Chapter 90: The world is silent, the prince is crazy
On the old bed in the west wing of Prince Duan's Mansion, Xiao Jin suddenly opened his eyes.
The dust on the tent ceiling drifted in the dim candlelight, and the air was filled with a rotten, musty smell, mingled with a faint medicinal aroma—the scent left by the imperial physician's pulse check. He moved his fingers, feeling a tearing pain in his palm. He remembered that it was from scaling the palace wall yesterday. The wound had been bandaged, wrapped in thick white cloth, but it still couldn't stop the excruciating pain.
"Zhi'er..." He spoke hoarsely, his voice like sandpaper, his throat dry and painful. He struggled to sit up, his eyes frantically scanning the room, searching for the white figure. "Zhi'er! Where are you? Come out!"
The guards guarding the bed quickly stepped forward to support him, their voices filled with cautious concern: "Your Highness, are you awake? The imperial physician said that your impatience has damaged your heart meridians, and you need to rest well..."
"Rest assured!" Xiao Jin pushed the guard away with such force that he stumbled back two steps and slammed into the wall. He threw back the blanket, stepped barefoot on the cold ground, and, ignoring the pain in his body, stumbled towards the door. "Where's Zhi'er? I need to find Zhi'er! She said yesterday she wanted to 'clear all grievances' with me, and she hasn't done it yet! She can't leave!"
"Your Highness!" The guards hurriedly chased after him and grabbed his arm tightly, "Miss Yun...Miss Yun has already..."
"Already what?" Xiao Jin turned around suddenly, his eyes bloodshot and bloodshot. His nails dug deep into the guard's arm, leaving several bloody marks. "Tell me! What happened to her? Did she leave with Xie Heng? Did she hide? Tell me now!"
The guard was so frightened by his gaze that he trembled all over, but he still gritted his teeth and whispered, "Yesterday... yesterday Miss Yun jumped off the palace wall. The guards... the guards have found her body and have... have buried her..."
"Body? Buried?" Xiao Jin repeated the two words as if he didn't understand, his eyes gradually becoming empty. "Impossible... You're lying to me! She's so smart, how could she jump down? She's just mad at me! She must be hiding to make me anxious! Find her quickly! Otherwise, I'll kill you!"
He suddenly flew into a rage, shoving the guards aside and running like a madman through the room, overturning tables and smashing teacups. He smashed everything in the room into a mess, with the pieces scattered all over the floor. He grabbed an old painting hanging on the wall—it was a casual osmanthus tree he had drawn when Yun Zhi first entered the palace—but now he ripped it down and tore it to pieces.
"You lied to me! You all lied to me!" He roared, tears streaming down his face as his voice tinged with sobs. "Zhi'er won't die! She promised me she would wait for me to atone for my sins! How could she leave first? How could she leave first!"
He fell to the ground amidst the debris, his knees scratched by porcelain shards, bleeding, but he was completely unaware. He held his head, his body shaking violently, repeating "Zhi'er" over and over in his mouth, sometimes crying, sometimes laughing, like a madman.
"Zhi'er, don't hide anymore. I know I was wrong. I won't force you anymore. I'll take you to Jiangnan to see the peach blossoms you love, okay?"
"Are you still blaming me? Blaming me for giving you the abortion drug? Blaming me for sending you to the Northern Di envoy? I'll change everything! I'll make up for it! Come out and scold me, hit me a few times, okay?"
"They said you were dead, but I don't believe it! You must be kidding me! When I find you, I'm going to punish you so severely that you can never leave my side again!"
The guards stood at the door, feeling uncomfortable watching him like this, but no one dared to step forward. They all knew that Yun Zhi's death was a devastating blow to the prince. He simply couldn't accept this reality and could only live in the lies he had woven.
After an unknown amount of time, Xiao Jin finally stopped and slumped onto the ground, staring blankly ahead. His hair was draped over his shoulders, tears still etched on his face, but a strange smile played at the corner of his mouth, as if he had thought of something.
"I know..." he murmured, slowly standing up, stumbling towards the dressing table, and picked up the hairpin that was broken into two pieces - it was the one Yun Zhi used back then. "She must be angry and hiding on purpose, wanting me to find her. As long as I find her, she will forgive me..."
He clutched the hairpin in his hand, turned and rushed to the door, ordering the guards: "Pass on my order! Send someone to investigate immediately! Find out Xie Heng's whereabouts! Search all the places Yun Zhi might have gone! Jiangnan, Saibei, the villas on the outskirts of the city... Even if we have to dig three feet underground, we must find her! Alive or dead!"
"Your Highness, Miss Yun's body has already..." The guard wanted to persuade him, but was glared at by Xiao Jin.
"Shut up!" Xiao Jin's voice was filled with undeniable madness. "That's not her! That's someone else pretending to be her! Xie Heng deliberately made a fake corpse to get her to go with him! If you dare say another word, I'll cut off your tongue!"
The guard was so frightened that he dared not say anything. He could only bow his head and turn around to pass on the order.
Xiao Jin watched the guard's back as he left, a strange smile curling up at the corner of his mouth. He walked to the osmanthus tree in the corner of the yard, reaching out to touch the rough trunk, as if talking to someone: "Zhi'er, wait, I'll find you soon. When that time comes, we'll never be apart again, okay?"
The wind blew through the branches of the osmanthus tree, making a rustling sound, like a silent response, or like a sigh, dissipating in the silent night.
The next morning, Xiao Jin and his guards personally went to the outer wall of the imperial palace. The bloodstains on the bluestone slab where Yun Zhi had jumped yesterday had been cleaned away, leaving only a faint trace, faintly visible in the morning light.
He squatted on the ground, stroking the mark with his fingers, his eyes obsessed: "Zhi'er, were you waiting for me here yesterday? Was it because I was late that you left in anger? Don't worry, I will find you, I will definitely find you..."
He squatted under the palace wall for the whole day, without eating or drinking, repeating Yun Zhi's name over and over again, sometimes crying, sometimes laughing, attracting passers-by to stop and watch, pointing at him - everyone knew that Prince Duan was crazy, completely crazy, and he didn't even care about his own life for a dead woman.
As the sun set, the guard approached cautiously and handed him a piece of dry food: "Your Highness, you haven't eaten for a day. Please eat a little..."
Xiao Jin waved away the rations, causing them to fall to the ground, rolling several times and becoming covered in dust. He stood up abruptly, glaring fiercely at the guards, "Who told you to interrupt my conversation with Zhi'er? She just told me she was waiting for me in Jiangnan, and you scared her away! I'll kill you!"
As he spoke, he rushed forward to hit the guard. The guard quickly dodged, but did not dare to fight back and could only dodge in embarrassment.
The surrounding people watched in fear, retreating one after another, fearing that they would be hurt by the mad Xiao Jin. The afterglow of the setting sun shone on him, stretching his shadow very long, and reflected on the palace wall like a twisted, desperate mark.
Xiao Jin was exhausted from fighting and collapsed on the ground, staring at the distant sky. His eyes became empty again. He pulled out the broken hairpin from his bosom, placed it in his palm, and gently stroked it. "Zhi'er, don't be angry. I'll go to Jiangnan to find you right now. You must wait for me, okay?"
As night fell, the wind beneath the palace wall grew colder, but Xiao Jin still sat there, like a statue without a soul, guarding the bloodstains that had long since disappeared, and guarding his self-deceiving lies.
He didn't know that the person he was looking for had already been left forever in the morning light of yesterday, on the bluestone slab stained red by the plain clothes, and would never return. And his "search" was nothing more than a long, endless self-torture, a sin that he would spend the rest of his life atoning for, and would never be able to pay off.
The world is silent, only his madness seems particularly poignant in this silent night.
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