At three quarters past midnight, a steaming steamed bun was placed on the elm wood table in the general's kitchen. No one had time to eat it. Mrs. Liu, the dishwasher, clutched a loofah and whispered to the fire-stoking girl, "Did you hear? A thief was caught in the front yard last night!"
"What kind of thief?" The fire-making girl shoved firewood into the stove, sparks flying onto her apron. "Is there anyone stealing that pile of junk in the warehouse?"
"He's not a thief who stole things!" Mrs. Liu lowered her voice, the wrinkles at the corners of her eyes squeezed together, "He's a thief who stole chili powder!"
"Puff!" The fire-making girl laughed so hard that she dropped the tongs on the ground. "Madame Liu, you're such a storyteller! What thief wouldn't steal gold, silver, and chili powder in the middle of the night?"
"I lied to you, you little dog!" Granny Liu pointed to the sky and the ground. "I got up late last night and saw a patrolman escorting a man to the woodshed. The smell was overwhelming! I could smell chili powder mixed with rotten water from three alleys away. The man was sneezing as he walked, 'A-choo, A-choo' like a cannon!"
The words spread like wings, following the flow of rice water throughout the general's mansion. A yard boy who was sweeping the yard ran into the water carrier and hefted his shoulder pole onto his shoulder: "Hey, did you hear? When that thief was caught, he was covered in chili powder, even his nostrils were emitting red foam!"
The water bearer slammed the bucket onto the ground, splashing water that soaked the servant's trouser legs. "I also heard that the thief was wearing black clothes, the same material as the nightgown in Madam Liu's room!"
When the news reached Liu, she was plucking her gray hair in front of a bronze mirror. Lu'e came in with a copper basin. The bottom of the basin was still stained with chili powder residue. She placed the basin on the dressing table with a clang. "Madam, everyone is talking about...about you last night..."
"What's going on?!" Liu turned around abruptly, her gold-and-jade armor scraping against the bronze mirror, revealing her distorted face. The scene of the chili powder choking her last night was still vivid in her mind. This morning, her nose was burning with pain, and even her eyes were swollen.
"Rumor has it... they caught a thief who stole chili powder, and he smells like your room..." Lu'e lowered her head, not daring to look at Liu's sullen face. The servants' tittering outside the window pierced Liu's heart like needles.
"Bullshit!" Liu grabbed the jade comb from the table and threw it at Lu'e. Lu'e dodged to the side in fear. The comb hit the door with a clang, breaking two teeth. "Go! Call all those gossiping little hooves here, or I'll tear their mouths apart!"
"Madam, you can't do this!" Lu'e hurriedly supported her, "If this matter gets out of hand, wouldn't it be confirmed..." Before she finished speaking, she saw Liu's face turn from blue to white, and from white to red, and finally she was shaking with anger.
At this moment, Shen Weiwan's clear voice came from outside the courtyard gate: "Aunt! I'm here to bring you tonic!"
When Liu heard this, she felt like she was biting her teeth. She took a deep breath and, pretending to be calm, straightened her clothes. "Let her in."
Chen Weiwan was wearing a water-green skirt and holding a gilded lacquer box. Behind her was Chuntao, who was holding a medicine jar. As soon as she entered, she fanned her nose exaggeratedly: "Oh, Auntie, why does your room smell so bad? Like... like chili powder mixed with leeks?"
In order to suppress the spicy smell in her nose this morning, Liu had specially asked the kitchen to make leek boxes. When Shen Weiwan pointed this out in public, her face flushed. She looked at the lacquer box in Shen Weiwan's hand and said unhappily, "What tonic?"
"I specially asked the kitchen to make this 'Nasal Clearing and Qi Replenishing Soup'!" Chen Weiwan smiled, her eyes curved as she opened the lacquer box to reveal the dark medicinal soup inside. "I heard there was a thief in the mansion last night, and he reeked of chili powder all over. I was worried you might be frightened. Look, this soup contains asarum and angelica, which are perfect for clearing the nasal passages!"
Chun Tao added thoughtfully, "The young lady said that after drinking this soup, you'll sneeze a hundred or eighty times, and it'll get rid of all the bad luck in your stomach!"
Liu looked at the bowl of strange-smelling medicinal soup and recalled the agonizing pain she'd felt the night before from the chili flakes. Her stomach churned. She fought back her nausea and forced a smile that was uglier than tears. "Wanwan is so thoughtful, but I'm a bit dizzy this morning, so I'm afraid she can't handle this soup."
"Oh, Auntie, please don't be polite!" Shen Weiwan opened her eyes wide in pretending to be surprised, "I specially asked the old housekeeper to watch over me while I made this soup. I said it was a secret recipe that would make thieves avoid it! Look," she pointed at the red pepper floating in the soup, "I took this pepper from the warehouse, I guarantee it's strong enough!"
When Liu heard the word "warehouse", her eyelids jumped. She looked at Shen Weiwan's innocent face and suddenly realized that this was not a tonic, but a slap in the face! Those rumors about the "thief who stole the chili powder" must have been spread by this little hoof!
"I think you should drink it while it's hot, Auntie." Shen Weiwan pushed the medicine bowl towards Liu, and the hot steam with a strong smell of medicine hit her face. "If you don't drink it, the servants will say that I, as your niece, am unfilial. Look," she deliberately raised her voice, "even Chuntao blew it cool for you!"
Chuntao blew into the medicine bowl in cooperation, muttering, "Drink it quickly, Madam, and you will stop sneezing..."
Liu looked at the servants around her trying to suppress their laughter and felt mortified. She slammed the table so hard that the soup in the medicine bowl spilled out. "That's enough! I won't drink it!"
Shen Weiwan cried out, "Ouch!" and hurriedly tried to pick up the medicine bowl, but she accidentally knocked it over, spilling the dark soup all over Liu. "Auntie, I'm sorry! I didn't mean to!" She apologized, but a sly glint flashed in her eyes. "Look, this soup spilled on you, it's just like what happened to that thief last night!"
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