More than a month later, I returned home again and told my mother about my discharge from the army.
Her first reaction was surprise. "What? Why did you retire? Then all the money and tickets will be gone?"
"Mom, what are you thinking about? If you don't go back to the army, where will you get the money? It just so happens that the fourth brother has come back, so you can have a good rest. You've also found a wife, so try to have a baby soon."
My brother was talking but he never looked at me. I knew he felt guilty about what happened before.
I didn't tell them the truth about my discharge from the army. It was my own business anyway. Do I really expect my mother to feel guilty about me for getting me into trouble?
I told them that I had found a job in the commune and that it would not be my time to rest in the future and I would not come back often.
After hearing that I had a job, my mother's face became better and she asked hurriedly, "How much can I get in a month?"
I felt helpless, but there was nothing I could do. I couldn't tell my family what I was doing, and I couldn't trust any of my family members.
I nodded and said, "I will get paid, but not as much as in the army. I will keep five dollars for myself every month and give the rest to mom."
She was happy then and started to get me some food.
Sometimes I feel very confused. Is she really my biological mother?
Fortunately, I am no longer at the age where I need much attention from my parents. If she doesn’t value me, then it doesn’t matter if she likes money. It’s fine too.
At least when I grow up I don't have to be polite and talk nonsense to her about the deep mother-son love. It's enough to just pretend. Saving face is more important than anything else.
After I finished talking to them, my eyes began to look for my young wife inadvertently.
I don’t know whether she has been wronged or bullied at home during this month, or whether the people at the educated youth site have made things difficult for her.
"Are you looking for your wife?" The eldest sister-in-law came over and joked, "She's fine. She's taking care of the kids."
I felt a little uncomfortable and immediately denied it, "I didn't look for her. I was just checking to see if there were any changes at home during this period of time."
"I understand, I understand." She gave me a meaningful look and then went about her own business.
Afterwards, my eldest brother asked me to go out for a walk, and I agreed. No matter what the reason was that he helped my mother to plot against me before, he is my eldest brother after all, and he raised me.
He took me to the hill where I often picked wild fruits when I was a child, and looked at me guiltily, "Old Four, I didn't mean to come home last time. I also wanted you to get married."
In fact, I don't blame him. He has lived in this mountain village all his life and has limited experience. He agreed after being persuaded by my mother.
I should say that there is no one in this family that I have the right to be angry with. Although I grew up without the love of my father and mother, my brothers are good to me after all. My mother, who has always been mean to me, gave birth to me after all. My sisters-in-law have nothing to do with me, so I can't blame them.
For me, this incident means I have lost an opportunity to continue my development in the army, but it is also good to be able to help Political Commissar Lu through this matter.
It was like a blind cat catching a dead mouse by accident, and I was able to stay in my hometown directly, unlike some of my comrades who had to go to other cities after demobilization.
"It's okay, big brother. No matter what happens, we are still brothers. I just hope that we can still be honest with each other in the future."
We didn’t say anything more after that. Maybe everyone has changed a little during the years when I was in the army, but I believe that people’s nature will not change, and my brother is still the brother I respect the most.
On the way back, my brother told me a lot about my wife at home, praising her for her education and good temper.
Knowing that I would be concerned about the follow-up of the educated youth who came to my house to cause trouble on the day I left, he told me about it.
But when it came to how my wife handled the situation, he was a little hesitant.
"It's okay, big brother, just tell me, no matter what, she is my wife, I will take her to get the marriage certificate someday, I will slowly teach her the things she doesn't know, and I hope you will be more understanding, after all, she is an educated youth, she may not understand many things."
After hearing what I said, my eldest brother finally spoke out, "Fourth Brother, to be honest, the wife that mother found for you is really good in every way. Your eldest sister-in-law praises her like a flower to you every day, but she is a little confused sometimes."
"There was an educated youth named Chen Panpan in that educated youth camp. She had a very good relationship with my sister-in-law. It seemed like they were from the same place. He coaxed my sister-in-law into doing this and that. The time when the educated youth came to our house to cause trouble was instigated by Chen Panzi. Even for this matter, my sister-in-law was able to coax her. Fourth brother, you have to keep a closer eye on Chen Panpan."
I nodded to show that I understood, and in my mind I was slowly thinking about how I could make my wife break off contact with the educated youth that my eldest brother had mentioned.
After all, I won't be at home often in the future, so I don't have the time to keep an eye on her. My family members are not obligated to help me keep an eye on her, so I can only let her see clearly that her good friend is not a good friend, but a jackal.
When I got home, my wife saw that my face was red. She took one look at me and then lowered her head, not daring to look at me again.
During the meal, my mother was quite nice to her. The porridge for everyone else was the thinnest, but hers was at least half dry.
I felt a little relieved. It seemed that my mother was still very concerned about the education of my nephews and nieces, and she knew that she couldn't let their teachers go hungry.
When I returned to the room at night, I wanted to have a good talk with my wife about the things happening in the village, but she just shrank into the corner like a frightened little rabbit.
She trembled when I got close to her.
Maybe she was frightened by what happened that night. At that time, I believed that she and my mother were plotting against me, and I had no sympathy for her at all. It was normal for her to be afraid of me.
"Go to sleep."
I didn't do any excessive movements. I just lay down outside the bed, straightened my body and closed my eyes.
Perhaps because she saw that I really had no intention of violating her, she lay down carefully, stealing glances at me from time to time, and her gaze was very obvious.
I was both angry and amused. She was so timid, being schemed against every day, and yet she was so easy to appease after being schemed against. She forgave others so easily. Who else could she scheme against if not her? If she didn't scheme against her, who could she scheme against?
Forget it, take your time. It takes some time to train the little white rabbit into a big bad wolf.
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