aldult
During the morning break, someone mentioned that Ms. Mina was already awake.
There was no cheering in the classroom; everyone stared blankly in one direction.
The math teacher walked into the classroom and told all the students in Class 18 to quickly return to their seats.
The fifth period in the morning was English class, but Ms. Mina didn't show up. Instead, Ms. Song, who teaches English to Class 19 next door, appeared. Ms. Song said that Ms. Mina was sick and she would be filling in for her class for the next few days.
Understanding the students' feelings, Teacher Song made a few more jokes in class—jokes with a touch of dry humor, but no one in Class 18 laughed. Perhaps there were smiles on their lips, but they showed a deliberate stiffness.
Teacher Song realized this and stopped forcing them to laugh. Making sad people laugh is itself a sad thing.
After the first period in the afternoon, physics class, Lu Er went to ask Deng Lianchun for leave.
During the remaining two study sessions, she seemed to be sitting on pins and needles, each second feeling like an eternity. At the last minute of four o'clock, the bell rang, and Lu Er jumped up.
Ruan Xiyan and Mi Tian were already waiting outside the classroom. The girl standing next to them was the class monitor of Class 4.
Ruan Xiyan nodded to her: "Let's go."
The four of them left the No. 3 Middle School gate. The hospital was the same one they had visited before, the one where Teacher Mina had been hospitalized for a cold; it was only a few dozen meters away.
The hospital was quiet, as if all sound had been cut off.
Teacher Mina's ward was on the sixth floor. Upon entering the room, you could see her lying on the pristine white hospital bed, her body covered in tubes. It was as if all her radiance had been stripped away, leaving only the monotonous white.
Mi Tian broke free from Lu Er's hand and ran forward.
Teacher Mina opened her eyes, her expression still gentle, but it was a weak kind of tenderness. She smiled, as if she had exerted all her strength to do so, and then closed her eyes again.
Mi Tian lay motionless on the edge of the bed. Lu Er walked over and took Mina's hand in her own. She thought her hands were cold enough, but Mina's hands were so cold that it felt like touching a layer of snow.
Standing beside the hospital bed were Ms. Mina's family members. Two elderly people, their backs hunched and their faces covered in wrinkles, sighed repeatedly while tears streamed down their faces; they must have been Ms. Mina's parents.
Deng Lianchun and some of the teachers from Ms. Gomina's office also passed by, all with heavy expressions. No one spoke.
Teacher Mina didn't have the strength to speak, so Ruan Xiyan and the others stayed for a while and then left without disturbing her and her family any further.
-
They stood in the long corridor outside, looking towards the hospital bed, silent to each other.
Deng Lianchun broke the silence first. He looked at Lu Er and the class monitor of Class 4: "You've all seen the situation with our English teacher... She has congenital heart disease and has been relying on medication to control it. The doctor said that her heart function has been slowly declining over the past few years, and it will only take two or three years for her to reach the end stage."
Lu Er twisted his fingers.
"It's probably because I've been too tired lately, under a lot of mental stress, and my sleep schedule has been irregular," Deng Lianchun said. "The burden on my heart is getting heavier every day, so the rate of deterioration has obviously accelerated..."
His voice grew softer: "If things go smoothly, it should be by the end of April at the latest." Meaning, at most three weeks.
Lu Erliao had considered this outcome, but he didn't expect it to come so quickly.
Teacher Mina is gone. What will happen to Mi Tian? What will happen to Class 18 and Class 4? What will happen to those who love her?
A familiar chill rolled in from the depths of her heart. Lu Er seemed to have returned to that summer, the summer when she was eight years old, a summer filled with white noise, a summer when she saw those two coffin lids that were both within reach and yet unattainable.
Deng Lianchun glanced into the ward and instructed in a low voice, "You are class monitors, and we are currently in the final sprint for the second mock exam. There are still more than two months until the college entrance exam. You need to keep everyone's mindset stable... I know you all like your English teacher, but there's nothing I can do about it."
Lu Er, Ruan Xiyan, and even the girl from Class 4 all nodded silently.
Ms. Mina was exhausted from working in her hospital bed, while the students endured this difficult time in the classroom. The whole class shared the same feelings.
During this time, Lu Er and several class leaders visited Teacher Mina at the hospital on behalf of the students of Class 18. Teacher Mina is now completely in a coma, sleeping endlessly every day, as if she is in summer hibernation.
Lu Er often couldn't sleep, tossing and turning until the middle of the night.
In mid-April, the usually lifeless Class 18 became a little more cheerful, a welcome change from the past. The reason was that their annual coming-of-age ceremony was approaching.
On their coming-of-age ceremony, every senior high school student dresses up meticulously. On this day, they dress up as the adults they imagine themselves to be, which, in a sense, means they have officially crossed the threshold of adolescence.
After class, the female students would gather in groups, discussing their favorite dresses and makeup. Then, someone would take the opportunity to muster up the courage to take a photo with their crush.
Lu Er had no intention of getting involved. Her gaze was fixed on the scenery outside the window, but she was thinking about the script reading party at last year's summer camp, when Teacher Mina said she wanted to see Lu Er's coming-of-age ceremony.
It was as if many little birds had flown into her heart. They couldn't find their way, fluttering about aimlessly. When they got hungry, they pecked at Lu Er's flesh.
Teacher Mina didn't make it through April. On the day she left, the plane trees in Huai'an sprouted new branches, creating a delightful green landscape.
All the students in Class 18 and Class 4 spontaneously went to see their teacher off. Perhaps the headmaster, Vulture, had a change of heart this time, and actually tacitly approved of the students skipping class.
After the funeral, Lu Er was stopped by Mina's parents. The two elderly people, their fingers trembling, took out an envelope containing ten thousand yuan: "This is what Xiao Na asked us to give you when she was in the hospital."
Lu Er refused to accept the money, but tears welled up in the old man's eyes: "We are old and sick, we are in the way and can't take care of Xiao Tian. It won't be of much use to us if we take the money..." They said that this was Teacher Mina's last wish, and Lu Er finally accepted it.
Mi Tian was picked up by her father, whom she had only heard about from Teacher Mina. When Mi Tian got home to pack her things, Lu Er was taking out the trash and going upstairs. The man was dressed in a suit and had a calm and composed look on his face.
After Mi Tian left, the apartment next door became empty. Lu Er once looked down from the apartment building and saw the four pots of geraniums. They had bloomed again sometime during the summer, their orange-red petals swaying gently in the summer breeze.
-
Class 18 got a new English teacher. Apparently, the Third Middle School was short-staffed, so they temporarily transferred an older teacher who was about to retire to teach them.
The male teacher was old and hard of hearing, so he inadvertently started talking to himself.
There's nothing we can do; the school is in a special situation right now, so teachers and students can only be tolerant of each other.
Lu Er noticed that she had been feeling sleepy lately. While other students were often drowsy during morning self-study or the first two periods, she was perfectly alert all morning. However, during the fifth period, which was close to lunchtime, she couldn't help but need to have her upper and lower eyelids stitched up.
She slept and woke up to a midday quiz, missing several lunches in a row.
Seeing how tired she looked, Lin Lanyan kindly let her rest for a while.
It was the same at noon today. After collecting the quiz answer sheets, Lu Er felt that intense fatigue again. Thinking she would take a short nap, she rested her face on her arm and closed her eyes.
In her sleep, Lu Er vaguely felt a breeze blowing past her ears and involuntarily opened her eyes.
Ruan Xiyan sat on the stool in front of her, holding a notebook in her hand and gently fanning herself. Seeing that she was awake, she blinked and said, "Teacher Xiaolu, want to sleep a little longer? There are still more than forty minutes left."
Lu Er was fast asleep, sweat trickling down her forehead. She wiped it away with the back of her hand and slowly looked around the empty classroom: "Ruan Xiyan... what are you doing here?"
"I heard from Chen Xiang that you've been sleeping in the classroom these past few days." Ruan Xiyan's gaze swept over her face, pale skin covering pitifully little flesh, her tone softening, "Have you been very tired these past few days?"
Lu Er sat up straight, her mind regaining some composure: "...A little."
Lu Er's dreams these past few times have all been the same: one minute she'll dream of Teacher Mina, the next she'll dream of Lu Zhan and Xu Qingri. The characters in her dreams are so real that when she wakes up and realizes that reality is the opposite of her dream, she feels a moment of disorientation.
Ruan Xiyan could see the change in her, and felt both pain and helplessness in his heart. He looked out the classroom window and suggested to her, "Want to go out and get some sun? The sun is quite warm today."
In reality, the midday sun was as scorching as a furnace. But Lu Er still accepted his invitation: "Let's go."
The campus was completely silent in the afternoon. She and Ruan Xiyan walked under the plane trees, their green shadows scattered on the ground as if they had been trampled over.
Lu Er and Ruan Xiyan sat on the lawn north of the cafeteria. Cicadas chirped from the distant sycamore trees, their calls echoing in wisps.
Lu Er bent her legs up, rested her arms on her knees, and let her mind wander.
Ruan Xiyan wanted to make her happy, so she tried to find a topic to talk about: "Teacher Xiaolu."
"Um?"
"Have you decided what to wear for your coming-of-age ceremony?" The ceremony is on April 30th, which is five days away.
"..." Lu Er rested her chin on her hand, asking instead of answering, "What do you want to wear?"
Ruan Xiyan touched her nose, her lips curled up, revealing a few white teeth: "I don't plan to wear anything. Because I look handsome in anything."
“…Narcissist.” Lu Er slapped his thigh lightly, but Ruan Xiyan deliberately grimaced and pulled away from where she was sitting. “Ouch.”
Lu Er ignored him, and he took a few steps away but then moved back on his own.
The sunlight was more intense than expected, scorching their faces. Ruan Xiyan took off his hooded jacket and covered their heads with it.
Lu Er and he huddled together, their heads pressed together, hiding under the coat.
Lu Er's heart fluttered for a rare moment, and she said, "Ruan Xiyan."
"What?"
"Sing me a song."
Ruan Xiyan was indignant, blinking her long eyelashes: "You think I'll just sing because you say so?"
"Fine, if you don't want to sing, then forget it."
"I'll sing, I'll sing. What do you want to hear?"
"Anything is fine."
Ruan Xiyan pondered for a few seconds, then hummed a little tune. It was a melody that Lu Er had never heard before.
"You reside in my heart, and my passenger seat will never be empty. When I express my love for you, I do so more directly... A romantic moment captured on my phone, your adorable dimples are my reward..."
"Whenever you look down, the King of Comedy will appear."
Ruan Xiyan's voice seems to have been born to sing. She sings any song beautifully.
Lu Er tilted her head, staring at his profile. Ruan Xiyan's skin was very fair, and between her upper and lower eyelashes, it was as if a pool of pure spring water was hidden.
She asked, "What's the name of this song?"
"Puzzle Love".
"..." Lu Er lowered his head and smiled slightly, "Ruan Xiyan."
Ruan Xiyan stopped singing and tilted her head: "What?"
"We look like idiots." They sat in the sun, their clothes covering their heads.
Ruan Xiyan suddenly reached out and poked her nose: "Idiot sings for idiot."
The two of them basked in the sun for a while through the thin hooded jacket. Sleepiness gradually crept in, and both Lu Er and Ruan Xiyan felt drowsy.
With her eyes half-closed, Ruan Xiyan heard Lu Er speak again: "Ruan Xiyan".
"Um?"
"Is that you, Rabbit Shrimp?"
"Huh...?!" After a second, Ruan Xiyan suddenly realized what was happening, her sleepiness completely gone. "No, what? That wasn't me! I don't play dirty tricks!"
Lu Er rested her chin on her hand and looked at him: "I don't think I mentioned which channel?"
"...Ah..." Ruan Xiyan realized she had been outmaneuvered and felt extremely frustrated. Her face fell, and she cautiously looked at her expression. "I, um...I'm sorry."
Lu Er was hiding something from him, and Ruan Xiyan wasn't stupid; he could tell. She said no, but she was. She always preferred to keep her thoughts and feelings to herself, bearing them alone.
That evening during self-study, Ruan Xiyan overheard some conversations. But she only caught snippets like "self-study" and "not here."
Lu Er was unwilling to tell him that Ruan Xiyan wouldn't wait, because he knew that even if he waited until the seas dried up and the rocks crumbled, he would most likely still not get her to confess her true feelings.
Ruan Xiyan asked Chen Xiang, and later asked Teacher Mina. He didn't know the real reason, but he could roughly deduce that Lu Er was short of money.
Having known Lu Er for so long, Ruan Xiyan was already familiar with her stubborn nature. After much thought, he approached Lin Lanyan from Class 12, hoping to lure her in through tutoring.
Lu Er's face remained calm; she always wore this expression, and Ruan Xiyan couldn't discern her thoughts at this moment. His heart pounded with anxiety, and he asked, "How did you know?"
Lu Er knew all too well that this tutoring came from suspicious sources. After all, she always felt that someone else was more suited to this kind of casual, wealthy, and freebie-like treatment.
After accidentally learning that Lin Lanyan and Li Xianjing knew each other, Lu Er found her junior high school class group chat and added Li Xianjing on WeChat. Li Xianjing was quite efficient and told her what had happened.
After Li Xianjing finished speaking, she asked another question: "So when you said you weren't familiar with him during summer camp, it was just to cover up your true intentions, right?"
“…Thank you.” Lu Er shook her head, “But I wasn’t wrong back then.”
"So what are you now?"
"We're together now."
After regaining her senses, Ruan Xiyan stared at her, her mind in turmoil: "Teacher Xiaolu, you're not angry, are you?"
"..." Lu Er put her hands on her knees, resting her chin on them, "Are you an idiot?"
“Because I know you definitely wouldn’t want to accept my help directly… so I had no choice but to use this method.” Lu Er fell silent, and Ruan Xiyan’s heart became even more chaotic. He hurriedly reached out to take her hand, but he dared not move too far. His fingers touched her briefly, then hesitated and hovered in the air.
“You’re such a… complete idiot.” Lu Er grasped his hand, looked at Ruan Xiyan, and fluttered her eyelashes twice.
Since you've done this, I really want to like you, to like you to the point of no return.
-
Lu Er didn't have enough time to prepare, and on the day of her coming-of-age ceremony, she only wore a black and white floral dress.
"If I hadn't had an early holiday and been able to come and do your makeup, I think you would have dressed very plainly for your coming-of-age ceremony." Sheng Jiao finished her makeup, took a few steps back to examine her, her eyes full of satisfaction with her makeup artist. "All done."
Lu Er smiled faintly: "Thank you." If Lu Er hadn't found it troublesome, Sheng Jiao would have also wanted to give her colored contact lenses, false eyelashes, and a perm.
Sheng Jiao suddenly became dissatisfied: "Why do you always have short hair? It's been like this since last year. Don't you plan to grow it out? Or do you want to grow it out after college?"
Lu Er subconsciously brushed the hair behind her ear; it had grown to her collarbone. "No, it's fine as it is."
Sheng Jiao glanced at her phone and saw that it was getting late: "Then I'll leave after I finish your makeup. I don't know many people, and it'll be boring to stay here."
Lu Er remembered something: "Didn't Wen Fei come with you this time?"
"I'm not coming."
Lu Er wondered if it was just her imagination, but it felt like those two words were being squeezed out from between her teeth.
The two went down from the dormitory building and headed towards the main gate of No. 3 Middle School. Sheng Jiao held her phone and remained silent.
As Lu Er escorted her to the school gate and said goodbye, Sheng Jiao turned to leave. Lu Er heard her seem to softly hum, "If you don't want to come, then you don't have to."
The coming-of-age ceremony lasted all day. The senior high school students were dressed in suits and evening gowns, each holding a bouquet of flowers, accompanied by their parents.
There was no one next to Lu Er. She hadn't mentioned her coming-of-age ceremony to Cui Feng or Lu Guoyang.
She never saw Ruan Xiyan. The opening ceremony was over, the procession had left, and she still couldn't find any trace of Ruan Xiyan.
The playground was packed with people. Lu Er went to the formation of Class 23 and was told by a girl that he hadn't come in the morning.
Lu Er sat alone under the flower bed, beginning to consider whether or not to call Ruan Xiyan.
On stage, the principal and director set off celebratory cannons. Countless pieces of paper burst forth, colorful smoke billowed, and the group of teenagers cheered.
This is a coming-of-age ceremony, a transition from childhood to adulthood.
Lu Er remained seated silently, as if she did not belong to this group and was outside of them.
"Teacher Xiaolu!"
When the voice rang out, Lu Er was stunned, suddenly stood up, and hurriedly looked around.
Ruan Xiyan ran up to him. He really wasn't dressed up anything special today. A burgundy baseball cap, a T-shirt, and jeans—a very simple outfit.
Lu Er seemed to remember seeing her before. Last summer, on that rainy day, at the beginning of that dream.
On the day they first met.
“My parents insisted on taking me to a temple in Sui City to burn incense, which delayed our return.” Ruan Xiyan took a deep breath, her bright eyes looking at her. “You look beautiful today.”
He handed over the bouquet of flowers he was holding: "Happy coming-of-age ceremony."
Lu Er blinked slowly, swallowing back the sourness in her throat: "Ruan Xiyan, I have no parents."
Ruan Xiyan smiled, put one arm around her waist and back, and pulled her into her arms: "I am."
You are not alone.
I'll be there for you as you grow up.
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