Chapter 39: Old Dream (Part 2) Lian Qiang was silent. It was not difficult to imagine that every time...
"...Let's go to bed early." Chi Xingji changed the subject abruptly, and Lian Qiang no longer wanted to press him. The two of them lay quietly on the bed, fully clothed.
Lian Qiang listened to the silence outside the house, which gradually turned into the sound of birds and people singing, and she endured another boring night.
This was also an extremely ordinary night in their lives.
Then, the scene changed, and it was evening again in an instant.
"I told you, I don't want to try again!"
Lian Qiang's consciousness was shaken. She was very familiar with this hoarse voice.
She and Chi Xingji didn't argue easily, and on the few occasions they did, Chi Xingji usually tolerated her, or she made a small concession. Those dark days were when they argued most frequently.
As far as they knew, no one who had fallen into the devil could come back. Chi Xingji patiently took her to try one method after another, still undaunted. But to Yu Lianqiang, those methods were tantamount to slow slicing.
To draw out the demonic energy, one had to induce it again and again. The two energies within her body battled against each other, and Lian Qiang was already exhausted, unable to withstand the repeated trials.
After Chi Xingji proposed to try again, she completely exploded.
Lian Qiang didn't understand. Chi Xingji couldn't see her every moment of pain, yet he tirelessly kept her working in vain. Was he completely incapable of empathy? Or was it that her ability to exorcise the demonic energy was far more important than her own safety and feelings?
Her nails dug into her palms inch by inch. Lian Qiang didn't want to think about it. In Chi Xingji's eyes, who was more important, her or his "innocent" wife?
Faced with her sudden attack, Chi Xingji didn't refute her. He just stood there silently with his hands hanging down, confusion in his eyes. After a long while, he said sullenly, "...I'm sorry. If you don't want to, I won't force you to do this again."
These words touched Lian Qiang. She rarely saw Chi Xingji being so humble. She should have been proud of his compromise, but she felt empty in her heart and had nothing to say.
"...In the future, you should do less things that delay your work." Lian Qiang stood up and was about to leave.
"What is the business? What are these things?" Chi Xingji's voice came from behind her. She paused and did not look back.
The scenes continued to shift, another ordinary day. These fragments weren't hopeless, but they were all real and difficult days and nights. Lian Qiang didn't want to dwell on the dream anymore, and told herself: Wake up, wake up, wake up quickly!
Fortunately, the dream was still fresh. Lian Qiang opened her eyes and saw the small house in front of her. Chu Shan was bending over and looking down at her.
She couldn't tell if the nameless emotion in his eyes was concern or not. Lian Qiang raised her hand swiftly, clasping her fingers around his neck, and practically gnashed her teeth as she asked, "Did you do this?"
Without thinking too much, Lian Qiang knew why she was feeling strange.
"...I saw it. Are you here just for him?" Even though his lifeblood was strangled, Chu Shan still looked down at her from top to bottom, without any embarrassment of being controlled by others.
He actually snooped into her dreams? How did he do it without disturbing her?
Lian Qiang was filled with doubts. Furthermore, as soon as Chu Shan spoke, she noticed something subtle: his voice seemed to have changed. It still had the crispness of a young man, but with a slightly more refined quality. A closer look revealed that Chu Shan's facial features had softened considerably, as if... he had become a woman.
This thought came suddenly, and Lian Qiang was surprised. She loosened her knuckles and said, "Why can you see my dreams? Who are you? What do you want to do?"
"Why are you still asking such a question? I've already told you," Chu Shan's eyebrows curved, and he even smiled faintly, "I am Chu Shan."
At this moment, Lian Qiang still couldn't detect any sinisterness in his tone or expression. His attitude was nonchalant, and he didn't think he had done anything remarkable, nor did he feel that Lian Qiang could threaten him.
——Like an ant trying to shake a tree, her actions in front of him were futile and insignificant.
Lian Qiang's hands dropped as if exhausted. She closed her eyes with great effort. She was too lazy to investigate his purpose in spying on her or even causing her dreams. Even if he did something, it wouldn't harm her life, but...
She suddenly opened her eyes and said coldly, "I'm very grateful that you took me in for one night, but I don't care who you are - don't peek into my memories again."
Chu Shan remained silent. Lian Qiang rose and left the house. It was already bright and sunny. She ignored Chu Shan's expression and, without a word, stepped out into the snow.
Logically speaking, without the wind and snow blocking the way, everything should have gone smoothly. However, when Lian Qiang spent a day and a night climbing to the top of the mountain, there was nothing there except thick snow and cold air.
——The rumored Dream Silkworm Clan does not exist at all.
She thought she had searched too roughly and missed something, but after searching back and forth several times, she found that there was no other living thing on the mountain except herself.
"How could this be? This is impossible..." Lian Qiang murmured, thinking about the suspicious points along the way. In the end, she found that the most suspicious person on the mountain was Chu Shan.
He appeared halfway up the mountain, invited her to spend the night, and could control other people's dreams at will...
Once the idea formed, it was constantly reinforced. Lian Qiang didn't hesitate and went straight down the mountain along the same route.
Halfway through the journey, the snow suddenly began to fall heavily. When Lian Qiang arrived at the location of the small house she remembered, she saw Chu Shan standing straight in the direction she came from from afar, as if... he was waiting for her.
Lian Qiang stumbled and nearly fell into the icy snow. She stood up in the icy snow, her eyes meeting his. She smiled, as if mocking her own embarrassment. "Who are you?"
It had only been a day since they'd been apart, but the relationship between them had been completely reversed from when they first met. Now, it was Lian Qiang who was the passive one.
She noticed that the subtle changes she had originally thought Chu Shan had undergone were not an illusion. His slim features were replaced by smoother ones, and his Adam's apple disappeared. If he only had a bit of a girlish air before, now Lian Qiang could be sure that he had indeed changed.
"Who am I? Don't you have the answer in your heart?" Chu Shan asked back, and the voice that came out was a woman's. "Haven't you been looking for me?"
After exhaling a few puffs of white air, Lian Qiang's breathing calmed down: "What do you want to do? Why... did you become like this?"
"You mean, my female form?" Chu Shan raised his hand, very calmly. "This is my original form. The one before that was also my original form."
He once again uttered the strange words in a calm tone: "They are all me."
He, or rather, she, did not want to answer Lian Qiang's first question. Lian Qiang calmed herself down and asked again, "Just tell me, I want Mei Meng Si. What do you need me to do?"
"...Don't be so impatient," Chu Shan said with a hint of dissatisfaction. "Everyone wants a perfect dream, but few come forward to seek it. I have swallowed the love and hate of too many people, but few are willing to talk to me."
As he spoke, he revealed a hint of dissatisfaction: "You are a rare visitor, and a demon at that. I just want to talk to you more, is that not okay?"
Lian Qiang was silent for a moment, then smiled again and said, "Leaving visitors freezing outside the door won't make them interested in conversation."
Chu Shan thought for a moment, and seemed to think that what she said made sense, so he bowed and let her in.
The two of them sat down, and the bargaining chips seemed to be more balanced. Lian Qiang still didn't dare to relax. She was not afraid of Chu Shan's demands, but she was worried that she would not be able to meet them.
"I've read your memories. Is he the knot in your heart?" Chu Shan said nothing more and went straight to the point, asking the question that had not been answered before again.
Now that the truth had been revealed, Lian Qiang admitted it openly: "Yes, I came here just for him."
"No wonder. I took a brief taste of your memory," Chu Shan said slowly, "and it was bitter."
Lian Qiang couldn't help but smile: "Do dream silkworms also eat nightmares?"
Chu Shan said as a matter of course: "Of course I will eat nightmares. Perfection is hard to come by in this world, and beautiful dreams are rare too. If I only feed on beautiful dreams, I will starve to death. Besides, eating beautiful dreams will make me even more miserable."
"Why?"
"To gain in this world, one must first give. The price of weaving a sufficiently realistic illusion is one that not many people can afford." As she spoke of this, her eyes grew dim. "I need to capture your emotions, so subtle they are almost non-existent, with great precision."
Lian Qiang frowned in confusion: "What...does it mean?"
"For example, the emotions you can experience may only be felt through a short piece of silk like this," Chu Shan pointed with two fingers, "but for me, the same emotion can be felt through the entire cocoon."
"In other words," Lian Qiang held her breath, "if we're in pain, you'll feel it a hundred or a thousand times more, and the same goes for happiness?"
"That's right. To you it's joy, but to me it's bliss. Everyone thinks it's just a simple task to weave a dream. No one knows how painful it is for me to fall into the reality after tasting the sweet dream."
Chu Shan's expression was calm, and it was obvious that he was used to it. However, this kind of familiarity made people even more sad.
Lian Qiang was silent. It was not difficult to imagine that she had deeply experienced the feeling of being pardoned every time she woke up from a nightmare, or the feeling of loss when she woke up from a sweet dream.
The fear of wanting something but having to is unbearable. The moon is always hanging in the sky, and gradually the desire to pick it is lost. The short time you have it will make you miss it more.
"...You can totally refuse them. You have the right to do so." Lian Qiang made a suggestion that was not in her own interest.
Chu Shan shook his head and said, "Everyone has his own destiny. This is my innate duty. Just like a scabbard was created to hold a sword, if there is no lock, there will naturally be no key. Our tribe was born to eat dreams.
"Besides, without the nourishment of my emotions, I would die."
"Tribe?" Lian Qiang repeated the word, "But, you are the only one on this mountain."
Chu Shan's tone was emotionless: "They all died for one reason or another. Only I, as if I was born to be chosen, survived.
"I used to doubt myself, but now I understand that I was born to accept all of this. Because I have experienced all kinds of emotions, I can be anyone, and I am anyone."
Lian Qiang was silent for a moment, then asked, "Why are you telling me all this? If I tell you, I... can't help you at all."
She even came here to "persecute" her in disguise.
"...I don't know either." This time Chu Shan answered very late, with a hint of confusion in her words that she herself could hardly detect. "But I always feel that you are different. Maybe it's because you would say such things."
Lian Qiang smiled weakly. Chu Shan looked at her and suddenly raised the corner of his lips: "Give me your hand."
Although she didn't understand the meaning, Lian Qiang still did it.
The palm holding her was cold. Lian Qiang subconsciously wanted to break free, but Chu Shan held her tightly: "Whatever you want, I am willing to help you."
"I don't..." Before she could finish her answer, she fell into a deep sleep.
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The author has something to say: Being able to empathize with others is sometimes a very valuable asset~
Summary: It's so easy to go crazy, it's driving my obsessive-compulsive disorder crazy... Thank you to the little angels who voted for me or irrigated nutrient solution between 2023-05-07 00:31:58 and 2023-05-08 20:08:14~
Thanks to the little angel who irrigated the nutrient solution: 4 bottles of Girls' Generation;
Thank you very much for your support. I will continue to work hard!
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