Chapter 4
One of her advantages is her strong ability to be self-consistent, and she can come up with the answer in just a few seconds.
Who cares? She will deal with the enemy with a soldier and not worry about the unknown. This time she will be brave and firm, protect her family, and open up her heart little by little.
This is the benchmark she sets for herself for future actions.
Her thoughts finally became clear, but her steps became even more disordered. She looked at the withered trees in front of her with tears in her eyes, and memories of the past came flooding back.
These trees were planted by her grandmother when she was a child. In the summer, these trees form a huge shade. Many people come here with their bowls to eat, chatting while enjoying the cool breeze. From time to time, a breeze blows by, mixed with the refreshing fragrance of flowers. This place has become a famous gathering place. Children tie hammocks on the trees and fall asleep while playing. The adults set up card tables and chess tables, take a break, and then go back to their own work at four or five o'clock.
At that time, she just thought this kind of life was boring and wanted to grow up all the time. Now she realizes how precious this kind of life is.
Xia Weining walked over, her hand touching the tree, her tears forming a curtain of rain that slowly obscured her vision, until an old man came out of the house, stood not far away and asked her, "Girl, what's wrong with you?"
Hearing the familiar voice, she turned around suddenly, anxiously looking for the source of the sound. When she saw the person standing in front of her, her chest felt like it was hit hard by a huge stone. She cried more and more fiercely, and at one point she was out of breath.
Her behavior frightened the old man, who hurried over to see her and asked, "What's wrong with you?"
Xia Weining just kept crying, and it took her a long time to calm down, breathe a sigh of relief, and hold the old man's hand.
"grandmother."
The emotion in her address was so strong that it startled the old man. Even so, he still asked gently, "Whose family are you from? What difficulties have you encountered?"
"My last name is Xia—" She wanted to say I'm your granddaughter, but she quickly changed her words and said, "Xia Weining. I think you look a lot like my grandmother, so I lost control. I hope I didn't scare you."
"It's okay." The old man stroked her hand. "Is your grandma gone?"
Xia Weining didn't say anything, neither admitting nor denying, so the old man automatically understood that as an admission and comforted her, "Seeing you crying like this, you must have a good relationship with your grandma, right?"
"Hmm." She snorted, tears streaming down her face again. "I'm sorry, grandma."
The old man stared at her for a moment without asking any more questions. This was someone else's sad story, so he should be careful about the situation.
The atmosphere was a little awkward for a moment, and Xia Weining took the initiative to speak: "Grandma, I just arrived here, and meeting you is also a kind of fate. Why don't you treat me as your own granddaughter from now on."
The old man smiled and said, "I got such a big granddaughter for free, it's really a bargain."
"No, I'm the one who's taking advantage because I have a grandma again."
This sentence brought back the old man's sadness. He gently patted Xia Weining's hand and pulled her into the house.
"Please sit down first."
After settling her down, grandma went into the house to find her some peanuts, candies and other snacks.
"Try it quickly, they were all bought during the Chinese New Year."
Xia Weining peeled a candy and put it in his mouth, "It's very sweet."
She laughed and then started crying. She used to love going to her grandma's house to look for food in the jar.
"Are you here to work?"
"Yes, I'm here to be a teacher." This was a profession she came up with on the spur of the moment that quickly convinced people.
"Hello, teacher. You are promising."
Xia Weining smiled. She hadn't made any plans yet, but now that she had said that, she really intended to apply for the teaching position. After all, she had a bachelor's degree and was considered a highly educated talent among the current teaching staff in the county. The most important thing was that as a teacher, she could protect Xia Li at close range.
"Do you have a place to live now?"
"Not yet. I just arrived and haven't made any arrangements yet."
"You definitely don't cook either," said Grandma, with an expression that said, "I know it." "Let's have dinner at our house today."
"Is it appropriate?"
"Why not? It's about adding a pair of chopsticks."
While the two were talking, Xia Li came running back from outside, shouting, "Grandma, I'm hungry."
"I knew you were hungry. If you weren't hungry, you wouldn't know how to go home." He said this, but he didn't stop eating.
Xia Li hugged her waist and acted coquettishly, "Grandma is the best to me."
"You have a conscience."
Xia Weining stood there awkwardly. There was a time when she was so happy, but now she could only envy others, and a feeling of sadness welled up in her heart.
Xia Li looked up and saw Xia Weining, and was very surprised, "Sister, why are you here?"
"Do you know each other?" the old man asked.
Xia Li nodded, "My sister helped me the day before yesterday."
At first, Xia Li didn't understand why she didn't let him go out to play. Later, when he heard about Wei Zhan's situation, he understood. He felt a little scared and was very grateful for her reminder, but he was also a little curious, as if she knew what would happen.
Upon hearing this, the old man's attitude towards Xia Weining became even warmer, "So you are our family's benefactor."
"Your words are too serious. You can't call me a benefactor. I'm just helping you out."
"No matter what, you have helped our girl. You must stay for dinner so that we can express our gratitude."
Xia Weining didn't refuse anymore, "Okay, thank you for your help."
"No trouble, I'll go cook, you guys watch TV for a while, girl, you stay here with me."
Xia Li agreed obediently, "Don't worry, Grandma."
Xia Weining's attention was drawn to her grandmother's figure. She secretly calculated the time and was suddenly shocked.
Grandma still has 3 years to live.
I couldn't help feeling sad again.
Looking back on her grandmother's life, she felt that she had never enjoyed any happiness and had lived a very tiring life, serving the whole family food and drink. It was as if she had never lived for herself. Once, her grandfather was not satisfied with the cooking and threw away the bowl, and she picked it up silently. She had lived a cautious and humble life for half her life. Afterwards, everyone criticized her grandfather, but that time left a deep impression on Xia Weining.
Grandma has never left this area. Once, she even got lost after visiting relatives. She was like a migratory bird in a cage. She also yearned for the outside world, but because she could not break out of the cage, she stayed in her own territory.
She had a heart disease and could not do heavy work, but she could not sit still and often needed to go to the health center for water. Xia Weining still remembers how skinny her grandmother was.
She was reluctant to eat any delicious food and would leave it for the children at home. She never ate much meat. Xia Weining would always buy her some food when he went home every weekend.
The TV volume was very loud, but no one was watching. Xia Weining looked at the door and cried silently, while Xia Li stared at her in a daze.
Xia Li felt that this sister was really strange and didn't understand why she had so many tears.
Xia Weining suddenly sobbed and burst into tears. Her family was poor and looked down upon. She was small in number and was bullied. Previously, her aunt's family came to their house to make trouble and started fighting. Her grandmother fainted from anger.
She was young and ignorant at the time, and said to her grandmother that if possible, she would not be at home, so what was she doing here.
Grandpa later said that grandma cried for a long time behind the kitchen stove that day. This incident has always been like a thorn in Xia Weining's heart.
In the end, my aunt was taken away by her family, leaving behind her young children. The whole family was almost broken up. My grandmother's health became worse, and the conditions were not good at the time, so she couldn't go to a big hospital for treatment.
To make matters worse, she entered a rebellious period. She didn't go to school properly and ignored the situation at home, thinking about dressing up every day. There were also rumors about her at the time, saying that she was fooling around with many boys. Many people pointed fingers at her and she couldn't hold her head up in the village. Her grandmother asked her to be more careful, so she wanted to drop out of school and go out to work. Before leaving, she had a big fight with her grandmother and said in anger that she would never come back.
She experienced a lot and changed a lot outside, but she didn't have time to tell her grandmother.
She did not go home for the Spring Festival. At that time, she was told that her grandmother was in poor health and was receiving treatment. She thought that she would be fine after a few days of intravenous drip like before. However, the day after the Lantern Festival, she suddenly received news that her grandmother had passed away.
Grandma passed away in the middle of the night, living alone in an empty house with no one around her.
Xia Weining cried so hard. This was the first time she had a clear concept of death, but she couldn't accept it.
Whenever she thought of the scene before her grandmother's death, she wished she could kill herself.
The last time she and her grandmother interacted was when they had a quarrel. She hated herself for doing that. She woke up crying countless nights, saying sorry over and over again. She didn't know if her grandmother would forgive her because she would never hear it again.
This is an eternal regret in her heart. From that day on, she seemed to have grown up in an instant and became a completely different person, but the knot in her heart remained forever.
She returned to school and began to study hard. She was no longer vain, no longer made things difficult for her family, and would think of others while neglecting herself. With a series of changes, she became a good student in the eyes of her teachers. From that moment on, she liked to impose a lot of responsibilities on herself.
There were so many unbearable things in the past, and each one was squeezing her breathing space. She felt desperate and suffocated.
This time she wants to make up for her past regrets, treat her grandmother's illness, and take her to fulfill her wish.
The sound of footsteps outside the door interrupted her thoughts. A hunched old man came in. Xia Weining straightened her back instantly and looked at the person who came.
Grandpa pushed the door open and came in. He must have come back from playing cards. He glanced at Xia Weining and asked, "Who is this?"
"A sister who helped me."
Grandpa smiled and took out some candies from his pocket and gave them to Xia Li. "We won them all."
That expression was so smug. Xia Weining's eyes were burning with pain from crying, but tears still flowed out.
Because grandpa treated her the same way before, giving her all the candies he won. That was the time when he felt the most proud.
Grandpa finally took out a candy and handed it to Xia Weining, "This is the last one, you eat it."
Xia Weining's lips moved slightly. She had a lot of things she wanted to say but couldn't. She just got up and ran away with the candy.
Grandma chased out from the kitchen, "You don't want to eat?"
"I have something else to do, maybe next time."
She fled without looking back, and only dared to take a breath after running a long way away.
She originally thought that if she went back to the past she could change the status quo according to her own ideas, but when she really came back she found that she didn't have to do anything. Just seeing familiar people and things occupied all her energy.
Even if she is a bystander, not an experiencer.
After leaning against the wall to recover for a while, she got up and went to work.
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