Everything will go as you wish.
I sat in the car, repeatedly pondering Gu Wanlin's words, "my family."
Unlike a few months ago when I first accompanied her to the hospital, and she tacitly accepted Director Liu calling me a "family member," in the days and nights we spent together, I could feel that the awkwardness and unease we felt when we first met had disappeared. She had also become more and more relaxed and natural in front of me, and she had long since gotten used to my help in many ways that she didn't want me to see back then.
She would not unnecessarily explain our relationship to our teachers, nor would she want to use "friends" as an excuse to hurt me. The word "family" already shows her respect and importance for me.
Many years ago, before our relationship changed, Gu Wanlin noticed that my passion had faded after the honeymoon phase. I explained at the time, "Because in my heart, I have already regarded you as family." She was extremely worried, saying that she didn't want our love to be worn down by daily life and lose its passion, leaving only bland family affection.
But we hadn't made any plans for living together in the future, and because we were separated by vast distances, it was impossible for us to get along as "family." What kind of "family" were we then? Ultimately, wasn't it our inability to become family that led to our separation?
I couldn't help but sigh inwardly. We had wasted so many years that should have been spent loving each other.
When Gu Wanlin addressed her as "Professor Yang," I immediately remembered who she was. Although I had never met this Professor Yang, I knew everything about Gu Wanlin at that time, just as she knew about my life.
Professor Yang had taught her two specialized courses and greatly admired Gu Wanlin. She had suggested that Gu consider pursuing a doctorate and taking an academic path, noting that the academic and industrial fields in finance are not far apart and have a very close collaborative relationship, offering flexibility. She felt that Gu Wanlin's qualifications were beyond question, and her personality was well-suited for research. She said that if Gu Wanlin wanted to pursue this path, she could recommend her to her academic connections in top overseas projects.
Gu Wanlin mentioned this to me, but she never even considered it. Firstly, she felt she might not be able to truly commit to a few years of austere doctoral life; secondly, it would mean we'd be apart for even longer. After she politely declined Professor Yang's offer, he still enthusiastically wrote her a strong recommendation for her master's application and became her thesis advisor.
I checked my watch; Gu Wanlin had been walking with Professor Yang for over an hour. It was still early spring, after all; even if the temperature was high at noon, it would drop quickly after noon. I told her to take her coat with her when she left, so I wasn't too worried about that.
However, she would never show any physical discomfort in front of her respected mentor. Not to mention whether she had properly relieved her stress and rested after sitting for so long, she had long since missed the time to drink water and urinate.
I took out the document I needed to revise and got busy, but I couldn't put it off. I kept staring at the screen, thinking that if I wasn't finished in half an hour, I'd have to call her.
Suddenly I heard a knocking sound on the car window. I turned around and saw Gu Wanlin smiling at me through the glass.
I got out of the car and found that Professor Yang had pushed her down. I was just thinking of calling her and then going up to pick her up. The distance from the lawn to the main building is not short. Gu Wanlin only brought a lightweight manual wheelchair today for convenience. It would be difficult for her to wheel herself over.
I greeted Professor Yang and opened the other car door for Gu Wanlin. Perhaps she didn't want to be carried around by me in front of Professor Yang, so she pulled out the transfer board and slowly moved herself into the passenger seat.
Professor Yang watched her the whole time as she was being transferred. He watched as Gu Wanlin's thin, fragile wrists supported her swaying upper body as she slowly moved into the car. She had to hold onto the car door handle with one hand to steady herself before she could use the other hand to pull her legs into the car. His eyes were full of affection and tenderness for his prized student.
Gu Wanlin settled into the car, turned to Professor Yang and smiled apologetically, "I was supposed to visit you when I got back, but now I have to ask you to drive me down, which has taken up your time."
Professor Yang waved his hand, "Xiao Gu, don't bother with these formalities. I didn't have anything else to do anyway, but I'll feel more at ease if I see you down."
Gu Wanlin smiled and said, "It's alright. I can do more and more things now. Look, I got on the bus quite well by myself. I will seriously consider what you said and give you an answer later."
As we were talking, I had already tucked her wheelchair into the trunk. Professor Yang saw this and said, "Then you should go back and rest early, keep exercising and take good care of your health. You also need to eat well; look how much weight you've lost." Although his tone still had the seriousness of a teacher and student, it also carried a touch of intimacy like that of an elder in a family.
Once the car was on the road, I couldn't help but ask, "What did Professor Yang talk to you about?"
Gu Wanlin said it was nothing, he just asked her what happened in the car accident, how serious her injuries were, and whether she could recover. After hearing that she couldn't, he inquired about her rehabilitation training. He also asked about her future plans.
Gu Wanlin pursed her lips. "I can't just stay at home doing nothing all the time. After this year of rehabilitation, I'll have to go back to work. Although there are still more than half a year left, to be honest, I'm quite worried. For the past year and a half, I've been either at home or in the hospital, seeing doctors, nurses, or fellow patients. I don't know if I can adapt to normal social interactions and work, or if my body can still handle the intensity of life I used to lead. I'll just take it one step at a time. If it really doesn't work out, then we'll see."
I asked her, "Did you also share this idea with Professor Yang?"
She smiled and said, "I did tell her, but I embellished it a little. I'm not used to appearing so negative in front of her."
"So she gave me a suggestion, or rather a proposal. She said that she has a professional course that she teaches in English this semester and next semester. The teaching materials are classic textbooks that have been used for many years, and the courseware is almost the same every year. It is good for students to lay a theoretical foundation, but it may have been out of touch with industry practice for too long. She knows where I used to work and thinks that if I were to be a guest lecturer and hold a few seminars in the second half of the course, focusing on introducing industry practice, it would be of great help to students when they apply for further studies abroad and find jobs. She thinks that this can also help me get back to normal life in advance."
Gu Wanlin is certainly suited for this. Her previous job was at one of the world's top institutions, a dream for anyone in this field, making her more than capable of teaching this material to undergraduates. Professor Yang's suggestion clearly came from a thoughtful perspective; it not only prepares Gu Wanlin for a return to work, allowing her to shine in her area of expertise, but also helps her regain her confidence and a sense of control over her life.
There's just one thing I'm worried about: "How many class hours did she say there were?"
Gu Wanlin said that Professor Yang said it was up to her and depended on her physical condition. She had the freedom to arrange her own course content. The course consisted of three class hours per week, and she could arrange three to four weeks of content, once every two weeks, or halve the class hours and extend the number of weeks. Gu Wanlin decided to do whatever was appropriate.
I turned to her and asked, "So what do you think?"
Gu Wanlin countered with, "What do you think?"
I said that the time commitment doesn't seem too much of a burden, and it's not like I can't squeeze out this little bit of time from my rehabilitation schedule. I also agree with what Professor Yang said about the benefits for you. If you want to do it, I will definitely fully support you.
Gu Wanlin smiled and nodded, "I am indeed quite interested. I'll talk to Dr. Kang Fu tomorrow, Monday, to see how to best arrange the time. I'll get back to Professor Yang after I've decided." Before she finished speaking, she looked around and exclaimed, "Hey, where are you driving to?"
I said let's go home. I never imagined that Professor Yang would drag you upstairs for another two hours. You must be exhausted. Let's go home early and lie down to rest. We can figure out what to eat for dinner when we get home.
Gu Wanlin clicked her tongue in dissatisfaction. "We agreed to eat at the place next to the school. I don't think I'm tired, I can manage." Then she tugged at my sleeve in a fawning manner. "Come on, I really want to eat there."
A thousand pieces of gold cannot buy Gu Wanlin's request to eat, so of course I'll drive wherever she points.
The next day, I consulted Dr. Kang Fu. Gu Wanlin would be sitting for almost three hours straight during the entire class, and considering the time spent traveling to and from the classroom, her health probably wouldn't be able to handle it. There weren't many places on campus where she could lie down and rest, and given her personality, even if she felt unwell, she would definitely grit her teeth and endure it. Dr. Kang Fu and I agreed that about an hour would be just right. So, she decided to return to Professor Yang's suggestion.
Professor Yang arranged eight weeks of material for her, starting in April, with one hour each time and several breaks in between, just in time for the end of the semester. She comforted Gu Wanlin, saying there was no need to feel pressured, as this was originally an experimental program, to be tried in the spring semester and then adjusted based on feedback in the fall semester.
That being said, Gu Wanlin was by no means a perfunctory person. From the moment she agreed to Professor Yang's request, she made 120% preparations. First, she obtained Professor Yang's teaching materials as a reference, listed where her industry experience could be used to supplement and expand upon the material, and finalized the outline with Professor Yang. Then, every day after returning home, she would lock herself in her study and bury herself in creating courseware and designing take-home projects.
Every time I push open the door to the study and see her sitting upright in front of the computer, engrossed in thinking about a problem, her focused expression as she unconsciously taps her knuckles lightly on the table with her wrist while thinking, I can't help but feel that Gu Wanlin is exceptionally charming when she is serious. It's exactly how I was captivated by her when I first met her.
We used to spend time together in the library, and I often watched her hands, so slender yet with distinct knuckles, their beautiful blue veins gleaming on the keyboard, flying across the keys. I'd often drift off into daydreams. Now, watching her tap each key with her little finger, I can't help but feel sad.
I picked her up to relieve the pressure. After putting her down, I took her hand; her little finger had been rubbing against the keyboard for a long time and was red. She didn't seem to notice at all. When she gets busy working, she easily forgets to take care of her body, so naturally I have to pay more attention to her.
She asked me, "Is your project progressing well lately?"
Two or three years ago, I keenly noticed that Japanese and Korean women's literature was beginning to emerge in the English-speaking literary world, winning numerous prestigious literary awards after being translated into English. However, its translation and introduction to China was almost nonexistent. I've read those books myself; East Asian women face strikingly similar dilemmas in growth, education, intimate relationships, and marriage and childbearing from childhood and adolescence to adulthood—they are truly a community of shared destiny. Introducing the works of Japanese and Korean women writers to China will undoubtedly resonate widely with contemporary young women.
This project was a long-term endeavor. After convincing my superiors to approve my proposal and negotiating the copyright, I took extra care at every step, treating it like my own child. Just selecting translators alone took a lot of effort. I rejected the so-called "renowned translators" recommended by department heads, all of whom were older men; I didn't trust them to understand these works. Instead, I sought out highly qualified female teachers in foreign language and literature departments at universities who were equally interested in these works.
The project is now in the final planning stage for publicity and distribution. This part is handled by other departments within the publishing house, but as the main person in charge of this project, I am also involved.
I looked back at Wanlin and said, "I'm quite busy, I hope it goes smoothly. I'm thinking of inviting the author to hold a symposium at our school. You know my advisor, she's a renowned scholar in the Chinese department and a pioneer in feminism. It would be perfect if she could be a guest speaker."
Gu Wanlin placed his hand over mine and rubbed my palm against it. "Don't worry, everything will be as you wish."
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