Regarding Li Huashi's actions, Grandma Yun said it was difficult to comment, and she felt that it might be because she was old and therefore could not understand the thoughts of young people.
Li Huashi looked at Grandma Yun's expression and could actually guess what she was thinking.
Actually, when I think about it now, maybe it’s because I’ve let it go.
So looking back on the past, Li Huashi can judge rationally that it was indeed difficult for Li Changsheng to fall in love with her back then.
After all, at the beginning, I didn't pester him because I really loved him.
Li Huashi continued, “But in the end… in the end he still didn’t love me, and I couldn’t bear to see him die… even though he wanted me to die.
Even though I hate him, I still... still don't want him to die.
If he dies...he's really dead...he's gone...he's gone...
He no longer exists in this world...
Master, can you understand what I am trying to say?"
Grandma Yun touched Li Huashi's head and nodded: "I understand. Once a person dies, there is no room for regret, and we will never see each other again in the future.
Sometimes, I also thought that although the Shen Yao Villa restricted our freedom and we could only go out to travel once in our lifetime, when we were young, but if I had to choose, I still hoped that the Shen Yao Villa could exist.
Even if it’s just a glance from a distance, it’s good.”
Li Huashi hugged Grandma Yun and nestled her head in her arms.
The tip of my nose was filled with the faint scent of herbs from the other person.
He continued, "Later... I completely gave up on him and no longer loved him. I hated him... But later I didn't hate him anymore..."
In fact, Li Huashi didn't let go because of that person's Mengpo soup.
What really made her let go of Li Changsheng was that after being with Xiao Yu, she discovered one day that, perhaps because of the lover Gu, Xiao Yu was not confident in his love...
She discovered that Xiao Yu was afraid of losing herself.
At that moment, she no longer cared about Li Changsheng.
In other words, she no longer cared about the ending of her first life.
“Finally, I fell in love with another person.
Actually, at first I thought that I liked him because he was very similar to the person I liked at the beginning.
Just as powerful, just as powerful... His body seemed to be glowing, very dazzling.
Only later did I realize that the reason I fell in love with him was because he was a very good and excellent person.
The longer I spend with him, the more I understand the saying: home is where he is.
He is a very gentle person. He dissipated my hostility towards the world and soothed my uneasy heart.
Maybe it’s because... I’ve been with him for too long.
I was used to him being around me, so when he left me one day, I couldn't accept the reality. "
Li Huashi did not mention Xiao Yu to Grandma Yun. There was no need to, after all, it had been a long time ago.
"At that moment, I felt like I had no home... I felt like I had nowhere to go... I turned back into the stray dog I used to be, willing to die anywhere..."
As she spoke, Li Huashi could no longer hold back her tears.
With tears in her eyes, she gave a mocking smile. Yes, wild dog… That’s how she had always viewed herself.
In order to avoid being bullied, stray dogs become wild dogs that are hated, rejected and driven away by people.
When he's unhappy or feels hurt, he bites anyone he can find.
She didn't want to be a poor stray dog who ate food fed by others because she trusted others easily, but was poisoned or tortured to death.
She would rather be a wild dog that is hated by everyone and steals other people’s food. . .
Grandma Yun stroked her head lovingly and comforted her silently.
"At that time, I met Li Xuan and Ji Huxie."
"In the beginning, I hated Ji Huxie. Because his face was very similar to the person I liked at the beginning... and also because, at that time, I was very angry."
"Then something happened and I lost my memory... I didn't expect that I would still fall in love with him."
"It made me feel like I was sorry for my deceased lover, and at the same time, I felt like a failure for having lost to the person I started with."
The first time I came to this world, I met him. After I lost my memory, I still fell in love with him...
It's as if... I'm destined to fall into his hands... It makes me feel a little unwilling.
After listening to what Li Huashi said, Grandma Yun roughly understood what she was thinking.
Grandma Yun said slowly: “In fact, I know that you understand a lot of truths in your heart.
It’s just that those who are involved are often confused, while those who are not involved can see things clearly. You are unable to overcome the psychological barrier for the time being.
Your deceased lover must also hope that even without him/her by your side, you can still live well, take good care of yourself, and live the rest of your life well. "
Li Huashi suddenly thought of the former Qiao Wanwan.
Yes... If it were Li Lianhua, he would indeed hope that he could still live a good life after his death.
Because her Huahua... is a very good person... He would rather endure the pain himself than become a cause of hesitation and concern for others.
Therefore, after the East China Sea War, he was poisoned and chose to wait for death silently after seeing Qiao Wanwan's letter, not disturbing his old friend...
Grandma Yun: "Besides, do you really not care about him? Is he really the one you hate?"
Li Huashi opened her mouth, wanting to say that he was the same person.
Grandma Yun: "The person you hate is not him, right? Even if they look similar, he should not have done anything to hurt your heart, right?"
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