"Why is Lord Wei here?" Wei Qian just blocked the light above Zhang You's head. She raised her head and couldn't see his expression for a moment.
For some unknown reason, she felt that they were a little close, so she quietly took a step back and spoke in a distant tone.
Wei Qian watched her movements without moving. He didn't answer her question, but felt that her current appearance was so distant and inexplicably made him feel a little lost.
"You should stop calling me Lord Wei. I'm not used to it."
Zhang You met his gaze, and inexplicably, she did not refuse him outright like before, but just pursed her lips, not knowing whether to agree or refuse.
Wei Qian saw her embarrassment and laughed out loud. The sound was very soft, but it was clearly heard by Zhang You. She looked at him with a puzzled look on her face.
"Nothing, I won't embarrass you. You can call me whatever you want."
A low voice sounded in his ears. The alley was so quiet that he could even hear his breathing. Along with the laughing words, Zhang You's ears turned red in shame.
Zhang You looked into his eyes against the light. Wei Qian's eyes at that moment made her feel a little flustered. She was a little flustered and changed the subject, pretending to be calm: "Master Wei hasn't said why you are here yet?"
"I just happened to be passing by."
"oh."
…
The air suddenly became quiet. Zhang You had nothing to say and didn't dare to look him in the eye. This silence made her want to escape.
As if sensing her thoughts, Wei Qian turned slightly and leaned against the wall behind him, his posture casual, not at all like the Imperial College's chief academic officer. His posture was so relaxed, as if he was truly free at this moment.
He looked at her and said softly, "Come to think of it, I haven't had a chance to reminisce with you. If it's convenient, please talk to me."
"It's been a long time." Zhang You recalled that they had met only a few times in this year and had hardly spoken to each other. However, during these times they met, he had come to her rescue in time.
Thinking of this, Zhang You leaned against the wall with him and started talking.
"Thank you for saving me twice before."
Perhaps it was because this posture itself was defenseless, so she gradually let go of her previous alienation.
At least at this moment, there were only the two of them who could temporarily put aside those plans.
"If you hadn't rescued me in time, I would have died long ago." Zhang You mentioned it with a smile, and there was self-mockery in his eyes.
The capital city is indeed a den of dragons and tigers.
Wei Qian saw the self-mockery in her eyes.
How could he not know the dangers of the capital, the fame and fortune of the rich and powerful, and how many people could remain pure and unwavering, and not follow the crowd? Hadn't he been like this for the past few years...
But when he saw her again, the simple time they spent together enjoying delicious food made him regain some of his former ambitions.
"The capital is just like this. Countless people flock here for fame and fortune. Everywhere is filled with schemes and deceptions. If you're not careful, you'll be doomed."
His voice was full of vicissitudes, as if he was the person he described as being trapped in the world of fame and fortune, struggling hard, with no one able to help him escape.
Zhang You looked at Wei Qian. He lowered his head to look at the shadow at his feet. His hair hanging on both sides blocked his eyes. She couldn't see clearly, but she knew that he had not had an easy life in the past few years.
"Did you get what you wanted? You once said you wanted a high-ranking position, to prove yourself as a member of the Wei family, and to prove yourself no less than the eldest son of Wei. Now that you've entered the imperial court as an official, you're almost there, and your dream is finally here. Why are you still unhappy?"
Long ago, they sat in a tavern in Dingzhou, discussing the future. He was unwilling to be known as a bastard, nor to be constantly outshone by Wei Nian. He imagined a future in which he would become an official, surpass Wei Nian, and be admired by the world. She, on the other hand, simply hoped that Dingzhou's stability would continue.
Now, her wish is gone, what about him?
"Me?" Wei Qian smiled, shook his head, and sighed deeply. He himself was also confused. "I don't know. Everything is clearly going according to my plan, so why do I always feel unhappy? After I really entered the court as an official, I found that things are not as simple as I thought. The relationships in the officialdom are complicated and often form cliques..."
He looked lonely, like a drowning man who urgently needed a pair of hands to pull him out.
"You once said that you wanted to be an official, and now your wish has come true. I heard people talking about you when I first came to the capital. You are a young talent, just like the eldest son of Wei. You can fight for a place in the court at a young age. Your wish has come true." Zhang You looked at him with gentle eyes, affirming his achievements in recent years.
"But after you actually entered the court as an official, you discovered that some things were different from what you had imagined, so you were confused. Have you ever thought that perhaps you need to rethink what you want? What makes you feel embarrassed? What is blocking your way? What do you really want?"
Zhang You also had selfish motives.
She knew what was causing Wei Qian pain.
He was tormented by the incorruptibility he'd learned, so he couldn't reconcile with the current corrupt bureaucracy. He was a tiny speck of dust, unable to shake the mighty trees. Trying to shake a tree with an ant would only lead to failure. But he refused to accept this, unwilling to bury his true nature.
That's why he suffers.
She said this because she knew the scoundrel emperor's behavior would inevitably lead to resistance. The corruption in the court had long since left no room for loyal ministers and capable generals, and countless aristocratic families in the capital had fallen on hard times because of it. She told him this to make him understand the problem and to make the right choice.
Wei Qian didn't seem to expect Zhang You to say such a thing. He looked at her with bright eyes, as if there was light in them.
"Those involved are often confused, but those who are observing clearly can see more clearly. You see things more clearly than I do." Wei Qian's eyes were gentle, and his voice grew firmer as he spoke each word. "Prime Minister Xu holds absolute power in the court. I heard he's already arranging a marriage between the Crown Prince and his daughter. Once they're married, Prime Minister Xu's position will undoubtedly be even more secure. I don't want to be like them, going against my conscience and persecuting innocent people."
Zhang You smiled knowingly. He really didn't let her down. "Do you know what the word 'he' in my name means? I think it suits you very well."
Wei Qian looked at her gently, waiting for her to continue.
"'Emerging from the mud without being stained, washing in the clear water without being coquettish' is a line written by a noble man about lotus. I think it suits you very well now."
Wei Qian felt that he must have drunk too much during dinner. Otherwise, when he saw her eyes looking at him, he felt as if they were soaked in sweet wine, with an intoxicating richness.
He repeated the poem word by word in his mouth, and the smile on his lips grew bigger and bigger, as if the haze in his heart was cleared away with every word that was uttered.
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