Chapter 16: Life for Life, Love for One
The sky was clear and cloudless today, and the sunlight brought a rare warmth to people's bodies, but Ji Suxian felt extremely cold.
"Brother Xiao, Brother Xiao."
The two people in the room were silent for a long time. Seeing that Xiao Qingxu didn't seem to want to explain, Ji Suxian's voice began to tremble, like the water drops that were about to fall on the tender buds in the soil outside.
You will die.
You will die!
"Everything has its own cycle. You exchanged your life for another's, defying the will of heaven. You..."
She stretched out her hand tremblingly, wanting to grab his shoulder to ask for clarification. Just when her fingertips were about to touch, Xiao Qingxu finally spoke.
"Little sister."
He tilted his head slightly. Ji Suxian couldn't see what he looked like behind the mask, but she could hear the determination in his voice.
"In this life, I only love her."
Xiao Qingxu's voice suddenly softened, as calm as his heart at the moment, and even the mask on his face no longer seemed strange. He had never expected that after saying such a shameful thing, he would find an unprecedented peace.
But in Ji Suxian's view, such tender and gentle words were a resounding declaration of the fact that he would have a short life.
"Ah?" Ji Suxian was really angry and sad.
She had been obsessed with medicine since she was a child, and didn't understand the relationship between men and women, nor did she bother to understand those love, hate, and vengeance, which was very troublesome. Although Brother Xiao was born in Kyoto and was the eldest prince of Kyoto, he spent most of his time in Baijialou, and he had his own stand-in in Kyoto to cover for him.
His life is about to be lost, what on earth is Brother Xiao still liking?
Shang Yuwan was deeply poisoned. Although she had taken the antidote, it would take some time for her to wake up. Xiao Qingxu reached out and stroked the white hair on her temples. Behind the mask was his undisguised heartache.
"She and I are both children without mothers."
Ji Suxian frowned, thinking that this man was crazy, "No one in Baijialou has parents."
There was war several decades ago. Although the war stopped more than ten years ago, the people of the world still cannot live in peace.
The rise and fall of the country brings suffering to the people. More than a decade ago, natural disasters continued, leaving refugees everywhere and starving people everywhere. The former director of Baijialou, Xiao, was originally a wandering knight. With great compassion, he saw the orphans and their families, so he dedicated all his efforts to establishing Baijialou to adopt wandering orphans from all over the country, so that these orphans could finally have a home.
Ren Xiao is Xiao Qingxu's master and has some friendship with Xiao Qingxu's mother, Queen Xu Zhiyao. Xu Zhiyao was the former queen. After her death, Ren Xiao secretly accepted Xiao Qingxu as his disciple, so that this child who lost his mother at birth could have a place to get some warmth that the palace could not give him.
"In Kyoto, she and I are the only ones without mothers."
Xiao Qingxu lowered his head slightly.
"She's not as lucky as I am to have you by her side. When the Shang family's master was young, he had a very good relationship with the current emperor. The Shang family is extremely honored and favored, and the glory is endless. Who knows how many people are secretly waiting for the Shang family's downfall to rush in and tear off this piece of fat meat."
"The eldest lady committed suicide in the mansion. As the legitimate daughter of the Shang family, she was not even allowed a moment to mourn. The second master of the Shang family was no longer able to march because his eldest brother had already become a general. He was forced to turn to literature, but he was not allowed to excel and was always outshined. She was alone every night. Although Twelve was by her side, he was stubborn. She had to support everything for the Shang family by herself."
As he spoke, Xiao Qingxu smiled, but it was a bitter smile.
"She wanted to learn the Eight Graces of Women and, secretly, the Six Arts of a Gentleman. She was willing to learn everything just to keep the Shang family, a tree that attracts the wind, firmly established. She often couldn't sleep at night because of all the work going on with the Shang family, and she developed headaches from it. Can you imagine that someone so busy that she barely even had time to rest, could still see a place for me in her eyes?"
"......" Ji Suxian was angry and guilty but didn't understand a thing.
She was angry that Brother Xiao disregarded his own life for love.
But at the same time, she felt guilty towards Brother Xiao. The children in Baijialou were all orphans without parents. Although Xiao Qingxu was different from them, the palace was more terrifying than wandering among the common people. They didn't want to bother him with too much, so they never asked him how he was doing in Kyoto.
Life in Baijialou is always better than in Kyoto. If Brother Xiao spends more time with everyone in the building, he won't feel so miserable.
Although this idea is good, everyone overlooks one problem: a life that is too divided will make him more timid on the other side.
Ji Suxian didn't understand what Xiao Qingxu meant by "a place".
But she didn't really want to listen to him ramble on, so she asked directly: "Brother Xiao, does she have feelings for you?"
Xiao Qingxu was silent for a while, then nodded gently, "Yes, but not much."
Ji Suxian: “…?”
No, what kind of brain is this? It's incomprehensible!
"Squeak--" the door was pushed open. Ji Suxian looked in the direction of the sound and saw that it was Lu Heying.
The disbelief in her eyes had not yet faded, but when she saw Lu Heying didn't react when she saw Xiao Qingxu holding Shang Yuwan's hand, she instantly understood.
"Brother, did you know this all along?"
Lu Heying came in with medicine, dressed in a dark blue suit, and said neatly, "Junior sister, now that things have come to this, there is no need to say more."
It's not that he has no opinion on what Xiao Qingxu did this time, but by the time he discovered it, Xiao Qingxu's body had already deteriorated.
He handed the medicine to Xiao Qingxu and said, "Drink it. Twelve should be here soon after changing the medicine. There is also new news coming from outside waiting for you to check it out."
Ji Suxian watched Xiao Qingxu take off his mask and gulp down the medicinal soup in one gulp, and asked, "What about Master? Does Master know?"
Xiao Qingxu put the mask back on. Lu Heying looked at him for a few seconds, sighed, and nodded.
Yao Lao knew about it, and could even be said to support Xiao Qingxu's choice.
"Why don't you tell me? I'm not an outsider, why can't you tell me?"
Now that things have come to this, no matter how much she objects, it is useless. Ji Suxian feels furious.
"Even though this has happened, it's still too unbelievable. The fewer people who know about it, the better."
"...That's true." Ji Suxian also fell silent.
A question suddenly occurred to her: "What about the original owner of this body?"
"Dead." Xiao Qingxu covered Shang Yuwan's hand with the quilt and tucked it in. "There can't be two tigers in one mountain, and there can't be two souls in one body. Don't worry, she willingly gave her body."
Ji Suxian's brows never relaxed. "Who helped you?"
"Defying fate and resurrecting from the dead. You would never be capable of such evil magic. Who is helping you, and what does he want?"
Xiao Qingxu lifted the quilt up and touched Shang Yuwan's hair.
"I don't know."
Ji Suxian and Lu Heying blurted out at the same time: "You don't know?!"
Ji Suxian and Lu Heying looked at each other, and as their eyes met, they fought for several rounds.
The look in the junior sister's eyes seemed to want to kill someone. Lu Heying was defeated and turned his head to cough to hide his guilt.
He is not a know-it-all. Xiao Qingxu kept silent and his master didn't say anything either, so it is naturally impossible for him to know everything.
Ji Suxian's mind was almost spinning. "Brother Xiao, are you sure she is really the Shang Yuwan you love now, right?"
Xiao Qingxu stood up, looked at Ji Suxian and nodded firmly.
His suddenly shortened life span was the best proof of this.
"What about her?"
Ji Suxian looked at Shang Yuwan, whose eyes were closed, with mixed feelings.
"She doesn't know what you did, nor does she know why she came back to life. I'm afraid she thinks she's a demon who stole someone else's body and resurrected."
Ji Suxian didn't have much contact with Shang Yuwan after her rebirth, but she could tell that she was a smart and strong woman, very much to her liking, otherwise she wouldn't have said so much about the waterwheel as an example.
She didn't understand love, but she knew that Brother Xiao would never fall in love with any evil woman. To make Brother Xiao treat her with his life like this, she must be as kind as Brother Xiao, and have some extraordinary qualities that she had never seen before.
Such a person will never accept with peace of mind that he or she has taken over another person's body and let that person die for her.
"Have you ever thought about how you would let her cope if she found out what you did for her? Would she commit suicide after her revenge, or would she hate you for sacrificing your own life and let her live in regret and pain for the rest of her life?"
"Are you crazy? Do you want her to live with hatred and guilt for the rest of her life, or do you want her to remember you forever?"
"...I want her to live and live well."
"Of course, what you said makes sense." Xiao Qingxu avoided Ji Suxian's gaze. "It would be bad for her to know about this, so let her not know. She doesn't need to know. She is not wrong."
Ji Suxian: "..."
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