Chapter 141 - Side Story 2 | First published on Jinjiang Literature City
The red candles burned brightly, illuminating the newlyweds entwined on the bed.
After cuddling for a while, the two finally drank the nuptial wine together.
Xiao Che helped her remove the phoenix crown and the heavy ceremonial robes.
She was wearing a snow-white nightgown, nestled in his arms, when suddenly she reached into her chest and pulled out a mirror pouch. She mysteriously took out a small object from it, held it in her palm, raised it high in front of him, and then abruptly released her fist, smiling radiantly: "Here, my husband, this is for you."
Xiao Che hummed in response, "What?"
Looking down, he saw a pair of diamond rings lying prominently in her soft, white palms.
Bathed in the candlelight, the light shone brightly and dazzlingly; it was the pair he had embedded in the snowman long ago.
It happened so long ago, so long that he thought it was a past life.
How heartless Xiaotu was that day, and how heartbroken he was. Such unforgettable pain, he thought he would never be able to let go of it in this lifetime, but now, only half a year later, he has reconciled with her as before, and those wounds have gradually been forgotten, becoming distant and blurred.
He realized he couldn't let her go after all. The hatred he felt for her fueled the burning passion in his relationship, making it even harder for him to let go.
Looking into Yan Jiarou's innocent, bright eyes, brimming with longing, his Adam's apple bobbed, his heart filled with complex emotions. He could only say, "You still keep this..."
"Yes, yes. I've kept everything my brother gave me, especially this... I know it's very meaningful, and I've kept it all this time, hoping that one day, at the right time, I could help you put it on again... I never thought that day would actually come..."
As he spoke, tears welled up in his eyes.
Xiao Che raised his hand and gently wiped away the tears from the corners of her eyes, asking in a tender tone, "Why are you crying?"
He extended a finger and beckoned to her: "Hey, aren't you going to help me put it on?"
Yan Jiarou immediately stopped crying and smiled, hastily wiping away her tears, helping him put on the ring, then immediately slipping the other ring onto her own finger, holding up her hand: "Look, my brother and I are a match made in heaven!"
Xiao Che glanced at her, raised his hand and gently stroked the tip of her nose, saying lazily, "Silly rabbit, it would have been so much better if you had realized this sooner."
Upon hearing this, Yan Jiarou couldn't help but cry again. She buried her face in his chest and snuggled against him, her voice trembling with sobs as she said pitifully, "Then...then it's not too late for me now!"
Xiao Che gave an "Oh?" and said ambiguously, "Is that so?"
"Yes! That's right! Brother, please say so..." Her voice trembled with tears.
The little rabbit is easily teased; if it really starts crying, it will probably take a lot of coaxing to soothe it.
Xiao Che chuckled softly, then withdrew his hand when he sensed the situation was turning against him. He loosely embraced her, lowered his head to kiss her forehead, and said lazily, "Alright, if my darling says so, then it is."
"That's more like it..." the little girl muttered softly, then paused, took something out of her bosom, and held it up for him to see: "Brother, look at this..."
Xiao Che tugged at the corner of his lips, about to ask how much she had hidden on their wedding night, but when his gaze shifted downwards and fell on what she was holding, he suddenly paused, his expression becoming complicated.
It was a jade pendant that was quite old; the jade color was no longer as clear as it used to be, but had become warm and lustrous with the passage of time.
This is a jade pendant that Jiang Chenyu commissioned to be made for him after his birth. It has a blessing and prayer engraved on it in Lanling script. He wore it with him from a young age. Around the age of ten, he lost the jade pendant and could not find it anywhere.
His Adam's apple bobbed, and in the end he could only say, "This thing has been lost for ten years. I never expected it to be with you..."
“It’s with me, Xiao Che. That year I fell into the water, and you jumped in to save me. I clung to you haphazardly and accidentally tore off this jade pendant. When I woke up, the first person I saw was Xiao Jue, so I assumed he was the one who saved me. He didn’t deny it, so I assumed the jade pendant was his. I returned it to him, but he said he didn’t want it and told me to throw it away. I couldn’t bear to part with it, so I kept it carefully. At that time, although I had some doubts, I always felt that Xiao Jue gave me a different feeling than the person who saved me underwater, but he spoke with such certainty, and since it was indeed him I saw first, I eventually believed him…”
"He told me that I should repay the debt of saving my life with my body. I am still young, and he will wait for me to grow up. He also said that since I had agreed to his request, I should not get too close to other princes. He heard that you made a bet with someone else to deceive him into believing that he saved me. There was a princess's testimony. Later, you did come to me and said that you were the one who saved me. I was not convinced and refused to believe you... I'm sorry, Xiao Che, for making you wait for me for so many years."
Xiao Che lowered his eyelids, concealing the emotions in his eyes, and said in a deliberately relaxed manner, "You know that too?"
He gave a barely perceptible twitch of his lips: "You little ingrate."
The years I secretly loved her were filled with bitterness and hardship that few people could understand.
It's like when the plums are ripe, the drizzle is continuous, and the dampness seems to seep into your bones, penetrating every crevice.
He watched her be intimate with Xiao Jue, whispering sweet nothings to him, but she never showed him the slightest kindness.
In previous years, during the Lantern Festival, the palace held a banquet. She would carry a palace lantern and enjoy the dazzling lights with Xiao Jue, while he stood in the shadows, seemingly superfluous even in his shadow.
His gaze toward them held jealousy, resentment, and unwillingness, but these feelings eventually faded into the deep darkness of the night, disappearing without a trace.
During those many restless days and nights, no one knew the wildly growing desire in his heart.
He desperately wanted to snatch her away, trap her beneath him, and let that soft, melodious voice call his name alone.
In his dreams, she did occasionally grant his wishes. After she came of age, he had many more dreams of her, in which she was just like she was now, giving him whatever he wanted and calling his name sweetly. However, during the day, all he saw was her being affectionate with Xiao Jue, smiling at him and nestled in his arms. The scene was truly jarring.
Fortunately, heaven took pity on him, and he finally got to see her turn around.
He was glad that it was the girl he secretly loved; from her perspective, there was no resentment or pain of unrequited love.
Therefore, his little rabbit has always been innocent and carefree.
He gently stroked her head and kissed her hair: "It's alright, it's all in the past."
Yan Jiarou looked up at him, her eyes glistening with tears, and asked, "Brother, won't you blame me?"
Xiao Che chuckled and reached out to pinch her cheek: "What else can we do, hmm? We can't exactly skin the rabbit and roast it, can we?"
His Adam's apple bobbed: "Life is long, so just love me a little more each day from now on."
The little girl stared at him intently and said seriously, "I will love you very, very much, and I will love you together with the child in my belly."
Xiao Che curled his lips: "Really?"
Xiao Che's eyelashes trembled almost imperceptibly.
Yan Jiarou said, "I know you've always had a knot in your heart. You hate that Consort Gui only ever used you as a pawn in her revenge. You feel that she never loved you. You're trapped in this cage and can't break free. Several times, in my half-dreaming state, I've heard you calling out 'Mother Consort' in your dreams, Xiao Che. You've never been able to let go of this, have you?"
"But I want to tell you today that she is not as heartless as you think. I only gradually came to this realization after I became pregnant. You are her flesh and blood. In this world, almost every mother loves her child. I think she loves you, but her life has been too bitter. She has been consumed by hatred all her life, which has blinded her and even her love for you. That's why she is willing to use you and sacrifice you to complete her revenge."
"But that doesn't prove she doesn't love you. Perhaps she just wants revenge. In her eyes, her own flesh and blood can't compare to the blood feud that wiped out her clan and destroyed her country."
"Was she wrong? As your wife, I naturally resent her. But if I were just an outsider, observing her life from a distance, I wouldn't feel any right to blame her. Her life was truly too bitter. Xiao Che, you know that, don't you? So even knowing she was using you, you still fulfilled her last wish. You ascended to this supreme position. If three parts were for me, then three parts must have been for her, right?"
Xiao Che's Adam's apple bobbed, his eyelashes trembled slightly, and his lips were pursed.
“The Imperial Concubine’s life has been full of suffering,” Yan Jiarou reached out and stroked his cheek, then said, “But then I think, what about my husband? Hasn’t his life been full of suffering too?”
"No matter what, my husband is innocent. The Consort may not have done anything wrong; she has been fair to everyone, but I think she should feel guilty towards you. Of course, you can choose not to forgive her, but if you spend your whole life trapped in the cage of 'she doesn't love you,' unable to let go of your obsession with being loved, then let me tell you, she did love you. This jade pendant alone, with its engraved hopes and wishes for you, is the best proof."
Upon hearing this, Xiao Che abruptly turned his face away, his jaw clenched tightly.
It suddenly started to rain in the middle of the night. The light rain tapped on the steps outside the corridor, which made the silence inside the hall even more pronounced, with only the occasional whirring of the lamp flames.
The candlelight suddenly flared up, reflecting the fleeting glint of tears in his eyes.
His nose finally stung with tears; it turned out that someone could understand the bitterness and resentment deep in his heart.
He simply wanted his mother to love him, just as all mothers in the world love their children.
He would give anything for this.
But that was destined to be impossible. He didn't know what he had done wrong, but what if he was wrong from birth?
He then fell into endless self-loathing.
Some things are destined to be unattainable. If one cannot accept this, it breeds delusions. Unable to obtain what one desires, it ultimately becomes a demon in one's heart.
I don't usually think about it, but when I wake up in the middle of the night, those dreams, like a persistent ailment, always evoke the hidden pain deep in my heart.
This is indeed a knot in his heart.
When she came to her senses, she saw her fingertips lightly tracing his eyebrows and eyes, looking at him reverently: "And even if she doesn't love you, so what? There will always be someone in this world who loves you..." She looked at him steadily, and smiled at him: "I will always love you, and the child in my womb will love its father with me. Xiao Che, life is long ahead, and I will never let you be alone again."
Her voice wasn't particularly loud, but it was soft and gentle, yet it possessed a strange power that brought peace to people's hearts.
It was as if at dawn, the first ray of light pierced through the darkness of the night, pushing back the shadows of the clouds inch by inch.
Finally, daylight broke, and the eternal night came to an end.
Yes, he still has her, and their child. His mother has her own reasons, and is destined not to give him the love he desires. Clinging to this is pointless. By the grace of heaven, he has already found a purer form of love.
Just like when she helped him out of a predicament in his childhood, she once again dispelled the gloom in his heart.
For him, she was always a ray of light in his life.
That light briefly illuminated his dark life, but in the blink of an eye, it became someone else's little sun. During those ten years of darkness, he despairingly imagined more than once that this was all there was to their lives. Fortunately, heaven took pity on them, the sun suddenly shone, and she finally returned to his side.
He suddenly pulled her tightly into his arms, lowering his head to deeply inhale her breath: "Yan Yan..."
Yan Jiarou also reached out and hugged him tightly.
What followed was gentler than any other time. He suppressed his restlessness and gradually took her in.
The two were doing the most intimate thing in the world, their souls entwined and gradually merging.
The feeling of the soul and body in perfect harmony is probably the most wonderful thing in the world.
It is only said that:
I envy not the moonlit encounter on the Jade Terrace, but only wish to indulge in a single pillow in this fleeting life. To have all the gentleness is to be in a fairyland, and to be the most romantic in the depths of the mortal world.
[Author's Note]
Barring any unforeseen circumstances, this will be the end of the story, but there will be a bonus chapter after the final chapter! In the female "what if" scenario, the female lead didn't mistake her savior and grew up following the male lead around sweetly, and there's also childbirth and breastfeeding, etc. I spent a long time on the last few lines because I really wanted a poetic ending, but couldn't find a suitable one, so I just made something up. The ending of my previous book was those two lines from *The Palace of Eternal Life*: "May this life end gently, not envying the immortal realm of white clouds," which Zun Du really liked!!
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