Chapter 51 Spend Time Together
The late autumn wind blew the golden-like sycamore leaves across the glass curtain wall of the psychological counseling center. Tang Ximian stood at the door of the hypnosis room, and the cold sweat on his palms soaked his cuffs.
Si Yankai's suit jacket was draped over his shoulders, still retaining his body temperature and mixed with the scent of cedar.
"Are you scared?" Si Yankai's fingertips brushed the tip of his red ear, "How about we wait a little longer?
Tang Ximian looked up and met the fragmented light in those amber pupils.
He shook his head and pressed his palm deeper into Si Yankai's palm lines: "It's time for a conclusion. I can't be stuck in the past. Making those who love me worry and fear for so many years is enough."
Tang Ximian let go of his hand and walked forward, but after taking two steps, she suddenly turned around and fell into Si Yankai's arms.
He smelled a faint scent of cedar on Si Yankai, mixed with a hint of hospital disinfectant.
"Don't make it like a life-and-death separation." Si Yankai patted his back with a smile, but his voice was hoarse.
"Wait until I come out," Tang Ximian buried her face in Si Yankai's shoulder, "I want to eat the tomato beef brisket noodles you cooked, with double the amount of cilantro."
When he pushed open the door of the clinic, Tang Ximian didn't look back. He was afraid to meet Si Yankai's eyes; the worry in them would destroy the courage he had worked so hard to build up.
Hypnotist Dr. Lin's office is unexpectedly warm and cozy.
In the corner stands a pot of lush green ivy, with vines hanging down and swaying gently in the air from the air conditioner.
Tang Ximian lay on the professional equipment that looked like a massage chair, with monitoring electrodes on her wrists and temples.
"We've discussed before that memory recovery can be painful." Dr. Lin adjusted the device's parameters. "Anytime you want to stop, just raise your right hand."
Tang Ximian stared at the starry sky projection on the ceiling and remembered what Si Yankai had said to him last night when he hugged him on the balcony: "No matter what you see, remember that you have me now."
As the drug began to take effect, Tang Ximian felt as if his consciousness was being immersed in warm honey. Doctor Lin's voice came from a distance: "What did you see..."
"The accident scene... blood, so much blood. Why? Why didn't you save me?"
"It's you, you did it on purpose..."
When Dr. Lin guided him back to reality, Tang Ximian found that his teeth were sore from clenching their teeth and his nails were deeply embedded in his palms.
The monitoring device emitted regular beeps, indicating that his heart rate had stabilized.
"Excellent performance." Dr. Lin handed over a glass of warm water. "It's rare for a patient to be able to fully recall a traumatic memory the first time."
As dusk crept in through the gaps in the blinds, Si Yankai heard the slight sound of the doorknob turning. He almost jumped up and rushed to Tang Ximian in two steps.
He carefully observed his lover's expression, and the expected collapse or tears did not appear. Tang Ximian even smiled at him.
"Xiao Mian?" Si Yankai's thumb brushed across the corner of his eye, where tears were still wet. "Are you okay? Are you feeling uncomfortable anywhere?"
"It's okay. I remember now. I remember everything. There was a traitor among those people back then."
Tang Ximian grabbed his wrist and pressed his palm against his chest, "This place is filled with hatred that makes their lives worse than death."
"Mianmian..." Si Yankai's eyes were full of heartache. He just opened his mouth when he was interrupted by Tang Ximian.
"Si Yankai, remember what you promised me?" Tang Ximian looked straight into his eyes. "No matter what I want to do, you will accompany me."
"Of course I remember." Si Yankai tightened his fingers, "What do you need me to do?"
Tang Ximian retrieved another file from his phone, which was the result of a secret investigation that Tang Li had conducted with his friends.
"These are the people who were present at the accident. After eliminating them, one of the remaining three is an undercover agent, and they are in my brother's company. I need you to help me find out who betrayed my brother."
Si Yankai stared at his lover's profile and suddenly realized that Tang Ximian's calmness was not a pretense - he had truly tempered his pain into a blade. This transformation made him both distressed and vaguely uneasy.
"I see. I'll arrange for someone to check it out right away. Let's go home first, okay?"
Si Yankai stood up, took Tang Ximian's hand and walked out.
"We agreed on tomato and beef brisket noodles. I'll cook it for you when I get home, and give you double the beef brisket."
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