Lu Sinian sat on the single sofa by the window, waiting for her quietly.
With his back to the bathroom door and facing the sea, his eyes were deep and his mind was in turmoil.
Only the quiet sound of dripping water could be heard faintly in my ears.
The clothes he bought for Su Xiaoli yesterday have been ironed and hung in the closet.
The jewelry, watches, shoes and bags were all placed in other cabinets, and Su Xiaoli did not touch them.
She just picked up a black silk shirt and a pair of black high-waisted wide-leg pants and put them on.
"Let's go." She put on the necklace with the diamond ring.
The pure diamond was faintly visible under the black collar, and her sleeves were casually rolled up to her elbows.
The two got on bus 959, and Lu Sinian drove her aimlessly around the streets of Hong Kong Island. Su Xiaoli's eyes were always looking out the window, but in fact they were not focused.
The weather was gloomy and there were mottled shadows of people.
Tired of driving, Lu Sinian parked the car on the side of the road and took her for a slow walk.
On Hennessy Road in Wan Chai, Su Xiaoli paused slightly when passing by a loft bookstore.
Land in Hong Kong is extremely expensive, rents are high, and the houses are cramped and connected like pigeon coops.
The population is dense, and each floor is packed with tenants of different identities and experiences.
Most bookstores are hidden in downtown areas, on the second, third, or even seventh or eighth floors.
The altitude was getting closer and closer to heaven, but the situation was falling straight to hell.
No matter how high it moves to, it will still be commonly called the "second-floor bookstore" or "attic bookstore."
These bookstores are hidden in the area and difficult to find unless you are looking for them.
Lu Sinian had never been here before, but the books he wanted to read were always delivered to him.
Su Xiaoli walked up the stairs step by step, her steps slightly unsteady. The stairs were narrow and dark, so she had to turn left and right before she could enter.
Lu Sinian has always been protecting her behind her.
Once you enter the room, you will immediately feel a different world and the fragrance of books.
A place that connects the East and the West, the refined and the vulgar, and the old and the new. It has outdated yearbooks and old books, as well as the latest classics or popular novels from various countries...
Except for the thread-bound books with literary and historical collection value which are stored separately, all others are mixed on the dozen or so bookshelves above the ceiling.
For a moment, Su Xiaoli even felt that she could stay here forever.
Quietly waiting for the end of a game of chess.
It's not unacceptable.
Books are forever entangled with life and death in the human world.
Even in the turbulent times, warmth can be seen on cold nights.
She continued walking, looking at one shelf of books after another, with her neck raised high, or squatting completely on the ground.
Pull out one book after another.
Lu Sinian's eyes followed her the whole time. The girl's face looked even paler in her black clothes, and her excessive mental fatigue made her look light and fluttery.
The lines are thinner and purer.
He thought about it, turned around, went downstairs to make a phone call, and came back up more than half an hour later.
Lu Sinian asked the clerk for a cart, silently picked up the dozen or so books at Su Xiaoli's feet and put them on the cart.
The books put in one by one had quite mixed contents.
The most common is Western philosophy, but there are also Buddhism, Taoism, Laozi, Guan, Military, Legalism, Confucianism, and a lot of economics and psychology...
The cart gradually filled up, and some of the authors and book titles were even unheard of by Lu Sinian.
There were even a lot of banned books in the basket, ranging from political, mystical, social, to erotic...
Su Xiaoli finally found an old sofa by the window and sat down. She picked up a thin booklet on the top of the cart, which was the English translation of "The Myth of Sisyphus: On the Absurd".
The title page contains a black-and-white photo of Camus, a charming middle-aged man, holding a half-smoked cigarette in his mouth.
It's also beautiful.
The air-conditioning in the bookstore was sufficient, and cool air was circulating. Behind the sofa was a worn wall cloth, and outside were rusty iron window bars and a window covered with a spider web.
In the quiet isolation from the world, she immersed herself in the book.
In the scattered light and dark in half the room, the delicate lines of the side face, facing the water and the flowers, are particularly cool.
Lu Sinian sat next to her and picked up a book.
"So Enduring Romance - Hong Kong Island Love/Sex History".
Lu Sinian:...!
His handsome face suddenly turned red. He tilted his head and saw that Su Xiaoli didn't pay any attention to him at all. She was half leaning on the sofa, concentrating on reading.
He gritted his teeth, but his eyes couldn't help but glance at the books he had never touched before.
Su Xiaoli turned the pages of the book in her hand one by one, and scenes flashed through her mind.
All the memories of two lifetimes, distant and vivid, accumulate real feelings.
She was questioning the...absurd game that "God" was playing with her.
No matter whether you become an adult again in this life, life always has an end.
The inevitable would come to her again.
Yes, she thought about giving up and surrendering.
But in the end, she still wanted to choose: to give herself the choice.
——I don’t want to play this game within the boundaries that I was forced to draw.
OK, then accept it first.
No matter what fate you accept, the key is to stay alive. She hopes she can hold on so that she can go further before falling.
Even if you go in the wrong direction, your steps will be heavy.
——When the boulder no longer became a torment in Sisyphus' heart, the gods no longer let the boulder roll down from the top of the mountain.
A strong sense of pain is also a kind of existence.
The contents of the book and Su Xiaoli's own wishes were integrated into Camus's pen, dissolved into a ball of transparent colorless air, and inhaled into Su Xiaoli's lungs bit by bit.
——Face the bleakness head-on, and do what you know is impossible in the absurdity.
No matter what, apart from the cold and lonely fate, there is still the sunshine of reality to warm our bodies.
It doesn't matter.
Rebirth, such a mysterious word.
For Su Xiaoli, it was not just a physical rebirth, but also God inviting her to experience true spiritual rebirth.
In the face of the unchangeable fate and uncontrollable environment, you have complete control over yourself.
Express yourself truthfully, seek boldly, and don’t avoid the pain of not getting what you want.
What's more, she seemed to hear a voice whispering:
"Neither life nor death, neither death nor life."
I finished reading a thin book in half an afternoon.
Thunder rumbled.
It seems like a lifetime ago.
Screw it.
She jumped out.
Su Xiaoli closed the book gently, her nose and eyes felt hot, but her brows relaxed.
When I opened my shoulders, I could hear the sound of bones and joints cracking.
She took a deep breath and her eyes inadvertently swept over Lu Sinian.
He was reading a book intently.
Well, unmoved by any circumstances.
Su Xiaoli couldn't help but look over. The title of the book was interesting, "So Much Romance - A History of Love and Sex in Hong Kong Island".
She smiled and said, "How about this book?"
Lu Sinian - "A pi across the river".
In a panic, he slammed the book shut, immediately sat up straight, and looked straight ahead, "Not bad..."
"Tell me what you wrote later. Maybe I can understand some information about the Lin family from the side." Su Xiaoli smiled.
The girl unloaded the burden from her heart, and she was no longer depressed. She was left with peace and calmness, and her eyes were shining.
There is more ease and casualness in the behavior.
It took Lu Sinian a while to figure out what was going on. "Lin family?"
Su Xiaoli's eyes were clear and she nodded.
Those who kill life never die, and those who give life never live. As for things, there is nothing that it cannot defeat, and nothing that it cannot welcome; there is nothing that it cannot destroy, and there is nothing that it cannot accomplish. - "Zhuangzi·Inner Chapter·Great Master"
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