The late spring sunset stained the eastern courtyard of the General's Mansion amber. The golden signboard of "Weiwan Trickster Academy" shone like honey in the slanting light. Shen Weiwan slumped over the carved wooden railing on the second floor, the tassels of her moon-white skirt drooping, brushing against a handwritten copy of the "Guide to Trickster Prevention" drying on the railing. The courtyard was bustling with activity. The Imperial Tutor's wife was directing her maids to stuff sesame candies into their lilac cuffs. Jade bracelets jingled against the rosewood table. The young master of the West Market Silk Shop, pinned to the blue brick floor by his father, sobbed as he demonstrated the "Chili Powder Keyhole Tactic" defense. His nose was as red as a hawthorn fresh from the sugar jar.
"Look, young lady!" Chuntao approached, carrying a tray of gilded lotus flowers, the peach blossom pastries still steaming. "Madam Li's icing is almost dripping onto the floor on her sleeves. The young master of the silk shop is so loud, I'm afraid he could wake up Mrs. Liu in the Croton fields of Lingnan!"
Chen Weiwan bit off a piece of peach blossom pastry, the layers of pastry falling onto her skirt. She looked out at the chaotic scene in the courtyard, and suddenly remembered the chill in the ancestral hall on the day of her rebirth. When her aunt pulled her hand for the red gold hairpin, the pain of the jade armor digging into her palm seemed to linger. A flash of coldness flashed in her eyes, but was quickly dispelled by the laughter that erupted in the courtyard. She wiped the pastry at the corner of her mouth with the edge of her moon-white sleeve and muttered, "What's the rush? Back then, I was cheated by the Liu family and didn't even have a complete set of clothes. Now let them practice their skills so they won't cry out in pain when they fall into the real trap in the future."
"What are you thinking about?" Xiao Yu's voice came from behind her. The cedar scent of his dark brocade robe enveloped her. He flicked the crispy crumbs from her hair with his fingers and followed her gaze toward the courtyard. "Are you thinking about making 'Croton Field Management' a required course in the spring?"
Chen Weiwan turned and threw herself into his arms, nuzzling the golden-embroidered python pattern on his chest. She pointed at the sleeves of Madam Taifu's cuffs, which were stuck with sugar, and laughed until her shoulders trembled. "Your Highness, look, when we send the enrollment brochure to the Lingnan Posthouse, Liu might be able to grow croton as a tribute! Then we can give her a certificate of 'Best Deceptive Farmer of the Year'!"
Xiao Yu laughed and rubbed the top of her head with his fingertips. "You, you hold grudges so deep that they extend back into the industrial chain." He looked at the tutor chasing the emperor in the courtyard. He suddenly lowered his voice, his warm breath brushing against her ear. "Just now, the emperor sent someone to say that he wants to learn from you the 'morning court doze-off strategy.' He said that the prime minister always handed in memorials when he was dozing off, and yesterday he even wrote 'the national treasury is empty' instead of 'the national treasury is full.'"
"Puff—" Chen Weiwan nearly fell off the railing with laughter. "That's easy! Have His Majesty paint a pair of fake eyes on his eyelids with cinnabar. I guarantee the Prime Minister will glare at me the moment he hands over a memorial. I can also scare off the censors at the same time!"
As he spoke, the old butler came shakily over, leaning on his newly replaced sandalwood cane. The bronze carvings on the cane's head scraped against the blue bricks, making a small sound. A few grains of icing sugar were still stained on his snow-white beard. "My lady, His Highness the Seventh Prince, the palace lady from the Empress Dowager's palace has come again. She said she wants to order a 'Deluxe Package for the Concubine Dowager's Treatment' and asked if she could also give her a 'Jingshifang Eunuch Anti-Scam Gift Pack'. Finally, she secretly slipped this piece of osmanthus cake to me..."
Chen Weiwan nearly spit out a mouthful of peach blossom pastry on the railing. Xiao Yu quickly handed over the celadon teacup and sighed helplessly: "It seems that your 'business of deceiving people' is really going to end up in Kunning Palace. Shouldn't you open a 'harem anti-deceiving branch' tomorrow?"
The courtyard erupted in laughter. The emperor, dressed in his dark blue uniform, was seen wielding a wolf-hair brush, dripping Huizhou ink onto the Grand Tutor's crimson official uniform. He exclaimed, "Watch this! My 'ink-stained blue lotus' scheme is ten times more effective than your 'fake accounting scheme'!" The ink splattered across the Grand Tutor's chest, resembling a feathered black chicken flapping its wings, ready to take flight.
"Your Majesty, look at how much this ink halo resembles a pair of lotus flowers!" Chen Weiwan quickly smoothed things over, dotting the ink with her fingertips and making up a story, "It symbolizes that the Grand Tutor and Your Majesty are of one mind, so even the ink carries its own auspiciousness!"
The Grand Tutor blew his beard and glared at her, but the Emperor patted him on the shoulder first: "That's right! Wan'er's quick wit is more effective than your rigid account books! Come on, come on, teach me how to use icing sugar to cover up the smell of croton powder. This morning, the Grand Tutor said my ginseng soup had a strange 'longevity' smell!"
Xiao Yu pulled Shen Weiwan to hide behind the Taihu stone, listening to the emperor's footsteps fade away, and shook his head helplessly: "Ever since my father became your disciple, the impeachment memorials from the Censorate have to be sprinkled with a layer of icing sugar before they can be handed in during the morning court."
Shen Weiwan laughed so hard that she fell backwards. Suddenly, she grabbed his hand and pressed it against her belly. Her eyes were as bright as stars. "Your Highness, do you think our child will be born with the talent to cheat others? For example, when he was still in swaddling clothes, he stuffed itchy grass into the nurse's sleeves, and sprinkled croton powder into the guests' teacups at the 100-day banquet?"
Xiao Yu froze, looking down at her sparkling eyes, a tenderness instantly filling them. He crouched down, his fingertips gently resting on her flat belly. His voice, as husky as crushed moonlight, said, "As you wish." He looked up at her, his eyes twinkling like the Milky Way. "Even if he stole my jade seal and traded it for candied haws, I'll just consider it your 'entrance fee'."
"What if she changes your black hat into a 'croton sprayer'?" Shen Weiwan blinked and deliberately shook his sleeve.
"Just think of it as replacing the saddle for my mount." Xiao Yu suddenly laughed out loud, lowered his head and kissed her forehead, "But... have you really thought it through?"
Chen Weiwan looked at his handsome profile, his straight nose outlined in the golden glow of the setting sun. Suddenly, she remembered the biting cold of the snow in her previous life. Then she looked at the Imperial Tutor, now chasing the Emperor in the courtyard—the black lotus on his official uniform smudged into a comical black blob as he ran. She nodded vigorously, the glass hairpin in her hair jingling. "I've decided! We're going to have twins, a boy and a girl. The brother will dig the trap, and the sister will sprinkle the sugar in it. We'll be the most beautiful 'sweet couple' in the capital!"
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