Volume 1 Chapter 109 Unconditional Love
Xu Xingzhi drank the whole bottle of wine by himself like a buffalo. Du Qian went to his wine cabinet and picked out a bottle of good wine. After opening it, he filled the two people's glasses.
He sighed, "There's a theory in psychology called Festinger's Principle. It says that 10% of life is made up of what happens to you, and the other 90% is determined by how you react to what happens."
“When life is a mess, instead of blaming others, it is better to reflect on yourself. We cannot control the 10% that has happened, but we can decide the remaining 90% by ourselves.”
"We are all men, so we all know each other. Hugging is easy, kissing is easy, and buying gifts is easy. The most difficult thing is how to always be patient with the people you are close to and to restrain your negative emotions."
"You are such a shy person. You can't bring yourself to do that, but you always like to say hurtful things. You expect the other person to see through all your metaphors and love you unconditionally. What about you? What have you given that others should love you unconditionally like a dog."
Xu Xingzhi's inner shame was exposed, and he sneered with disdain, mocking: "You understand now, what? Come and teach me?"
Du Qian glanced at him, took a sip of wine, and snorted coldly: "The stupidest thing for adults to do is to keep lecturing others about reason and arguing about right and wrong. You have been courting death for so many years, and have I ever paid attention to you?"
"So what are you doing now?"
Du Qian: "Who told you that you are my future in-law? For the sake of our future relationship, I will give you some advice. I don't want you to become a lonely person and live a miserable life in your later years."
Xu Xingzhi kept silent, laughing at himself in his heart, wondering how he was any different from a lonely man now.
He silently filled his glass and clinked glasses with Du Qian. After a long silence, he murmured, "Why can't you love me unconditionally?"
His biological mother gave birth to him only to use him as a tool to save money, and his biological father was wary of him, fearing that he would fight for things that did not belong to him.
The only person in the world who loved him unconditionally was probably that kind woman...
She treated him as her own son, but he was so ignorant that he made her angry. God punished him and made him unable to see her for the last time...
He thought no one would love him in his life, but Wen Jiahuan appeared again.
He couldn't run away no matter how he scolded her or how violent he was. She was like an indestructible cockroach and loved him without any dignity.
He asked her, "What's so good about me? Why do you have to love me?"
She said, "You are not good in any way, but you are just right for me. I don't know why I must have you, but I just like you. Life is all about having fun. Liking you makes me happy. Of course, if you like me too, I will be doubly happy."
He was not a stone that could not be warmed up; she was really like a little sun that had melted him long ago.
They fell in love, got married, had children, and everything seemed happy.
I just don't know when... in the midst of trivialities, it slowly became the current state...
She no longer loves him unconditionally...
Du Qian looked at his friend's slightly broken eyes, sighed, and said softly: "Yes, there are people in the world who will love you unconditionally."
Xu Xingzhi turned his head to look at him, and followed his gaze to the four children playing Frisbee in the garden downstairs.
Xu Jingmo threw the frisbee with a smile. Xu Siyan jumped up and caught it, then waved his hands proudly.
Du Qian: "Adult love begins with affection and ends with responsibility. It may be for money, sex, or fun. If you think about it carefully, all affections have traces. If there is any pure love in the world, it is only the love of children for their parents."
"He came with nothing, and he doesn't care whether we are rich or poor. He doesn't interfere with our work, doesn't force us to eat certain foods, doesn't set a schedule for us, and doesn't criticize or threaten us if we have conflicts with others. He also doesn't force us to become someone else's parents. He doesn't make any demands on us."
"Their love for us is instinctive and they never hesitate to give us anything, whether we need it or not."
"We, in an adult way, added weight to this unconditional love, until one day it became so stressful that he couldn't breathe or stand up straight. He resisted with all his might and shouted, 'I don't want to be someone like you when I grow up.'"
Du Qian laughed at himself bitterly, "When I was little, I said that I would never become a person like my father when I grew up. However, I unknowingly became the type of person I hate the most."
He turned his head to look at Xu Xingzhi and asked, "What about you? Jing Mo and Si Yan, why don't you get close to you? Are you really not aware of it? And whose shadow is hidden in you now? Are you really not aware of it?"
Du Ruo looked up in the direction of the Xu family villa. It was getting dark quickly and she could only vaguely see two figures in front of the window, but she couldn't make out their expressions clearly.
I was wondering in my heart, after so long, the negotiations wouldn't break down and a fight would break out, right? Was Grandpa's method effective?
While she was distracted for a moment, a frisbee flew towards her. Xu Jingmo quickly ran over and blocked it with his back, and asked softly, "What are you thinking about?"
Du Ruo looked at the culprit with cold eyes, picked up the frisbee, and threw it in a beautiful arc, hitting Du Yao right between the eyebrows.
Du Yao covered his forehead and cried out in pain.
Du Ruo snorted complacently, "You are trying to sneak attack me. You are overestimating yourself."
Xu Jingmo chuckled at the side, "My girlfriend is so amazing~"
Du Ruo smiled and praised him, "My boyfriend is quite skilled. He ran over so far to protect me."
Xu Jingmo raised his eyebrows and boasted, "Okay, okay, I'll just do my duty as a boyfriend."
Du Ruo looked at him and couldn't help laughing.
Xu Jingmo lowered his eyes and looked at her, and said softly: "I don't want to play with the child anymore."
"Huh?" Du Ruo was puzzled.
Xu Jingmo: "I've been coaxing you for a whole day, it's time for you to coax me."
Du Ruo's eyes inexplicably fell on his pale, thin lips. She moved away and whispered, "I'll leave the door open for you tonight."
Xu Jingmo touched his nose calmly and said with a smile: "It sounds quite exciting."
Du Ruo glared at him and said, "Then go home tonight."
"No, if you don't leave the door open I'll climb in through the window."
"...Psycho." Du Ruo cursed with a smile.
Xu Jingmo responded shamelessly, "How do you know I sneaked out of the hospital without being discharged? Doctor Du, will you treat me tonight?"
Du Ruo couldn't help but hit him, and Xu Jingmo dodged and laughed.
Du Yao looked at Xu Jingmo who was being beaten and felt relieved because he was not the only one being beaten.
Du Qian looked at the quarreling figures downstairs and couldn't help curling his lips and whispering, "We don't have their courage and can't get rid of the intergenerational transmission. But they dare to break the vicious cycle."
Xu Xingzhi looked downstairs without saying a word.
ps: (Intergenerational transmission effect: refers to the phenomenon that some characteristics of parents continue to be passed on to their children. The more similar the children are to their parents in all aspects, the stronger the intergenerational transmission effect is, and vice versa. There are both negative and positive transmissions. When an individual has experienced severe trauma and is unable to repair it, the trauma may be passed on to the next generation, or even the next generation, like a 'gene', forming a "compulsive repetition")
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