Chapter 95: Revisiting the old place, full of illusions
The sweet aroma of osmanthus cakes filled the air again from the osmanthus cake shop on West Street in the capital. Golden cakes steamed in the steamer, attracting passing children to circle the shop. Xiao Jin stumbled over, leaning on a broken stick he had found, and sniffed hard—the smell was exactly the same as the one Yun Zhi had loved back then.
He looked even shabbier than he had six months ago: his hair was a tangled mass of dry grass, covered in mud and fallen leaves, casually tied behind his head with a tattered piece of cloth; the tattered cotton wool on his body had lost its original color, and the edges dragged on the ground, frayed and revealing his ankles that were frozen purple; the wrinkles on his face were so deep that they could trap snow grains, and his eyes were the only thing that would occasionally light up when he "saw" Yun Zhi, but the rest of the time they were as empty as two dry wells.
"Zhi'er..." He stared at the door of the shop, his throat making a hoarse sound, "You said you wanted to try the osmanthus cake from this shop. I'll take you to buy some, okay?"
Just then, a girl in plain clothes walked out of the shop, carrying a lunch box. Her hair was loosely tied up, and the hem of her plain clothes swayed gently in the wind. Her back looked 70% like Yun Zhi back then.
Xiao Jin's eyes lit up instantly, like a dying man grasping at a last straw. He forgot about the broken stick he was leaning on and stumbled forward. His bony fingers gripped the girl's wrist like a pair of pliers, his nails digging deep into the flesh, causing her to scream in pain.
"Zhi'er! You're finally back!" His voice was filled with crazy excitement, and tears fell uncontrollably, hitting the back of the girl's hand. "I knew you wouldn't abandon me! Have you forgiven me? Let's go home, back to the west wing, and I'll bake you some osmanthus cake, okay?"
The girl was so frightened that her face turned pale. She desperately tried to break free from his hand, crying, "Who are you? I'm not the Zhi'er you mentioned! Let me go! Help!"
The shop owner heard the noise and ran out in a hurry, still holding a rolling pin in his hand. When he saw that it was Xiao Jin, his face changed instantly - this madman had come to make trouble half a year ago, overturned the steamer in the shop, and said, "Your cakes are not delicious, Zhier doesn't like them." Later, it was the government officials who came and dragged him away.
"Crazy old man! Let this girl go!" The boss raised his rolling pin, but he didn't dare to hit her. He could only bluff and yell, "If you don't leave, I'll call the police!"
The pedestrians around also gathered around, but no one dared to step forward to help, they just pointed and talked from a distance -
"It's this crazy old man again. Last time, he overturned Aunt Wang's vegetable basket and said that the vegetables were poisoned for Zhi'er."
"I heard he was a prince before, but he went crazy because of a woman. How pitiful."
"What's there to be pitied about? I heard he forced the girl to death. This is karma!"
The voices of discussion pierced Xiao Jin's ears like needles, but he was completely unaware. He just held the girl's wrist tightly and kept repeating: "You are Zhi'er! Don't lie to me! Look, I brought you some osmanthus cake..." He reached into his arms and rummaged for a long time, but only took out a moldy, dry and hard piece of cake. He had begged for it three days ago and had kept it in his arms, reluctant to eat it.
The girl looked at the moldy cake in his hand, then looked at his crazy eyes, and cried even harder in fear: "I'm really not Zhi'er! My home is on East Street, and I'm here to buy cake for my mother! Let me go!"
At this moment, the girl's family arrived. It was her father, holding a carrying pole. Seeing his daughter being grabbed by a madman, his eyes immediately turned red. He rushed over and pushed Xiao Jin away: "You lunatic! How dare you bully my daughter!"
Xiao Jin lost his balance and fell heavily to the ground, the back of his head hitting the bluestone slab. The pain made his vision black. But he ignored the pain and climbed up to rush over to grab the girl, but the girl's father blocked him with a carrying pole: "If you come any closer, I will break your legs!"
The girl, protected by her family, stared at him in shock, her eyes filled with fear. The shop owner took the opportunity to move the steamer into the house and slammed the door shut. The pedestrians around him retreated, quickly surrounding Xiao Jin. However, no one dared to approach, as if they were looking at a wild beast that could hurt people.
Xiao Jin looked at the plain-clothed girl, shielded by the crowd. As she receded further and further away, the light in his eyes gradually faded, leaving only a deep sense of loss. He stumbled back two steps, then suddenly crouched on the ground, clutching his head, sobbing like a trapped animal. "You're not Zhi'er... Then where's my Zhi'er? Where's she? Doesn't she want me anymore?"
He cried, laughed, and repeated the word "Zhi'er" over and over again, his voice growing fainter and fainter until it turned into a muttering. Passersby walked around him. One child tried to throw a stone at him, but his mother held him back, saying, "Don't mess with him! A madman can kill people without paying for it."
After an unknown amount of time, the sun gradually set in the west. The wind carried flakes of snow, stinging his face painfully. Xiao Jin slowly stood up, leaning on the broken stick he had picked up, and walked aimlessly forward. He walked through West Street, East Alley, and past the courtyard where Yun Zhi had lived. The gate to the courtyard was still locked, and vines covered the walls, like a wall separating him from the past.
He walked to the foot of the palace wall, looked up at the towering vermilion wall, gently touched the wall with his fingers, and began to talk nonsense again: "Zhi'er, did it hurt when you jumped from here? I jumped once later, but I didn't die. They saved me... Am I useless? I can't even die. I don't even have the right to accompany you..."
The snowflakes grew larger and larger, turning into snowflakes, which fell one by one on his tattered cotton and his hair, soon forming a thin layer that dyed him white. However, he seemed to feel nothing, still leaning on the broken wooden stick, walking slowly along the palace wall, like a child who couldn't find his home.
When it was completely dark, he returned to the thatched cottage. The thatched roof was leaking again, and snow flakes drifted in through the cracks, landing on the plain wooden box. He hurried over, plugged the leak with a piece of rags, and carefully wiped the snow off the box, his voice as gentle as if coaxing a child: "Zhi'er, it's snowing, are you cold? I'll cover you with rags, don't freeze..."
The snow fell heavier and heavier, like shredded cotton wool, dancing all over the sky. Soon, a thick layer of snow accumulated on the thatched roof of the thatched cottage, shrouding the entire cottage in a blanket of white. Even the holes in the roof were blocked by snow. Inside the cottage, Xiao Jin, hugging a plain wooden box, curled up in a corner. Gradually, his voice faded, leaving only the occasional mumbling in his sleep: "Zhi'er... don't go..."
Snowflakes fell silently on the thatched cottage, as if to bury all sins and regrets beneath the endless expanse of snow. But everyone knows that some things, even if buried by snow, will never disappear - just like Xiao Jin's regrets, just like that past entangled with love and hate, which will forever remain beneath these palace walls, in this thatched cottage, and on every snowy winter day, reminding the world that some mistakes, once made, can never be made right.
The next morning, the snow stopped. A passing woodcutter saw the thatched cottage half-buried in snow, shook his head, and walked around it. No one wanted to approach the place where a madman lived, and no one knew that the person in the cottage was still holding the plain wooden box, dreaming a dream from which he would never wake up.
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