The early summer sun blazed like fire, scorching the cobblestone streets of the capital. Huddled in the most secluded corner of the second floor of the street-facing "Yue Lai Inn," Li Xiu scratched his knuckles at the dusty cracks in the window lattice as he watched three urchins with ponytails scribble charcoal on his doorway. Next to the crooked inscription "Duan Xiu" (a Chinese character for "cut sleeve"), a lame figure with its butt sticking out was depicted, followed by a fan-waving young man in brocade clothes. The painting was naive, but it was immediately clear that it depicted the embarrassment he had experienced when the Seventh Prince "randomly encountered" him.
"Sir..." The servant huddled at the corner of the table, the greasy bean curd dumpling in his hand still dripping with soup, "How about we go back first? Butcher Wang from West Street is bringing his son to our door to move a whetstone..."
Li Xiu turned back abruptly, his eyes bloodshot, like a ghost just crawling out of a mass grave. He grabbed the chipped wine jug on the table and took a deep gulp. The low-quality liquor burned his throat, but it couldn't suppress the salty sweetness in his heart. "Go back? Where can I go back to?" The liquor dripped from the corner of his mouth and into his worn collar. "I, Li Xiu, have been a noble for generations, and when have I ever suffered such a great humiliation!" The erroneous blood letter from three days ago had become the hottest joke in the capital. Even blind beggars could sing it while clapping bamboo clappers, "Mr. Li, your hands are shaking too much. I'll meet my lover in Qingbai Tower."
He stood up with a thud, his limping leg making a harsh sound on the wooden floor, startling the swallows nesting on the beams. "Get ready! I'm going to the General's Mansion! I want to see how many heads that little bitch Shen Weiwan has!"
Street farce: Stones and rotten leaves flying together
When Li Xiu rushed out of the inn on his bony old horse, a shrill nursery rhyme rang out behind him, like a swarm of flies buzzing: "Li the Lame, the Broken-sleeved Man, has his lover hidden in the Qingbai Tower, his lover breaks his lame leg, he drinks rice soup outside the general's mansion—"
He turned and saw five or six mischievous children chasing him, holding branches. The chubby little boy in the lead was clutching a half-sharp stone, hurling it at him, striking the bronze saddle ornament squarely and startling the old horse back to his feet. Li Xiu barely managed to cling to the horse's neck. He heard laughter erupt from the surrounding shops. A woman selling rouge poked her head out and, deliberately raising her voice, exclaimed, "Look! Qingbai Tower's lover is out for a stroll!"
He gritted his teeth and squeezed the horse's belly as the lame old horse stumbled forward. Behind him, the curses seemed to have wings: "The lame bastard is crossing the street—" Rotten vegetable leaves and melon seed shells rained down on him. A piece of sour watermelon rind smeared precisely on the back of his head, and red juice flowed down his hair, sticky like blood. Passing by a silk shop, the owner unexpectedly tied a handkerchief embroidered with the words "Duanxiu" to a bamboo pole and waved it at him with great amusement: "Mr. Li, take a look! It's a Qingbailou exclusive. Buy one, get one free!"
Li Xiu felt as if his face had been burned by a branding iron. He tried to draw his sword, but discovered it had been pawned by a debt collector a few days earlier. The old horse, startled, neighed repeatedly as it carried him down a narrow alley. The laughter behind him grew louder and louder, as if the entire capital city was clinging to the walls to watch him laugh.
[Ambush at the Alley: Beggars' "Welcome Ceremony"]
As soon as he turned into the quiet alley, Li Xiu heard a chaotic sound of footsteps ahead. A dozen ragged beggars suddenly emerged from under the wall. The old beggar in the lead was leaning on a polished jujube wood cane. Around his neck hung a wooden sign that read "Qingbailou VIP." A half-length red silk ribbon was tied to the corner of the sign, making him dizzy.
"That's him! The Broken-Sleeved Lame Guy!" The old beggar waved his cane, his toothless mouth grinning. A group of beggars immediately surrounded him, holding up broken bowls and shouting, "The Broken-Sleeved Guy is here! The lover of Qingbai Tower is here!"
Li Xiu reined in his horse, shocked and angry: "What do you want to do? I'm a family friend of the Minister of Personnel!"
"Minister of Personnel?" The old beggar tilted his head to look at him, and suddenly spat, "That old fellow threw copper coins into my broken bowl yesterday! Brothers, this cripple owes us three months' begging money!"
Before he could finish his words, beggars rushed over, some pulling at the horse's reins, some grabbing its legs, and some even smearing soda from the bottom of a pot on his face. Li Xiu heard them shouting in unison: "Give me money, you bastard! Have fun in Qingbai Tower! If you don't pay, I'll break your legs!" The old horse was so frightened that it kicked its front hooves wildly. Li Xiu tried desperately to control the reins, but the old beggars had a firm grip on the stirrups.
"Let go!" He pulled out the only remaining dagger from his waist, but a little beggar who was holding his leg bit his trouser leg. "If you don't let go, I will kill you!"
"Murder! The lame man with the broken sleeves is killing people!" The beggars scattered, but gathered at the entrance of the alley, clapping their hands and shouting, which soon attracted more people to watch the excitement. Li Xiu looked at the crowds pouring in from all directions, listening to the shouts of "The lame man with the broken sleeves is killing people" one after another, and felt dizzy and his stomach churning. He whipped the old horse hard, and the lame horse felt the pain and carried him away from the crowd and ran away. Behind him, he heard the beggars' uniform shouts of "The lame man with the broken sleeves is running away - the lame man with the broken sleeves is running away with his tail between his legs -"
[Qinghui Courtyard, General's Mansion: The Seventh Prince's "Eating Melon" Moment]
Under the grape trellis in Qinghui Courtyard, Chen Weiwan was picking lychees sent as tribute from Lingnan with a silver stick. Ting Chuntao laughed so hard that she fell backwards, and even the handkerchief in her hand fell to the ground.
"Miss, you didn't see it!" Chun Tao wiped the tears of laughter, "Li Xiu was chased by beggars until one of his shoes ran away! The old beggar chased him for three blocks holding a 'Qingbailou VIP' sign, and in the end, it was the patrolmen who came to help and rescued him!"
Chen Weiwan laughed out loud, and the lychee seeds fell into the jade dish with a ding: "Did you give the old beggar enough reward?"
"I gave it to you!" Chuntao nodded immediately. "Five cents each, and I even gave the old beggar a bunch of candied haws! He said that next time there's something exciting like this, he'll definitely come and tell us in advance!"
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