Volume 1 Chapter 142 He just wanted to be closer to her
New Year’s Eve is the day for family reunion.
In the hillside villa, the Xu family's house also has a warm and harmonious atmosphere.
In the kitchen, the chefs are busy preparing the New Year's Eve dinner.
Wen Jiahuan and Yan Shuyun sat around the dining table, chatting affectionately about family matters while wrapping dumplings with skill.
Xu Hongjian and Xu Xingqi played chess leisurely in front of the chessboard in the living room, and chatted about the company's performance this year.
Xu Siyan sat on the sofa and played King of Glory with his friends, and from time to time he excitedly said, "Save me! Save me! Save me!"
Xu Xingzhi sat next to him, watching the boring Spring Festival Gala idly.
Time passed slowly. Xu Xingzhi couldn't stand the boring Spring Festival Gala anymore, so he stood up and took the elevator straight to the fourth floor.
The fourth floor is the private space for Xu Daiyue, Xu Jingmo and Xu Siyan.
Xu Daiyue is married and not here. Xu Siyan is downstairs, addicted to games.
He didn't know why, but he just wanted to come to the fourth floor to take a look.
Xu Jingmo's bedroom door was not completely closed. Through a tiny gap, he saw Xu Jingmo sitting at the desk, his chin resting on one hand, casually flipping through an exercise book.
He knocked on the door, and Xu Jingmo answered without raising his head, "Come in."
Xu Xingzhi pushed the door open and reminded, "It's almost time for dinner."
"Got it." Xu Jingmo responded casually, his eyes still fixed on the exercises.
Xu Xingzhi added: "It's the New Year, you can relax yourself, and study for one more day."
Xu Jingmo said nonchalantly, "There's nothing else to do anyway."
Xu Xingzhi suggested: "We can play chess."
Xu Jingmo replied indifferently: "You can't beat me, it's a waste of time."
Xu Xingzhi: “…”
Xu Jingmo immediately continued, "If you have nothing else to say, please don't bother me. It will affect my thinking. I will be downstairs in a moment."
Xu Xingzhi did not leave. He looked at Xu Jingmo who was concentrating on solving the problem in front of him. He had not even glanced at him since Xu Jingmo entered the room.
Xu Jingmo's current state completely fits the ideal "son image" in his mind. He no longer speaks to him in a sarcastic manner, no longer confronts him, and most of the time he can even answer his questions calmly and patiently.
There had never been such harmony between them.
During the end-of-year vacation, he returned to North City and when he met with old friends, the topic always revolved around career and family.
Whenever he talks about his family, someone will always tell him, "Your son Mo is amazing. My children told me that he seems to have won several national awards. He is so awesome. You really know how to educate him. Mo was so naughty when he was little. Look at him now. He is so outstanding. The young are really formidable. His future is limitless. If my son is half as good as your Mo, I will be so lucky."
Every time he heard these praises, Xu Xingzhi would feel an indescribable bitterness in his heart.
The outstanding Xu Jingmo today...was not brought up by him...
When he was a child, he listened to others praising Xu Hongjian and Xu Xingqi. The smile on Xu Hongjian's face was always so bright and proud.
He also longed to be the one being praised.
But later he realized that he would never be the son that Xu Hong would be proud of.
The birth of Xu Jingmo changed Xu Hongjian's attitude towards him, and Xu Hongjian's love for this grandson was beyond words.
But Xu Jingmo was too naughty, a real devil who made Wen Jiahuan cry almost every day.
He was afraid that Xu Hongjian would be disappointed in Xu Jingmo. In his life, he wanted to get Xu Hongjian's recognition once, even if it was recognition for his son.
He was very strict with Xu Jingmo, and since Wen Jiahuan couldn't control Xu Jingmo, he took care of him himself. He remembered the pain of being beaten when he was a child, so he thought Xu Jingmo would become obedient after being beaten.
Unexpectedly, Xu Jingmo is full of rebelliousness.
The relationship between father and son became so tense that he didn't even know who he was competing with, Xu Hongjian, Xu Jingmo, or himself. Why couldn't he get recognition just once...
Now, he is also reflecting on himself. After living for more than 40 years, what has he achieved?
It seems that he has nothing except money and status in the eyes of outsiders.
Xu Xingzhi asked softly: "A-Mo, do you hate your father?"
Xu Jingmo was obviously stunned. He obviously did not expect Xu Xingzhi to ask such a question.
He tilted his head to look at Xu Xingzhi and answered without hesitation: "No hatred."
Xu Xingzhi asked, "Is it true?"
Xu Jingmo's fingers twirled the pen nimbly, and he looked down at the half-solved math problem and said nonchalantly, "Well, the grace of giving birth to and raising you is greater than heaven. You are my father, so I can't say I hate you."
The reason why he had no worries about food and clothing, his status and position, and the fact that he could meet Du Ruo were all because he was his son and he did not abandon him, so there was no question of whether he hated him or not.
Xu Xingzhi didn't have time to say anything.
Xu Jingmo then said, "Not hating someone doesn't mean liking someone. Don't apologize to me, you may not get the answer you want. I am living a fulfilling and happy life now, and I don't care whether you are responsible or happy now. Don't hold me hostage with morality. Leave the guilt to those who need you to feel guilty, and everyone should just live your own lives."
Xu Xingzhi explained: "I have been reflecting on myself recently..."
Xu Jingmo interrupted him and said calmly, "If you think saying it's okay can make you feel better, I can also tell you it's okay."
"But you still have no right to interfere in my life. You must admit that your current social experience is no longer enough to educate me. I won't listen to you. I will always move forward and will not look back."
Xu Xingzhi admitted with a wry smile: "I didn't mean to teach you anything. You are indeed very good now."
Xu Jingmo's train of thought was completely interrupted, and he had no intention of continuing to work on the math problems, so he simply stood up and walked downstairs.
When he passed by Xu Xingzhi, he stopped and said softly, "It is better to be self-satisfied than to be self-reflective. Dad, you don't need to feel guilty about me. I won't be the one to spend your long life with you. Don't worry about my opinion."
Human energy is limited, and it is impossible to be perfect and satisfied in everything. I don't know what I want, I want everything, but I can't get anything, and I'm not willing to pay for my actions. In the final analysis, I haven't really let myself go.
Xu Jingmo ignored him and went straight downstairs. He was too lazy to focus his energy on Xu Xingzhi.
Xu Xingzhi looked at his back and suddenly realized that Xu Jingmo had really grown to an excellent level now... although he was only 18 years old... the young were formidable, and he was indeed not as good as him.
Before the New Year's Eve dinner, Xu Hongjin distributed New Year's red envelopes to everyone. Everyone, from the oldest to the youngest, took turns to express blessings and thanks.
When it was Xu Jingmo's turn, he gave Xu Jingmo two red envelopes.
Xu Jingmo was slightly stunned, with a puzzled look in his eyes.
Xu Hongjian explained: "Save it for Du Ruo, for the joy of the New Year."
Xu Jingmo accepted it calmly.
Xu Xingqi asked with concern: "Has there been no news yet?"
Xu Xingzhi responded, "Well, Du Qian and the others can't see it."
Wen Jiahuan's eyes suddenly turned red, and she sighed distressedly, "Alas... Ruobao's 18th birthday is tomorrow... and there's no one to celebrate with her..."
There was a moment of dead silence at the dinner table. Mr. and Mrs. Xu Hongzhen and Xu Xingqi didn't know that Du Ruo's birthday was on the first day of the Lunar New Year. Was it just one day later than Xu Jingmo's?
Xu Xingzhi coughed lightly, trying to remind her not to behave so out of control on New Year's Eve.
Xu Siyan secretly glanced at Xu Jingmo and saw that he was staring at the two red envelopes in his hands with an unclear emotion in his eyes.
Perhaps recalling the scene on Xu Daiyue's 18th birthday, Xu Xingqi couldn't help but sigh from the bottom of his heart: "Each generation has talented people, and our generation is still young..."
He stood up and left the table. Not long after, he came back and handed Xu Jingmo a thick red envelope and said, "This is a gift from my uncle. Keep it for Du Ruo."
Xu Jingmo also calmly accepted this kindness on behalf of Du Ruo.
Seeing this, Yan Shuyun also stood up and prepared another red envelope.
In the end, all the red envelopes Xu Jingmo received from the elders were double, and thicker than in previous years.
He stared at the thick stack of red envelopes in his hand and smiled bitterly.
This is the most cheesy blessing their family can give.
After the New Year’s Eve dinner, it’s time to stay up all night.
The whole family sat in the living room and watched the Spring Festival Gala together.
At around 11pm, Xu Jingmo couldn't help but stand up and said, "I'm going out for a while."
Xu Xing consciously wanted to stop him, but when the words came to his lips, he swallowed them back and turned to look at Xu Hongjian.
Xu Hongjin was silent for a few seconds, then said, "Be careful."
"Yeah." Xu Jingmo responded softly, turned around and left.
Everyone knew where he wanted to go, but they couldn't help but wonder what the point would be if he went there, since her family wouldn't be able to see her.
However, now there is no one to stop him...
Xu Jingmo deliberately drove a car with license plate 88888, not for any other reason but to facilitate driving privileges.
As the midnight bell approaches, the streets are unusually empty at night, and most people are at home enjoying the warmth of reunion.
Xu Jingmo drove quickly and soon arrived at the headquarters of the institute.
After reporting his identity and obtaining permission, he parked his car across the street and stared quietly at the brightly lit building.
On this night when almost all companies are immersed in holidays, the institute building is still brightly lit, with countless people inside doing unknown work.
Xu Jingmo didn't know which floor or laboratory Du Ruo was busy in.
He didn't care whether she knew he was coming or not.
He just wanted to be closer to her.
As close as possible.
Xu Jingmo looked at the time. At 23:59, he got out of the car holding a fairy stick firework. As the clock struck 0:00, he lit the fairy stick in the direction of the institute building and said softly, "Happy birthday, Ruobao."
The fireworks burned in my hands, and the tiny sparks of light gradually turned into ashes.
He murmured again, "Happy New Year."
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