Chapter Thirty-Five: Who did you want to marry back then?
At the time, several gossipy women and idlers who were enjoying the cool shade under the locust tree were pointing and laughing secretly, saying that Zhang Chunxue had taken advantage of the city's cultured people.
Is Zhang Chunxue the kind of person who would suffer in silence?
She immediately raised her eyebrows, widened her almond-shaped eyes, put her hands on her hips, and gave those gossiping people a thorough dressing-down!
"Laugh! What are you laughing at! You're making me laugh so hard I could fall out! He's an educated person from the city, here to support our village's development! Here to suffer and toil! All of you, stop spouting nonsense and don't pollute his ears with your foul language!"
She deftly helped the dizzy young man, who nearly fell face-first into the mud, steady him, and even casually reached out to pat the dust off his clothes.
"Hey, young man, are you alright? The roads in our village are full of potholes, nothing like the smooth cement roads in your city. You're in for a long time to suffer!"
She remembered looking him up and down several times, secretly marveling at him.
This young man is really handsome, with fair and delicate skin, like he stepped out of a New Year's painting. The scholarly air about him is something that we peasants can never learn.
She even teased him with a smile: "Oh my, you're such a handsome young man, and so refined, like a young lady. How can you, with your thin arms and legs, endure the hardships of life in the countryside?"
Thinking of this, Zhang Chunxue couldn't help but smile faintly.
Little did she know that the eighteen-year-old youth she thought was frail and delicate, who she estimated would cry and beg to return to the city after only a few days, would actually stay in this impoverished and remote mountain village for more than a decade without saying a word.
Zhang Chunxue suddenly came to her senses. The smile on her face had not completely faded, but it was replaced by a trace of melancholy.
"Speaking of which, didn't all those educated youth return to the city one after another last year? Why...why don't you go back to the city? Aren't your family members worried about you? You're not getting any younger, and you're still not married."
Song Xingzhi's steps remained composed, and his expression remained gentle.
“They’re anxious, of course they’re anxious. But I’ve explained everything to them, and they respect my wishes. Besides, I have an older brother, so it’s not my place to worry about carrying on the family line.”
Upon hearing this, Zhang Chunxue's heart skipped a beat, and she was momentarily at a loss for words.
Song Xingzhi seemed to see through her thoughts, and looked over with his clear eyes, a faint smile on his face.
"Sister Chunxue, don't you want to know what I told my family?"
Zhang Chunxue's heart skipped a beat.
She almost instinctively guessed that he must have told her about it.
That slight panic and unease quietly resurfaced from the bottom of my heart.
But since things had gotten this far, I couldn't just stay silent and pretend to be stupid forever.
She swallowed hard, her voice strained, "What...what did you say?"
Song Xingzhi's gaze remained fixed on her face, a gaze that carried no aggression, yet was like a deep pool that could draw one in.
“I told my family that I already had someone I liked in the village.”
Zhang Chunxue's breath hitched, and her heart pounded even faster, as if it were about to leap out of her throat.
Song Xingzhi's voice continued, unhurriedly, "It's just... it's just that she's already married and has a family. So, I want to stay in the village. Just being able to watch over her from afar is enough."
Zhang Chunxue's voice trembled slightly: "I...I don't understand you at all! Secretary Song, why are you doing this? All these years...haven't you...haven't you met any other women who could move your heart?"
Seeing her anxious and angry expression, Song Xingzhi was not angry at all; instead, he chuckled softly.
"Sister Chunxue, you may not know this, but people from the Song family are like this at heart."
“My great-grandfather fell in love with my great-grandmother at first sight. Later, he went to great lengths and went through a lot of trouble to finally marry her.”
"It was the same with my grandfather's generation, and my second grandfather's generation. And it was the same with my father, my eldest uncle, and all the uncles and aunts in my second grandfather's family. To be honest, in my generation, my eldest brother was the same."
“Our Song family is full of love-struck fools. So, I told my family what I was thinking. Although they were worried about me, they were also very understanding.”
As he said this, a gentle smile appeared on his lips. There was no trace of reluctance or bitterness in that smile; instead, it carried a sense of relief and determination.
“My grandfather often said that there was nothing wrong with me staying in the village to build up the countryside. He also felt that there was nothing wrong with me staying here to take care of you.”
"In this life, you always need something to look forward to, something to strive for, to make life meaningful. If you like someone, as long as she is doing well and you feel at peace, that's enough."
Listening to Song Xingzhi's heartfelt words, Zhang Chunxue felt a mix of emotions, like a jumbled mess of feelings.
It was a feeling of being moved, a feeling of guilt, a feeling of heartache, and a touch of something else that was hard to explain.
Her eyes were slightly hot, and as she looked at Song Xingzhi, her voice was a little hoarse: "Secretary Song... the way you put it makes me feel... I really feel like I've let you down."
Upon hearing this, Song Xingzhi simply smiled gently, his smile as clear and bright as the wind blowing through the mountains.
"This is all my own choice, it's my own decision, and it has nothing to do with you."
He paused, a glint in his eyes: "What is there to be ashamed of or not ashamed of? I chose this path myself, and I have to finish it even if I have to crawl on my knees. Besides, I am happy to do it."
Zhang Chunxue opened her mouth, a strange emotion churning in her chest.
Yes, she's already died once and lived a second life, so what's there to hide? What's there to be ashamed of?
She didn't want to have any regrets in this life!
Thinking of this, she took a deep breath, as if she had made up her mind.
"Well, actually... there's something I've been keeping to myself and haven't told anyone."
Seeing her serious expression, Song Xingzhi also became serious: "Sister Chunxue, what do you want to say?"
Zhang Chunxue bit her lower lip, as if she found it difficult to speak: "Back then... after my husband passed away, to be honest, I... I also considered finding another partner."
Song Xingzhi was suddenly stunned, his steps faltering, and a look of disbelief and astonishment flashed across his face.
Zhang Chunxue didn't look at him and continued, "But later, my sons, especially Chengren, all disagreed and made a big fuss, so I... I gave up on that idea."
Song Xingzhi's Adam's apple bobbed, his voice tightening with a barely perceptible tension: "Sister-in-law...you...you're telling the truth? Then...then back then, who...who did you want to marry?"
When he asked that question, his heart was in his throat, afraid of hearing a name he didn't want to hear.
Continue read on readnovelmtl.com
