Ever since receiving Yuyang's letter, Xu Wen had longed to visit Empress Jing'an in the palace, but she remained locked up, refusing to see anyone. She sent letters several times, each to no avail, leaving Xu Wen feeling deeply troubled. Empress Jing'an, such a kind soul, had been deeply wounded by the filth of the palace, but it wasn't the right thing for the mother of a nation to retreat to a remote location. The concubines in the harem watched Empress Jing'an with eager eyes, each one eager to take a bite out of her flesh.
Qiu Ling rubbed Xu Wen's head. Hearing her sighs, she knew the young lady was worried about Queen Jing'an again. After a moment's thought, Qiu Ling said, "Don't worry, young lady. There's a Mid-Autumn Festival banquet in a month. Find a chance to knock on Queen Jing'an's door. She'll definitely be willing to see you."
Xu Wen finally opened her eyes. If Qiu Ling hadn't reminded her, she would have been so anxious that she would have lost her mind. If she had entered the palace at other times, she wouldn't have been able to move around freely. Gong Yan could have used the excuse of taking the wrong road to cover it up.
Xu Wen patted Qiu Ling's hand and said with a smile, "Qiu Ling, thanks to you, I forgot for a moment." Seeing Qiu Ling's embarrassed face, she remembered something: "Qiu Ling, you are twenty-two this year. A few years ago, you said it was too early, but this year you can't delay any longer. Women have to get married, so why not come back after giving birth to the baby?"
Qiu Ling fell to her knees with a plop, tears welling up in her eyes. She said in a hoarse voice, "My lady, I have grown up with you and I don't want to leave your side. Look at those men. Not to mention the rich and powerful who have a slew of women in their backyards, even the common people, as long as they have an extra ounce of silver, they will immediately want to take a concubine. I believe I cannot share a husband with anyone, so I will serve you for the rest of my life. I beg for your permission."
Xu Wen gently patted Qiu Ling's back and said through sobs, "It's all my fault. We used to talk about being together forever, but I ended up leading you astray. Isn't this how all couples live? I've been through it and have long forgotten the past, but you remember it. Qiu Ling, think about it again. You should have a child to keep by your side."
Qiu Ling wiped the tears from her face and said with a firm look, "My lady, I will be by your side to take care of my son. If you have another son in the future, I can also take care of him. I will protect you and your child. Please don't chase me away."
Xu Wen took out a handkerchief to wipe Qiu Ling's tears. Without responding to Qiu Ling's words, he helped Qiu Ling up, took Qiu Ling's hand and said, "You are my only brother. If you are really determined, I will support you in the future. But I can't agree to your request now. Think about it again. I will ask you again before the New Year." Qiu Ling nodded gratefully and smiled through her tears.
Qiu Ling was Xu Wen's maid, having grown up with her. Her family lived in Nanjing. Xu Wen wanted to let Qiu Ling return to Nanjing to visit her family, but since she had moved to the capital, Nanjing had only reappeared in her dreams.
In the past few days, Xu Wen often took out the jade pendant given by her mother to play with it, and occasionally took out pen and ink to face the blank letter paper but did not put pen to paper.
Back then, she was so determined to get married, which broke her father and mother's heart. Before getting married, she even said that she would sever all ties with them. Now, Sheng Huairen's actions have proven that his father and mother had said so.
She knew she had made the wrong choice, but she didn't dare contact her family. If she were living a happy life, she could go back and show off, but now, she knew she had made the wrong choice, choosing a heartless man.
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