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"System, check in."
Lin Zhou slumped in the creaking bamboo rocking chair, not even lifting his eyelids, his voice lazy, like a cat that had just sunbathed.
[Ding! Check-in successful.]
[Reward: 500 years of cultivation.]
The familiar mechanical voice echoed in his mind, and Lin Zhou clicked his tongue, saving himself most of the energy to even complain.
He glanced at the old, crooked locust tree outside the courtyard, its bark cracked and its branches sparse, much like the dilapidated sect he was currently in—the Qingyun Sect.
Including today, it has been a full thirty-eight years since he transmigrated to this world.
Thirty-eight years! How many thirty-eight years does one have in a lifetime?
Back when he first transmigrated, he thought he had a system in his hands and was destined to reach the pinnacle of cultivation, reviving the once-renowned Qingyun Sect of the Southern Region. He thought he would be like other protagonists, destined to be born for this world, crushing everything and suppressing all, standing in the void and shouting, "Hahahaha, I am invincible!" But what happened? He spent all his time signing in. Of course, even if he really became invincible, he wouldn't do that—it would be too childish. It was just a thought.
The system is real, and you can get things by signing in, but apart from the daily, unchanging "X years of cultivation", "a piece of a certain ore", and "a certain weed", this broken system is like it has crashed. Forget about main quests and side quests, it doesn't even bother to give you a "newbie guide". But I don't care anymore. I've read a lot of those system novels before, and I understand the general idea. Sometimes I think this kind of life is pretty good.
Lin Zhou stretched, his joints making a series of crisp cracking sounds, but he was completely unaware of it.
“Hey system,” he muttered to the air, “are you a broken record that has come to life? Thirty-eight years, signing in every day, can’t you come up with something different? Even a roast chicken would be nice, the wild rabbit we had yesterday was too dry.”
[...] The system remained silent.
“Look at this sect,” Lin Zhou tapped the ground with his toe, raising a cloud of dust, “it’s in such a state of disrepair. There’s more plaster on the walls than I have dandruff, the steps are chipped, and the training ground is overgrown with grass taller than a person. I don’t know how glorious it was back then, but now… I doubt you could even hit a second living person with a stone.”
He was the only sect leader of the Qingyun Sect, a lone commander. When he first took over, he symbolically cleaned for two days, but later realized it was a complete waste of effort—since no one was watching anyway, he simply gave up and did nothing.
【The time is not right.】The system finally displayed those four words.
"The time isn't right yet?" Lin Zhou chuckled, turning over so the sunlight shone directly on his belly. "Thirty-eight years, brother. Did your 'timing' have a difficult birth in the womb? I've gone from a young lad to almost a middle-aged man, and this is what you show me?"
He's a real couch potato.
Before transmigrating, he was a 996 office worker whose biggest dream was to retire and lie down. After transmigrating, he became a sect leader. Although the sect was a bit dilapidated, it was peaceful and quiet. No one cared about him, and he even came with a system to feed him. It was practically a retirement paradise tailor-made for him.
So he settled into a carefree life of walking his bird (an old spotted dove he picked up in the back mountain of the sect), playing with his dog (a stray dog that ran off from the village at the foot of the mountain, which he had fed with leftovers and had become quite docile; after eating what he was fed, it was getting more and more arrogant and was always running around), sunbathing, and taking afternoon naps.
The cultivation level given by the system? Just let it accumulate. Anyway, he's never tried fighting, and he has no interest in competing for territory or resources. Whether his cultivation level is high or low doesn't make much difference to him—he can still sleep soundly, and he doesn't even know how powerful he is, so he's not in a hurry.
Resources given by the system? Just throw them in the warehouse. What "millennial black iron" or "ninth-grade spiritual herbs" are no different from roadside stones or weeds in the yard in his eyes. At most, he might occasionally pick up a stone that looks round and smooth and use it to weigh down a pickle jar.
Over time, he himself forgot how much cultivation he had accumulated and how many treasures were piled up in his warehouse. If other people saw it, their jaws would drop in astonishment.
It's enough as long as it's enough—oh no, enough to lie down in.
“I’m telling you, system,” Lin Zhou yawned, a few tears welling up in his eyes, “why don’t you just go into hibernation? It’s the same routine every day anyway, I can do it for you with my eyes closed. Sign in, get the reward, that’s it. So much easier.”
[...] The system fell silent again, as if acquiescing to his suggestion.
Lin Zhou squinted his eyes in satisfaction. The sunlight was warm and pleasant, the shadow of the old locust tree swayed on the ground, doves dozed on the branches, and wild dogs lay at his feet with their tongues lolling out.
Life was peaceful and quiet, and apart from the occasional annoyance of the system's "repeating behavior," everything perfectly met his standards of a lazy, unambitious life.
"Sigh," he sighed, but his tone carried a hint of contentment, "So be it. Anyway, taking on disciples and expanding the temple is too much trouble, and conquering the world is out of the question. This little dilapidated temple of mine is comfortable enough for me to live in."
Sometimes Lin Zhou would think how wonderful it would be to have more people, but he would immediately dismiss the thought. What if their personalities clashed? It was too noisy, too annoying. It was better to be alone—quiet, and I could do whatever I wanted.
He rolled over, intending to take a nap in the warm sunshine, pondering whether to make pheasant soup for lunch or stir-fry some medicinal herbs and eggs—after all, those "weeds" in the warehouse, all sorts of mushrooms, tasted quite delicious.
As for the cultivation points that arrive daily, they're just piling up inside the body. Who cares if this broken system will ever "find its time"?
The word "anxiety" doesn't exist in a salted fish's dictionary.
Lin Zhou's breathing gradually became steady, and he was about to drift off to sleep when the system voice in his mind suddenly changed. It was no longer the flat, mechanical voice, but instead carried a... eerie fluctuation.
[Ding! Aura of an unparalleled genius detected!]
Lin Zhou: "?"
He opened his eyes abruptly, thinking he had misheard.
[Forced Quest Triggered: Recruit this genius as your apprentice.]
[Mission Requirements: Within three days, have him become a disciple of the Qingyun Sect and acknowledge the host as his master.]
[Task Reward: To be determined.]
[Mission failed: Annihilation.]
Lin Zhou: "???"
He sat up, looking blankly at the empty yard, then looked down at the stray dog wagging its tail at his feet.
"System?" he called out tentatively, "You... encountered a bug?"
Taking on an apprentice? Eliminating them?
"No way, no way, don't do this, bro! Life was going so well, I could chat with you and brag a bit, it was great, and now suddenly we get a mission, and if we don't complete it, we'll be wiped out."
This is completely different from his 38 years of being a lazy bum!
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