Chu Cheng nodded, but suddenly remembered his previous question, "Where did you get the knife? Where did the conflict start?"
"It's right at the door." Ji Qingzhou did not hide it from him, "The knife is in my pocket. I have always had the habit of carrying it with me, but you don't have to worry. It's just a knife, a large utility knife that can be put in your pocket. If Fang Yaoxuan hadn't forced me to do it this time, I would definitely not use it. I know my limits."
Chu Cheng was stunned. He had been with Ji Qingzhou for a year, but he had never known that Ji Qingzhou had this habit.
"So, you brought it with you when we were together?"
"Sometimes I bring it, sometimes I don't." Ji Qingzhou said, "I only started bringing it after I separated from you."
When he was with Chu Cheng, he felt at ease most of the time because he knew Chu Cheng's background and skills were very strong, and sometimes he would not bring it with him. But after he separated from Chu Cheng, he habitually put the knife back into his pocket, just like he did before, thinking that if he encountered something he couldn't do anything about, at least he would have a way out.
"Just put it in your pocket?"
Ji Qingzhou nodded, "This way it will be easier to take when you need it."
Chu Cheng felt that he had thought it through very carefully. "I didn't know you had this habit before."
Ji Qingzhou thought for a moment, then slowly said to him, "You know, I grew up with my mother. When my parents divorced, I was just in the first grade of junior high school. I have never had any brothers or sisters. My father moved out after the divorce, leaving only my mother and I. I started to think that there should be no difference, but then I slowly realized that there is a difference. I used to tell my mother about my troubles, but I stopped later because I felt that she had worked very hard. Others have fathers and brothers and sisters, and when they are angry, there are people who stand up for them and protect them, but I don't, so I should protect myself."
"I've taken a Sanda class before, do you believe it?"
Chu Cheng shook his head, "I really can't tell."
"Because it's the right time to learn it, it's very simple, not even the basics. I just remember our teacher asked us to run for 20 minutes every time we went, so I kept practicing running. I thought that as long as I ran fast enough, no one could hit me." Ji Qingzhou said with a smile.
Chu Cheng also smiled when he heard this, "That's the truth."
"I was still in school at that time, and my main job was studying. Our school was very strict, and sometimes I had to go to class on Saturdays, and I had several papers to write every day. On weekends, I wanted to stay at home with my mother, so I didn't have much time to do other things. I only took a few Sanda classes and gave up."
"Later, one time, I went out to play with my classmate. My classmate likes knives, and if he sees a suitable one, he will buy one for collection. I thought I could buy one, too. I don't usually use it, so I put it in my pocket. If someone wants to bully me and I can't beat them, at least I can leave myself a way out. Otherwise, if the other party doesn't know how to control his strength and sees that I'm easy to bully because of my age, he will bully me violently. What should I do? I still have my mother. If I die, she will be left alone."
Ji Qingzhou finished speaking and looked at Chu Cheng quietly.
"So, when you came home with me, you also had a knife in your pocket? It seems that I was quite lucky that you didn't pull a knife on me."
Ji Qingzhou shook his head, "No."
He didn't even have one during that period. He had just come here and hadn't had time to buy one. Later, after spending some time with Chu Cheng, he bought one. It was just because this knife had never been used in his life in the previous two years, so he didn't tell Chu Cheng.
He thought he would never use this knife, but unexpectedly, he would use it anyway.
"I don't actually want to use it." Ji Qingzhou whispered, "Even if it's Fang Yaoxuan, I don't want to use it. This is always a bad behavior, I don't want this."
Chu Cheng saw him lower his head silently while talking, so he reached out and hugged him in his arms, comforting him: "I know you have no choice, you are just trying to protect yourself, it's okay."
Ji Qingzhou was a little sad. He leaned against Chu Cheng and felt his heart getting sour bit by bit. He hated Fang Yaoxuan, but he never thought of hurting Fang Yaoxuan. He mostly avoided and argued with Fang Yaoxuan. The only time he slapped Fang Yaoxuan was because Fang Yaoxuan raised his hand to hit him first. But now, because of Fang Yaoxuan, he did something he didn't want to do.
If only he hadn't opened the door for Fang Yaoxuan, Ji Qingzhou thought, if only he hadn't angered Fang Yaoxuan, and he had just used him, or even if Fang Yao hadn't drunk and wasn't angered by him, and hadn't thought of doing those things. But there weren't so many ifs in this world, so he could only put his mind at ease and move on.
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