The morning mist over the Prince's Palace resembled a soft silk soaked in the sweet fragrance of croton cakes. As it drifted over the Nine-Curved Veranda, it rattled the croton wind chimes hanging from the eaves. Chen Weiwan bit into a freshly baked croton cake, the crispy crumbs scattering across her moon-white skirt. The croton blossoms embroidered on the hem of her skirt shimmered in the morning dew. In the main hall, the Southern Chu envoy sat at attention, his bamboo hat still stained with dew from last night's journey. The cuff of his turquoise official uniform was ripped with a jagged tear, evidently from something tearing it, revealing the washed-out, bleached lining beneath.
"So," Chen Weiwan wiped the powder from her fingertips with a handkerchief. The croton flower tea on the ebony coffee table was emitting hot white steam. "You liars from Nanchu dare to cheat even the emperor's jade seal?" She raised her eyebrows and looked at the messenger. The croton flower hairpin on her bun swayed slightly with her movements.
The messenger's face was mournful, his knuckles making the celadon tea bowl creak. "That's right! On the streets of Yingdu, Old Lady Wang, a vegetable vendor, has been ripped off by fake weights and left with only her trousers. And half a box of newly arrived government silver from the treasury has been traded for brass ingots wrapped in gold foil!" He suddenly thumped to his knees, his forehead thumping against the blue brick floor, shaking off a feather ornament characteristic of Southern Chu from his hair. "My king has said that there's a Shen Weiwan in Dasheng who's incredibly skilled in the art of deception. Please save the people of Southern Chu!"
Xiao Yu, sitting nearby, paused, holding the tea bowl. A few drops of croton tea sloshed out of the celadon cup, splattering light brown spots on the bright yellow tablecloth. He raised an eyebrow and looked at the messenger. The golden dragon pattern on his black python robe faded with his movements. "Messenger, please be polite. That's my princess."
"Yes, yes, yes!" The envoy hurriedly got up, and the front of his official uniform rubbed against the croton powder on the edge of the table, leaving a crooked mark. "Your Highness the Seventh Prince's Consort! As long as you are willing to help, Nanchu is willing to pay tribute to croton every year... No, ten carts of pure gold!" His eyes were wide open, as if he wanted to stare a hole in Shen Weiwan.
Chen Weiwan's eyes were as bright as lights, and she didn't even bother to pat the cake crumbs that fell on her clothes: "Gold? Let me make it clear first, it has to be pure gold. Don't try to fool me with fake gold mixed with copper - that stuff is something my family wouldn't even bother using for playing house."
"Absolutely pure gold!" the messenger swore, his hand pressed to his chest. "If I tell even a single lie, I'll be ripped off by these swindlers and left with nothing but my underwear, squatting on the streets of Yingdu every day and starving!"
Three days later, flags fluttered before the Prince's palace. Standing beneath the carved gatehouse, Chen Weiwan watched fifty students from the Trickster Academy line up for their departure. They wore uniform apricot-yellow vests, the backs embroidered with a crooked "Hack" (a Chinese character for "坑") in croton powder. Soaked in the night's dew, the pink had faded to a light brown. Each student wore a small blue cloth bag hung from their waist, its string half peeking out from the opening. Inside, bulging, someone wondered what "trickster secret treasure" they were holding.
"Remember this," Chen Weiwan said, her hands on her hips, her skirt sweeping across the newly sprouted croton seedlings on the steps. "You're only allowed to pierce people's hearts, not to hurt others! If I find out anyone uses any tricks other than croton powder, I'll punish him by sending him to the croton fields for three months, tickling the seedlings every day!"
"Understood!" The students responded in unison. The noise startled the parrot perched under the eaves, which flapped its wings and shouted at the top of its voice: "It's a rip-off! It's a rip-off!" The servants who were watching laughed so hard that their shoulders shook.
A month later, a fast horse from Nanchu arrived with a battle report. Shen Weiwan tore open the wax seal and saw a crooked little figure drawn with croton powder, being chased by a group of fists. Next to it, written in charcoal, was the message: "First battle a victory! 'Fake Shit' Scheme Defeated Counterfeit Medicine Dealers!"
It turned out that students, disguised as sallow-faced patients, had gathered around a fake medicine stall. The con man was selling an "elixir of immortality" that could cause a person to ascend to heaven in broad daylight. After swallowing the pill, student Zhang San suddenly collapsed, clutching his stomach and screaming, "Ouch! Gold! I'm pooping gold!" He then pulled a sheep dung ball coated in gold powder from his crotch. Onlookers rushed to grab the pills, and the con man's shoes were trampled off. He was eventually taken to the authorities. The pills they found were made entirely of croton powder mixed with yellow earth. The magistrate, enraged, ordered the stall burned on the spot, the faint aroma of croton wafting through the thick smoke.
A month later, the envoy from Southern Chu returned, this time with the ecstasy of having survived a catastrophe. The front of his official uniform was stained with an unidentified brown stain, emitting a faint scent of croton. "Your Highness! Amazing!" he spat. "Your student treated the swindler to 'laxative tea,' and he defecated for three days and three nights at the wedding. Now the whole of Ying knows he has 'leaky intestines,' and his new bride returned home that very same day!"
Chen Weiwan raised her eyebrows smugly and refilled Xiao Yu's croton flower tea, a few dried croton flowers floating in the water. "It's a piece of cake. Tell them to use the 'honey trap' next time - have the female students pretend to be the widows of wealthy merchants, first swindle the scammers out of their wealth, and then hand them over to the authorities!"
Xiao Yu put down the tea bowl, looked at his wife's shining eyes, and said helplessly: "Madam, are you teaching them how to cheat people, or are you personally teaching them the tricks of cheating?"
"It's better to stop a scam with one!" Shen Weiwan sprinkled an extra spoonful of croton powder into his bowl. "It's better than letting the swindlers ride roughshod over the people."
Three months later, an envoy from Southern Chu arrived with an expedited document. The Chinese characters on the bamboo slips were crooked and stained with brown traces reminiscent of croton oil. It read: "Who's the best scammer in Dasheng? Chen Weiwan is second, no one dares to claim first place! Now that the scammers in Southern Chu have turned to farming, the people have composed a song: 'There's a Shen Weiwan in Dasheng, who's so good at scamming people that they call him 'Daddy!'"
Shen Weiwan laughed so hard she nearly fell off her chair, but Xiao Yu was quick to catch her by the waist. "Your Highness, look!" She thrust the bamboo slips in front of Xiao Yu, her fingertips brushing against the jade belt around his waist. "The people of Southern Chu can even compose songs!"
Xiao Yu reluctantly tried to calm her down, his fingertips touching the croton powder on her skirt. "Alright, I know you're capable. The King of Southern Chu said he'd come in person to thank you. How are you going to entertain him?"
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