Chapter 420 Heart-to-heart Talk (Script 6)
This realization was like a strong light that wanted to shine into Shen Xiangyang's heart, revealing the undercurrent that had never been seen before.
A long silence stretched between the two.
Just when Gu Xi thought Shen Xiangyang would remain silent or simply close his eyes and pretend to sleep as before, an extremely weak, dry and hoarse voice rang out in the infirmary: "...Water."
Gu Xi's body shook and he turned around suddenly.
He saw Shen Xiangyang slightly turn his head, his eyes falling on the water cup on the bedside table.
There was no longer the coldness in those eyes, but instead a cautious temptation.
Gu Xi walked over almost at the same time, picked up the water cup, clumsily inserted the straw, and handed it to Shen Xiangyang's lips.
His movement in handing over the water cup was very stiff, but it was accompanied by a concentration that he himself was not even aware of.
Shen Xiangyang took small sips of water from Gu Xi's hand. The warm liquid slid across his dry throat, bringing a touch of comfort and seeming to moisten something that had been dry for a long time.
Neither of them spoke.
The only sound in the infirmary was the faint sound of the straw.
After feeding the water, Gu Xi put down the cup, but did not leave immediately.
He pulled up a nearby chair and sat down heavily, resting his hands on his knees and lowering his head.
The dim light of the infirmary cast a deep shadow on his face: "Hello..."
Gu Xi finally spoke, his voice low and hoarse, his voice full of the tiredness of a broken jar, "You... do you really hate me?"
He didn’t look at Shen Xiangyang, but lowered his head as if talking to himself: “I annoy you all day long, bump into your things, say unpleasant words, and even make you faint…”
Shen Xiangyang didn't say anything, but just looked at the back of his head quietly. The always arrogant Gu Xi now revealed a deep loneliness and helplessness.
"I know you look down on me..."
Gu Xi's voice lowered, with a bitter taste of self-mockery: "You think I'm just a idiot who relies on my family's money to play basketball and cause trouble, right?"
He raised his head, his eyes unfocused as he looked at the thick darkness outside the window. The corners of his mouth curved into an unsightly arc. "Actually, sometimes I feel the same way..."
Gu Xi took a deep breath, as if he had made up his mind. His voice trembled slightly. "My family looks good, but it's actually rotten. My dad is busy with business and social events and rarely cares about me. My mom...she already has her own new life and her own new family...As for me...I'm probably just a superfluous existence..."
Gu Xi's Adam's apple rolled, as if he was swallowing some unspeakable bitterness, "I am always alone at home, it's so empty, even my words echo..."
His voice was getting hoarse. "That's why I hate going home so much. I hang out outside all day, hanging out with a bunch of people, as if that would make things seem more lively... but it's actually quite boring..."
Gu Xi didn't know why he said this.
Maybe he had kept these things in his heart for too long, and he urgently needed to find someone to talk to; maybe he saw Shen Xiangyang's embarrassed side, worried that Shen Xiangyang didn't know how to face him, so he told his worries; maybe he saw the scars on Shen Xiangyang's body, so he came up with this clumsy way to comfort Shen Xiangyang...
Shen Xiangyang pursed his lips and said nothing.
Gu Xi smiled self-deprecatingly, his smile looking particularly fragile under the dim light: "Shen Xiangyang, in fact, I have always owed you an apology..."
"Why do you say that?"
Shen Xiangyang looked at Gu Xi opposite him, and when he spoke he realized that his voice was unusually hoarse.
"That time at the alley entrance, I didn't mean to make fun of you. I was arguing with my dad on the phone. He had clearly promised to come home for dinner, but he didn't come back..."
Gu Xi's voice was filled with guilt. "I was so angry that I was arguing with my dad. I didn't see who was in the alley or what happened. It was a long time after the incident that I found out from others that it was you..."
It’s a pity that it was too late by then.
He and Shen Xiangyang have broken off their friendship.
It's not that Gu Xi hasn't thought about apologizing, but every time he saw Shen Xiangyang's cold eyes, the words of apology got stuck in his throat and he swallowed them back awkwardly.
Gu Xi looked at Shen Xiangyang, his eyes were very complicated, with regret and guilt in them: "I'm sorry, although it's a little late...but I really...didn't mean it..."
Gu Xi's words hit Shen Xiangyang's heart hard.
As he listened to Gu Xi recounting what had happened before, his heart felt as if it were being tightly gripped by an invisible hand, causing it to ache.
A hint of water appeared under Gu Xi's drooping eyelashes.
Shen Xiangyang looked at Gu Xi's handsome face, and the high wall that had been built in his heart for a long time finally collapsed at this moment.
Shen Xiangyang’s lips moved, but his throat seemed to be blocked by something.
He struggled for a long time, so long that Gu Xi thought he would not speak again. Then a very soft but extremely clear voice rang out: "In the first year of high school..."
Shen Xiangyang’s voice was very low: “I was blocked in the alley by them and asked for money…That’s not the first time…”
He closed his eyes, his long eyelashes casting a fragile shadow on his pale face. "I went through that in junior high too. Those people... stole my money... laughed at me... said my father didn't love me, my mother didn't care for me... and that I was a bastard that no one wanted..."
The word "bastard" hurt Gu Xi.
He didn't know where he got the courage from, and hugged Shen Xiangyang gently.
Shen Xiangyang's fingers, which were placed outside the quilt, curled up slightly. His fingertips were cold, and his voice dropped: "The scar on my arm was left at that time... I thought... when I went to high school, everything would be different..."
Shen Xiangyang was very naive at that time. He always thought that he could escape all troubles by growing up, but unfortunately, things did not go as he wished.
Having said that, Shen Xiangyang slowly looked at Gu Xi.
Those beautiful eyes were no longer cold, but instead contained pain and fear that had been suppressed for too long: "So that day... when I saw you... I thought... you would help me... but... "
He didn't say anything else.
But Gu Xi already knew what he was going to say next.
Shen Xiangyang's indifference, loneliness, and fear of crowds are rooted in his dark past of being bullied.
Gu Xi's "failure to help" became the last straw that broke the camel's back, causing him to completely shut himself off.
Shen Xiangyang raised his arm with difficulty, which was covered with old scars. His fingertips trembled as he pointed to the chair where Gu Xi had just sat - where his old schoolbag, which had been washed so much that it looked white, was placed.
"in……"
His voice became even softer, with a kind of exhaustion that made him give up everything. "I have medicine... help me..."
Gu Xi's heart felt like it was being grabbed by an ice-cold hand, making it feel sore and painful.
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