Chapter 88 The Cold Mist Disperses In those youthful days, the Xie family suffered a sudden change…
At that young age, the Xie family suffered a sudden misfortune, and Xie Qinghe faced a brush with death. Having seen through the coldness and warmth of the world, the only person willing to lend a helping hand was Jiang Xu, who was still the Crown Prince at the time.
Every year thereafter, Jiang Xu, with lofty ambitions, was helped by him at the cost of his life.
Others advised him to prepare a way out for himself, but Xie Qinghe just smiled and laughed it off.
From childhood to adulthood, he had little kinship with his father, and there was much suspicion and exploitation between the emperor and his subjects. Naturally, he did not expect the emperor, with whom he had grown up, to have much genuine affection for him.
However, it was Jiang Xu who saved his life.
Whenever he plans his journey home, he thinks of the day when Jiang Xu will rule the world and there will be no room for anyone else beside him.
He himself was a manipulator of power; he could imagine it and understand it.
Moreover, he had been exhausted from year after year.
Since he only had a few years left to live, if Jiang Xu wanted it, he could offer it up without hesitation.
Until he met Ning Lu.
On a stormy night, he tried to kill her several times, yet she still did her best to save him from danger, cared about his basic needs, worked hard to provide for him, and earnestly advised him to take care of his health.
She was very noisy, repeatedly emphasizing that she was the one who saved his life.
She said, "Life is only 30,000 days long, so every extra day is a day more."
Later, Ning Lu, who was most afraid of death, returned to save him at the cost of her own life, and the most upright woman stood by his side in the face of right and wrong.
Xie Qinghe prided himself on his steadfastness, yet he also felt that his long-held beliefs were crumbling overnight.
Therefore, he was unable to answer Jiang Xu's question.
Not hearing Xie Qinghe's reply, Jiang Xu smiled bitterly, his thoughts drifting away.
"I still remember the day the Xie family was imprisoned after their affair. You were in the Eastern Palace. The Imperial Guards came to arrest you. You were young then, and the Eastern Palace was in chaos. You remained calm and even told me to take care."
"You said that once you left, few people around me would dare to speak the truth. Doing things in the palace is like walking on thin ice, with scheming everywhere you look. The pain of today will serve as a warning for tomorrow."
“The thing a teenager fears most is having no friends on the road ahead. I rushed to my father’s palace to plead for him. My father reminded me that with just a few words, you have buried loneliness and fear in my heart, making me think that I cannot live without you.”
"Of course I know that you, Xie Jiming, are not someone I can control, but I am still willing to trust you. In my heart, I still cherish the affection for the Crown Prince."
Standing in the courtyard for a long time, the chill seeped into his bones. Xie Qinghe silently pulled his cloak tighter, his jade-like fingers gripping the stone table with difficulty. He lowered his eyes, panting, and forced himself to stay awake.
"Your Majesty's kindness is deeply appreciated and will be remembered."
Jiang Xu was amused by his stubbornness, shook his head and paced back and forth, then turned around and stared intently at Xie Qinghe.
Is it possible that Xie Qinghe only turned his back on people today?
No, not exactly.
He's always been like this since he was a child—cold-faced and unyielding, unmoved by either soft or hard approaches.
Although he was his study companion, he never said a word of flattery, and it was precisely for this reason that he trusted him.
But Jiang Xu didn't believe him, or rather, he was afraid that he was lying.
"Xie Jiming, you know that everyone in this world says they remember my kindness. I don't need you."
His tone was desolate, his gaze blank, and in a moment of distraction, he felt as if he were a sulking child, devoid of any monarchical dignity.
Jiang Xu had no choice but to turn his back and quickly twirl the beads in his hand in an attempt to calm his emotions.
Out of the corner of his eye, Xie Qinghe noticed the swaying of the pearl tassels and his cold, hard expression softened slightly. He stopped half a step behind him.
"Your Majesty, now that the situation is settled and the rebels have been eliminated, keeping me by your side would be a disgrace to Your Majesty's reputation."
"If I want to keep you, who dares to object?"
"Over the years, I have borne the blame alone, all so that Your Majesty may be a virtuous and wise ruler with a clean conscience, and bring a bright and prosperous world back to the people."
"Regardless of how much controversy I might attract, I am currently suffering from a chronic illness that is difficult to cure. Even if I were to assume the position of Grand Secretary, it would only last for a few years."
Sensing the youthful spirit in Jiang Xu's fluctuating tone, Xie Qinghe patiently revealed the truth.
Exhausted and unable to stand, her straight shoulders swayed slightly forward as she spoke, and her breathing became heavier.
His voice was hoarse, tinged with a hint of sarcasm: "Innovation should be pursued in one fell swoop. You've already planned this, why bother?"
Jiang Xu was shocked and suddenly looked up into Xie Qinghe's eyes.
Those eyes were calm and confident, as if they had long seen through his unspoken schemes.
Yes, we've been classmates and close friends for many years, who doesn't know who the other is?
Just as he had long seen through Xie Qinghe's indifference and gloom, Xie Qinghe had also long understood his selfishness and cowardice.
Even if Xie Qinghe himself did not step down, the first thing he would do after gaining a foothold would be to reform and sever ties with the oppressive policies of the late emperor.
Similarly, Xie Qinghe, who was closely associated with that bloody battle for the throne, could not be spared either.
Even so, being exposed by Xie Qinghe to his face felt like having the last veil of shame lifted.
Loneliness and melancholy suddenly welled up in my heart, and when I opened my mouth again, I felt that the things between the two of us were difficult to express.
Seeing the cold glint in Xie Qinghe's eyes, Jiang Xu was terrified, then sneered, "Even if I don't let you go, you still have a way to leave, right?"
There was no response, yet it was more effective than a response.
Jiang Xu pointed at Xie Qinghe, tapping the air repeatedly before finally giving up, then turned away in a huff.
He forced himself to walk through the moon gate with composure, panting heavily, feeling as if all his strength had been drained away, and he couldn't help but stop.
Wu Quan, who was waiting outside the door, immediately stepped forward and saw that he looked angry and looked behind him.
Regardless of how the negotiations went, Wu Quan was already aware of the rift between the two men, and asked in a low voice, "Your Majesty, is it because Lord Xie is so unruly...?"
The man remained silent upon hearing this, his face revealing a chilling dissatisfaction beneath his angry expression.
Wu Quan's heart tightened, realizing he had misspoke, and he immediately knelt down.
"After returning to the palace, go and receive your punishment yourself."
"Yes, Your Majesty, I was too talkative, I am guilty."
Jiang Xu turned to the side with his hands behind his back, his gaze returning to the courtyard.
Amidst the spring branches, shadows slipped into the pavilion.
Xie Qinghe, who was always arrogant and domineering in front of him, softened his posture almost the moment he saw the short figure, and let the other person help him to sit down on the stone bench.
Her paper-thin figure rose and fell, steadily supported by the newcomer. Even as she naturally took the life-saving pill from his chest and put it in her mouth, he simply swallowed it calmly.
Jiang Xu stood at a distance, gradually slowing down the speed at which he twisted the beads.
The sharp gaze seemed to want to cut off every branch in its line of sight so that it could see the scene in the courtyard more clearly.
This unresisting and defenseless Xie Qinghe was someone he had never seen before.
Upon careful consideration, it belatedly dawned on me that Xie Qinghe, who used to ride horses and hunt and talk by the fireside in his youth, might truly be frail and unable to continue.
A long-lost bitter taste rose on the tip of his tongue, and Jiang Xu couldn't tell whether it was regret or guilt.
The footsteps behind me faded into the distance.
Ning Lu breathed a sigh of relief, hugged Xie Qinghe's shoulders tightly, and leaned on him for support.
"Why didn't you go to Doctor Luo's?"
"Since you're here, of course I have to stay here and guard you."
As Ning Lu spoke, she reached down and scooped up his clenched fist, gently separating each knuckle to reveal the row of crescent moons on his palm.
Even so, you have to hold on. I'm starting to think you're really okay.
"My fever just broke a few days ago, and there's still a cold snap coming. What if I catch a chill again?"
Suddenly looking up, she saw Xie Qinghe's eyes crinkle with a smile amidst her rambling: "Why are you looking at me like that? Are you captivated by me?"
Xie Qinghe's smile deepened, and he hooked his fingers around her nose.
Having grown accustomed to his alluring appearance, Ning Lu had developed the ability to remain unfazed by his beauty and continued, "He saved your life, and you did things for him, risking half your life and reputation. You don't owe him anything."
Hearing her erase the past with just a few words, Xie Qinghe couldn't help but smile. He took her fingertips into his palm with his cool hand, lowered his eyes, and shook his head.
"If you're so good at calculating, how could you come up with such a terrible idea that would get you into trouble?"
A bad idea?
Ning Lu frowned, took half a step back, and looked at him with a pout.
This guy always speaks in a sarcastic and roundabout way.
The wording used today was a bit too direct.
Recalling the anger in his eyes just now, Ning Lu couldn't help but feel a little guilty, and chuckled twice, saying, "That was just a moment of panic!"
"In a moment of desperation."
He repeated Ning Lu's words in a low, husky voice, devoid of emotion, the smile in his eyes fading: "If he agrees, are you really going to kill someone for him?"
"How could that be? You're here!"
Ning Lu raised her voice.
"What if I hadn't come?"
She tried to dodge, but Xie Qinghe's eyes were fixed on her. Knowing she couldn't escape, she cleared her throat and said ingratiatingly, "I didn't kill for him. I did it for you, and for myself."
"Anyway, when I met you, you were already living off a woman. Now I'm being merciful and letting you continue to do so. There's nothing wrong with that."
A dull pain shot through her fingertips, and Ning Lu instinctively tried to pull her hand away. But upon closer inspection, she saw that Xie Qinghe's hand was bulging with veins and trembling slightly from the exertion.
She pursed her lips, twitched her nose, and obediently accepted Xie Qinghe's mild punishment.
"And isn't this just a way to fool them?"
She smiled and agreed, still trying to gloss over the matter with a perfunctory response.
Xie Qinghe, unusually serious, frowned and stared intently, then said in a low voice, "You don't know what that means. You can't just say things like that."
Upon hearing this, Ning Lu seemed to have been touched on a sore spot. Her gentle expression vanished, and she abruptly took half a step back, solemnly defending herself: "I know!"
"Xie Qinghe, I admit it's a bad idea, but that doesn't mean I haven't thought it through."
To demonstrate to him how thoughtful she was, she stretched out her fingers and began to explain.
“First of all, he is the emperor, and I would not lie to him, otherwise it would be the crime of deceiving the emperor. So I understand the weight of this proposal.”
"Secondly, I've seen blood before in order to protect myself, and I know how terrible killing is. I also know it's difficult to do, but as I've said before, practice makes perfect..."
"Self-preservation and killing are different."
Xie Qinghe frowned and corrected her statement.
"What's the difference? Isn't protecting you self-defense?"
Ning Lu.
Xie Qinghe frowned and interrupted Ning Lu's rebuttal, but at the same moment he met the shimmering tears in her eyes.
"You don't believe I can protect you."
Stubborn, aggrieved, and unconvinced...
A sharp pain shot through Xie Qinghe's heart. He suddenly realized that he had been too forceful, said the wrong thing, or done the wrong thing, and quickly loosened his grip on her fingers.
That's not what I meant.
"So what do you mean?"
Seeing that he had let go, Ning Lu became even more displeased and pressed him further, "You just think that I made this decision without thinking about the consequences, and that I was reckless, acting impulsively, and saying these things out of spite. Is that right?"
"Silence means I'm right!"
She turned away angrily, staring at the swaying flowers outside the pavilion, blinking rapidly, trying to swallow her tears.
"If you think I'm stupid, that's arrogance. If you think I said those things out of recklessness, that's distrust of my feelings for you."
She spoke eloquently, and the two accusations made Xie Qinghe speechless.
In just a moment of stunned silence, she had placed him in a dilemma.
Who is it that is clumsy with words and not good at speaking?
His heart softened at her tearful appearance, and he leaned down to grab her sleeve again, gently shaking it.
Ning Lu pulled her hand away and moved away, pretending to avoid seeing him. Her angry back view clearly showed her grievance.
The pavilion was quiet, with only the rustling of the spring breeze on the branches.
Suddenly, the eaves bells jingled. Xie Qinghe propped himself up on the table, pulled her into his arms, and, taking advantage of her reluctance to push him away, almost playfully leaned his head to whisper in her ear.
"So, Ning Lulu understood all the consequences and knew that the road ahead was full of difficulties, yet she was still willing to exchange herself with the Emperor for me."
Ning Lu snorted coldly, lowered her head and tried to pry his hands clasped in front of her, but instead caught sight of the dark red needle mark on his wrist.
Those were marks left by frequent acupuncture, and they were truly shocking.
She felt sorry for him and was soft-hearted, but she didn't want to let him go.
She bit her lip and, in a fit of pique, forcefully pulled down the man's sleeve to cover the mottled scars.
Out of sight, out of mind.
Turning her head to stare at the flowers among the rocks outside the pavilion, she blinked rapidly, trying her best to suppress the heat in her eyes, but still couldn't hide the sob in her voice.
"Don't think I don't know what you're plotting. Just because I don't say anything doesn't mean I'm stupid. The reason I didn't expose you in front of the emperor just now was because I didn't want him to get cocky."
Her voice was muffled, like wads of cotton stuffed into Xie Qinghe's chest.
"Although I am half forced to stay in this world, my choice to stay by your side is entirely voluntary."
“I have seen Ji Amin’s tenderness, and I have also seen Xie Qinghe’s hard work. So, I have decided to love you with all my might.”
"This means that I don't care about those ambiguous opinions from the outside world, nor do I care about your past that you are unwilling to talk about. You don't need to test my acceptance of you by telling me how bad or vicious you are, but you shouldn't underestimate my ability to think independently either."
"Xie Qinghe, you need to know that I've thought through all the costs and consequences, and even though I know the road ahead will be difficult, I still want to fight for it. I'm willing to do everything in my power to exchange for your future ease and happiness with Jiang Xu."
Xie Qinghe's breathing was rapid beside my ear, his hot breath penetrating my skin.
The cool tip of his nose brushed against Ning Lu's earlobe and then landed on her neck.
A faint, damp sensation seeped into her collar, sending shivers down the girl's spine.
"It's alright, Xie Qinghe, I'll take care of things from now on."
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