say it then because I was afraid you would think I was a selfish person. I never expected that the servant was sent by the Chen family to harm Du Zhong.”
He himself couldn't tell whether what she said was true or false, but one thing he was very clear about was that he had only stood by and watched. She was a reasonable person, and even if she wanted to hate him, she didn't know where to begin.
As expected, Jiuli glared at him for a long time, until tears welled up in her eyes, but she couldn't find a fault to pin on him. She could only ask, "If you had known, would you still have stood by and watched?"
She herself was also at a loss, so she wiped away her tears and smiled bitterly, "I only see through you now. You've always been a selfish person."
These words tasted completely different coming from his own mouth versus from hers. Xu Bai suddenly remembered that his mother had said similar things before.
Instead, he smiled and said, "Are you shedding tears for Du Zhong, or are you disappointed in me because you think that although Mr. Yu and I look somewhat alike, we are two completely different people?"
Jiuli was startled and guiltily looked away.
He turned to face her, a lingering, melancholy smile on his face. “I approached you at first because you looked like Aunt Quan, and you were close to me at first because you thought I resembled your uncle. But you should have known that I am not Mr. Yu, and there is no reason for you to be disappointed in me.”
Now she felt a little guilty and secretly glanced at him.
He smiled at her and said, "It's alright, I've never resented you."
Suddenly, a cold laugh rang out from somewhere, "Second Master Qi is truly magnanimous."
The two looked to their right, and Yu Qi slowly emerged from the darkness. Jiu Li, meeting his angry eyes, felt a pang of panic, as if caught in adultery. She quickly got up from the rock and ran to his side, "Uncle, why aren't you asleep so late?"
"You weren't asleep either, were you?" He glanced at her coldly, then looked at Xu Bai. "What you say in the middle of the night is either trying to fool people or ghosts. If you're so open and honest, why don't you say it openly and honestly during the day, Second Master Qi?"
Xu Bai felt a surge of resentment, but he could only slowly rise and bow. "Mr. Yu, you have misunderstood. I invited Yu'er out to explain why that servant from the Chen family was following us earlier."
"Oh? How do you explain it? Explain it to me too, so I won't keep holding a grudge about it." Yu Qi smiled faintly, sat down on the Taihu rock, and glanced at him sideways.
Xu Bai glanced at Jiu Li and had to repeat himself: "I told Yu'er that I didn't recognize that servant because I thought he was sent by the Chen family to monitor me, and I didn't know that he came for Du Zhong."
Yu Qi seemed to have anticipated his words, his expression unchanged, still smiling. "Even if you knew but didn't say anything, you wouldn't be guilty of anything. In fact, in Master Qi's eyes, apart from the life and death of Prince Zhao, everyone else's life is worthless. I think Master Qi's desire to save the prince is only for his own future. Am I right?"
He saw things clearly after all. Since the matter had come to this point, there was no point in hiding it, as it would only seem hypocritical. So Xu Bai simply admitted, "Sir, you are right. I am doing this for my own future, and also for my elder brother's long-cherished wish."
"Why are you dragging your older brother into this again? Your older brother, Qi Xuyun, is already dead. What, do you want to pull him out to take some responsibility for you?"
Xu Bai bit his cheek, remained silent for a while, and then said, "Sir, you see what the Qi family has become now? Ever since my grandfather and father passed away in Nanjing, it has always been my elder brother's wish to revive the Qi family. For this responsibility, he urged and taught me like a father. My brother and I studied hard, and my elder brother passed the imperial examination at the age of nineteen, and I passed it at the age of seventeen. But what good has it done?!"
As he spoke with such fervor, Jiu Li turned to look at him. The moon was high in the sky, and two lanterns were placed under the Taihu stone. In the dim light, she could see that his eyes were red and glistening with tears. It turned out that what could evoke any genuine emotion in him was never romantic love.
She was somewhat surprised, but then felt that her surprise was unreasonable. Yu Qi had warned her long ago that he had always been this kind of person.
Xu Bai continued, "His Majesty has harbored resentment towards the Qi family all these years, simply because his grandfather advised him to pardon Prince Feng to avoid fratricide and being condemned by the world! As the saying goes, honest advice is hard to swallow, but His Majesty has been ruthless and stubborn since childhood. He not only refuses to listen but also holds a grudge against the Qi family for many years. Do you think the Chen family's favor is solely due to Consort Chen? The Chen family gained favor first, and then Consort Chen was selected to enter the palace. Do you think the two Chens' control of the court is due to their cunning and shrewdness? But if a wise ruler were in power, how could he tolerate such treacherous officials for so long?"
Yu Qi smiled casually, "If others hear what you're saying, it could easily lead to your death."
Xu Bai, facing the pond with his hands clasped behind his back, said, “Even if it costs me my head, I will still say this. In the first ten years of His Majesty’s reign, he did work diligently and made many contributions to the country and the people. But to be a wise ruler is easier said than done. In recent years, His Majesty has been losing his energy and has begun to neglect state affairs. This has gradually led to complaints from his officials. So His Majesty used the two Chen brothers to dismiss his advisors and persecute loyal officials. The two Chen brothers were just a shield for His Majesty’s arrogance and tyranny. You said I was doing this for my own future. That’s true. I am doing this for my own future ambitions, but also for the country and the people.”
She hadn't witnessed the suffering of the common people, nor was she an official; she wouldn't be informed of natural disasters or man-made calamities, nor did she know of the court's supposed benevolent governance. However, she had indeed witnessed many injustices in Nanjing that year. If Nanjing was like this, what about other places?
She was about to say something when she caught a glare from Yu Qi, so she had to swallow her words.
After a short while, Yu Qi laughed and said, "What's the use of telling us all this? We can't help Master Qi in any way."
Xu Bai smiled faintly, "I say all this so that you and Yu'er won't be prejudiced against the Prince because of your grudges against me. I hope you can investigate this case fairly and clear the Prince's name. With the Prince around, the people of the world still have hope."
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Author's note: Thank you for reading.
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