Seeing the doubt in the girl's expression, Xi Qingxu asked, "So, what kind of reaction do you want me to have?"
He thought of the male protagonist in the anime and blurted out, "You think I should get an erection like the male protagonist in that anime, right?"
The boy spoke calmly, his facial expression was indifferent, and his voice was naturally low and slightly hoarse. He spoke at a moderate pace, as if he were talking about a trivial matter that had nothing to do with him.
Even Lu Chuqing, whose soul was far older than his, choked on her words, coughing twice to cover her embarrassment, "Uh, that's not what I meant..."
She scratched her head awkwardly and said, "I kind of agree with what you said."
Xi Qingxu looked at her and heard her say, "You said you like me, so what you were looking at just now, did you ever think about having it happen with me?"
He fell silent.
Lu Chuqing knew that her approach was a bit extreme. She could have simply helped him clarify things and explained them clearly, instead of using a method that was highly likely to lead him astray.
However, she also thought that given Xi Qingxu's personality, it might take a long time to figure things out, so she used this simple and direct method and asked him directly if he had any fantasies about her.
Although this approach might confuse liking with physical desire, she felt that the two were connected.
Although she didn't have a good impression of that kind of thing.
Seeing Xi Qingxu with his head slightly lowered and silent, she assumed he had indeed had such thoughts and was about to say something when she heard him say, "No."
Xi Qingxu thought back on all their interactions from the time he first met Lu Chuqing until now. He realized that he had never crossed any lines, but he hadn't hidden his feelings for her.
"I've never had any inappropriate thoughts about you. I just want you by my side, to eat with you, go to school with you, and share funny things that happen in class. I don't want you to be too far away from me, and I don't want you to stop talking to me..."
The boy spoke softly, and Lu Chuqing had already recovered from the shock of hearing the answer, silently listening to the person beside her express his inner feelings.
After Xi Qingxu had finished speaking for a long time, she tugged at his sleeve, met his dark eyes, and said, "Xi Qingxu, what you're saying isn't about liking someone."
Xi Qingxu stared back at her intently, then asked in a low voice, "What is that?"
Lu Chuqing organized her thoughts and then began, “Actually, I’ve heard some things about you from my uncle. He said you suffered a lot. You were often beaten when you were very young, and you never had enough to eat. You were always cold in the dead of winter and had to squat in the snow to wash dishes with cold water for others. After he took you in, you didn’t speak for a long time and didn’t go out to play like other children.”
"Even as an adult, you'll still be quiet and have no friends. What you just said seems to me like you just want a good friend with whom you can share everything and have someone to accompany you in everything you do."
“You said you didn’t have any inappropriate thoughts about me. I think you probably just feel lonely and want a good friend. Because you’re emotionally deprived, you haven’t been able to figure out exactly what that longing is.”
After hearing this, Xi Qingxu remained silent for a long time, pondering whether her feelings were as Lu Chuqing had described.
But as the girl said, he was emotionally deficient and couldn't figure out what it was even after thinking about it for a long time.
But thinking about it carefully, it is indeed just as Lu Chuqing said.
He had no inappropriate thoughts about her. When he saw her with someone else, he only wondered if she would forget him and leave him. If it was love, his lack of possessiveness towards her meant he didn't want her to be with someone else, but he never thought that way.
Perhaps he had been alone for too long and wanted someone to keep him company. He couldn't quite figure out whether it was a longing for a good friend or a crush on someone.
Xi Qingxu had probably figured it out. When he looked up at Lu Chuqing again, he said, "You know I have emotional deficiencies and am easily confused about feelings, so could you help me and teach me what it means to like someone?"
Lu Chuqing was taken aback by his thoughts and was quite stunned when she heard them.
But she quickly realized what she was doing and refused, saying, "I can't agree to that."
“You can’t teach someone to like something, but if you want to experience other emotions, I can help you with that.”
No one asks others to teach them what they like.
“Alright.” Xi Qingxu quickly agreed. “I’m very grateful that you’re willing to help me.”
Lu Chuqing waved her hand, "It's okay, it's no big deal."
"The main problem is that you don't interact with people often. Just make more friends. If you can't make friends, I can introduce you to a few people with good personalities."
Xi Qingxu looked at her and nodded earnestly, "Okay, thank you."
With the unexpected "like" resolved, Lu Chuqing went back to her room because it was too cold outside, and Xi Qingxu didn't linger and also left the balcony.
In the room, Lu Chuqing still felt a headache coming on when she thought about it, and couldn't help but mutter, "What an ignorant little brat."
As night deepened, the boy on the single bed was still not sleepy.
My good friend...
She said yes, so that's it.
After the start of autumn, temperatures plummeted. After a few autumn rains, the autumn clothes that hadn't even been worn for two days were no longer enough to keep out the chill, and people quickly switched to sweaters and light jackets to keep warm.
Lu Chuqing was first in her class again in the midterm exams, but her ranking in the grade dropped two places. Liu Zhang, who had said he would surpass her, ranked second in the class by three points, falling behind Lu Chuqing once more. The boy's face was extremely ugly, and he vented his resentment on his deskmate.
His deskmate's desk was broken. After telling the teacher, they found out there were no extra desks, so they just tightened the screws and used it as is.
As the weather grew colder, his deskmate, whose family was clearly poor, was wearing thick, warm sweaters while everyone else was wearing a coat under his school uniform. He was so cold that his nose was constantly running, and he didn't have enough tissues to blow his nose. He had to get hot water to warm himself up during each class.
However, Liu and Zhang kept bringing up the fact that the other person had a runny nose, and loudly uttered those deliberately sarcastic remarks.
Lu Chuqing didn't really want to get involved; having lived a second life, many of her ideas had changed.
You could say she's cold-blooded, or that her silence makes her an accomplice, but it's not like no one in the class is speaking up for her.
Just like Nangong Yu, he spoke up for Liu Zhang because he couldn't stand him.
But that boy was really timid and cowardly. After speaking up for him, he didn't stand up for himself; instead, he became even more afraid.
As time went on, no one spoke up for him anymore.
Liu Zhang couldn't stand Lu Chuqing, so he kept looking for opportunities to bully his deskmate.
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