Want to ask but didn't ask
at night.
Diqu City.
Large patches of orange-red lights illuminated the sky, reducing the gorgeous blue color of the sky and making it look gray and dark like an abyss.
"Are you back?"
The rocking chair swayed back and forth, and the man in black lying on it looked up at the dark sky without turning his head, as if asking casually.
In the back, the faces of several palace servants waiting there turned pale. They hesitated and delayed, being vague and not daring to give a direct answer.
The person in the rocking chair did not rush, but waited quietly and patiently.
With a glance, several palace servants saw a person walking towards them from a distance. Their eyes lit up and they retreated silently, leaving the main field to Yuan Shi who was walking towards them.
Yuan Shi looked at them, then at the person in the rocking chair. The corners of his mouth twitched, and he resigned himself to his fate and walked forward, saying, "His Highness Changsheng must be on his way back. Perhaps, something happened along the way and delayed his journey for a while."
In the cool breeze, the rocking chair creaked and swayed slowly.
"That means he didn't come back..."
A faint human voice sounded, and in an instant it fell like an invisible boulder, and everyone behind knelt on the ground.
Yuan Shi swallowed hard and said weakly, "His Highness Changsheng must have been held up by something. Should I contact His Highness Changsheng and ask him?"
"No."
This time the person in the rocking chair refused directly.
Not allowing contact but still asking, maybe His Highness Changsheng simply forgot to go home for the New Year... Yuan Shi and the other palace servants lowered their heads, their hearts beating fast, not daring to say anything.
Everyone lay on the ground, sweat soaking their clothes from behind.
The night was quiet, and the creaking sound of the rocking chair was like a death warrant, each creak becoming more and more unbearable in the ears.
Just as Yuan Shi carefully raised his head and opened his mouth to struggle again, hurried footsteps suddenly sounded from the side.
"Your Highness Changsheng, Your Highness Changsheng is back—"
The creaking sound of the rocking chair suddenly stopped.
The people kneeling in the back suddenly breathed a sigh of relief, stood up quietly, and quickly retreated into the darkness behind.
The orange-red firelight shines quietly.
A light golden figure walked in the depths of the night. The familiar girl slowly stood at the blurred edge of the orange-red firelight, raised her pair of dark eyes and looked over from afar.
On the rocking chair, a man in elaborate black clothes slowly sat up straight, looked sideways at her, and said angrily, "Why are you here so late? Why don't you go back and get some rest?"
As he spoke the words of blame, a smile gradually appeared on his face.
Behind them, several palace servants who were walking quietly and quickly in the dim night suddenly stumbled.
If I really don’t come tonight, I don’t know what kind of trouble you will cause... Yuan Shi’s mouth twitched, and he subconsciously raised his sleeve to wipe the thin layer of sweat on his forehead. He lowered his head and walked faster.
At the junction of light and darkness, Jiang Jingyuan did not move forward, but quietly looked at the man in black in the center of the fire.
In the field of vision, sometimes blurry and sometimes clear, shadows of various colors overlap.
She stood at the junction of light and darkness, as if looking at another space or world that had nothing to do with her own.
Hearing this, Jiang Jingyuan did not answer, but a shallow and soft curve appeared on his lips.
This feeling is like standing outside the world and hearing the words of people in the world, but never thinking that they are asking questions to yourself.
I felt dazed, free, lazy, and so comfortable that I almost closed my eyes and fell asleep.
The firelight illuminated the center. Jiang Jingjian looked at her, his eyelids twitched, and the smile on his face gradually disappeared.
Jiang Jingjian stood up, frowned slightly, and walked towards the girl not far away.
"Jiang Jingyuan?"
The orange-red light in front of him was obscured by a shadow as thick as ink. Jiang Jingyuan suddenly came back to his senses, opened his mouth slightly, and raised his head.
His eyes fell on the face of the person in front of him, and after wandering for a while, he was suddenly fixed on his pair of dark eyes that were like black mist.
Those dark eyes, backlit by the light, seemed to be completely dissecting her...
Jiang Jingyuan abruptly withdrew his gaze and turned away.
As if she recalled something, she pursed her lips and replied belatedly, "To see you."
Jiang Jingjian looked at her deeply, took two steps back, and said with a chuckle, "Don't worry, you just came back and need to rest well."
Jiang Jingyuan turned his face to the side, the corner of his mouth moved slightly, and he said silently: "If I don't come, you will have to come to find me..."
Besides, she can run wherever she wants every day and she is free, but Jiang Jingjian can't leave the capital at all. When she comes back, she should take the initiative to visit him.
Thinking about this, Jiang Jingyuan turned back, lowered his eyes, and said calmly: "You are more important."
Jiang Jingjian immediately smiled.
He coughed lightly, unable to suppress it no matter how hard he tried. He reached out and took one of Jiang Jingyuan's sleeves, saying, "It's windy outside, let's go to the hall," and took her to the hall.
The brightly lit hall.
After the rustling sounds and the clattering of gold and jade, the hall returned to silence.
In the warmth, the wind blew back and forth through the half-open window, causing the candlelight to sway and the light and shadow to overlap.
In the study.
At the table, where the orange candlelight was the brightest, Jiang Jingjian was circling and dotting with a pen.
Not far in front of him, on the small couch, a girl in a light gold dress lowered her head slightly, picked up the pastry with chopsticks, and ate it quietly, bite by bite.
Not powdery, greasy or sweet, it is chewy and a little crispy, and goes well with light tea.
It’s not particularly delicious, but it’s not average either, but it’s quite tasty.
She seemed to be concentrating on eating, yet also seemed dazed and absent-minded, and did not notice that Jiang Jingjian in front of the table looked up at her several times without saying a word.
The slender pen paused in mid-air, and Jiang Jingjian raised his dark eyes, reflecting the orange-red firelight, but the firelight could not illuminate the depths of his dark and misty eyes.
It made his face look mysterious and unfathomable.
His eyes swept over the girl's face not far away, and when he lowered his eyes, they fell on the document, his eyes dark and unclear.
No, too, right...
He desperately wanted to know what happened to Jiang Jingyuan. He desperately wanted to know what had happened to Jiang Jingyuan outside during this period of time...
He was eager to ask her.
But Jiang Jingjian didn't ask, nor would he ask——
Jiang Jingyuan wouldn't tell him.
Jiang Jingyuan, perhaps because of distrust, or perhaps because of an inexplicable stubbornness that only wants to rely on her own efforts, she has a natural sense of alienation -
Even if you can talk to her, no one will ever feel that they are really close to her. No matter how close you are, there is always a layer of ice between you.
In fact, in Jiang Jingjian's vision.
Jiang Jingyuan was like a diligent little bird, working himself to the bone every day, only to return home angrily with only a piece of branch...
To be honest, it's a bit silly, so silly that it makes people feel helpless and sad.
He and she are both alike and different.
He didn't understand why she was so obsessed with fighting alone, even though she had a lot of things around her that she could use. If it were him, he would use all of them to achieve his goal.
Jiang Jingyuan was cold, but she also wrapped the sharpness and edge of her coldness with a layer of gentleness for fear of hurting others. The gentleness and coldness permeated each other until she was fifteen, when the coldness prevailed.
But now...
Jiang Jingjian closed his eyes and let out a silent breath.
I don’t know what happened, but the gentleness in her emerged like an iceberg, and in this gentleness and tenderness, there was strangely a hint of depression.
This child... Jiang Jingjian could only sigh inwardly.
He had said it before, both openly and secretly, that as long as Jiang Jingyuan stayed in the capital and stayed by his side, at least no blind creatures would come near her, but if she went outside... ha, who knew whether she would meet a human or a ghost.
The ink pen fell on the paper, and Jiang Jingjian continued to circle and dot absentmindedly.
But Jiang Jingyuan didn't tell him, so he had no way to comfort him.
In fact, people are both extremely good and extremely evil. People use what they think is the darkest thinking to speculate about others, but their malice is endless, which makes them appear naive.
I can only...
Just get used to it, and you won’t be sad once you get used to it.
On the small couch, Jiang Jingyuan placed the remaining cakes and chopsticks on the small table beside him, and quietly nestled into the depths of the couch.
She lowered her head and looked at her outstretched hands, her thoughts already flying far away.
“Didn’t you know from the beginning…?
"You clearly knew it, so why did you show such a belated look of regret and heartache?"
Jiang Jingyuan muttered to himself.
Countless images emerged in her mind, from that night conversation.
Jiang Yunshu had wanted to ask the Patriarch countless times before: "Why do you want to be a human? Is it happier to be a human, or... is it easier to control a person with emotions and desires?"
But every time the words came to his lips, Jiang Yunshu forced himself to hold them back and not ask.
It's useless.
What’s the point of asking?
Can it free her from suffering from now on? Or can it erase everything she has experienced in the past?
It's useless, it's a waste of energy to ask.
Jiang Jingyuan faced the wall, with his back to Jiang Jingjian, and slowly lay down on his side on the small couch.
A light complaint or question made her look even more naive and ridiculous.
Jiang Yun can't leave the Jiang family...
However, Jiang Yunshu couldn't swallow this anger - or rather, she didn't want to be depressed until her death.
She walked around and around in the Jiang family's ancestral land. Jiang Yunshu was actually thinking all the time, wondering whether she should take revenge on the Jiang family.
She was hesitant, but she still put the things in various places in the Jiang family's ancestral land at that time -
She is struggling now, and this is what she is thinking now.
But if she doesn't leave something behind now, she won't have the chance to give the Jiang family a big gift later.
But she has left something behind now, and whether she will use it or not depends on her future thoughts, she can go forward or backward.
later……
"Xiao Shu, don't be afraid."
She had thought, had thought...had thought she was going to do something wrong.
Jiang Jingyuan pursed his lips, and the corners of his mouth curved up, but a cold light flashed in his dark eyes.
"Xiao Shu, you must come back..."
The soft voice in my memory lingers.
Come back? Back to the Jiang family?
Jiang Jingyuan's eyes darkened.
They were right, she did have a bad temper. Jiang Louguo also had a point; she couldn't tolerate them reveling over her corpse.
If Jiang Yunshu's body was left behind, they would cut her flesh and blood inch by inch, trying to find the reason for her "luck".
so……
Anyway, she has left, and what happens to the Jiang family afterwards has nothing to do with her. From then on, all the grudges are settled.
She didn't think about whether she was soft-hearted or cruel. She just did what she wanted to do, that was all.
The girl lay on her side on the couch, her black hair flowing, and her light golden dress blooming like a bunch of flowers.
His eyes fell on the wall in front of him, and as he carefully observed the patterns on it, the corners of Jiang Jingyuan's mouth suddenly turned down.
actually……
She was naive to begin with.
Interests and emotions have always been complementary. If one of them is lost, the other will collapse like a tall building.
She herself has lost her value, so how can she ask others to continue to invest their attention in her?
She had been praised too highly in the past, almost to the point of overlooking the world from the clouds, so she didn't know the rules and principles of the world...
It's okay.
It's okay, she is learning it little by little.
The girl was almost curled up on the small couch. She raised her hand and gently patted her shoulder as if to comfort her.
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