Chapter 43 Leave. Be well, I'll come pick you up and take you home.
Li Yunru's eyes were slightly lowered, darting around in places that were not easily seen.
She couldn't tell how much of Yan Ning's statement was true and how much was false.
She also wanted to believe that the person was genuinely concerned for her, but at this particular time, she couldn't let her guard down and trust them completely.
Yan Ning was hurt by her hesitant attitude, but he couldn't say anything. Everything that happened today was the result of his previous dishonesty and indecisiveness.
He placed his hands on her shoulders, lowered his head slightly, and pressed his forehead against hers.
Li Yunru was stunned by his intimate gesture in front of everyone, and stared at him with wide eyes.
"Yan Changjun".
The man's dark raven feathers fluttered, and he looked utterly exhausted. "Liyang, I know you don't believe me, and that's understandable. I don't blame you. It's my fault; I haven't fulfilled my responsibilities as a husband, which is why you're so wary of me. I'm so sorry, but..."
He changed the subject, making a somewhat humble plea: "Please trust me one more time, just the last time."
A warmth rose on her forehead. They were so close, surrounded by the delicate scent of pine and bamboo. For a moment, it seemed as if they were the only two people in the world.
Let's believe one more time?
I'll believe it one more time.
Li Yunru's inner voice told her this, and in the end, she agreed.
"Um."
Since we already received the seal, let's consider this a way of repaying the favor.
-
She agreed, and there wasn't much to say about it; they simply left the city before the sun rose higher.
Yan Ning followed along to deliver the goods, and only stopped helplessly when the entire city of Jiankang was far behind them and could no longer be seen.
He instructed again: "Be careful when you're out and about. If you run into trouble, don't confront people directly. Take the seal I gave you and go to the government office for help."
He added, "Liyang, I don't ask much of you. I just ask that you take good care of yourself and wait for me to come find you and take you home."
Yan Ning earnestly instructed his wife, who was going on her first long journey. She was impulsive, loved excitement, and had a chivalrous heart. However, there were more ghosts than people in this world, and no one knew what might happen on this trip. In the past, when she was in Jiankang, there were many troubles, but at least he could help deal with some of them. Once she left Jiankang, no matter how many hands he had, there would always be places he couldn't take care of.
However, he was overthinking it.
Li Yunru grew up in the countryside, especially during the years when Emperor Qi Xuan and the current Emperor Shangwu jointly launched a rebellion. This caused many problems, including not only food and clothing shortages, but also frequent pursuit by the government. Neighbors could not distinguish between humans and ghosts, and a careless word could cost one's life.
If she were completely lacking in discernment and intelligence, she wouldn't be alive today. She understands these things better than anyone else.
But hearing his tender words of advice still touched me slightly.
The person nodded softly, "Yes, I know."
She glanced at Yan Sheng and said, "Don't worry, I will take good care of myself and I will take good care of A Sheng."
Yan Sheng poked half his head out of the carriage, grinned at Yan Ning, and said, "Brother, don't worry, I will take good care of my sister-in-law. I will remind her to eat three meals a day and go to bed on time. I guarantee that when you see her again, she will be stronger than an ox."
Li Yunru: "..."
There's no need for that.
The wind howled, and the departing were reluctant to leave. In the very end, Yan Ning instructed everyone to protect her and Yan Sheng, and then broke off a slender bamboo branch to give as a gift. She watched them leave, and only after the carriage had gone far away and the dust had settled did she finally relax a little and close her eyes weakly.
He didn't want to.
If he could, he would never let go so easily. After all, no matter how well prepared everything is, it is still not as reassuring as having someone by his side, someone he can see and touch, someone he can watch over at all times.
But he couldn't help it. She refused to stay, nor did she want him by her side. She was so resistant to him, and he grew thinner and thinner every day because of it...
He didn't want to see a princess like that.
"Liyang, I hope that when we meet again, you will have moved on from the shadows."
...
Returning to the city via the ten-mile corridor, Yan Ning recalled Song Ji's words and said to Chen Jingsheng, "Go and investigate who has been in contact with the princess during the period from Shangjing to Jiankang after Emperor Xuan left, what they said, and what they did!"
"yes."
Yan Ning had her doubts about this matter.
On that day, Liyang had clearly agreed to let him stay, but then suddenly left a letter of divorce and left without saying goodbye, going to live in a mountain temple. There must be another hidden reason behind this.
However, it was his mother, who raised him, who gave him the divorce papers.
She said that Liyang couldn't get over Emperor Xuan's influence and didn't want to have any more ties with powerful families, so she left a letter and departed.
He didn't believe it and wanted to find her to get to the bottom of things. He tried every means to find her, regardless of the difficult mountain road. After the frost of the night passed, he saw her embracing Songji intimately. She was holding him and crying with tears streaming down her face. It was a relaxed and delicate appearance that he had never seen before.
In that instant, he felt dizzy. Although they were married, her bold yet awkward actions on their wedding night, as well as the red stain beneath her body, told him that Liyang was spoiled and willful, but had not transgressed any rules with anyone before marriage.
What Empress Zhenyuan said was true.
But he still couldn't help thinking about the rumors circulating in the capital.
Half a year.
From the time the two parties reached an agreement, it took him more than half a year to travel from Jiankang to the capital and for the two to get married.
While in the capital, he listened every day to the stories of the little princess and the musician being sung in the teahouses and theaters.
They were said to have a history of infidelity, spending their days together like lovers, inseparable. Yan Sanlang, however, was already wearing a green hat before even getting married.
These events became clearer in my mind once again.
He has lost his mind!
My only remaining reason prevented me from going in. I confronted her openly and started arguing, but I lost the ability to think clearly.
He believed his mother.
They thought she couldn't get past Emperor Xuan, yet they also thought she wanted to be the only one for him in this life. These were all absurd and unorthodox statements that were incomprehensible to aristocratic families!
That's why it is so.
He tried his best to prove himself to her, openly and secretly competing with that musician, but she repeatedly turned him away...
He assumed she really didn't want him anymore, so he stopped trying to find out.
But unexpectedly, the source was actually wrong.
He focused his mind, clutching his chest, an indescribable feeling swirling within him, making it hard for him to breathe.
...
Her state of mind was different from Yan Ning's.
Once Li Yunru left Jiankang, she was like a bird that had broken free of its cage. She left the window half-open, letting the still-chilly wind blow in, and freely absorbed the fresh air from outside.
It's the taste of freedom.
Since her father passed away, she felt she hadn't smelled this scent in a long time.
She recalled the day she and Yan Ning saw her elder sister Li Jing off as she left the capital. Perhaps her sister felt the same way back then.
So many things have happened in the past six months, a dense and overwhelming mess that left her breathless. But today, all of this is finally beginning to see the light of day.
In fact, Li Yunru had never expected that Yan Ning would let go so easily. Judging from the scene of their argument that day, he was extremely stubborn. She thought he would do something with his power. She never expected that he would let go of his obsession so easily. It was really unexpected.
Thinking of how he combed her hair and did her makeup before she left this morning, Li Yunru felt a sweet warmth in her heart.
Yan Ning is like that; when she's willing, she's gentle to the core.
The two had been married for over a year. Although she had insisted on the outcome, he was a gentleman and wouldn't be too disrespectful to her. Even when she deliberately talked nonsense in front of those noble ladies in order to save face, he would cooperate with her.
Therefore, despite Cui Wan's childhood sweetheart relationship, the two were still considered a match made in heaven, a perfect couple, and a beautiful story in Jiankang.
well.
If this hadn't happened, over time, the two might have become a loving couple without any ulterior motives or resentment.
I shouldn't be thinking about these things!
Li Yunru frowned in annoyance. Why was she always so unaware, so easily misled by fleeting pleasures?
She tried to banish those inappropriate thoughts, stretched out half her head, braced herself against the window with both hands, leaned there, closed her eyes, and quietly felt the cool mountain breeze.
Unlike the other children in the Yan family who were usually quiet, Yan Sheng was a lively person. She chattered away the whole way, mostly listening to the others. It was rare for her to be quiet for a while. Seeing that Li Yunru seemed to be in a good mood, she was about to speak again, but Shu Yun stopped her.
She handed her a sip of tea and said, "Miss Yan, you must be thirsty after talking for so long. Why don't you try some of the tea I brewed?"
Her master had finally managed to smile, so she wouldn't allow anyone to disturb him, not even the prince consort's sister.
...
After the seventh day of the Lunar New Year, Yan Ning could rest a bit and had fewer social engagements. When she returned to the Yan residence, it was past noon. After everyone had eaten and chatted for a while, they went back to their own courtyards.
Only maids and servants were running around in the house. The mother was very strict in managing the household, and they were very disciplined. Although they were clearly busy and never stopped, they made very little noise.
Li Yunru once said, "Your house is strange. It's such a big house, but it's like a dead man's house. There's no charm at all."
He hadn't thought about it before, but now he could see that there was definitely some truth to it.
This is not something observed in the absence of pavilions and waterside terraces, or willows reflected on the embankment.
It's a strange feeling that arises from the heart!
It's clearly been recreated to look like a fairyland, but it just doesn't feel alive.
He gasped.
However, before he could fully exhale the chill, a maidservant from his mother Cui's side came over and summoned him.
"knew."
"Lead the way."
He didn't go back to Wutong Garden to change his clothes; he simply followed the maid into Cui's courtyard.
Perhaps a more accurate description would be a Buddhist hall.
Yan Ning couldn't quite remember when her mother started believing in these things; it seemed that ever since she could remember, her courtyard had become a Buddhist shrine.
While chanting Buddhist scriptures, she also engaged in worldly affairs, managing all sorts of mundane matters.
Extremely fragmented.
The parents' relationship was so-so, and they rarely set foot in this courtyard, except for the first and fifteenth of each lunar month, when they were mostly outside.
Apart from Consort Cui, who was related to his mother, and a mistress who never received a formal title until her death, he had no other concubines.
However, in recent years he has taken in another woman who lives in a rural village. She has not conceived or had any children, and his mother has not made a fuss. Everyone seems to accept that they are unaware of the situation, and they live their lives peacefully.
Yan Ning once thought that all couples in this world should be like this: respecting each other like guests, but not sharing their hearts. It wasn't until he went to the capital to see Emperor Xuan and Empress Zhenyuan that he realized that there are couples in this world who support each other through thick and thin, and are as close as one person.
Influenced by the two, Liyang also demanded that he be devoted to one person, never have a second thought, and only have her by his side.
This is an unorthodox demand.
Yan Ning initially found it somewhat absurd, but he was not a man of strong desires and did not have much interest in matters of love and sex, so he acquiesced to it.
Later, he wanted to give it a try...
It can be said that the Li family, whether in terms of parent-child relationships or relationships between husband, wife, brothers and sisters, gave him too many new experiences and shocks, as if reconstructing everything he had been raised and received for the past twenty years.
He couldn't say whether it was right or wrong, but he knew he longed for this kind of relationship.
Pure and simple!
-
Madam Cui was already waiting. As soon as Yan Ning entered, without even offering him tea, she went straight to the point and asked, "Ah Sheng, was it you who took her out?"
Yan Ning did not deny it.
"Yes, Mother."
Why?
“She’s my sister, and I don’t want to see her continue like this.”
"Not only that, what about the Li family?"
As Cui twirled the prayer beads in her hand, she felt somewhat gratified by the affection between the siblings, but even more disgusted that the child she had raised had deceived her for the sake of a young woman.
"Changjun, your mother is your closest person, you shouldn't lie to me."
Yan Ning's expression softened slightly, but he asked, "Then what about Mother? Haven't you ever lied to your son?"
Cui: "..."
“Mother, I’ve come to make things clear to you. I will not abandon Li Shi. She will always be my lawfully wedded wife. As for Asheng… I will not let her marry at such a young age. The man she marries must be of good character, a good match for her, and someone she likes and is willing to marry. If there is no such man, I can support her for the rest of her life!”
If he had any doubts in the past, after what happened in Liyang, he was completely certain of this!
His sister, unlike him, could not have her marriage used as a bargaining chip for family interests. At a young age, she went to another family, where she was subjected to strict rules and suffered endless torment.
The prayer beads in Cui's hand stopped spinning. She opened her eyes, turned to look at her son, and her gaze was complicated.
Yan Ning said, "I will accept the court's selection to serve as an official and take over the military power left by Emperor Xuan."
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