A heart with nowhere to go
"Brother, could it be... Leng Yue?" Chou Doufu felt a little unbelievable.
Feng Yan and the other person nodded.
"We have fought with Leng Yue, and she is quite skilled in martial arts," said Shangguan Yan.
"Leng Yue said before that she didn't know martial arts. Was she lying to us?" asked Chou Doufu.
"Impossible, my diagnosis will never be wrong." Ouyang Mingri said.
"Maybe she has some strange skills that can temporarily suppress her internal energy and prevent it from being released? I remember Leng Yue has a method that can heal people without using internal energy. Perhaps she has even more strange methods that we don't know about." Sima Changfeng speculated.
"Although Leng Yue is a member of the Shenyue Sect, fortunately she still has a conscience and has not actually done anything evil. But... if those people hadn't died, where would they be now?" Chou Doufu was puzzled.
Ouyang Mingri seemed to suddenly remember something and said, "City Lord, I'll leave this matter to you. Gongsun Heng must be placed in a safe and secret place. Externally, it must still be announced that he has been killed by Jade-faced Begonia. The funeral and other matters will proceed as usual. As for Elder Gongsun, I'm afraid you'll have to speak to him."
"Don't worry, big brother. This is easy to deal with." Chou Doufu said, "I wonder what your plans are?"
"Ban Tianyue's ambitions are growing. We must secretly train elite soldiers to counter Ban Tianyue's power. This incident presents an opportunity," Ouyang Ming said. "The city lord can post an imperial edict in the city soon, stating that Yumian Haitang has murdered righteous men and assassinated imperial officials. Her crimes are unforgivable. Whoever can capture Yumian Haitang alive will be rewarded with a thousand taels of silver."
"Okay, leave it to me." said Chou Tofu.
By June, the weather was getting hotter and the crabapple blossoms in the courtyard were withering one after another, leaving only withered petals on the ground and lush green leaves on the trees.
Ling Xue came to the courtyard with a plate of snacks and a pot of fine wine. Seeing Ouyang Mingri observing the celestial phenomena, she said gently, "Brother, I made some midnight snacks. Let's eat together."
Ouyang Mingri smiled amiably: "Okay."
Every time he saw Lingxue, Mingri would unconsciously think of Yingying, remembering how he used to bully her and argue with her. Now that Yingying was gone, Mingri always wanted to be extra nice to this little sister who looked so much like Yingying.
"It's so late, why aren't you asleep yet?" Mingri asked.
"Seeing that my elder brother is not asleep, I can't sleep either," said Ling Xue.
"I'm observing the stars at night. What about you? Are you worried about something?" Ouyang Mingri asked with a smile.
"Brother is not observing the stars at night." Ling Xue said.
"Oh?" Mingri's eyebrows moved slightly.
"Brother is thinking about that bad woman from the Shenyue Sect." Ling Xue said with a pout.
Ouyang Mingri was a little unhappy, but still asked with a smile: "Girl, who told you this?"
"Brother, there are many beautiful women out there. That bad woman has killed so many heroes. She is not worthy of you at all. Why are you still thinking about her?" Ling Xue continued.
Ouyang Mingri said expressionlessly, "I wasn't thinking about her. I was just enjoying the night. If you must bring this up, I'll go back first."
After saying this, he stood up and was about to leave. Then, worried that his words might be too harsh and hurt Ling Xue, he turned around and said to her, "Xiaoxue, since you are a princess, the less you know about court affairs, the better. Otherwise, it might be disadvantageous to you. My eldest brother is an important official in the court, so he's bound to be busy on weekdays. Dad and Mom will have to take good care of him."
Ling Xue held back her tears and nodded unhappily.
"Go to bed early." Mingri returned to his usual gentleness.
Ling Xue ran away crying. Ouyang Mingri sighed and shook his head.
Ling Xue ran while crying, and unknowingly ran out of the villa. She found herself lost in the palace.
"What bad luck," Ling Xue thought to herself. The thought made her cry even harder.
After finishing the memorials, Chou Doufu was walking back to his bedroom when he suddenly heard a cry. He couldn't help but wonder, "Who is crying so late at night?"
He followed the sound and saw a face that looked very much like Yingying, crying with tears streaming down her face, looking extremely pitiful.
"Ling Xue? Why are you squatting here crying? What's wrong?" asked Chou Doufu.
Ling Xue saw that it was stinky tofu and turned to leave, but due to etiquette, she had to turn back and said in a tearful voice, "Ling Xue greets the City Lord."
"Stand up," Stinky Tofu asked with concern, "Who wronged you?"
Ling Xue didn't answer, but just kept crying.
Chou Doufu had never seen Yingying cry. Even at the moment of her death, she never shed a tear. Though Yingying had lived a life of luxury, she was lively and strong, even willing to sacrifice herself to protect him. And yet, he hadn't had the chance to love and cherish her before he let her pass away. Thinking of this, and looking at Lingxue again, he couldn't help but feel the urge to hug her.
Stinky Tofu held Ling Xue in his arms and said gently, "Cry."
Ling Xue cried for a while, then gradually calmed down. It was then that she suddenly realized she was in the City Lord's arms. She shuddered and quickly broke free from the stinky tofu's embrace, bowing frantically in panic. "I'm sorry, City Lord. Ling Xue is being rude."
Stinky Tofu gradually recovered from the situation and said sympathetically, "It's okay. Get up quickly. I'll take you home."
As they walked and talked, Chou Doufu finally understood what had happened to her because of Leng Yue. So, he consoled her, "Ling Xue, Big Brother is worried about you. After all, you're a girl, and you've heard and talked about too much of what's going on in the court. If the bad guys get to know, you could be killed. His tone might have been a little anxious, but I believe he didn't really mean to blame you, so don't be angry with him."
Ling Xue nodded, but still grumbled unwillingly, "I really don't know what big brother likes about her."
Stinky Tofu smiled helplessly and said, "You don't need a reason to like someone. If you must have a reason, it's willingness—willing to give, willing to love, and even willing to sacrifice everything for the other person."
Speaking of this, Chou Doufu thought of Yingying again, and felt infinitely sad.
When Ling Xue heard what Chou Doufu said, although she was still a little jealous, she didn't say anything else. She just muttered in her heart: Brother, you are so willing to her, I wonder if she is also willing to you?
"Lingxue, we're here," said Chou Doufu, "Go back and have a good rest."
Ling Xue nodded. Just as Chou Doufu was about to leave, she grabbed his sleeve again.
"What's wrong?" asked Stinky Tofu.
"You are nice to me because of... Yingying?" Ling Xue asked timidly.
Stinky Tofu sighed, but as the city lord, he had long learned to suppress his sadness deep in his heart.
He smiled and said, "Lingxue, you think too much. You are my Huangfu Renhe's sister-in-law, my relative, and it's my duty to treat you well. Go to bed early."
Looking at the lonely back of Chou Doufu, Ling Xue went back in disappointment.
Ouyang Mingri was no longer in the courtyard. Now, Shangguan Yan and Sima Changfeng were sitting on the stone bench in the courtyard drinking and admiring the moon.
In the hazy moonlight, Sima Changfeng's angular face looked even more robust and handsome. He was a man whose very appearance gave one a sense of security. However...
Looking at Shangguan Yan's beautiful smile, Ling Xue felt even more sad.
Why is everyone so preoccupied with their own affairs? Is it because I arrived a few days late that their hearts are already occupied by someone else? When it comes to relationships, it's always best to strike first.
No matter how bad other women were, they had already taken the lead and lived in their hearts before her. Even a murderous female devil like Leng Yue, a cold-faced killer like Shangguan Yan, and a willful princess like Yingying had already become a permanent mark in their hearts. No matter how painful or worthless it was, as the city lord said, they were willing to accept it.
----How willing.
No matter how gentle, considerate, and understanding you are, you can only be someone else's shadow or substitute. Perhaps, no matter how hard you try, others will only be touched, not truly develop any feelings for you? Even if, by some stroke of luck, there is a small degree of affection, or even a marriage, I'm afraid it will never hold the same place in their hearts as those women do.
"Love isn't about whether it's worth it or not, it's about whether you're willing or not. They're willing, they're happy with it, but what about me? For whom should I be happy with it?"
Qiao Lingxue had lived with her father since childhood, but he had been bedridden for years, forcing her to work as a laborer. Sometimes she'd be sewing at three in the morning, then waking up at five to work again. Like a donkey, she was driven by life's whipping to earn money, earning money, just to buy medicine for her father. Only by working day and night could the family eat. At least there was hope in those days, but her father passed away. Lingxue's wages weren't enough to buy her father a proper coffin, so she had to sell herself to bury him.
Fortunately, she met the kind-hearted Madam Yuzhu, who helped her bury her father and adopted her as her adopted daughter. Ling Xue was extremely happy. Madam Yuzhu had once said that she looked a bit like her own daughter, but she never expected that she would actually look exactly like Princess Yingying, whom she had never met.
Furthermore, everyone treated her like Princess Yingying. Whether they loved her or indulged her, it wasn't because she was any good in herself. It wasn't because she was well-behaved, it wasn't because she was gentle, and it had nothing to do with the name Qiao Lingxue. It was simply because she looked like Yingying.
Even Yuzhu's stepmother loved her so much because she looked like Yingying.
Now that she was a princess, she no longer had to endure the hardship of her past, yet she felt she had fallen into even deeper despair. When would this noble life, this respectful family affection, this love that had nowhere to go, ever end?
"Who can I really rely on?" Ling Xue asked crying.
In the silent night, there was no answer.
She really wants to have someone to rely on.
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