Chapter 63 Chang Dafeng Bravely Enters the Men's Restroom
So, why did Chang Dafeng fall into the toilet again?
This all started with Zheng Haihua.
Cheng Jiajia was right about what she just said, and by sheer coincidence, she was partially right. Zheng Haihua was indeed following behind the Zhu brothers, heading to blow up the toilet.
However, they weren't going to blow up any female ghosts.
Instead, Zheng Haihua had heard the two Zhu brothers say many times that they used to have a lot of fun blowing up latrines in the countryside, and it would be even more fun if they could blow up someone's filth.
All the brats in the world are the same. Zheng Haihua was envious of what they said and had longed to try it out for a long time.
It just so happened that there were some firecrackers left over from the Qin family's wedding today. Zheng Haihua picked up a few and then dragged the two Zhu brothers over to give him some pointers.
These kids were clever; they knew they couldn't tell the adults about this, so they slipped away while everyone was at the Qin family's house.
When Chang Dafeng arrived, the three children were squatting outside the public toilet, whispering and discussing how to take advantage of someone's inattention to give them a big pounding, preferably one that leaves them covered in cum.
Chang Dafeng overheard this and glared fiercely at the two little brats from the Zhu family. It was all their fault for leading her Haihua astray!
Otherwise, her son is very well-behaved, so why would he come over and blow up the toilet?
Chang Dafeng said angrily, "Haihua, Haihua, come back with me now!"
Zheng Haihua wasn't having it. He hadn't yet experienced how exhilarating it was to blow up a toilet. "Mom, wait a bit. Let's blow up the toilet before we go back. Remember to save some food for me, don't let anyone steal it!"
He knew that the Qin family in the Third Courtyard was having a wedding today, and there would be plenty of meat dishes, which he was determined to eat.
Chang Dafeng was furious. "Pah! You brat, you're still thinking about food? What were you doing blowing up the toilet? Get back here right now! Do you hear me?"
Zheng Haihua, with his neck stiff, shouted, "No, no! I'm going to blow up the toilet! I'm going to blow up the toilet!"
Chang Dafeng was furious and stepped forward to twist Zheng Haihua's ear and drag him back.
To everyone's surprise, Zheng Haihua was small and agile, and he slipped under her arm in a flash and quickly entered the men's restroom.
The brat was still sticking his tongue out at Chang Dafeng and making faces at the door, saying, "Hehehe, you can't catch me, you can't catch me!"
Chang Dafeng was so angry that she jumped up and down, cursing, "You brat! You idiot!"
"You brat, get back here right now! This isn't a place where you can run wild!"
Ever since the rumors of a female ghost claiming lives spread, many adults have been terrified when they come to this toilet. This brat is really ignorant of the immensity of heaven and earth, daring to run wild here.
"I'm not going back, I'm not going back!"
Seeing that Zheng Haihua had already gone into the toilet, Chang Dafeng was afraid that her precious son might do something rash and anger the female ghost in the toilet. In her haste, she stamped her foot and followed him in.
As luck would have it, someone was relieving himself in the men's restroom. It was none other than Ma Gaosheng from the front yard.
Ma Gaosheng deliberately took a break before the banquet started, saving room to drink to his heart's content at the banquet later.
Who knew someone would barge in while I was peeing?
Ma Gaosheng didn't pay any attention to the noise outside. He was enjoying himself when he watched Chang Dafeng rush in.
Startled, Ma Gaosheng shuddered and, before he could hold back his urination, quickly stuffed the object back into his pants.
"Holy crap, you pervert, you're being a pervert!"
"Fuck your grandma's legs!"
Chang Dafeng was already furious, and hearing his shouting and yelling only made her more annoyed, so she cursed back without thinking.
"What are you doing? What are you doing?!"
Ma Gaosheng didn't even have time to fasten his belt as he glared at Chang Dafeng with anger and vigilance.
"Aunt Chang, what are you doing in the men's restroom?! Let me tell you, I know I'm good-looking, have a good job, and am popular with women, but I have no interest in an old woman like you! Even if you saw my body, I wouldn't do anything to you, so don't even dream about it!"
Chang Dafeng: "!!!"
Even the thick-skinned Chang Dafeng was stunned by his shamelessness.
Pah!
Damn it, who wants to look at that ugly, dark thing?
She even complained that it was dirty to her eyes!
What the heck is that?!
She retorted angrily, "Who looked? Who looked at you? What's so interesting about you, you ugly, dark enoki mushroom?! I haven't even blamed you for polluting my eyes yet!"
Ahhh!
Sure enough, sure enough, she actually saw it!
That old shrew really did have designs on my handsome looks!
Ma Gaosheng was filled with shame and indignation, pointing at Chang Dafeng with a trembling voice.
"You...you...you still say you didn't watch it?!"
"I knew it! I knew it! I knew you had designs on me! Tell me, have you been spying on me for a long time?! You pervert!"
Ma Gaosheng could have his own tricks up his sleeve, but he couldn't accept being seen naked by a slovenly old woman. He felt dirty! Dirty!
Ahhh!
Wait, something seems off!
Ma Gaosheng realized what was happening and immediately retorted angrily, "You're the enoki mushroom! Your whole family are enoki mushrooms! I'm clearly this magnificent! Otherwise, why would an old widow like you, who died at the hands of her husband, be peeping?!"
Chang Dafeng immediately jumped up and spat heavily, "Pah! You're like a chili pepper hanging on a tree, you have no self-awareness at all! Peeping? I don't care what you have to show me! What do you have to show me?!"
Her son isn't that useless!
Ma Gaosheng retorted angrily, "You're the chili pepper! Your whole family are chili peppers!"
Ahhh!
Damn it! Damn it!
That old shrew is so despicable!
Ma Gaosheng's face turned red, and his chest heaved with anger, looking like he was about to explode.
That's not all.
Chang Dafeng was afraid he wasn't angry enough, so she deliberately pinched her little finger with her thumb and pointed it out.
She spat contemptuously, "You've got nothing better to offer than this tiny bit of trash! And you dare to show your face like this! You think you can take advantage of me? Bah! I wouldn't even look at you! You little thing!"
It's not very harmful, but extremely insulting.
Ahhh!
"You bitch! You bitch! You bitch who deserves to die a horrible death!"
Ma Gaosheng lost his temper immediately. He wasn't one to follow the rules, and unable to bear it any longer, he kicked out with a loud "bang".
I originally thought that this kick would definitely land on Chang Dafeng.
Unexpectedly, this skinny old woman was surprisingly quick-witted and agile, dodging the attack with a sliding tackle.
Ma Gaosheng: "!!!"
Chang Dafeng twisted and turned, "It's a little thing, you can't hit it, you can't hit it! Hehehe!"
Ma Gaosheng stared at the man, panting heavily.
Ugh! How could that old shrew be so vile! Why doesn't she just die!
Seeing this, Chang Dafeng looked smug and felt very pleased.
Little brat, still playing with her!
There's a saying that goes, "Extreme joy begets sorrow," and there's some truth to that.
No sooner said than done.
Just as Chang Dafeng was getting so angry with Ma Gaosheng that she was practically fuming,
She tripped and slipped, making a crisp "plop" sound.
Chang Dafeng has fallen into the cesspool again in a spectacular fashion.
And unlike last time when I only stepped on it lightly, this time I fell in completely.
Ma Gaosheng: "!!!"
Ma Gaosheng stared in shock, then burst into laughter.
"Damn it, karma, karma!"
That was fucking awesome!
He finally felt relieved!
Chang Dafeng: "!!!"
Ahhh!
Chang Dafeng looked terrified.
"Gulp" "Gulp"
"Help! Help me!"
"Ma Gaosheng, please save me!"
Ma Gaosheng sneered, "Anyway, no one will die. You old shrew, your mouth stinks like a cesspool, so just stay in there!"
After saying that, he ignored Chang Dafeng and walked straight out.
That old shrew is filthy; he has no interest in saving her.
He'd be considered kind if he just said something to her family!
As for Zheng Haihua, that brat, he sneaked out as soon as his mother and Ma Gaosheng started arguing. What a filial son!
...
When the news of Chang Dafeng falling into the cesspool reached the compound, the entire compound was shocked.
"Oh no, how did Aunt Chang fall in again?"
"Oh dear, how come we fell in during someone's wedding again?"
"Good heavens, this person might have some kind of weird fetish, right?" someone with a vivid imagination wondered.
Well, to be honest, it does have a pretty wild imagination.
Everyone stared at the man speechlessly.
...
Falling into a cesspool is no different from the petty squabbles of other old ladies and young wives. Upon hearing the news, Zou Qianjin immediately rushed to the scene.
It's cold now, and he's afraid that people inside will freeze to death. If that happens, it would be his responsibility as the caretaker. So Zou Qianjin ran very fast, which is nothing like his usual "late arrival" style.
When I got to the public restroom, wow!
People lined up around the entrance to the men's restroom, watching Chang Dafeng struggle in the latrine, but no one stepped forward to help her.
Zou Qianjin shouted angrily, "What are you all standing there for? Hurry up and save them!"
Grandpa Zou is usually quite well-behaved in the courtyard, but this time, not only did everyone ignore him, they all took a step back.
Zou Qianjin glared, "What are you doing? What's going on here? Don't you have any sense of neighborly affection?!"
Everyone gave an awkward laugh and took another step back.
Good heavens! This is a cesspool, a cesspool!
Who would dare to approach?
Aren't you afraid of getting that stuff all over your body?!
What's with all this talk of neighborly affection?
Do they have that kind of thing with that old shrew Chang Dafeng?
Zou Qianjin: "..."
Someone's eyes lit up, "What about Aunt Chang's daughter-in-law? Let her come! And Zheng Haicheng, we can't just stand by and watch while we do the work, can we? They're family, they can't stand idly by!"
"It's here! It's here!"
Jiang Qiubai, who was hiding in the crowd, was suddenly pulled out, and everyone's eyes immediately fell on her.
Jiang Qiubai felt as if he were being roasted over a fire.
He could only give an awkward smile and step forward. "I don't know where Haicheng is. Uncle Zou, I can't move my mother by myself. I'll have to trouble you to help me find two more neighbors."
Even if she was unwilling or disgusted, this was her mother-in-law, and once discovered, she couldn't escape it no matter what.
Zou Qianjin glanced at the crowd and immediately moved far away, looking at the sky and the ground but ignoring them.
he:"……"
Finally, gritting her teeth, she said, "Go find a rope. Your Aunt Hao, you, and I will pull it together!"
Jiang Qiubai quickly found a piece of hemp rope in the house.
She, Zou Qianjin, and Aunt Hao spent half a day working before finally managing to pull Chang Dafeng up.
All three of them were dirty to varying degrees.
Jiang Qiubai felt nauseous at the stench, her face turned ashen, and her impatience with her mother-in-law deepened.
Why did you go to the men's restroom for no reason? Couldn't you just stay on the table?
The feast that I myself long for is something my mother-in-law doesn't appreciate at all.
Jiang Qiubai was very unhappy.
Suddenly, a foul stench swept in.
The expressions of the onlookers changed to varying degrees.
Guan Ailian covered her nose and backed away, saying with disgust, "Aunt Chang, how did you fall in again? Is it really true, as they say, that you have a special fondness for this cesspool?"
Oh dear, this is truly disgusting! She must have had the worst luck in eight lifetimes to have such a person as her neighbor!
Everyone: "..."
God has a special fondness for it!
I can barely hold back my laughter!
After Chang Dafeng came up, she immediately reverted to her usual shrewish self, spitting and cursing, "Pah! I don't like it! It's Ma Gaosheng, Ma Gaosheng, you little brat, come out here!"
"I just glanced at your little firecracker by accident, and you kicked me into the latrine, you heartless bastard!"
Everyone: "!!!"
Everyone stared in shock, their mouths agape.
What the heck?!
Chang Dafeng's statement contained too many elements, making it difficult for everyone to digest them all at once.
Was it Ma Gaosheng who kicked her into the cesspool?
Wait, did Chang Dafeng watch Ma Gaosheng's Little Chili?
Oh no, no!
Ma Gaosheng is actually a feisty character?!
I slowly digested the amount of information inside.
Now, everyone's mouths were agape, wide enough to fit an egg.
The way he stared at Ma Gaosheng was so intense, it was as if he wanted to burn a hole in his crotch.
Ma Gaosheng, hiding in the crowd: "!!!"
Ma Gaosheng swore he had never been so humiliated!
His face flushed red as he glared at Chang Dafeng, trembling with anger. "Who's the chili pepper?! Who's the chili pepper?! Huh?"
"You old shrew, you were hiding in the toilet spying on me, and after I firmly rejected you, you started slandering me because you couldn't have my advances!"
"She just wants to take advantage of me because I'm young and good-looking. She's an old pervert!"
What?!
Everyone was shocked again.
Chang Dafeng had ulterior motives towards Ma Gaosheng, and even went to the toilet to spy on him?!
Wait, no, the point is, Chang Dafeng likes young men?!
I never knew Aunt Chang liked this kind of thing before.
Suddenly, everyone's gaze towards Chang Dafeng changed.
All the young men in the courtyard suddenly felt a chill run down their spines, wondering what to do if they were in danger.
The men present all tacitly took a few steps back, distancing themselves from Chang Dafeng.
They didn't want to be targeted by this old shrew; it was so disgusting!
Chang Dafeng immediately jumped up and down, yelling, "Pah! How could I possibly want you, you ugly black enoki mushroom?! Don't try to flatter yourself!"
To slander her for liking this ugly thing is tantamount to insulting her own character, and Chang Dafeng will never allow it!
Although she doesn't really have any personality, she just won't allow it!
"You, you shrew! You old rogue! You're talking nonsense!"
When his shortcomings were exposed in public, Ma Gaosheng was so angry that his face turned red and his neck bulged. However, he refused to admit that he was a mushroom or that he was dark-skinned and ugly.
He looked incredibly dashing!
"What nonsense am I spouting? You didn't kick me?! Or are you not some ugly black enoki mushroom?!"
"I don't care, you heartless bastard, you kicked me into the latrine and ruined all my clothes, you have to pay for it!" After talking for a while, Chang Dafeng finally showed her fangs.
Ma Gaosheng sneered, "Pah! You clearly fell in yourself! You want me to pay you back? Dream on!"
He's absolutely right. Chang Dafeng fell in on her own, so he's not going to pay any compensation.
Then, his tone changed abruptly, and he suddenly said, "You old shrew saw me naked, so even if anyone has to pay compensation, it should be this old shrew who pays me!"
"Hurry up, fifteen yuan!"
Bao Dayan could only pay Zheng Haiyang five yuan for taking advantage of him, but this old shrew saw him naked, so she'll definitely have to pay even more!
Chang Dafeng: "!!!"
She stared in shock, unable to believe what she was hearing.
How can there be anyone in this world more shameless than myself?!
He only glanced at his feisty little devil, and she's making him pay?!
Is that what she wanted to see?!
Is that what she likes to watch?!
Why should she have to pay compensation?!
Why should I?!
Chang Dafeng jumped up and yelled, "Pah! Your ugly thing has dirtyed my eyes and polluted my pure soul. You're the one who should pay me back!"
Having just caught his breath after saving the person, Zou Qianjin came to his senses when he heard this shocking conversation.
Zou Qianjin: "!!!"
He touched his bald head with a pained expression. His life was miserable! His life was truly miserable!
How did he end up with such a bunch of oddballs?
Ahhh!
He doesn't want to work at this lousy management office for even a day longer!
Continue read on readnovelmtl.com
