Chapter 41. Starting a New Life.
In the seventeenth year of Emperor Renxuan of the Great Qi Dynasty, in the height of summer.
It was the height of summer in Yangzhou, but thankfully it was still early morning, and the courtyard was shaded by thick greenery, so it wasn't too hot. Two gray sparrows perched on the eaves of a nearby house, watching the students inside who were reading aloud with their teachers, whispering to each other as if they could understand a little of what they were saying.
"Xiao Mi, you're here so early today?"
Upon hearing this gentle voice, Shen Mi turned her gaze away from the two chirping gray sparrows and looked in the direction of the voice. Who else could it be but Su Xingjian who was calling her?
She lifted her skirt and climbed the steps, smiling as she replied to Su Xingjian, "You woke up early, so you came early. Brother Ziyou, you're not handling official business at the Yangzhou government office today, how come you have time to come to the prefectural school?"
Su Xingjian added agarwood to the incense burner next to him, then put the lid back on and smiled warmly at Shen Mi: "I haven't had much to do lately, so I thought I'd come and listen to our Teacher Shen teach these students."
"I only have a slight understanding, Brother Ziyou, please don't flatter me further." Shen Mi didn't stand on ceremony with Su Xingjian and casually sat down in the armchair next to him.
When Shen Mi first came to Runyang, she was no longer the concubine of the Crown Prince. Su Xingjian always addressed her as Miss Shen, and she also addressed Su Xingjian by his official title. However, as time went by, they became estranged, so Su Xingjian asked her to call him by his courtesy name, "Ziyou".
However, a woman's nickname could only be used by her parents, close relatives, and husband. She told Su Xingjian that her nickname was ultimately inappropriate, so she came up with a compromise and asked Su Xingjian to call her "Xiao Mi" directly, just as the Empress had called her before.
Su Xingjian brewed tea for her and pushed the Ru kiln porcelain teacup in front of her. "If those students knew that Madam Shen, who comes to teach them calligraphy every now and then, is a student of Master Lu, the number one calligrapher in the world, they would probably follow you to Runzhou and pester you to teach them calligraphy."
When Shen Mi first arrived in Runyang, she found her mother's old house and used the money she brought from the Eastern Palace to have it renovated. She moved back into her mother's old house in Runzhou. However, when she left Bianjing, she fled in a hurry and was afraid that carrying too much gold and silver would attract the attention of villains. By the time she finished renovating her mother's old house, she didn't have much money left. If she wanted to live in Runzhou for a long time, she couldn't just sit around and eat her meager savings. So she opened a teahouse outside Runzhou and made a small profit, which was enough to cover her and Cuiwei's daily expenses.
As for opening a teahouse, it would also fulfill her father and brother's last wish. When her father and brother were alive, they said that it would be best if there were some teahouses inside and outside the city walls where travelers could rest. When they went out to fight for the last time, they also decided that they would start to do this after their triumphant return. Unfortunately, they never came back. Although she wanted to fulfill this wish at the time, she was too young, and her mother fell ill after hearing the news that her husband and son had died on the battlefield. Therefore, she did not have the opportunity to do this.
Four years ago, she arrived in Runzhou. With money, leisure, and the will, she was able to start a teahouse. Since it was convenient for travelers to rest, she didn't choose expensive or rare teas, only those affordable for ordinary people. She was very skilled at preparing tea. On weekdays, Cuiwei would help brew tea for customers who preferred loose-leaf tea, while she would prepare tea for those with more discerning palates. Offering both loose-leaf and prepared teas, and located within the city walls of Runzhou, the teahouse attracted many customers.
Later, Su Xingjian was transferred to serve as the prefect of Yangzhou. One day, he saw her practicing calligraphy and asked her if she knew Lu Lin. She had no reason to hide anything from Su Xingjian, so she admitted that she had been Lu Lin's student for two or three years.
Su Xingjian admired Lu Lin and appreciated her talent, so he extended a warm invitation to her to teach calligraphy to the students at the Yangzhou Prefectural School, with a salary double that of other teachers.
Shen Mi was initially reluctant, after all, the rules and regulations for women in this dynasty were rather strict, let alone going to the prefectural school to teach calligraphy to a group of students. Moreover, if she were to teach calligraphy to these students at the Yangzhou prefectural school, she would have to settle down in Yangzhou. However, she couldn't bear to give up her newly opened teahouse, nor could she bear to leave her mother's old residence in Runzhou.
However, Su Xingjian said that as long as she was willing to come, she didn't have to come every day like the other teachers. She could just come once every five days, and he wouldn't let the other teachers have any objections.
Shen Mi hesitated for a moment. After all, she was able to leave Bianjing smoothly and have a different life in Runzhou thanks to Su Xingjian's help. She owed Su Xingjian a favor. Seeing Su Xingjian's warm invitation, she couldn't refuse, so she agreed to give it a try.
When she actually started teaching calligraphy to these students at the Yangzhou Prefectural School, she was surprised to find that they never looked down on her because she was a woman. On the contrary, they treated her with great respect, calling her "Teacher Shen" repeatedly. Over time, she was happy that her talent was recognized here. She no longer needed to curry favor with Gu Zhan or the Empress as she had done in the Eastern Palace. She only needed to do her job well. Whether it was the students at the Prefectural School or the other teachers, they all treated her with great respect. Thus, she received this kindness for four years.
Shen Mi pulled her thoughts away from the past and simply smiled without replying to Su Xingjian's praise.
Just as they were talking, the sound of reciting texts in the school across the way gradually stopped, and was replaced by laughter and chatter.
Groups of students squeezed out of the school. They were all teenagers, wearing white scholar's robes and square headscarves, looking very energetic.
Shen Mi looked at them and gently curved her lips into a smile.
She was fifteen when her father and brother died in battle, eighteen when she married Gu Zhan, and twenty when she escaped from the Eastern Palace. Now, four years have passed in the blink of an eye, and she is twenty-four.
After experiencing many things, she finds it difficult to return to the innocence and brightness of her teenage years, and her attitude towards people and things has become somewhat indifferent. However, whenever she sees these young students, she always recalls how vibrant she was ten years ago.
Su Xingjian's gaze had been subtly fixed on her. Seeing her smiling as she held her teacup, he said, "At first, I was worried that you would be reluctant to teach them, since children are always noisy. But now it seems that Xiao Mi likes them very much."
Now that he's past thirty, he can easily mistake these fifteen- or sixteen-year-old students for children.
Shen Mi nodded gently: "Who doesn't make trouble at this age? Many of them went from Yangzhou Prefectural School to Bianjing, and after passing the imperial examination, they became generals and ministers of the Great Qi. It is my good fortune to be able to have them call me 'Teacher Shen' when they were studying."
Su Xingjian smiled and said, "Seeing you so happy makes me feel like my friend wasn't all for nothing."
Someone spotted Shen Mi first and exclaimed with delight, "Teacher Shen, you've arrived so early today!"
When the other students heard what he said, they also looked over and greeted Shen Mi with bows.
A student came over with a rolled-up sheet of Xuan paper. "Teacher Shen, I practiced calligraphy again after returning home, following your previous instructions. Please give me some pointers."
The others were naturally not satisfied with his actions and immediately began to scramble for it.
Su Xingjian put away his smile in front of Shen Mi and adopted the airs of a prefect, saying, "Do what you're supposed to do when you're supposed to do it. It's not class time now, so go back."
Shen Mi always appeared easy to get along with, so the students were less reserved in her presence. However, they all held Su, the prefect of Yangzhou, in awe of his young age.
Therefore, as soon as Su Xingjian's voice turned cold, the students who had been gathered together immediately withdrew respectfully.
Seeing the group of students slink away, Shen Mi couldn't help but chuckle. She turned to Su Xingjian and said, "Since you said they were just children, why bother arguing with them?"
"Initially, we invited you to the Yangzhou Prefectural School just to give you a change of scenery and a change of mood. You have a good temper, and you don't really refuse when these students pester you. How can we let them take advantage of us?" Su Xingjian used the lid of his teacup to skim the foam off the tea. "Besides, I see that you don't look very well today. There are dark circles under your eyes. Did you not sleep well last night?"
Shen Mi paused. It would have been better if he hadn't brought it up, because it reminded her of last night's dream.
But she didn't want to mention the details to Su Xingjian, and only vaguely said, "I keep dreaming about things from the past lately, maybe I haven't been sleeping well."
She left Bianjing in a hurry that day, boarding a boat heading south on the Bian River, and knew nothing about what happened after her "death".
Su Xingjian lowered his eyes slightly, recalling what happened after Shen Mi left four years ago, and his feelings were somewhat complicated.
After Shen Mi left, she heard that Gu Zhan sat in front of the ruins of Qingluan Palace in thin clothes for a whole night, and then fell seriously ill. He claimed to be sick and did not attend court for many days until after Shen Mi's "seventh day after death".
According to the rules, Shen Mi's epitaph should have been written by the Ministry of Rites, which summarized her life's achievements, and a Hanlin scholar from the Hanlin Academy was invited to write the epitaph. However, Gu Zhan rejected this request.
He was a man who always placed great importance on rules and etiquette, yet he made an exception, referring to Shen Mi as "my wife" in her epitaph. After writing the epitaph for her, he didn't have a craftsman carve it on a stone tablet; instead, he held a carving knife himself and carved it stroke by stroke. He had never done anything like this before, and always felt that his carving wasn't good enough, striving for perfection. He carved it many times over several days, until his hands were covered in blood from the carving knife, before finally obtaining a version that he was most satisfied with.
At the time, Su Xingjian was still the Crown Prince's tutor. Although according to the rules, he should have dissuaded Gu Zhan from such impolite behavior, he did not do so and only watched from the sidelines. Yang Ping, on the other hand, had advised him many times, believing that as the crown prince, how could he be so heartbroken over a woman?
In Su Xingjian's memory, that was the first time Gu Zhan addressed his uncle Yang Ping by his given name, and also the first time he had ever been angry with Yang Ping.
Gu Zhan hadn't shaved his beard for several days, and he looked extremely haggard compared to before, completely unlike the refined and noble figure rumored to be. Without looking at Yang Ping, he said coldly, "Yang Ping, this is my family matter. You have overstepped your bounds. Get out."
Yang Ping wanted to dissuade him, but seeing Gu Zhan's gloomy face, he ultimately stopped himself from trying to persuade him further.
After Yang Ping left, Gu Zhan suddenly asked Su Xingjian, who was standing to the side, "Ziyou, do you also think that I deserve to suffer such pain of losing my wife?"
Although Su Xingjian really wanted to answer yes, he held back and only followed the etiquette of a subject, saying, "Your Highness is the Crown Prince, so of course he is not guilty. Perhaps Consort Shen is just unlucky."
Gu Zhan seemed not to hear him, gave a self-deprecating laugh, and said, "Never mind, why should I ask you these questions?"
Then he waved for him to leave.
Besides, Shen Mi was only a concubine of the Crown Prince during her lifetime, and was not considered Gu Zhan's wife. Even though he petitioned to have her clothes and hat buried with the rites of a principal wife, according to the rites, she could not be posthumously honored as the Crown Princess. Therefore, the inscription on her tombstone could only read "Concubine Shen". However, Gu Zhan still insisted on wearing the mourning clothes for her, imitating the rites of a husband mourning his wife in the common people. On the day of the funeral, he even carried a cane and escorted the coffin out of the city on foot.
This matter was so grand that it became a household name, and the officials in the censorate were very dissatisfied with it and repeatedly impeached him, but he ignored them.
Just when everyone thought that His Highness the Crown Prince would continue to decline, he regained his composure on the eighth day, attending court every day without fail to handle state affairs, completely different from the person he had been for the past seven days.
But that's not the case.
Gu Zhan ordered his men to rebuild the burned-down Qingluan Palace, making it exactly the same as the original, with all the furnishings retaining the appearance of the Qingluan Palace in his memory.
He also severely punished the palace servants who had presumptuously misjudged Shen Mi's intentions while Shen Mi was imprisoned and who had deprived Shen Mi of his material possessions. The mastermind was executed by beating, and all the subordinate palace servants were expelled from the Eastern Palace, as if this could slightly alleviate his guilt.
Standing before the newly rebuilt Qingluan Palace, he recalled how, during the months he had imprisoned Shen Mi, he would be driven by his old habits to return to the Qingluan Palace every now and then, gazing at the palace walls and lingering there. He couldn't help but come to see Shen Mi, but when he remembered Shen Mi saying she hated him, scolded him, and said that if she had a choice, she would never marry him, all the feelings of longing in his heart suddenly dissipated.
He was the crown prince, second only to the emperor. How could he bow down and submit to a woman for the sake of personal feelings? Especially a woman who repeatedly called him by his name, spoke rudely to him, and might even have an affair with one of his subjects. His lofty pride would not allow him to do such a thing.
But he always felt that as long as the woman inside was willing to admit her mistake and soften her stance, he could wipe the slate clean, provided that the one who bowed down first was Shen Mi.
Later, Shen Mi really did give in. On the day of their second wedding anniversary, she chose to leave him by jumping into a well.
Upon hearing this news, the first emotion that surged in Gu Zhan's heart was fear.
He was afraid that Shen Mi would leave him forever, so he went to the Qingluan Palace, but he didn't wait for Shen Mi to wake up from her coma, nor did he see her one last time.
Shen Mi locked herself in the Qingluan Palace from the inside and set herself on fire. Not only was her body not found intact, but she also left no belongings. All Gu Zhan could find were a few pieces of calligraphy that Shen Mi had left behind when she copied official documents for him in the Qinzheng Palace and served him with writing materials. So he had them framed and hung in his own palace.
There was also the sachet that Shen Mi had once embroidered for him. He had carelessly tossed it somewhere, and later he had practically turned the entire Qin Zheng Hall upside down before finally finding it. He, who never liked wearing any jewelry, never took that sachet off his body day and night.
It was as if by doing this, Shen Mi would always be by his side, never leaving him.
At first, when he had trouble sleeping at night, he would choose to go to the Qingluan Palace to sleep, but he would not allow anyone to follow him or serve him. However, after several days, he found that when he went to the Qingluan Palace, he would be entangled by deep longing and guilt. So later, he stopped going to the Qingluan Palace.
From that time onward, Qingluan Palace and Consort Shen became taboo topics known to everyone in the Eastern Palace, and no one dared to mention them.
Even Gu Zhan himself dared not go to Qingluan Palace again, or rather, dared not face his past with Shen Mi.
But Su Xingjian would not mention a single word about Gu Zhan to Shen Mi. He knew all too well what a hypocritical person Gu Zhan was, whether it was out of a desire not to hurt her or out of some other reason, he himself dared not utter a word about his feelings.
He simply said, "Perhaps the weather has been too hot and humid lately. Such weather makes people prone to overthinking. I have just obtained some fine agarwood. When you return to Runzhou this evening, take it with you. Burn some agarwood before going to bed tonight. It will help dispel the summer heat and calm your mind."
Shen Mi agreed, "In the past few years in Runzhou and Yangzhou, I am very grateful to Brother Ziyou for taking good care of me. Otherwise, it would have been difficult for me and Cuiwei, both women, to settle down in this foreign land."
Su Xingjian raised his lips: "Since you call me 'Brother Ziyou', then I should at least fulfill my duties as an elder brother for Brother Shen. It's just a small favor. Besides, I'm very happy to see that you are doing well now."
Mentioning her brother, Shen Mi became somewhat distracted, but she quickly pulled herself out of her thoughts and asked, "Where is Yu Zhao? She came to Yangzhou last summer with Zhao Huai. It's about time this year. Why haven't you mentioned that they're coming?"
Su Xingjian put down his teacup. "This year, Yuzhao and Zhaohuai probably won't be coming to Yangzhou."
A hint of doubt appeared in Shen Mi's eyes. "Why is that?"
Su Xingjian sighed softly, “Yu Zhao has been kept at home by her father. Recently, they have been looking for a husband for her. Last year during the Spring Festival, she brought up the marriage between her and Zhao Huai with her father, hoping that he could arrange their marriage. However, her father refused and wouldn’t let her go out, fearing that she would run away and elope with Zhao Huai.” He paused for a moment and then said, “Although Zhao Huai was raised in our family since he was a child, he also made some contributions when fighting against the Dangxiang people in the north a few years ago. However, our dynasty has always valued civil administration over military achievements. He is also two years younger than Yu Zhao. Her father is not at ease entrusting Yu Zhao to him and does not approve this marriage unless he returns to study and passes the imperial examination.”
Perhaps fearing that Shen Mi might overthink things, he immediately added, "But rest assured, I have absolutely no intention of belittling the soldiers on the border."
Shen Mi didn't have any particular thoughts about this matter. After all, she only considered Su Xingjian a friend. Having known him for four years, she knew Su Xingjian's character better than anyone.
“Although I only met Zhaohuai once when he and Yuzhao came to Yangzhou two years ago, I could see his feelings for Yuzhao, and Yuzhao also had feelings for him. I hope that the two of them can eventually become a couple.” Shen Mi said softly. She then changed the subject and asked, “However, this year is already the fourth year that Brother Ziyou has served as the prefect of Yangzhou. Shouldn’t he be transferred back to the capital at the end of the year?”
Su Xingjian nodded, but said aloud, "I will probably submit a memorial requesting to continue serving as the prefect of Yangzhou."
"Why?" Shen Mi frowned slightly.
Su Xingjian's smile froze slightly. "Xiao Mi seems to really want me to be transferred back?"
“No, that’s not it. It’s just that Brother Ziyou has achieved a lot in Yangzhou these past few years, with outstanding political achievements. He will surely be promoted to a high-ranking position in the Imperial Academy upon returning to the capital, with a bright future ahead of him. So I’m a little confused as to why Brother Ziyou is willing to stay in Yangzhou,” Shen Mi quickly explained.
Su Xingjian's smile softened, and he said, "Yangzhou is a good place. I like it here very much, and I also like the people here."
Shen Mi didn't think much of it. "In that case, I also hope to stay here for the rest of my life."
Su Xingjian didn't continue the topic, after all, he didn't know if he could hide from his father's pressure to get married in Yangzhou for the rest of his life.
But he still wanted to wait until the day he had the chance to open his heart to Shen Mi.
The two of them often sit quietly, like they are now, neither of them speaking, just enjoying their tea in silence.
Su Xingjian looked at Shen Mi's profile and simply gave her a casual reminder: "Oh right, Xiao Mi, I forgot to tell you, things haven't been peaceful in Huizhou lately. It seems there's been a civil uprising, and some refugees might be heading to Runzhou. You should close your teahouse for a few days and avoid it for a while. Don't let those refugees hurt you."
Shen Mi was used to his gentleness. "Alright, thank you for reminding me, Brother Ziyou. I'll remember it."
After hesitating for a long time, Su Xingjian finally couldn't help but say, "If it really doesn't work, why don't you stay in Yangzhou for a few days? I have two empty courtyards at home. I'll send someone to bring Cuiwei over to keep you company. Yangzhou will be safer. If I'm in Yangzhou, I can protect you if anything happens."
Shen Mi was taken aback, but then politely declined Su Xingjian's offer without hesitation: "Brother Ziyou has already taken good care of me in the past few years. Cuiwei and I still live in Runzhou City. We just won't go to the teahouse for the next few days. It would be against the rules for me to stay at your residence. Brother Ziyou is not married yet, and I don't want to cause any rumors and tarnish your reputation."
Seeing Shen Mi's politeness, Su Xingjian felt somewhat dejected, but he did not insist. He simply said, "I am only making a suggestion. You can follow your own heart."
Shen Mi nodded, but didn't respond.
Bianjing (Kaifeng)
News of the Huizhou uprising quickly reached the capital, sparking heated discussions among court officials who should be sent to quell the rebellion.
Even the emperor, seated high in his hall, was troubled by this matter.
Gu Zhan, who was usually taciturn in court, stepped forward and said, "Your subject is willing to lead troops to Huizhou to quell the rebellion."
Immediately, someone in the court objected, "Absolutely not! Your Highness is of noble birth. Those rioters will kill and slash indiscriminately without any regard for consequences. What if Your Highness is injured?"
Gu Zhan said coldly, "So-called rebels are, in the end, still the people of the Emperor. As the Crown Prince, I led the troops south on behalf of the Emperor not only to quell the rebellion but also to appease the people and let the people of Great Qi understand that the Emperor has always treated all his subjects equally, so that they may be deeply enlightened and not cause any more trouble. I did this to fulfill my duty as a subject and to fulfill my filial duty as a son."
His words were so grand and righteous that no one in the court dared to object.
The Emperor was also greatly pleased by his words, saying, "The Crown Prince has made great progress in recent years and is much more composed than before. In my opinion, it is more appropriate for the Crown Prince to go south to Huizhou to comfort the people in my place. This is in line with my principles of being close to the people and fair and just. It is more appropriate than the previous suggestion to transfer troops from a certain prefecture and send a certain general to guard it."
Gu Zhan immediately bowed and expressed his gratitude: "Thank you, Your Majesty, for your understanding of my loyalty and filial piety. I will certainly live up to your expectations."
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