Chapter 2: Letter in the Sleeve
"Deng Deng is the most precious treasure in our palace. We fought for our lives on the battlefield. Isn't it just for Deng Deng to live a peaceful and happy life?"
In a trance, she was still a babbling child, held in the arms of her loving grandmother, her grandfather's rough hands, which were used to holding weapons, gently scratched her nose, and her parents were arm in arm and smiling around her.
The world was bathed in a brilliant warm orange.
Young Qiandeng opened his innocent eyes wide and said joyfully, "Yes, the Changhua Palace will always be peaceful and harmonious, and the glory of my father and grandfather will always protect me..."
But in a flash, a murderous aura rushed out from the broken right eyebrow and pounced towards the relatives who were talking and laughing in front of her.
Relatives turned into bloody shadows, floating away in the dark night.
Qiandeng suddenly opened his eyes, struggled out of the dark dream, gasped for breath, and lifted the bed curtains.
It was getting light outside, and the candlelight illuminated the room with warm light.
Although her mother told her not to think too much, how could she sleep well on the eve of such a big event as choosing a son-in-law?
The nightmare that had haunted her for three years spread before her eyes like a black fog, refusing to retreat.
She hugged the cloth tiger tightly in her arms, drowning her face and rapid breathing in the tiger stuffed with soft fabric.
Every night after the coup, she would see before her eyes her grandfather who had shielded her from a hail of arrows, her father who had been trampled to pieces and whose body could not be recovered, and her grandmother who had passed away suddenly from grief upon hearing the news...
Also, the blood rushed into her eyes, covering the entire world in front of her, and together with the bright flames, dyed the entire world blood red.
Was she the murderer who had killed her family? Would she bring misfortune to others?
The thirteen-year-old girl had to cling to her mother for a long time before she could fall asleep. She wanted to hold on to her only remaining relative to ward off the nightmare that suffocated her.
But later she found that she always strangled her mother unconsciously in her dreams, making her unable to sleep every night.
One night, Qian Deng woke up from a nightmare and looked at his mother's haggard face in the dim light. He hated himself unconsciously.
She pushed her mother out and cried, saying that Dengdeng has grown up and should sleep alone. She never wants to sleep with her mother again!
The mother got out of bed and stood beside the bed, looking at her with tears in her eyes for a long time.
She closed her eyes and pretended to be asleep. Even though half of her body was numb, she refused to move.
Her mother quietly spent a day sewing this half-human-length cloth tiger for her and stuffed it in her arms before she went to bed.
"Deng Deng, this was sewn for you by your mother. Hold it, just like you would hold your mother. Let it accompany you to sleep peacefully. If you have any nightmares or evil spirits, the tiger will eat them all for you..."
From then on, Qiandeng never let go of the cloth tiger in her dreams. Even now that she is sixteen years old, she still does so every night.
When all the pain and sorrow gradually disappeared, she took a deep breath and let go of the cloth tiger.
It was still dark outside, and Qiandeng did not disturb the maid on night watch. He stood up, put on a narrow-sleeved singlet, grabbed the two silver pistols hidden in the cabinet, and practiced for a while on the flat ground in front of the hall.
My grandfather, the King of Changhua, once held two spears and single-handedly fought his way through the ranks of thousands of enemies, earning him a great reputation and being hailed as the best fighter in the army.
After the death of his grandfather and father, Qiandeng regretted countless times why he was so weak and incompetent.
If... if she could protect herself, if she had followed her father and grandfather's practice since she was young, would she not have needed her grandfather to sacrifice himself to protect her during that palace coup?
From then on, she tried hard to recall the double-gun techniques her father and grandfather had taught her, and practiced the family martial arts seriously.
It was a pity that she had been spoiled from childhood until she was thirteen, and her skeleton had already been shaped. No matter how hard she tried now, she could not become a master. She could only try her best not to indulge in regret.
After finishing a set of gun training, she sweated a little and went to the side room to get some water to wash up. When she returned to her room, she heard her mother sighing from the inner room.
"This kid, why is he still acting as he pleases on such a big day?"
Qian Deng raised her eyebrows and smiled, then walked to the floor-standing shade. Just as she was about to call her mother, she heard her voice softly: "...I'm always feeling uneasy in my heart. Xuanji, what kind of husband will Deng Deng choose?"
Her hand stopped behind the curtain, and she stood silently listening to the worry in her mother's tone.
Aunt Xuanji, the palace's female historian, said in a gentle voice, "Madam, don't worry. These gentlemen have been carefully selected from hundreds of candidates by the imperial court. No matter who the county lady chooses, he will surely be the best choice."
Thinking about what she had seen yesterday, her mother sighed softly, "That being said, Deng Deng's reputation has been spread so badly that... you've seen the list of names of this group of people. Although they are all good-looking and decent, they're always lacking in some ways and don't come from good families..."
Aunt Xuanji comforted her gently, "It's not bad to be from a humble family. After marriage, the man can live with the county lady in the palace for the rest of his life. If the man's family is too high, the in-laws' and hers will clash, which will only lead to discord. Besides, a man of humble origins will naturally be more gentle and considerate. He can accompany the county lady to enjoy the mistress's caress, and have a group of children to raise in the palace. The mistress and the county lady will live a happy life. Why bother with the empty title of family background?"
The lady's voice relaxed a little, "That's true. But I don't know why my heart is always beating and turbulent, and I can't find peace."
Aunt Xuanji laughed and said, "Madam, you are truly like someone who raises a daughter for a hundred years, but is always worried about her ninety-nine. The county lady has a mansion, farms, a salary, and ceremonial guards. Even her husband is sent to her so she can choose freely. Is there anyone in this world who could be more satisfied than her?"
The mother also laughed: "Alas, it might still be because of that letter. I always think that Deng Deng's fate will be determined by this letter. I don't know how to choose for her, where to go..."
Qiandeng lifted the curtain and asked his mother, "Mother, what's the letter?"
When her mother saw her coming back with a gun, she didn't answer her question, but frowned first: "You child, what day is it today and you're still restless? Come here quickly and dress up!"
Qiandeng put down his two guns helplessly and was pulled by his mother to sit in front of the dressing table.
There was still a pink scar on her brow bone where her right eyebrow had been damaged three years earlier.
The maids dipped a crow feather in brow ink and carefully brushed it across her brows. They then used the feather to lift the indigo and darken the broken part, covering the scar. Then, letting her bangs down, she hid all the pain of her past, leaving no trace.
Qian Deng looked at himself in the mirror, still not forgetting the question he had just asked: "Mom, you haven't told me anything about the letter yet."
"That letter..." Mother touched her sleeve pocket, hesitant for a moment, but seeing that there were other people around, she loosened her sleeve again. "Don't worry, I've already replied. Once you've chosen a husband and have time to settle down, I'll tell you in detail."
It sounds like something very important that needs to be discussed at a special time.
Qiandeng blinked and looked at her mother in the mirror, but she had already put the matter aside and asked someone to bring the pomegranate red skirt with gold butterflies embroidered on it that was specially prepared for today.
When I tried this dress on a few days ago, the waist was a little big. After it was altered, my chest seems to be smaller now. It is really too tight.
"Girls grow up differently every day." The mother stroked Qiandeng's shoulders and smiled at her daughter in the mirror.
Fortunately, it was still early, so Yingluo took the clothes to get some. Qiandeng put on her worn-out plain shirt, tied her hair into a bun, and went to have breakfast with her mother.
Prince Changhua had no roots in Chang'an. He rose to power suddenly due to his military achievements and was mostly stationed in the northwest. He had few family members. Therefore, although the palace had a large piece of land, the backyard was very large and the living area in the front yard was very small. When Qiandeng went to the kitchen, he heard the noise in the front hall.
She peeked into the inner courtyard and saw several young servants, dressed in bright clothes and looking like regular servants, coming in from the doorway. One was holding a brocade cushion, another was holding a long sandalwood box, and another was carrying a birdcage covered with red cloth, making a lot of noise.
One of them saw Qiandeng standing at the courtyard gate, dressed simply and without jewelry, so he raised his hand and greeted her, "Hey, sister, my young master doesn't like tea. Do you have any drinks?"
Qiandeng looked beside him, making sure they were calling him. He paused for a moment and said, "Me? Okay, please wait."
She turned and walked towards the tea room next door, drank half a bowl of yogurt in one gulp, picked up a piece of noodle to eat, and then took a pot of clove drink and put it on the tray.
Liuli was about to take over and send it out, but she put the tray away and said with a smile: "They are calling me, I will send it over."
Her mother was both angry and amused, and she held her back: "Why, there's no one at our house, and the county lady has to personally serve them tea and water?"
Qian Deng smiled and said, "Anyway, the clothes haven't been altered yet, and the time hasn't come yet, so it won't hurt to take a break."
Mother frowned: "Nonsense, you know it's not time yet, and you want to go out and meet people in this state."
"Mom, after all, what we see now is their true appearance. When the selection begins later, they will all be pretending. Instead of seeing things in the fog, it's better to get closer and take a closer look, don't you think?"
The mother thought of what she had seen and heard in the market yesterday and sighed for a moment, but when she saw Qian Deng no longer resisting the choice of a son-in-law and even taking the initiative to find out the truth, she felt relieved and waved her hand.
Qiandeng pulled out a silk handkerchief, covered her face with it, and said with a smile, "Don't worry, mother, I'll just take a quick look and won't say a word!"
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