Chapter 80 Destiny
All this happened in a flash, so fast that no one could catch it. After all, no one would have thought that a person who was so sick that he was only breathing his last breath could have such strength, like a beast making its last desperate struggle before death.
Lu Yan lowered his eyes and looked at the blade against his neck, but he did not panic: "You want to kill me?"
Shang Junnian stared at him coldly: "Shouldn't I kill you?"
Lu Yan suddenly smiled: "He deserves to be killed."
He deserves to be killed.
"My Lu family has done you so much harm, so it is only natural that you want to kill me," Lu Yanyu closed his eyes and said unexpectedly frankly, "Kill me if you want."
“…”
Shang Junnian paused when he heard this, his face changing from gloomy to bright. He tightened and loosened his grip on the knife handle, and the overwhelming hatred in his heart seemed particularly ironic in the other party's indifferent expression.
Kill?
What would happen if I killed Lu Yan? There was no going back...
His martial arts, his life, including Wu Yun who had abandoned him as a waste, could never be restored...
After Shang Junnian realized this, he suddenly lost all hope, and the blade against Lu Yan's throat slowly fell down. He forced out a sarcastic smile, not knowing whether he was laughing at Lu Yan or at himself: "Death is the easiest thing, but it's a pity that I can't live to see your end, to see the fairy mountains and rivers collapse, the country destroyed and the family ruined--"
Lu Yan sensed something was wrong when he heard this, and opened his eyes suddenly, only to see the direction of the blade in Shang Junnian's hand suddenly change, and stab towards his heart with a ruthless look. He quickly grabbed the dagger and shouted in a deep voice: "You are crazy!"
The sharp blade cut his palm and blood dripped down. Not only did Lu Yan not let go, but he tightened his grip even more, and he and Shang Junnian were in a stalemate.
Lu Yan's eyes were cold: "Do you really want to die?!"
The veins on Shang Junnian's hands bulged. He was clearly a worn-out body, but he did not slacken his strength holding the knife. He gritted his teeth silently and said, "If you don't kill me today, I will kill you someday!"
Lu Yan asked back: "Then why didn't you do it when I asked you to just do it?!"
“…”
Shang Junnian didn't know what to do. In that moment of distraction, the blade in his hand was snatched away by Lu Yan, and thrown to the ground with a clang. Lu Yan frowned and coldly ordered the maid guarding the door: "Throw it out, and no blades are allowed in the room from now on!"
The maid responded with a small sound and quickly cleared away the bloody dagger. The bead curtain fell again, as if nothing had happened.
The sharp knife was like Shang Junnian's spine. After it was pulled away, he slumped down on the side of the bed. His inky hair covered his face, making it impossible to see his expression clearly.
"As long as I live, you live. If you really want to die, kill me first."
Lu Yan didn't care about the cut on his palm. He pressed Shang Junnian to the bed to rest without changing his expression, and then covered him with a quilt. His face was still the same, but in the flickering candlelight, it felt completely different from before, as if the empty body suddenly had a soul, captivating people's hearts.
Shang Junnian did not move at all. In his lowered gaze, the only thing he could see was Lu Yan's hands, which were hanging quietly from his knees. They were slender and precious, with blood flowing through his white fingertips like a snake and then slowly falling.
“Tick…”
“Tick…”
Like his lingering life.
No one in the palace understood what Lu Yan was thinking. He no longer bullied men and women, nor did he enjoy torturing people like before. Every day, apart from going to the palace to tend to the emperor, he stayed in the palace without going out, personally taking care of the criminal brought out of prison.
Yes, take care of it yourself.
He never asked anyone else to do these things, such as taking medicine, feeding, changing clothes, and wiping the body.
It was the dead of winter, and the snow outside was getting thicker and thicker, but because there was a big charcoal fire burning in the house, it was so hot that people were sweating.
Shang Junnian lay on the bed with his eyes closed, allowing Lu Yan to wipe his body. The snow-white handkerchief gently brushed across his skin, forming a sharp contrast with his scarred body. His most private parts were exposed in front of each other. Shame and humiliation, it was hard to say which of these two emotions was more intense.
Lu Yan had no intention of doing anything romantic. He wiped Shang Junnian's body and changed the medicine on his wounds. Then he put clothes on him and ordered the maid to take away the basin and handkerchief in the room.
The colder the weather, the more Shang Junnian's bones hurt. He had suffered hidden injuries on his shoulders and knees, so it was not difficult to imagine how painful it was when the pain flared up, but he endured it without making a sound. Countless nights Lu Yan saw Shang Junnian tossing and turning in pain, unable to sleep, his body covered in cold sweat, his lips full of teeth marks.
The night deepens and the fireworks fade away, and the evening snow falls on the red door.
Lu Yan couldn't imagine for a moment how Shang Junnian survived those years in prison.
Lu Yan usually slept on a low couch at night, but he felt particularly cold tonight. For the first time, he shared a bed with Shang Junnian, separated by a quilt and neatly dressed clothes.
Lu Yan asked in the darkness: "It's a bit cold today, would you like me to sleep with you?"
The obscene words came out of his mouth as seriously as if they were national affairs.
Shang Junnian curled his lips, somewhat sarcastically, "If you can sleep, then sleep."
Lu Yan's appetite shouldn't be so special that he could have sex with a cripple. Besides, Shang Junnian had exposed his body to Lu Yan countless times due to his care over the past few days, so there was no need to cover it up anymore.
"Nothing to keep me awake."
Lu Yan lay down calmly, but saw Shang Junnian with his back to him. He turned around in the dark, looked at the back of his head and whispered, "I heard that Zhao Yuzhang has succeeded to the throne, but he has just ascended the throne, and his power is not stable. He is still an emperor in name only. Even if he wants to save you and bring you back to the country, he can't get around Wu Yun's group of court officials."
The emperor's desk was piled with memorials, most of which were from the new emperor Wu Yun, requesting that Shang Junnian be allowed to return to the country. Unfortunately, the emperor was seriously ill, and the King of Nanxun and the King of Guxu were assisting in supervising the country. They were all busy planning for their own interests, so they were not likely to agree to these trivial matters.
Shang Junnian heard this and quietly closed his eyes in the darkness: "Why are you telling me this?"
Lu Yan: "It's nothing. I'm afraid no one told you these things when you were in prison. It's inevitable that you were cut off from the news. I remembered that you had a good relationship with Zhao Yuzhang, so I told you about it."
He just wanted to tell Shang Junnian that not everyone had given up on him. At least Zhao Yuzhang was still trying to rescue him. He hoped that these things would discourage the other party from committing suicide.
Shang Junnian was silent for a moment before asking, "How did he ascend the throne?"
It is really puzzling how Zhao Yuzhang, with his brain, could successfully ascend the throne after returning to Wuyun alone.
Lu Yan also found it puzzling, so he deliberately inquired about it. His deep voice echoed in the darkness, mysterious and distant: "I heard that he first killed all his brothers and sisters, and then joined forces with the generals to rebel, and killed the previous emperor in the Jinque Palace, and then ascended the throne."
"But the general is very ambitious. If Zhao Yuzhang doesn't want to be a puppet emperor, he will have to endure it."
When Lu Yan heard these things, he was stunned for a while. In his memory, Zhao Yuzhang was still the loyal Zhao Yuzhang, who would argue and curse at him for his friends, and he would also sit on the stone steps and eat buns happily. The words regicide and fratricide had nothing to do with him.
I think the few years in Xianling have changed so many people.
Because Shang Junnian had his back to him, Lu Yan could not tell what the other person looked like, sad or angry? He just vaguely felt that the other person's body under the quilt trembled for a moment, revealing a deliberately suppressed tension.
Lu Yan hesitated for a moment, then hugged him through the quilt in the dark. He held Shang Junnian's cold hand and clasped it tightly in his palm: "When you recover from your injury, I will find a way to send you back to Wuyun. You can continue to be Zhao Yuzhang's minister and help him stabilize the country."
This was the best ending for Shang Junnian that Lu Yan could have imagined.
Shang Junnian's dark and silent eyes seemed to light up after hearing this, although it was as weak as a spark falling into the snow, which would go out on its own without the wind. He pursed his pale lips slightly and asked in a hoarse voice, "Really?"
Lu Yan: “Really.”
Shang Junnian: "King Fengling, you have done so much, what do you want?"
"Just think of it as..."
Lu Yan paused for a moment before saying, "Just think of it as... me atonement for my past sins."
The snow was so heavy this year that disaster reports from all over the country flew to the imperial city like snowflakes. The emperor heard the news even though he was ill, and his already poor health became worse.
On this day, Lu Yan had gone to the palace to attend to the sick, but he ran into King Guxu by chance at the palace gate. He couldn't help but pause and said, "Brother, what a coincidence."
King Guxu was still as kind as ever. He smiled when he saw Lu Yan and patted his shoulder. "Third brother, I heard that you often go in and out of the palace to visit father recently. You are different after all. You have grown up a lot. Father was praising you just now."
Lu Yan rarely got so close to King Guxu, so close that he could even smell the incense on his body, which was slightly sweet but also a little bitter. He felt a tightness in his chest. He held his breath without leaving a trace and said with a smile: "I am not very talented and learned, so I cannot supervise the country with my two brothers. I can only take care of my father and do my best."
King Guxu looked at him deeply and said: "You are filial, my father will be very happy and will love you more."
He stopped talking, made an excuse that he had something to do, turned around and left.
Lu Yan frowned and sniffed the remaining incense in the air, still feeling strange. Lu Sheng had always been self-righteous and gentlemanly, never using cosmetics, so how could he smell such a strong fragrance?
When they entered the palace to pay their respects, the emperor had just woken up from a nap. He used to be able to sit and talk with Lu Yan for a long time, but now he needed the help of Eunuch She even to sit up, looking like a dying emperor.
Seeing this, Lu Yan hurried forward and stuffed a soft pillow behind the emperor, explaining in a gentle voice: "Today, there is a heavy snowstorm on Zhuque Street, blocking the road. I am late by accident."
The emperor looked at him with a look full of love and relief: "It's so cold outside, you don't have to go into the palace every day."
Lu Yan knew that the emperor might not have much time left, and his heart became heavier. He smelled the strong smell of Chinese medicine in the air, and felt that he could not breathe. He held the emperor's hand tightly and said, "I am an unfilial son. I always caused trouble for my father. Now that my father is sick, I should be at his bedside to show my filial piety."
The Emperor sighed and said, "I'm afraid this year will be difficult. Disasters have occurred in various places. I have ordered your eldest brother to go and distribute food and disaster relief. I hope we can save a few people."
Lu Yan lowered his eyes and said, "Of course, the people below will take care of these things. Father should now concentrate on recuperating and not worry too much."
His eyes inadvertently swept across the emperor's hand, and he saw that the other's nails were a faint blue. He frowned secretly, and his suspicion grew.
The emperor waved his hand to Eunuch She, who immediately understood and turned around to get an exquisite small box from the study. On it was a picture of a pine and crane engraved with longevity. There was also a black jade stone inlaid in the crane's eye. It was a work of art that was extremely rare.
"Your birthday is at the end of the month. Times are tense right now, so it's not a good idea to have a grand celebration. Just consider this as your birthday gift. Open it on your birthday."
Lu Yan held the box in his hand and felt it was heavy. "Since it's my birthday at the end of the month, why should I give it to you now? It will be the same if you give it to me at the end of the month."
The Emperor only said, "Take it. I have a bad memory."
Lu Yan closed his eyes to hide his bitterness: "Thank you, father."
The emperor was not in good spirits, and after talking for a while he began to feel sleepy again, so Lu Yan took the initiative to say goodbye. Eunuch She sent him out of the palace, and was about to turn back when he was suddenly stopped by Lu Yan:
"Please stay, eunuch—"
Eunuch She turned around in confusion and asked, "Does Your Highness have any important instructions?"
Lu Yan stepped forward and said, "Father doesn't look very well these days. What did the imperial physician say?"
Eunuch She: "I have consulted the imperial physician, and he said that your Majesty is not in good spirits because of the winter fatigue."
Lu Yan asked again: "Has Second Brother been to the palace often recently?"
Eunuch She hesitated for a moment and said, "Because of the fact that Prince Guxu is the regent, His Majesty often summons him, and he has to go to the palace every few days."
Lu Yan said, "I see that father's nails are blue, I think it's because of deficiency of Qi and blood, I have to trouble Eunuch She to keep an eye on the kitchen and stew something to replenish Qi and blood for father."
Lu Yan stopped talking and turned away, leaving Eunuch She standing there with a stern expression, unable to hide his shock.
The King of Guxu was always cruel and merciless. I wonder if the news that Lu Yan had been frequently visiting the palace to take care of the sick recently had irritated him, and he actually secretly poisoned the emperor. Now the King of Nanxun was out doing disaster relief, and Lu Yan had always had a bad reputation. If the emperor suddenly died, the throne would definitely be his.
Lu Yan was worried that he might anger the Emperor by speaking too directly, so he could only secretly remind Eunuch She. However, a few days after he returned home, news came from the palace that King Guxu had been stripped of his title and imprisoned. At the same time, the Emperor urgently summoned King Nanxun back to the capital overnight, which caused a lot of discussion in the court and the public, and it seemed that a storm was about to come.
"Your Majesty, His Majesty has ordered you to enter the palace urgently!"
Eunuch She came at midnight, looking anxious, as if something big had happened.
Lu Yan's face changed, knowing that the emperor might be in trouble: "Who else did the emperor summon?"
Eunuch She whispered, "There is also the Prince of Nanxun and several royal relatives, as well as the four great ministers waiting in the study. There is no time to waste, so hurry up and enter the palace."
Lu Yan's expression was solemn: "Eunuch, please go back first. I will be there soon."
Lu Yanyu hurried into the inner room to change his clothes. Before leaving, he remembered something and took out the birthday gift that the emperor gave him last time from the drawer. He opened the golden lock hanging outside and saw half a tiger-shaped military token lying quietly inside, and a blank imperial edict in bright yellow with the national seal on it. He could not help but be stunned on the spot.
"It seems that the Emperor will not pass the throne to you..."
Shang Junnian's voice suddenly rang out from behind, breaking the silence in the room. After a period of recuperation, he was able to walk again, but his face was pale and he was still weak, which made his cold, fox-like eyes look even darker and deeper.
Lu Yan turned his head to look at him, but heard Shang Junnian say: "This is something the emperor left for you to save your life. I'm afraid that after tonight, King Nanxun will be made the crown prince."
Lu Yan tightened his fingertips: "Are you so sure?"
Shang Junnian did not answer, but said: "Take the tiger talisman with you into the palace, you will need it."
Lu Yan listened to him and put the tiger talisman into his arms. After doing all this, he rolled up the blank bright yellow imperial edict and stuffed it into Shang Junnian's hand. He pressed it so hard that it even hurt. He said word by word: "Keep it for me."
Shang Junnian was stunned and was about to refuse, but he saw Lu Yan left the room like a gust of wind and rode to the palace with his guards.
Inside the emperor's bedroom, a crowd of people knelt on the floral carpet beside him. They were all high-ranking officials. The Prince of Nanxun knelt first, followed by Lu Yan. The air was filled with a tense atmosphere that made people dare not even breathe.
The emperor lay in bed, his aged voice coming through the curtains, recounting his life's achievements, while the moon covered by dark clouds outside the window seemed to symbolize the emperor's fall:
"I have been on the throne for thirty-seven years. I can say that the world is peaceful and the sea is calm. The twelve continents have been incorporated into the fairyland, and all nations have submitted to me. I can rest assured to see my ancestors after my death. However, my descendants are not virtuous, and I don't know if they can protect the country I left behind..."
Prince Nanxun knelt a few steps forward, weeping and saying, "Father, it's all because of your unfilial son! Your unfilial son!"
Although he was reckless, he was actually quite sad at the moment and burst into tears.
The emperor paused for a moment before saying, "The country cannot be without a ruler for a day. Prince Nanxun is brave and good at fighting. He is my first son and will surely inherit the throne. I now grant him the imperial seal and make him the crown prince. He will sit in the East Palace and carry on the rule for thousands of years. I have been ill for a long time, but state affairs cannot be neglected for long. All matters reported by the various departments shall be decided by the crown prince with the imperial seal, and there is no need to report back to me..."
After he finished speaking such a long paragraph, his chest rose and fell, and he took a deep breath before saying, "Prince, you have always been kind-hearted. After I die, please treat your brothers well, otherwise I will not be able to close my eyes in the afterlife."
Prince Nanxun kowtowed heavily, stepped forward, held the trembling hand of the Emperor, and said, "Don't worry, Father. I will treat my second and third brothers well and will not let you down..."
"That's good... That's good..."
The emperor didn't know where he got the strength from, and turned his head with difficulty to look at the courtiers kneeling outside. His eyes swept across a row of figures in red official uniforms, and finally stopped at Lu Yan.
That was his most beloved son.
Lu Yan did not raise his head from beginning to end, kneeling on the ground respectfully. The emperor saw that the white marble floor in front of him was covered with tear marks, and he clenched his fists tightly to prevent himself from crying out loud.
When the Emperor was dying, he did not ask Lu Yan to come forward. Now that the immortal spirit was going to have a new master, if he was too fond of Lu Yan, it would not be a good thing. So he just held the hand of King Nanxun tightly and said, "After I pass away, I am afraid that the news will spread and shock the court and the country, and all countries will be ready to take action. Remember to keep it a secret... and... and the third brother..."
"Next spring... let him return to his fiefdom... from now on he is not allowed to enter the capital without an imperial decree..."
The emperor seemed to have anticipated the backlash of the war that year. The various countries secretly colluded to rebel. Sending troops was just a matter of timing. Otherwise, he would never have said the four words "keep the death a secret". Lu Yan knelt below, and heard the King of Nanxun suddenly burst into tears, followed by the sad voice of Eunuch She: "Your Majesty!"
The court officials were panicked and rushed forward:
"His Majesty!"
"His Majesty!"
The emperor passed away. His life was truly heroic, after all, he was the only monarch from ancient times to the present who could unify the twelve continents. But his life was also truly sad, because the sins he committed in the wars would soon backfire on his descendants.
Lu Yan didn't know how he left the bedroom, or how he returned to the palace. He was in a daze, and saw only the sky and the earth, all white.
Shang Junnian did not sleep all night. At dawn, he saw Lu Yan coming back from the palace. He had changed into a plain white suit outside his gorgeous royal robe. He stepped forward and said subconsciously, "You..."
Lu Yan rubbed his frozen face and said calmly: "My father has passed away, and the King of Nanxun will soon ascend the throne. I will return to my fiefdom in the spring of next year."
But he knew he couldn't go back, and at this moment, the fairy spirit was like a collapsing building, impossible to stand up again.
Lu Yanyu looked at Shang Junnian, his eyes brighter than ever before: "They will attack soon. When the time comes, I will send you to see Zhao Yuzhang."
Shang Junnian frowned and asked in confusion: "They? Who?"
At that time he could not understand what Lu Yan meant. It was not until not long after King Nanxun ascended the throne that the news of the emperor's death spread throughout the countries. Wuyun, Dongli and Tianshui suddenly gathered their troops and rose up, attacking the immortals. Only then did Shang Junnian finally understand who the "they" referred to.
Fairy, dying.
And their destiny also swept in like a tide, leaving them with no way to retreat.
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