Chapter 104 Guilt
Shen Chutang was exhausted and leaned softly in Shi Chengyu's arms, sobbing with tears, and looking up and glaring at him from time to time.
Shi Chengyu took a wet tissue and wiped her hands and face, feeling distressed and helpless.
"I said, I said I don't want you, don't you understand?" Shen Chutang's voice was hoarse from crying, and the words she said had no power, but were still hurtful.
Shi Chengyu lowered his head and kissed her on the lips, "I understand. Tangtang thinks I am a ruthless person who will dislike you, so you don't want me."
"No!" Shen Chutang became anxious instantly. How could this person talk nonsense like this?
"What is that?" Shi Chengyu asked back. Shen Chutang looked at him anxiously, unable to speak.
Shi Chengyu looked at her calmly, "Because Tangtang felt that she was delaying me, she wanted to push me away."
"But Tangtang, I love you."
The sudden and straightforward statement made Shen Chutang lose the ability to think. She opened her lips slightly in surprise and stood there in a daze.
"Tangtang loves me too, doesn't she? If you wanted to push me away today for any other reason, maybe I would consider it."
"But if it's because of me, I don't agree."
The love in those eyes was so strong that it was impossible to ignore. Shen Chutang lowered his head, neither agreeing nor refusing.
After a long time, Shen Chutang raised his head and looked at him again, and said seriously, "Shi Chengyu, one year, I only give myself one year."
"If I can't stand up, we'll break up." She gritted her teeth and said these two words, tears streaming down her face.
Shi Chengyu felt a sharp pain in his heart and said in a deep voice, "Two years."
"Otherwise, forget it."
Shen Chutang pouted in grievance, "Shi Chengyu, you are so vicious."
Shi Chengyu immediately calmed down and held the person in his arms, "I'm sorry Tangtang, give me some time, and give yourself some more time, okay?"
He had never won a negotiation with Shen Chutang, and now that he had won he was still quietly apologizing, but he had no intention of obediently abiding by the negotiation agreement that Shen Chutang had won with great difficulty.
Shen Chutang's thoughts had drifted to two years later. She still couldn't stand up. She broke up with Shi Chengyu with great pain, crying out of breath.
Her hands that were covering her chest dropped down, she gasped rapidly, and her body shook uncontrollably.
"Tangtang, Tangtang?" Shi Chengyu noticed that something was wrong with her, and quickly took the breathing mask next to her and put it on her, then patted her back, "Relax Tangtang, relax, don't cry, don't cry."
"I'm sorry, it's all my fault. Tangtang, please stop crying, okay?"
He put the person on the bed in a panic, speaking incoherently, and only calmed down when the doctor came.
After taking the sedative, Shen Chutang fell asleep. Shi Chengyu gently wiped the tears from her face and bent down to kiss the corner of her lips.
Shi Chengyu had no intention of abiding by the negotiation agreement, and Shen Chutang had no such intention either.
The doctor said she couldn't tolerate drastic mood swings and couldn't stand stimulation.
She took advantage of these two sentences and vented her temper recklessly, trying to drive Shi Chengyu away early.
But two months later, no matter how unreasonable she was or how angry she got, Shi Chengyusi was not affected at all. Instead, he knew her temper well and started apologizing before she got angry.
"I just said I don't want to eat!"
Shen Chutang glared at him angrily, then turned his head away after a while.
She had grown a layer of hair on her head, which was black and soft. Shi Chengyu rubbed it and said, "Okay, I won't eat it anymore."
"I--"
Shi Chengyu kissed her skillfully, and the angry little cat instantly deflated, still staring at him with her round eyes.
"I didn't let you kiss me!"
"Okay, no more kissing." Shi Chengyu said this, but he pulled the person over and kissed her again, with a calm expression as if it was not him who had just agreed.
"You, you are cheating!"
Shi Chengyu rubbed her head and said, "I learned it from Tangtang."
"Tangtang is so mean to me, I have to get some reward? Huh?"
Shen Chutang crossed his arms and turned his head away, saying, "So what? If you find me a nuisance, you can leave."
Even though I have heard this many times, I still couldn't help but feel heartbroken for a moment.
Shi Chengyu hugged her from behind, kissed her head, and said softly, "Dear Tangtang, I didn't mean that. Tangtang wanted to make me accompany you, but you can't skip meals and you can't joke with your body."
Shi Chengyu took her hand and held it in his palm to warm it. She had been in poor health to begin with, and after this incident, she felt even worse than before. Now that the weather was getting colder, her body temperature also dropped.
"Would you like sweet porridge or salty porridge? Or would you like something else?"
Shen Chutang's face was red, not sure if it was from anger or shame. Shi Chengyu lowered his head from the side and kissed her cheek, "If you don't want to eat now, eat later. I'll warm your hands first."
Shen Chutang was imprisoned in his arms, unable to hide away, and her hands were held by him, gradually warming up. She felt as if a stone was pressing down on her heart. She didn't want to make trouble at all, but the better Shi Chengyu treated her, the more guilty she felt.
"Shi Chengyu, I can't give you anything."
Even a healthy girlfriend couldn't do it.
Shi Chengyu: "Tangtang, I have never thought about getting anything from you. As long as Tangtang allows me to stay by your side, that is enough."
"But Shi Chengyu, I don't want you to feel bad because of me." Shen Chutang stared at him with red and swollen eyes, which contained reluctance and heartache.
Shi Chengyu was stunned for the first time. He could accept any unreasonable behavior from Shen Chutang, but when she said so bluntly that she was uncomfortable, he felt a little shaken in his heart.
Shen Chutang gently pushed him away and lowered her head to wipe away her tears.
"Chengyu, go out first." Shen Sichen stood at the door, knocked, and said in a cold voice.
He walked in, put the lunch box on the table, and sat down beside the bed. "Shen Chutang, do you think life is more important or what you call fairness is more important?"
"You've been making trouble for two months, but you still haven't seen Shi Chengyu's determination?"
Shen Chutang raised his head stubbornly and looked at him neither arrogantly nor humbly.
Shen Sichen just looked at her calmly and said in a calm tone, "Shi Chengyu committed suicide. Did you know that?"
Shen Sichen knew that she had never seen Shi Chengyu's arm, otherwise she wouldn't have made such a fuss.
These words were like thunder from a clear sky. Shen Chutang's eyes instantly turned into fear. Her thoughts became slow and dull due to the shock. Tinnitus rang in her head.
Without waiting for her to ask, Shen Sichen continued to talk to himself, "Half a month before you woke up, we persuaded him to give up, and he did give up, gave up his life, and chose to commit suicide."
"A whole bottle of sleeping pills, and the cut on his arm hit an artery. He did it on purpose."
"Then when you woke up and were wheeled into the operating room, he knelt at the door and cried. Do you know what he was crying?"
"He said he would take me away."
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