Chapter 191 Emotional Outburst
"I was too cowardly before."
He gave a bitter smile, a smile more painful than tears. "I know perfectly well that you are someone I can't give myself to, yet my heart has long been out of control. I'm afraid that if I'm with you, my mother will faint on the spot, crying and saying I'm unfilial, saying I've let down our ancestors; I'm afraid that my father will beat me with a stick in his rage, cut off my financial support, and even sever our ties; I'm also afraid of those people outside, gossiping and saying that the Shen family has produced a pair of unruly uncle and nephew who have ruined the family's century-old reputation. So I chose to hide, I chose to escape, I chose to push you away with my own hands."
"I know perfectly well that you have feelings for me too, even if it's just the slightest hint, even if it's just a fleeting glance, I can feel it. But I still pretend not to see it, pretend that you're just an immature child and I'm just a respectful elder. I dare not respond, nor dare I get close, for fear that one wrong step will lead to utter ruin."
"In fact... to make you give up completely, I agreed to a marriage alliance with the Qiao family."
He paused, his voice so hoarse he could barely utter a complete sentence, "I used that marriage contract to push you away with my own hands. I watched you hastily get engaged a month before my wedding, watched you stand side by side with Sheng Tingzhou, a forced smile on your face, and it felt like a piece of my heart had been ripped out. But I still didn't stop you, because I thought... that was the best protection for you."
"I hurt you and destroyed the last possibility between us."
"Yes or no……
So that's why you're completely disappointed in me? That's why you married someone else without hesitation, that's why you smile at me so distantly, so politely, as if you've never had a single genuine feeling for me?
Song Zhiwei bit her lip so hard that it turned white and almost bled.
Her vision blurred for a moment, and tears welled up in her eyes, but she held them back with all her might.
These words, spoken to her face, were like a sharp dagger, piercing straight into her most hidden wound.
Her face burned, as if someone had peeled off a layer of skin in public. Shame, grievance, shock, and heartache were all mixed together, and she couldn't tell which one hurt the most.
It turns out that all those thoughts she secretly kept hidden, those names she repeatedly sketched while tossing and turning at night, those details she deliberately avoided—his birthday, his social media updates, everything that might bring him into her life…
He knows everything.
He saw it all, and it pained him deeply, but he never said a word about it.
She thought she had acted well enough, not daring to show even the slightest hint of attraction in order not to disturb his life or throw his world into chaos.
She told herself that this was how to love someone—to let them go, and then to leave.
But now he says—he likes her too?
It started a long, long time ago, and I endured the same torment, the same forbearance, and the same helplessness as her.
It's both heartbreaking and absurd.
She took a deep breath, her chest heaving violently, as if trying to suppress all her surging emotions.
She raised her eyes, forcing a smile, her lips stiff but her eyes stubborn: "Uncle, I've thought it through. My feelings for you are just liking, nothing more. A youthful flutter shouldn't become a lifelong obsession. People grow up and learn to let go."
"After meeting Sheng Tingzhou, I truly understood that liking and loving are not the same thing at all. Liking is when your heart races, when you feel happy just seeing the other person; but loving is being willing to bow down for the other person, willing to sacrifice yourself, willing to hold each other tightly in the storm, not asking right or wrong, only asking if you can walk together. You and I... never reached the point of 'love'. We were trapped by our identities, trapped by ethics, trapped by reality. Even if you say these words today, I... can't go back."
Zhou Yuze's lips curled into a sarcastic smile. "You're still young and can't distinguish between feelings. Where does this deep love come from? It's just the initial excitement of being together. Before long, you'll realize that this kind of liking won't last long."
Song Zhiwei gently shook her head, her eyes resolute. "No. I know what I'm saying, and I know my own heart. I want to spend my whole life with him, I want to have a tomorrow with him. It's not an impulsive decision, but a decision made after careful consideration."
Her voice lowered, tinged with weariness and reluctance: "Uncle, let bygones be bygones. I can't change what happened, and I don't want to dwell on it anymore. Don't keep it in your heart, just focus on getting better and taking care of yourself... I'm leaving."
"Zhiwei".
He suddenly spoke, his voice so hoarse it was almost unlike the cool and restrained Zhou Yuze of the past, "If... I could get rid of everything I have now, cast aside my identity, responsibilities, and constraints, and start over—would you be willing to come to America with me?"
His gaze was intense and stubborn, like a drowning person grasping at the last straw.
"No one knows us there, no one will point fingers, no one will bother us. We can live anonymously in a small house by the sea, watching the sunrise and sunset every day, living a quiet life... How about that?"
"Uncle!"
She abruptly interrupted him, her voice filled with shock and resistance, her face turning pale instantly. "I don't recognize you anymore. I wish we could still be like before, you were my uncle, and I was Wanwan, whom you loved and protected. I won't remember a single word you said today. Please... don't say such things again. I'm leaving now."
Before she finished speaking, she had already turned around and rushed out, as if some terrible nightmare was chasing after her.
Zhou Yuze stood there, staring intently at the door that had been slammed shut, his eyes bloodshot, like ashes from the burning of all his emotions.
He had humbled himself to such an extent, setting aside his pride, tearing away his disguise, and even uttering such a lowly plea—yet she still refused to turn back.
She really has changed.
She is no longer the little girl who looked up to him, depended on him, and only knew how to act coquettishly in his arms.
At the end of the corridor, Sheng Tingzhou leaned against the wall, waiting quietly for her.
The morning light streamed through the glass, falling on his shoulders and outlining his tall, straight figure.
As soon as Song Zhiwei saw him, she almost stumbled and threw herself into his arms, nuzzling her nose against his warm chest and taking a deep breath.
That was Sheng Tingzhou's scent—calm, clear, and with a faint cedar fragrance, like a bonfire in winter, gradually soothing the chaotic fear and unease in her heart.
Sheng Tingzhou didn't ask any further questions. He simply raised his hand gently, his palm softly covering her hair, stroking it gently, his voice low and soft: "What's wrong? Did you quarrel with your uncle?"
She shook her head, her eyelashes trembling slightly. "It wasn't an argument... it's just that we're too unfamiliar with each other."
How could my uncle, who used to be aloof and reserved, and always kept his distance, suddenly say such things today?
Such pleas, such emotional breakdowns, such...delusions.
She simply couldn't believe it, nor did she want to believe it.
What did he say to you?
She looked up, a thin layer of mist in her eyes, and asked him softly.
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