Chapter 28 Letter Those were their best seventeen years.
The air seemed to stop flowing.
Bo Xia was stunned: "You, you..."
She looked at Zhou Suiye, and even the most obtuse person could sense the meaning in his eyes: "You know?"
He didn't look at her, but tilted his head slightly: "What do you think?"
Liking someone is like coughing, it is very difficult to hide it.
Zhou Suiye had originally intended to tease her about this secret, but now he felt strangely uncomfortable. Although he often made irrelevant remarks back then, boasting and self-deprecating at times, the pride that only youth possessed was ingrained in him. While he often flattered his friends, he never looked down on himself or envied others.
But at a certain moment, he felt real jealousy towards Jin Yunyan for the first time.
Some people really don't have to do anything, they are born in Rome.
"Can you keep a secret for me?" She looked at him nervously, her beautiful eyes shining like a gem.
Zhou Suiye's tone seemed normal. He asked her what she liked about Jin Yunyan, and whether it was because she liked his lack of understanding of romance.
Talking about the person she likes, Bo Xia is quieter than usual. She says earnestly, "Liking him is like a less glaring beam of light shining into my damp, dark world..."
Like him to live the way she wants to be...
He admitted that he was jealous, but at that time he couldn't tell whether his jealousy was related to love or friendship. For a moment, he wanted to ask, what about him?
But he didn't say it in the end, just said, is this the reason?
If that's the reason, then that person could be him.
Bo Xia seemed to understand his hidden meaning and looked at him for a long time.
Do you need a reason to like someone? It seems like it does. When someone likes someone, there's always a trigger, whether it's a kind gesture or a smile.
But do you really need a reason to like someone? It seems not.
Mortals call the inexplicable part of love fate, or they can call it the superstition of the right time and place.
Just like what Zhang Ailing wrote——
“Among millions of people, you meet the person you are destined to meet. In millions of years, in the boundless wilderness of time, not a step earlier, not a step later, just by chance, there is nothing else to say, but to gently ask: Oh, you are here too.”[1]
Many things are often destined at the first meeting.
Bo Xia smiled gently. She couldn't explain it. The bus announcement sounded beside her ears. Seeing that they were about to get off, she hurriedly stuffed her pocket money into his pocket: "Thank you and Wen Xin for making me happy."
This old habit of being polite came back. Zhou Suiye was about to say something to her when he heard the girl stand up and whisper seriously, "Actually... you are also my special prize winners."
The bus came to an unsteady stop.
The car door opened and closed quickly, and the lights came on briefly and then went out. When Zhou Suiye looked back, he saw the thin figure running wildly in the night.
The girl who seems quiet in the eyes of others has her own unique vitality. She says her world is humid, but isn’t the moss, a so-called low-level organism that can grow in a humid corner, a miracle of life?
The street lights were broken, and Bo Xia ran wildly through the darkness until she reached the bottom of the corridor. Then she used the dim light to carefully examine the doll's ugly and cute face as if she were holding a precious treasure.
The diary entry for that day still begins with the word "today" and ends with:
"For a moment, I even felt like I owned the world."
The happiness of youth is always so simple, it can be because of a bag of delicious snacks or a little luck. Without the need for wind, her heart is like a surging sea, which can easily stir up waves even without any external influence.
After that day, Bo Xia focused more on her studies. She felt that pursuing him was a wonderful feeling, even though sometimes her unspeakable girlish thoughts were like a fishbone stuck in her throat.
Bo Xia enrolled Wen Xin in a cram school and took the opportunity to urge her to study, selecting supplementary teaching materials for her and helping her understand the key points.
There are a lot of exams of all sizes in high school. Wen Xin will slack off if he does a little bit poorly on an exam, and always makes excuses to rest when studying on weekends.
Just as she finished saying that the little turtle at home might miss her, she saw Bo Xia writing something down. She leaned over curiously and asked, "What are you writing down?"
"Remember Wen Xin's hundred excuses for avoiding studying."
Bo Xia smiled: "Or you can publish a book."
How could she be so mean that she was even teasing herself now? Wen Xin pretended to hit her hard, then resigned herself to her fate and opened the book to study, muttering that she was just talking.
Before we knew it, the spring of the southern eucalyptus trees began to revive, the camphor trees sprouted new buds, and even the wind blowing through the classroom corridors was full of vitality.
The monthly exam results had just come out, and Bo Xia came a little early. He took advantage of the break to lie down on the table and take a nap. As he fell into a daze, the classroom became increasingly noisy, and suddenly he heard whispers around him.
"Why did Wen Xin improve on her exams this time? Wasn't she always at the bottom of the class before?"
"Yeah, and I fell down during the last exam, but I climbed up again this time."
There was a slight laugh in the voices, and suddenly someone whispered, "I heard that there was a senior in the previous class who cheated on every exam and ranked in the top dozens in the school. In the end, he didn't get into undergraduate school, which shocked everyone."
"Maybe he is gifted."
"I think the giftedness is something else."
Bo Xia opened her eyes. She was angry because her friend was slandered. Her eyelashes trembled and her hands clenched involuntarily.
Zhou Suiye saw her expression as soon as he arrived. Before he could ask what happened, the usually introverted girl stood up, her back straight, and stood in front of a classmate and asked seriously: "Did you just say that Wen Xin cheated?"
The surroundings immediately became quiet.
Bo Xia was too quiet, so quiet that everyone just ignored her existence. They didn't expect that someone who was usually easy to talk to would dare to come and ask directly.
"No... I was just joking..."
She kept her eyes on them, and told herself to be brave: "Then I hope you won't make jokes like this that will damage the reputation of your classmates in the future."
The farce ended here.
There was a slight noise coming from the chair. Bo Xia sat down and carefully opened the tutorial book. The lines of her profile were blurred by the light, making her look gentle and indifferent.
Zhou Suiye thought she needed his help, but he didn't expect she could solve it by herself. He propped up his chin and looked at her, then picked up the pen next to him and hit her on the head.
Her eyes fell on him, as if asking him what he was doing. Zhou Suiye hesitated to speak, and after a while he chuckled, "Nothing."
Bo Xia: “…”
The first class in the afternoon was Chinese. Bo Xia's paper was taken away by the homeroom teacher, so she and Zhou Suiye shared the same paper. She held her chin in her hand as she watched her deskmate start scribbling on the paper, then drew a speechless cat next to it.
This immediately made Zhou Suiye's simple sketches look like a child's.
So he started writing in pencil: "Going out on Sunday?"
"I'm going to the library to study with Wen Xin."
Also addicted to studying.
Zhou Suiye thought for a moment and said, "Let's go together. I'll help you get Jin Yunyan."
She looked at the marks left on his paper, afraid that others would see it, so she took out an eraser and erased the name: "Is it okay?"
The response he got was someone's usual tactic: "Beg me."
"..." Bo Xia was a little embarrassed. He didn't remember what Zhou Suiye said last time. He carefully drew a cat with a pleading expression on the side. "Please."
"Okay."
It would have been a bit boring to study physics on Sunday, but because of what Zhou Suiye promised her, she felt much more motivated to get up.
The girl got up early on purpose, holding a bottle of milk and sitting at the door near Zhou Suiye's house waiting for him. When the man came out, she handed him the milk and said, "Here, drink it."
"so good?"
She looked up and smiled at him. Her bangs were a little messy because she had just run fast, but it looked a bit messy and beautiful.
Zhou Suiye muttered to himself: "Okay, it's worthy of the conditions I promised Jin Yunyan."
The two walked side by side, with tall camphor trees on both sides of the road.
She asked him what conditions he agreed to. Zhou Suiye sighed and began to play the victim, saying that the dog asked him to bring breakfast for a month. Bo Xia was a little surprised: "He doesn't seem to like breakfast very much. Did he ask you to help bring it?"
"How do you know?" Zhou Suiye thought for a moment, "Bo Xiaoxia, you're a little perverted."
She stammered to explain that she only observed them occasionally.
Zhou Suiye continued the previous topic: "And when I went to him, he was very reluctant and kept asking me to beg him. Do you think there is such a way to be friends?"
Bo Xia was completely unaware of Jin Yunyan's dark side, and didn't know he was deliberately teasing Zhou Suiye. After a moment's thought, he said, "But he finally agreed, which shows he still has a soft heart."
"……"Oh.
After walking two steps, Zhou Suiye was still a little unhappy and took the opportunity to discredit Jin Yunyan: "Do you think he is perfect? When you really get to know him, you will know that he is a bit bad. He usually uses the old routine to trick me into doing things for him."
Bo Xia blinked her eyelashes and said, "That's because you're also very bad. Last time, you made Jin Yunyan stand with us as punishment."
“…” He values women over friends.
When they arrived at the agreed place, Bo Xia was reading the vocabulary booklet when she suddenly heard a familiar voice. Her heart trembled and she subconsciously raised her head.
In the field of vision, Jin Yunyan was wearing a loose double-sided jacket. The overall color was gentle white, with a touch of bold red showing through the outside of the clothes. It was different from the impression he usually gave people. He had a more youthful vibe. He took off his headphones and said, "Let's go."
Wen Xin was stunned, and Zhou Suiye was almost as stunned. He couldn't help but ask, "Who are you trying to seduce dressed like this?"
No wonder the school requires us to wear uniforms. If we didn’t wear uniforms, many girls would just stare at the dog.
Jin Yunyan was used to his friend's unreasonable questions. Who could he seduce? This was his usual style: "Seduce you, okay?"
"..." Even a narcissist like Zhou Suiye couldn't stand this tone, "Stay away from me, I'm not gay."
Even after saying this, Jin Yunyan still put his hand on Zhou Suiye's shoulder. He was not usually proactive or clingy, but seeing his friend resisting, he moved closer to him.
This made Zhou Suiye run while asking Jin Yunyan to stay away from him.
In front of the library is a long staircase that seems to have no end.
One person was running in front, while the other, carrying a white schoolbag on one shoulder, followed with a smile. His world was bold and unrestrained, as if it couldn't accommodate the tiny girl.
But how could Jin Yunyan know that in a certain corner, he was the whole world in her eyes.
She and Wen Xin walked slowly behind and followed.
With the help of the top students, everyone learned more smoothly. In the last few minutes, a few people started to review the papers, competing to see who could finish them faster.
Jin Yunyan did not participate because he was sitting in the judges' seat. He got up and left the study room to borrow a book.
After Bo Xia finished, she looked up at the two people who were glaring at each other and said she was done. Wen Xin and Zhou Suiye almost came to blows, their desire to win aroused.
"Whoever finishes last gets to treat us tonight."
“Who is afraid of Who?”
In the end, the war ended with Wen Xin's victory. As for her accuracy, it was a little hard to say. She was used to bullying Zhou Suiye and made a face at him: "I'm done! Writing! It's your treat tonight!"
Zhou Suiye said disdainfully: "If you want to treat me, then treat me. The last thing I lack is money."
Wen Xin packed her things, then remembered something and nudged Bo Xia's arm: "Hey, go find Jin Yunyan and tell him we're leaving."
"Me?" She pointed at herself, her expression hesitant.
"If not you, who else could it be, this person..." Seeing that Bo Xia was about to get angry, Wen Xin immediately changed her words, "You were the first one to finish writing, so of course you go."
Wen Xin couldn't suppress the smile. She wished these two people would be together right away so that she could ship them as a couple. Besides, her friend's shy look was quite cute.
She held her cheek to admire Bo Xia's blushing face. Zhou Suiye, who was standing by, couldn't stand it any longer: "Stop dawdling. The library will be closing soon."
Bo Xia nodded, searching through the rows of bookshelves for the figure she knew so well. She reached the very back, where she saw a tall young man leaning against a bookshelf, light streaming through his side.
She stood there, not knowing how to start.
After a few seconds, Jin Yunyan raised his head as if he had noticed something, and saw a girl in a light blue sweater and a ponytail standing not far away looking at him, with an expression that seemed a little timid.
He usually didn't have a deep impression of her, thinking she was timid, but she played well with others. Sometimes he would wonder if he looked too difficult to approach.
However, Jin Yunyan was not the type to study a girl's thoughts. He stood up, returned the book to its original place, and said in a gentle tone, "Have you finished the test paper? Let's go."
"Yeah." She nodded.
Bo Xia followed behind him, her eyes sweeping across his slender hands, remembering that he had just sat opposite her during tutoring. Those hands, as soft as jade, were so beautiful that people dared not look directly at them. There were blue veins on them, giving people a sense of maturity.
He was so close to her, but their shadows hardly overlapped.
As the group walked out of the library, Zhou Suiye said nonchalantly, "I really want to create a small account and post something on Tieba with the title 'Shocking! Top students secretly involuntarily engage in weekend involution.'"
Wen Xin was speechless: "Real top students don't think that studying is something to announce to the world. They just study silently."
"What about Jin Yunyan? He doesn't seem to be working very hard."
"He's already out of the realm of academic tyrants, understand?"
They would fight every time they quarreled, and this time was no exception. The two of them ran farther and farther, leaving Bo Xia and Jin Yunyan behind.
Bo Xia walked very slowly. She had some selfish thoughts in her mind. Just when she was wondering whether she should initiate a conversation with Jin Yunyan, the person next to her spoke first: "Your shoelaces are undone."
She lowered her head, squatted down and carefully tied her shoelaces, and couldn't help but feel happy that he was looking at her.
She originally thought that she was dawdling like this, and probably would have to jog to catch up with them after tying her belt. The next second, when she looked up, Bo Xia saw that several people were still standing there. Zhou Suiye and Wen Xin were still fighting like childish elementary school students, but it was obvious that they were waiting for her.
Even Jin Yunyan, who was always reluctant to get along with others, turned sideways to look at her.
The sky was exceptionally beautiful that day. Bo Xia's heart trembled at the sight of it, and he hurriedly got up and chased after him.
After dinner, Bo Xia wanted to buy a set of exam papers, so they stopped by a bookstore. Wen Xin saw a time mailbox in the bookstore where one could write to their future selves. She was a little surprised and said, "Hey? Should we write a letter to ourselves ten years from now?"
Zhou Suiye came over and asked: "Are you sure this bookstore will still be there in ten years?"
"Oh, don't worry about it."
Even though they knew they might not receive the letter ten years later, several people still started writing letters. Bo Xia glanced at Jin Yunyan opposite him, not knowing what he wrote.
She picked up the pen—
"Hello, I am you from ten years ago.
Ten years ago, you were looking forward to the future.
How are you now? Did you get into the university of your dreams? Did you study architecture? Did you leave Nan'an and live the life you wanted? Do you still remember your first crush? Is there anything else going on between you two?
I really want to go there that day and see if you have become a better me.
But I thought about it, when that day comes, it won't matter whether the answers to these questions are yes or no. Right now, I'm hanging out with my best friends, and the person I like is sitting across from me.
Wen Xin is right. We all have the right to be our best selves, but no one can deny who we are now or in the past. So, I'm doing very well and happy now, and I hope you'll be the same ten years from now.
Even if you don't live the life you want, I hope you can always keep that courage and kindness, and move forward firmly in that dark passage where no light can be seen. Even if your heart is in a corner, you must still look towards the sun.
We all want to go where the lights are.
——Bo Xia"
The tip of the pen made a dot after the last word. Zhou Suiye deliberately leaned over to see what she had written. She quickly closed the envelope and said, "Let's go."
"Let me see it."
She ignored him and went to the cashier, sealing the letter there.
Zhou Suiye, who got no response, looked at Wen Xin again. Wen Xin said, "Get lost."
The sunset was beautiful, its orange light staining the shimmering lake. A few people walked by the lake, and Wen Xin suddenly said, "Do you think we can become who we want to be in ten years?"
No one can confirm the answer to this question.
Bo Xia's hair was blown by the wind: "Maybe."
As long as they work hard and keep moving forward, they will probably reach the future they want.
Several people stood in a row leaning against the railings, admiring the sun setting slowly. Zhou Suiye suddenly shouted into the distance, like a middle school boy, saying that it was nothing difficult, and that he would become a big boss in the future so that they would not be able to reach him.
Wen Xin scolded him for being sick.
Back then, they were in their prime, full of youthful arrogance, and always felt that they were the protagonists of the world, and they could do anything they wanted. Even if it meant getting bruised and bloodied, they still wanted to jump up and poke a hole in the sky.
That was their best seventeen years.
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